The Tender Flame (33 page)

He hurried to the cupboard, where they kept a Bible for reading at the table. He knelt beside her again, flipped pages, and laid the Bible before her. “Psalm 18:30. Can you see to read it?”

Jessica wiped the tears from her eyes. “I can now.”

“Read it to me.”

“ ‘As for God, his way is perfect: the word of the L
ORD
is tried: he is a buckler to all those that trust in him.’ ”

“We have to trust God to work His will in our lives and in the lives of our loved ones. Only His will is what’s right for us. Isn’t that right?”

Jessica met his loving gaze. “Yes.”

“We have prayed continuously for your mother’s healing, haven’t we?”

“Yes,” she said, sniffing.

“Well, honey, our precious God is now testing us to see if we will trust that His way is perfect, even if it doesn’t look perfect to us. Does that make sense?”

It took her a moment to reply. “Yes, it makes sense. The Lord wants us to believe Him and His Word, in spite of circumstances and what we think is best.”

“That’s it. Without faith, it is impossible to please Him. He wants our faith in regard to your mother. We must trust that His way is perfect and believe that He will do what is best and right. Let’s talk to Him right now about this.”

When Josh had finished praying, Jessica wrapped her arms around him and said, “I love you, Josh. Thank you for showing me this verse. It has been a tremendous help.”

Once again, Josh folded her into his strong arms. “Sweetheart, I love you more than you will ever know, and when you hurt, I hurt.”

Jessica looked toward heaven and said, “Lord Jesus, thank You for giving me this wonderful man.”

A
UTUMN IN
O
REGON TOOK ON A WINTRY LOOK
as November passed into December. Early in the third week of December, Josh and Jessica Cornell received a letter, written by both Daniel Smith and his new bride. He and Susan thanked them for the lovely wedding gift, and Susan told them how much she looked forward to the day she could meet Daniel’s sister and brother-in-law.

Daniel informed them that Carrie had not been able to attend his wedding. She was simply too weak to leave her bed.

Christmas came and went, as did New Year’s Day. A letter from Grant in early February held a note of encouragement. Carrie had actually been out of bed and on her feet some. Bessie Williams was taking good care of her, and Dr. Stafford seemed encouraged.

This news eased some of Jessica’s concern for her mother, in the midst of preparations for Pastor Farrington’s retirement and Josh’s installation as pastor of the church.

On March 29, 1873, Jessica went to the general store in Oregon City for a few groceries. On the way home, she stopped at the post office and was given a letter from her father.

When Josh came home at suppertime, he saw the glum look on his wife’s face. “What’s wrong, honey?” he said as he hugged her.

She leaned her head against his chest. “A letter came from Daddy today.”

“Your mama?”

“She’s back in the hospital. Daddy says we shouldn’t be alarmed, but he felt we should know. The letter was written on the twenty-first. He said she was stable. But that was eight days ago.”

Josh kissed the top of her head. “I think you should go to her, sweetheart.”

Jessica pulled back to look in his eyes. “I can’t, Josh. You’re going to become pastor a week from Sunday. I must be here with you. If I only knew—”

“Knew what?”

“If Mama was still stable, or even still in the hospital.”

“I’ll send a wire in the morning and ask your father to give us a quick answer.”

“Oh, thank you. It will help if I know she’s not worse. But Josh, even if she is, I must be here when you become pastor.”

“Let’s see what we can find out tomorrow.”

Grant’s wire came back late in the afternoon the next day. Carrie was still in the hospital but was holding her own. Dr. Stafford was watching her closely. Grant would send a wire if there was any significant change. He also told Josh how proud he was that he was about to become pastor of the church.

Relieved that her mother was not worse, Jessica said, “April 7 is going to be such a wonderful day, Josh.”

“Honey, I appreciate you so much. And I’m glad you want to be here for the big day. But if your mother gets worse, you’re heading for Denver immediately after your husband becomes pastor.”

April 7 came, and after the Sunday evening service, Lester Farrington officially resigned. It was only a formality, but in the business meeting the church voted 100 percent to call Joshua Cornell as their new pastor.

On the following Saturday, Josh and Jessica returned to their house after eating lunch with Lydia and found the Western Union messenger on their porch. Josh signed for the telegram, and the messenger went on his way.

When they were inside the house, Josh looked at his wife’s pale face and said, “Do you want me to open it?”

Jessica closed her eyes and nodded.

Josh’s shoulders slumped as he read the message.

“Your mama has taken a severe turn for the worse, honey. She’s dying. The doctor says it’s only a matter of days. Your daddy is asking if both of us, or at least you, can come. He says to hurry if you want to see your mother while she’s still alive.”

Josh grabbed Jessica as her knees gave way and hugged her to himself.

“Honey, we’ll both go,” Josh said. “I’ll talk to Brother Farrington, explain the situation, and ask if he will look after the church while I’m gone.”

“Oh, thank you, Josh. I can face this much easier if you’re with me.”

“I’ll go see him right now. But before I do, I’ll run and bring Lydia to be with you. Can you stay alone long enough for me to bring her?”

She nodded. “It will really help if I can talk to Mom right now.”

The two women were seated on the couch when Josh returned home. Lydia had an arm around Jessica, whose eyes were swollen from weeping.

“Everything’s set,” he said quietly. “Brother Farrington will look after the church while we’re gone. He asked if I minded if he switched off with Casey, since Casey’s proving to be quite a preacher. I agreed to that, of course.”

“God has His hand on that young man,” Lydia said.

“No question about it.”

“He’s been a blessing to you, darling,” Jessica said. “It’s wonderful to see one of your own sons in the Lord develop like he has.”

“For sure,” said Josh, sitting on a chair, facing them. “Honey, I went over to the Wells Fargo office and set us up for the trip. The first stage to Ogden is Monday morning at eight o’clock. We’ll be in Ogden on Wednesday in time to catch the late train to Cheyenne
City. We’ll take the morning train to Denver on Thursday and be there at 10:45.”

“Thank you for going to all this trouble.”

Josh dropped to one knee in front of Jessica and took her hand. “Sweetheart, it’s no trouble. You’re my wife, and that sweet lady in Denver is very special to me. We’ll get to her just as soon as possible.” Josh turned to Lydia. “And you are very special to me too. Thank you for being so good to Jessica.”

“You’re welcome, Josh. I love Jessica, and it’s my privilege to be of whatever help I can.”

That evening, Josh and Jessica went to his parents’ home and told them the situation. While Brett led them in prayer, Mary Ann and Martha placed their arms around Jessica.

From the pulpit the next day, Josh explained the situation to the congregation. Everyone was sympathetic, and at the close of both the morning and evening services, the people passed by at the door and spoke words of love and comfort to their pastor’s wife, and told both of them they would be holding them up in prayer.

Josh and Jessica arrived in Denver Thursday morning on schedule, rented a horse and buggy, and hurried to Mile High Hospital. Josh kept a solid hold on Jessica’s hand as they approached the desk. He greeted the lady behind it and said cautiously, “Ma’am, we’re here from Oregon to see a patient, Mrs. Carrie Smith. Is she …?”

“Mrs. Smith is in room 112, sir,” the receptionist said. “Her family is with her at the moment.”

“Thank you,” Josh said, and led a trembling Jessica past the desk into the hall.

They came to the room, and Josh paused before the door. “Are you all right, honey?”

Jessica took a deep breath, then nodded. “Yes. Jesus is very near.”

Josh put an arm around her waist and pushed open the door.

Grant and David were on one side of the bed; Daniel and Susan on the other.

Tears filled Grant’s eyes as he rushed to his daughter and put his arms around her. “Sweetheart, I’m so glad you’re here!” he said, keeping his voice to a whisper. “I’ve been telling your mama you were coming. She’s asleep right now, but we’ll wake her shortly.”

While Grant and Jessica were talking in low tones, David welcomed Josh and introduced him to his wife.

After Jessica had hugged her brothers, she turned to the sister-in-law she had never met and whispered, “Hello, Susan. It’s so nice to finally meet you.”

“Nice to meet you, too,” said Susan, and they held on to each other for a long moment.

Jessica kept her arm around Susan as she looked at her father. “How’s she doing, Daddy?”

“She’s worse. We really didn’t expect her to be here this long.”

Jessica let go of Susan and moved to the bed. Josh drew up beside her. She bit down hard on her lower lip as she looked at her dying mother. Carrie was so tiny now, she hardly made a bump in the blanket covering her body. Her once round, rosy cheeks were sunken, and the skin covering them was waxy pale.

Carrie stirred, groaning as she opened her pain-filled eyes. Her lips had a faint blue cast, but when she focused on the face of her daughter, they widened in a smile. “Oh, my precious Jessica!” she said, raising a hand toward her daughter.

Jessica smiled directly into her mother’s eyes as she clasped the shaky hand. “Hello, sweet Mama,” she said softly. “I love you.”

“Daddy said you were coming.”

“Josh is here too, Mama.”

Carrie’s dull eyes found Josh’s face as he bent low and said, “Hello, Mama.”

Carrie swallowed with difficulty and pressed another smile on her lips. “Josh. I’m so glad … you’re here.”

Carrie looked into Jessica’s eyes. “I … I had to wait till—” Her words were interrupted with a hacking cough. The others gathered close to the bed.

When Carrie stopped coughing, she went around the circle, telling each one in a voice barely above a whisper that she loved them. Each one spoke in turn, saying the same to her. As Josh took Jessica in his arms, he could tell the Lord was giving her inward peace and strength.

Carrie beckoned Grant to move closer. He bent over her, inches from her face. She lifted a thin, trembling hand and caressed his face. “I love you, darling.”

Grant blinked at his tears and took the hand in his own. He raised it to his lips and placed a kiss in her palm. Never taking his eyes from hers, he whispered, “I love you, my precious.”

With a wan smile on her face, Carrie peacefully closed her eyes and slipped from her husband’s hands into the hands of hovering angels, who carried her into the glorious presence of her loving Father on high.

There was a long pause as the family stood beside the bed, weeping quietly. Then Grant tucked the frail, lifeless hand under the covers and said, “She’s with Jesus now.”

The family collected in a circle, arms around each other. Grant turned to Jessica. “I know what your mother meant to say when the cough interrupted. She had to wait till she saw you one more time before she could go to heaven.”

Jessica hugged her father tight. “I’m so glad the Lord let Josh and me come. We have all eternity to be with her when we meet her in heaven, but these were precious moments. But I can’t wish her back, Daddy. She’s with Jesus, and she’s out of this frail body.”

Josh and Jessica took a liking to Daniel’s wife, Susan, who fit into the family perfectly. They were all a great comfort to Grant when the funeral was held two days later. Josh had a part in the service,
which was a special blessing to Jessica.

Daniel and Susan would be leaving for Ohio within a couple of weeks. Susan had an uncle who owned a large manufacturing company in Columbus and had offered Daniel a good job so he could go to school and get his business degree.

David had just received word of his appointment to the United States Military Academy at West Point and would be leaving for New York in August.

On the night before they would begin their journey home, Josh and Jessica sat in the Smith parlor with Grant. Colorado’s nights were still quite cold in April, and a fire was crackling in the fireplace.

“Dad,” said Josh, “Jessica and I have been discussing something, and we’d like to talk to you about it.”

“Sure, son, what is it?”

“Well, since Daniel and Susan are going to Ohio, and David will be going to West Point … we’d like for you to come to Oregon City and live with us.”

“You mean you’d want your father-in-law living under your roof?”

“Sure. We’ve got a spare bedroom.”

“We’d love to have you, Daddy,” Jessica said.

“Aw, kids, I’d just be underfoot. If I came, I’d buy my own place.”