THE TEXAS WILDCATTER'S BABY (16 page)

Was that how they looked to others? Ginger wondered, astonished.

Cordelia told her, “I want to be married again and have a fuller, more satisfying life. And seeing you with your new husband is what’s convinced me to do so.”

* * *

“S
HE
THINKS
WE
’
RE
in love,” Ginger told Rand over dinner that same night.

He studied her, as if not getting the guilt they should both feel.

“We both know that love never entered into our decision to marry,” Ginger pointed out.

Another inscrutable look. Another long, thoughtful pause. “That’s true.” He frowned. “But—”

Ginger’s cell phone rang. It was the notification she had been waiting on. She swallowed and picked it up, her hand trembling with apprehension. “Ginger Rollins.” She listened, her spirits sinking like a stone. “Yes. I understand.” She ignored Rand’s concerned look, then managed to say, “Thank you. I appreciate that.” She closed her phone, not the least bit consoled to discover her bid had come in fourth overall. “I didn’t land the job. Your mother’s company did.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Me, too,” Ginger admitted. Had she not been married and expecting a baby, she probably would have been devastated. “But if it wasn’t me,” she said, determined to be a good sport despite the setback, “I’m glad it was her.”

A knock sounded on the door. Josie McCabe was on the other side of the screen. Squaring her shoulders, Ginger smiled at her mother-in-law and motioned her in. “Congratulations.”

Rand glared at his mom in exasperation.

“Couldn’t you have given Ginger a little time to lick her wounds?” he demanded.

Josie came forward briskly, businesslike as ever. “No, I couldn’t. I need to ask Ginger what I’ve been wanting to ask her for weeks. I want you to come to work for my company. And I want you to work with me on the Boerne project. And, Rand, I want you to come to work for me, too.”

Rand gave his mother a wary look. There was an undercurrent between them that Ginger could not decipher, but clearly something was going on between them.

“Why?” Rand asked tersely.

Josie gave Rand an enigmatic look back. One that confirmed there was something else going on, some other reason besides Ginger’s and Rand’s business acumen.

Josie lifted a hand, index finger up. “Because Wyatt Drilling has always been a family company, handed down to me from my dad.” Her finger count went to two. “You are the only one of my children who is remotely interested in the oil business on any level.” She raised a third finger. “I think having an environmentalist on board to advise us on each and every project is a good idea. And four—” she made the appropriate gesture “—I think the three of us working together to run this company will be a very good thing.”

Josie’s smile encompassed both Ginger and Rand. “I don’t expect an answer right away. I know you have to think about it, but when you are ready to sit down and hammer out the details, let me know, and we’ll do it.”

“I don’t appreciate the timing, Mom,” Rand told her rather brusquely.

Josie gave Rand another telltale look that seemed to speak volumes. “Just think about it,” she said as she headed out the door.

When they were alone again, Ginger asked, “Did you have any idea that was coming?”

Rand helped her clear the table. “None.”

Aware she hadn’t had this nagging sense of being deliberately excluded in a familial tiff since she’d been married to Conrad, Ginger put a pot of decaf coffee on to brew. “Well, it doesn’t make sense to me,” she ruminated, still wondering what Rand—and Josie—weren’t telling her.

“Why would your mom be in such a rush to have us both working with her?”

Rand shrugged and averted his gaze. “You’re a tough, talented competitor. She probably doesn’t want anyone else to hire you.”

There was still something missing. Ginger continued pacing. “I mean, it would make sense why she’d want to bring me into the family company as soon as possible if she knew about the baby. But there’s no way she could know about that. Unless...” Ginger studied the peculiar expression on Rand’s face. “Did you tell her?”

A long, reluctant pause followed. “I didn’t have to,” he conceded finally. “She and your mother had already figured it out.”

The news was like a bucket of ice water poured over her head.
“When?”

He barely looked at her. “From the moment they saw us on our wedding day. They saw how you were glowing. Noticed how fast and determinedly we were getting hitched—despite the fact we had both vowed after our divorces that we would never say ‘I Do’ to anyone again.” He spread his hands wide, as if it were no big deal. “And they figured it out.”

“And told you.”

He gave her a longer, narrow look. “No. I walked in on them arguing about whether or not to throw us a surprise baby shower a week or so ago.”

Lovely.
“And didn’t see fit to tell me?
Any
of you?”

“Your mother wanted to confront you.” His eyes remained steady on hers. “I forbade it.”

“Why?”

Frustration turned the corners of his lips. With the tone of a man who was never expected to explain himself, he returned, “Because you were already fighting morning sickness and under so much stress at work. I didn’t want you to end up in the hospital.”

Ginger huffed. “Which I did anyway.”

“Unfortunately.”

Ginger stared at him, wondering how everything could turn so awful, so fast. Hands knotted at her sides, she moved closer. “So all this time, the three of you were—what?—humoring me.”

He glared down at her, said mildly, “Protecting you. And yes, we were.”

Tears misted her eyes. “At your insistence,” she clarified.

His jaw set. “It’s my job, as your husband.”

She spun away from him, overcome with a horrible sense of déjà vu. “It’s your job to tell me the truth!” she cried.

“And I am.”

“Now!”

Another silence fell, even more fraught with tension than the last. There was suddenly so much wrong with their situation, Ginger didn’t know where to start. Her gaze jerked back up to his eyes.

She supposed the best place to start was where the trouble began. “I can’t accept your mother’s job offer.”

Acting as if this were all hormones again, instead of a fundamental breakdown in their relationship, he stared at her in weary resignation. “Why not?”

Ginger went back to what had upset her at the end of her conversation with her own mother that day. The willful deception that had paved the way for the entire past month. “Because,” she sighed, irritated she had to explain this to him, too, “your mother just asked because she thinks our marriage is a real one.”

His expression grew stonier.

“I mean, she does, doesn’t she?” Ginger persisted. “You didn’t tell our mothers
that part
without me, did you?”

“No, of course not.”

“So they think we’ve made a real, lifetime commitment to each other?”

“I assume so, yes.”

“Then we have to set the record straight,” she reiterated, going back to what she’d been trying to tell him over dinner. “And explain to them that our marriage is nothing but a temporary arrangement for business reasons.”

He folded his arms across his chest. “What if I want it to be more than that?”

Tension knotted her gut. In an effort to gain control, she returned to her usual businesslike attitude. “You know our agreement,” she told him.

And she knew her promise to
herself,
to never again be in a relationship where she was humored and betrayed, the way she’d been in her first marriage.

Rand stood his ground. “I know our
initial
agreement.”

Meaning what? The fact they’d become closer gave him license to do whatever he pleased as far as she was concerned? “Our marriage is not a forever kind of thing,” she reminded him stubbornly, refusing to delude herself into believing otherwise.

His face took on a brooding expression. “You’re saying you still want a divorce as soon as we have the baby?”

Did she?
In a perfect world, no. But he had more than proved this wasn’t utopia. Not even close. She had to be practical. If she stayed, he would break her heart. And maybe their baby’s heart, too. Swallowing the lump in her throat, Ginger ran a weary hand through her hair. “I’m saying I’m tired of the pretense. I don’t want to walk around every day feeling like a liar. Because that’s not who I am. And it’s not who you are, either, Rand.” That much she knew.

He exhaled roughly, looking as ticked off as she felt. “You’re right about that.”

Their anguished glances meshed and held. “Then you understand we have to tell our parents the truth about why we really got married, that we were never as wildly and passionately in love as we pretended.”

He lifted a brow, challenging, “Or ever will be for that matter?”

Ginger didn’t know what to say to that.

In the end it didn’t matter.

Rand simply looked at her, a world of hurt and disappointment in his eyes. “Point made,” he said quietly.

And then he walked out.

Chapter Fourteen

“And that’s it?” Michelle asked from across the law firm conference table two days later, her expression inscrutable. “Rand just grabbed his laptop and left?”

Ginger nodded and settled even deeper into her chair, aware she hadn’t felt this miserable in her entire life. “I haven’t seen or heard from him since. Hence, I wanted to let you know we would be coming to you for a marriage dissolution instead of a marriage contract.”

Suddenly she paused. “You don’t look surprised.” Ginger had half expected the happily married attorney to give her a lecture on sticking with it and seeing the problems through. Instead, Michelle was calmly making notes on the yellow legal pad in front of her.

“So what was it like before the big blow-up the two of you had?” Michelle asked.

“Great, actually,” Ginger admitted, a little mystified about that, too. How was it that things had gone from so wonderful, to so bad, that quickly?

Calmly, Michelle continued to take notes. “You were working on the terms of your marriage contract?”

Ginger nodded. “Trying to anticipate—and solve—any problems that could possibly come up in the future. Not that there were many in the present. We just naturally seemed to click as roommates. And lovers.”

Wow, had they ever clicked as lovers,
she amended silently.

“But then what happened in the bedroom had never been the issue between us,” she continued, aware she needed a sounding board, and the quietly analytical attorney in front of her was as good as any. “That was good from start to finish.”

Michelle looked up. “And Rand seemed happy then, too?”

“Very. I mean, I’d never seen him so relaxed and...content, I guess. Before we hooked up, he was always using his passion to fight for one environmental issue or another. Then, when we realized the baby was on the way, everything sort of changed.” She sighed. “Our focus shifted more to each other and making things work than on either of our business goals. And once that happened...everything just seemed to fall into place.”

“Even when you had small differences of opinion on the actual terms of the marriage contract, the two of you were trying to hammer out?”

“That’s correct.” Ginger exhaled. “As furious as I was with him over not telling me that our mothers knew we were expecting a baby, I never thought he’d decide to end things just like that.” Ginger studied the levelheaded family law lawyer. “But you’re not at all surprised, are you?”

Michelle put her pen down. “You want me to be frank?”

“I do.”

“You and Rand were and are the exception to the rule.”

“In what way?”

“Most people enter into marriage thinking it’s going to be some fantastic fairytale. They don’t understand—or want to understand—what you and Rand intuited from the get-go. That marriage
is
a business, albeit a very personal one.”

Ginger blinked, still listening intently.

“In either situation, you first decide to throw in together. Then you draw up the contract. When, how, where you’re going to proceed. The day you get married compares to the day you go to the secretary of state to actually register your new business.”

Ginger reflected on the official legal start to their new venture. “That was an incredibly happy moment.”

Michelle smiled. “It is for everyone because it’s the beginning of the honeymoon period.”

That had been wonderful, too.

“But then the real work begins.” Michelle sobered. “Bylaws for the business—or in your case, the actual terms of the postnup and marriage contract—are drawn up. And let me tell you, no one ever agrees about those. It’s always a difficult process. There are always subtle but significant differences of opinion. In business, quarrels concern how much to spend on advertising or how much staff to hire...”

She cleared her throat. “However, in marriage, it’s usually an emotional issue, such as whether or not you should quit pretending to be in love and tell your families the real reason you got married when you did. Or whether Rand should have told you the moms had guessed you were pregnant, instead of moving to protect you the way he thought was right in that moment.”

It was clear Ginger and Rand had serious disagreements about those issues. But also true that their quarrel didn’t seem as significant today as it had when it had occurred.

Ginger studied the happily married woman opposite her. “You’re saying I should cut Rand some slack?”

Because Rand’s gallantry is one of the things I love best about him? One of the things I’ve come to count on the most?

The savvy attorney smiled knowledgeably. “I’m saying that whether in business or marriage, everyone always plans for when things go wrong.” She paused to let her words sink in. “No one ever plans for what happens when everything goes
right
.”

* * *

“S
O
IT
’
S
TRUE
?” Josie said to Rand when he tracked her down at the Boerne ranch two days after her visit to the cottage. He could see that surveying and staking was already under way. “You’re ending another marriage?”

Rand scowled at his mother. “I was hoping you’d give me some tender loving care.”

“Nope. Fresh out of that.”

“Seriously?” he quipped.

Josie looked him squarely in the eye. “I’m not going to sugarcoat it for you, son. You’re being an idiot.”

Rand followed his mother over to her pickup. “She’s not ever going to love me, Mom.”

Josie grabbed a couple of bottles of electrolyte drinks from the cooler, and handed one to him. “Do you love her?”

What difference did it make? Rand wondered as he worked the cap off and took a long, thirsty swallow.

His mom quenched her thirst, too, then continued looking at him the way she had when he’d brought home a note from school saying he had misbehaved in some fashion. She had always wanted an explanation from him first, before passing judgment. She wanted one now, too.

Rand exhaled in frustration. “We were supposed to see our family law attorney today to hammer out the final details of our postnup and marriage contract. The appointment was made weeks ago.”

“Okay. And...?”

“Ginger sent me a text saying she was planning to attend without me, and that when she was there she was going to let Michelle know where things stood.”

“Which is where?”

“I don’t know. Over?”

Josie arched a brow. “Shouldn’t you be asking her that instead of me?”

“As you know, she’s pregnant.”

“So?” his mom asked.

“I don’t want to argue with her. Or upset her.”

Josie rolled her eyes. “And she couldn’t possibly be upset now, with the two of you not speaking to each other.”

Rand returned the sarcasm with equal vigor. “Is there a point to this cockeyed lecture?”

An indignant sniff. “I want to know why you aren’t at that meeting, too.”

“Because I do not want to go over there and be put in a position where I have to defend myself for doing what was right in the first place.”

“I see. So, bottom line, you’re afraid Ginger might disagree with you in front of the attorney, and hurt your feelings?”

Why did his mother persist in misunderstanding the entire situation, as well as his motives? “Because I’m—”

“Afraid?”

“—pretty damn sure that Ginger is going to want to continue our marriage only as a means to an end. And while I might have thought it was an acceptable idea in the first place, I don’t anymore. Hence, I’m not going to pretend everything is right as rain, and drag out a union that is bound to end in another colossal failure.” Sighing roughly, he raked a hand through his hair. “I’m not like you and Dad and my brothers. I’m not good at figuring out who to spend the rest of my life with, Mom.”

His outburst was met with thoughtful silence. Finally his mom tilted her head and probed gently. “I’m interested. How did you come to that particular conclusion?”

Rand grimaced. “Easy. I married one woman who wanted me to give her everything money could buy.”

“And when you didn’t, that marriage ended, rightly so. Although had you asked me, I would have told you from the get-go she was a fortune-hunter.”

Rand turned a glance skyward and pleaded for patience. When he finally had it, he looked back at his mother. “Then I married a second woman—”

“Who doesn’t want your money or even any sort of family nepotism when it comes to her career, either.”

Rand paused to decipher that. “Ginger turned you down?”

Josie nodded. “In an email. She said as much as she would love to work with and learn from me, she couldn’t in good conscience accept a job offered her only because of family connections that were going to end anyway.”

His spirits plummeted yet again. “Did you disagree with her? Try to get her to change her mind?”

“No.”

He squinted. “Why not, if you believe in her?”

His mother let out a reluctant breath. “Because Ginger is right. If you two don’t work this out, she would never be happy working with me.”

So much for the pep talk he’d wanted, even if it had been as off-base as the rest of his life. He folded his arms in front of him. “Well, we’re not going to work it out.”

Another contemplative pause. “What makes you so sure of that?”

Same reason as always
. “Because Ginger’s elusive to the core.”

“Independent to a fault.” Josie helped heap on the criticism.

“She’s never going to let me give her anything,” Rand railed. “Not commitment or security or—” He stopped.

His mother smiled and, guessing exactly where he’d been going with that rant, delivered her final blow.

“Love?”

* * *

G
INGER
WAS
BACK
at the cottage, trying to figure out what her next step was going to be, when a knock sounded at the door.

Rand stood on the other side of the screen door.

He looked resolute. Handsome. Serious.

Her heart turned over in her chest at the sight of him standing there, clad in one of the button-down Oxford-cloth shirts she had once enjoyed wearing so much.

“Hey,” she said softly before she could stop herself or think of a better opening to what she wanted and needed to say.

He smiled at her and, lips set stubbornly, opened the door and strode inside the honeymoon cottage where they’d begun their married life. Languorously, he crossed to her side. “How did your appointment with Michelle go?”

It was a simple question. Packed with emotion, beneath the masculine reserve.

She let her glance caress the long muscular legs, encased in soft faded denim, his equally worn boots. Remembering how much she loved every part of his strong, tall body, she returned her gaze upward, over the hard musculature of his chest and neck, to his face.

She took a bolstering breath. “I wanted to talk to you about that.” Wanted to do a lot of things, in fact.

Another flicker of indiscernible emotion appeared in his midnight-blue eyes. He came closer, wrapped an arm around her waist, then put a silencing finger to her lips and said gruffly, “First, I need to say a few things.”

Ginger splayed her hands across his chest. “Okay.”

He looked at her with sincerity and regret. “I haven’t been honest with you. So in a way, you’re right. I have disrespected you this whole time by not leveling with you.”

It helped to have him admit that, even as the knowledge filled her with fear. Ignoring the sudden wobbliness of her knees, Ginger urged, “Go on.”

“I know what I said about it being only a temporary, heat-of-the-moment kind of thing the first time we landed in bed together.”

She had pretended the same.

“But the truth is,” Rand confided hoarsely, gazing into her eyes, “I never wanted a no-strings, easygoing affair with you. I was just humoring you, and telling you what I thought you wanted to hear.”

Her heart clenched. “As a means to an end.”

“Maybe.” He paused, reflecting. A mixture of mischief and irony turned up the corners of his lips. “Because I did want to see you again and I figured downplaying what had happened between us was the only way that was going to happen.”

His deadpan humor was infectious. “You’re probably right about that,” Ginger returned dryly. She’d been shaken to the core by the intensity of the passion they’d felt. Still was.

Rand tenderly cupped her face in his large hands. “But mostly it was because I let my pride and my fear of failing at another relationship get in the way.”

Ginger tipped her head up to his. “I’ve been apprehensive about putting myself out there again, too. Which is,” she explained, “the only reason I ever considered a continuous string of one-night stands with you. Because I was afraid to look any more forward than the moment we were in.”

“But the truth is—” he admitted, his voice a sexy rumble “—from the very first time I set eyes on you, I knew in my gut that I was never going to be satisfied with that. I’m a one-and-only-one-woman kind of a man. And the one woman I want in my life is you, Ginger Rollins-McCabe.”

Tears slipped down her cheeks as she thought about how much time they had lost, how abandoned she’d felt the past couple of days. “Then why didn’t you tell me?”

He searched her face with quiet intensity. “Because I knew how much you prized your independence.”

“Maybe not so much anymore.”

He shushed her again. “I’m not finished.” His voice caught. “You’ve got to let me get this out.”

Her throat aching with pent-up emotion, she nodded.

“I don’t want to end our marriage,” he said, flattening a hand on her spine and bringing her closer. “And it’s not because we’re likely to be taken more seriously in business if we stay hitched, or because it’s what our families want, or even more importantly, because a two-parent home will be good for our baby...or any other children we may also choose to have—”

She grinned at the realization he was thinking ahead, again.

“It’s because there is no other woman in the entire world for me. It’s because,” he continued in a gruffly tender tone that lit her soul on fire, “you bring a joy and a contentment and an excitement to my life in a way that no one ever has before. I love you, Ginger Rollins, with all my heart.” He bent his head and kissed her sweetly. “And I have from the first moment we hooked up.”