The Widow of Saunders Creek (22 page)

“Is everything okay, Sam?”

“That air conditioner was the first thing my husband ever installed.” She smiled. “He was a terrible handyman. I have no idea how Eli ever became so good at working with his hands. But his father was livid at the thought of paying extra money just to have someone install it after how much it cost to purchase the unit in the first place.”

Now I got it. “So that’s why you can’t bear the thought of letting it go.”

She nodded. “It feels like I’m throwing him away.” She waved her thought aside. “I know that’s silly.”

“It’s not silly. I’m sure if you explained it to Eli …”

She offered a tiny, crooked smile. “It’s been fixed so many times the repair guys won’t even come out. That’s why I’ve had to get Eli to do it the last couple of years. It’s time to let it go.”

I couldn’t argue with that.

“Can you gather up the herbs and put them in the refrigerator, please?” Sam asked. “Aunt Trudy will pitch a fit if I let her plants wither.”

“Aunt Trudy grows them?”

“Yes.” She smiled. “She’s an expert at using herbs for healing and whatnot.”

It was the “whatnot” that gave me pause. Sam must have noticed my hesitance. “What’s bothering you, Corrie?”

Carefully, I gathered the tender plants and placed them in a bin. “I’m just surprised you would encourage her. Eli is so against the folk witchcraft that I guess I assumed you felt the same way.”

She narrowed her gaze, and I had an uncomfortable feeling I’d
offended her. “You have to understand how things are in this part of the country,” she said. “Within families there are mediums and witches, who are usually one and the same. But not always. There are healers; some rely on magic, some on the name of Jesus. Christians, for the most part, condemn the magic as evil, though family members like Aunt Trudy swear her gift is from God. She considers her calling and Eli’s calling to be from the same source. It offends her that he is openly opposed to witchcraft. Even so, we are family, and we love each other. And as the Bible says, ‘Love covers a multitude of sins.’ ”

“I see.”

Sam seemed to understand my bewilderment with the contradictory relationships. “We know that we don’t wrestle flesh and blood.” She walked toward me, her voice kind. “Aunt Trudy is my blood. I would no more turn my back on her than I would Eli. She isn’t born again, and that keeps me in constant prayer.”

I nodded. “I can understand family loyalty.” My hippie dad flashed across my mind. Even though he’d disappointed us over and over when we were growing up, I knew Lola and I both wanted to see him. We’d welcome being part of his life. “We don’t choose the way our family behaves. Only how we respond to their behavior.”

She sent me a wink. “Exactly.”

“What if she did get angry, though?” I asked. “Or someone like her?”

“In what sense?”

“I mean, if she decided to sock a spell on someone or something. I don’t know. I’ve never really been around this sort of thing.”

“Are you worried about Aunt Trudy? Has something scared you?”

I shook my head. “Not really. I just wondered.”

She pursed her lips, as though trying to formulate just the right response. “We know we don’t wrestle flesh and blood, so we don’t fight spiritual battles with physical weapons.”

I was lost already. Sam seemed to notice and smiled. “Were you raised in church, Corrie?”

“Yes, but no one talked about this stuff. At least not to me.” I gave her a sheepish grin. “I stopped going when I was a teenager.”

“All right. Then this is what I want you to remember. No matter what you see on TV or hear in those movies with exorcisms and such, there is one Name that’s above all that. And if you believe in Him, you have all the power you need to resist the devil and his demons.”

“You mean Jesus, right?”

“There. You said it. Don’t you feel better already?”

Honestly, I wasn’t sure how I felt. “Well, let’s hope I never have to put it to the test.”

“If you’re alive and a believer, you can be sure you will in some form or another.”

“Well,” I said, “I guess I’ll get to those shelves now.” I moved away to restock the natural shampoo and conditioner. There were no customers right then, so Sam followed me. Thankfully, the topic of conversation changed.

“How is your sister’s visit going?” she asked.

“Good. She went to a concert with Joe last night and plans to go to dinner tonight.”

A smile touched Sam’s lips. “Ah, the hearts that have been smashed in two by that man.”

I returned her smile with a dubious twist. “Trust me. He’s met his match in Lola.”

She looked at me, her eyes pensive, studying me for a split second. “How are you doing, Corrie?”

“Fine,” I replied, my voice small.

“I was married to Eli’s dad for more than thirty years before he passed away.” She sighed, and somehow I understood her need to hang on to that air conditioner for so long. “If you need to talk,” she said, “I’d be happy to listen. No one understands the pain of losing the man you love like another widow.”

My instinct was to thank her politely and tell her I would call on her if I needed to talk. Instead, words rushed out of me like water from a faucet. “How do you learn to live without him? At the end of the day, Jarrod and I always connected. Even when Jarrod was deployed, there was almost always an opportunity to speak, at least a couple of times a week, even when he was in more remote places. That’s what I miss the most. The talks we had.”

She nodded. “I don’t know if you ever stop missing the moments only the two of you shared. But I can say that the pain of the loss eases over time. And I suspect for a young woman like you, another love may eventually find you.”

I wondered briefly if she was thinking of Eli. The fact was that I liked him a lot. So much that I felt guilty sometimes—when I thought about how warm and good and strong his arms felt the night of the tornado. Or when I recalled the moments we laughed together, or the way he had given me a canvas and paints and red velvet cupcakes, as if he understood that inside I was ready to live again.

“I don’t know,” I said. “Right now the thought of loving again makes me feel like I’m being unfaithful to Jarrod.”

The door opened and she turned. My stomach tightened as Ava Lancaster breezed in and waved. “Hi, Miss Sam,” she called. “Corrie. Nice to see you again.”

I returned her greeting but turned back to Sam.

Sam waved at her. “You’re back so soon? This is an unexpected surprise.”

“Momma’s been under the weather since middle of last week. Doc says she’s got bronchitis and a sinus infection, poor thing.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Sam said. “Is she better?”

“On the mend, anyway. But she’s been fretting over getting ready for summer solstice business, so I took a few vacation days to lend a hand.”

“Glad to hear it. I’ll be right with you, hon,” Sam said. She patted my arm and dropped her tone so that her next words were for my ears alone. “I can understand your guilt. But when your heart is ready to love again, you’ll have to be strong enough to accept it and release the guilt.” A soft smile touched her lips. “Because trust me, honey, Jarrod loved you, and he wouldn’t want you to pine away for him the rest of your life because of misguided loyalty.”

She went to Ava, leaving me to sort out her words. I could see the wisdom in what she said. The Jarrod I knew and loved for eight years would never want me to be alone. At least that’s what he told me. My mind returned to the talks we’d had before each dangerous deployment. Lying in each other’s arms, we hated to sleep, knowing that soon after sunrise he would leave and be gone for months on end. “Remember,” he
would say, “if something happens to me, don’t be alone, Corrie. Don’t make yourself into a martyr for love. You have to get married again, have a bunch of kids. Name at least one of the boys after me, maybe two of them, so you’ll never forget me.”

We would laugh then, and I would tell him to shut up and promise to come home or I wasn’t letting him go. And he would say okay.

He only broke his promise once.

Even though I knew Corrie wouldn’t be off work until two, I had been watching the clock all day, waiting for her to arrive. At a few minutes before two, she pulled up in front of the chow hall in a cloud of dust. She was earlier than I’d expected, but the surprise was a pleasant one.

She wore cutoffs with a pair of flip-flops and a man’s old blue button-down shirt. How could anyone be that gorgeous in such a dressed-down outfit? She wasn’t wearing short shorts either. The cutoffs were midthigh and modest, and I appreciated her consideration. It was difficult enough being a single red-blooded male in a world where beautiful women didn’t have much of a sense of modesty and either purposefully or through ignorance gave no consideration to their effect on men.

“Hey,” I said. I knew I had a stupid grin on my face, but I was glad enough to see her finally arrive that I didn’t care. “You’re early.”

She nodded, hopping out of the Jeep. “Your mom’s AC pooped out on us again. She’s getting a new one.”

Guilt clutched at me. “Why didn’t she call me?”

Reaching into the back of the Jeep, she took the slightest second to give me a knowing glance. “She didn’t want to bother you again so soon.”

I reached for my breast pocket and grabbed for my phone. “I best give her a call.”

Something crossed her expression, but she didn’t voice her opinion.

“What?” I said. As I slid the phone back into the pocket, I realized she had gallons of paint in both hands. I reached for two. “What’s with the look?”

“There was no look. Where do you want these? Your mom had me stop by her place and pick them up for you. There’s at least fifteen gallons, which I don’t think we’ll need.”

“Leave the ones for the cabins in the Jeep, and you can drive down the path. No sense making several trips carrying heavy paint.” I motioned to the ones in my hands and jerked my chin to the building. “These will go in the chow hall.”

She set her paint back in the Jeep. “Good idea.”

“So why don’t you think I should call my mom about the air conditioner?” Call me a bulldog, but I couldn’t let it go.

“Good grief,” she said with a laugh.

“You started it.”

“I didn’t say a word, you crazy.”

“You gave me a look.”

She sighed and shook her head as she climbed back into the Jeep. “Are there brooms and buckets in the cabins?”

“First boys’ cabin,” I said, “the one you toured first last night. I didn’t know where you wanted to start.”

“That works.” Her beautiful blue eyes gleamed with humor as she stared at me. “Okay, here’s the thing, since you won’t let it go. Your mom is a young, capable businesswoman. She can buy herself an air conditioner and have it installed without your help.”

The words struck me, and my defenses rose. But she raised her
hand and went on before I could respond. “I think you’re a great son, Eli. But we women are capable of making decisions too.” She smiled and I relaxed. “Your mom will always need you, especially as the years go by, but you’ll be doing her a favor to let her do what she can do for as long as she can do it. She’s barely sixty, I bet.”

“Sixty-one, smarty.”

“See? Like I said. She’s still young, and take it from another widow—doing for oneself is empowering.” She rolled her eyes. “And it’s only an air conditioner. She’s not selling out and moving to Mexico to live on the beach.”

“Well, thanks for putting it in perspective.”

“No problem.” She laughed. “It’s a gift.”

I smiled at her. “All right. I won’t butt in.”

“Good. Now I’m going to go work for my supper. You do remember that you’re springing for supper, right?”

“I do. Ham sandwiches okay?”

“Sure. Just don’t tell my Jewish grandmother.”

I laughed. For someone raised with a silver spoon in her mouth, Corrie was the lowest-maintenance woman I’d ever met. “I’m kidding. I didn’t figure you’d feel like going out after painting all day, but I have a couple of filets marinating, and I made shrimp kabobs.”

“Oh, wow. Now I’m starving.”

I shook my head. “No work, no eat. See you later.”

“Fine. And you should know my grandmother is all Texan, which, as you know, is all the nationality anyone needs.” She gave me a little half wave and drove off toward the cabins.

I watched the little cloud rise up around the wheels, knowing my
heart was beginning to lean toward her a little too much. If I wasn’t careful, I could ruin what was the promise of something really great between us by moving too quickly.

It felt good to be needed. Sam had hired me at the store, but I had come to think she did it more to be sure I didn’t bury myself at the house than out of any real need for my stellar salesmanship. Of which I had none. As I worked, I could hear the sound of Eli’s truck as he rounded up branches and other debris blown around by the tornado to be burned. Something about working together on this project made me feel a connection to him I’d never felt with anyone besides Jarrod, and it scared me a little. After my talk with Sam earlier, I had to wonder, were my feelings for Eli growing deeper than friendship? And if so, what did that say about my need to discover if Jarrod was trying to communicate with me?