The Wild Hog Murders (27 page)

“Maybe we won’t have to worry about him for much longer,” Rhodes said.

“We can hope.”

“Hope what?” Alton Boyd asked as he joined them.

“Hope we all sound good on the radio,” Rhodes said. “Are you ready to go?”

“You bet. I turned on the radio when I left home, and I told Donna Lou not to turn it off till the Milton Munday show was over.”

Donna Lou was Boyd’s wife. She was as good with animals as Boyd was and liked them just as much.

“You mean she’s not a Milton Munday fan?” Rhodes asked.

“She’d rather watch TV,” Boyd said, “but I told her I was gonna be on the air. She wouldn’t want to miss out on that.”

“I don’t blame her,” Rhodes said. “We might as well get on out there. We don’t want them to start without us.”

“We sure don’t,” Boyd said. “I never been on the radio before.”

Garver got out of Ruth’s cruiser and walked over. He looked anxious rather than eager.

“What are we waiting for?” he asked.

“Not a thing,” Rhodes said. “Let’s go.”

*   *   *

The setup at the Chandlers’ place was simple enough. The KCLR van that carried the sound equipment was parked at one end of the circular drive in front of the house. Mikey Burns’s red Solstice was parked behind the van. Rhodes stopped behind the Solstice, and Ruth Grady was right behind him.

A table was set up at the side of the van, and an awning stretched from the top of the van to shade it. The side of the van was open, and Rhodes could see the broadcasting equipment inside with the sound man. Burns and Munday sat at the table. Wireless microphones and earphones were in front of them, along with a couple of notebooks and a digital clock with large numbers. The earphones were the old-fashioned kind that covered the ears.

Janice Chandler sat beside Burns, and Andy was next to her. Janice didn’t have on a bonnet, and Rhodes got a good look at her. She wasn’t wearing any makeup, and she didn’t look young this time. She looked twice Andy’s age, and maybe she was.

Everybody had a mug of coffee, but nobody was drinking any. They must have been nervous about going on the air.

Burns and Munday looked a little surprised when Rhodes and Boyd walked up, with Ruth and Garver close behind.

“What’s going on, Sheriff?” Munday asked. “I didn’t know you were bringing a posse.”

Ah, that quick radio wit. Rhodes was impressed.

“I thought these people might have something to contribute,” Rhodes said. “Alton Boyd’s our animal control officer, Ruth Grady’s a deputy, and Ed Garver’s a hog hunter, so they all fit right into your topic for today.”

Munday didn’t look convinced. “We don’t have enough mics for everybody. We’ll have to swap around.”

“That won’t be a problem, will it?”

“I guess not,” Munday said. He gave Burns an accusing look. “You should’ve told me about this.”

Burns pleaded ignorance and shifted the blame where it belonged. “Sheriff Rhodes neglected to tell me that he was bringing anybody with him.”

“I didn’t think it mattered,” Rhodes said. “I just wanted to be sure we had the subject covered. Is there coffee for everybody?”

“We have some in the van,” Munday said.

“I don’t drink it myself,” Rhodes said. “Anybody want a cup?”

Nobody did, or at least nobody admitted it.

“How long before the program starts?” Boyd asked.

“We still have a few minutes,” Munday said after a glance at the digital clock. “Let me tell you how I’ll handle things. Commissioner Burns will be first. I’ll ask him about the hog situation, and after he fills us in, I’ll move to the Chandlers. When they have their say, I’ll do some commentary. After that, we’ll get to you and your friends, Sheriff. How does that sound?”

“Sounds all right to me,” Rhodes said. “This is a dialogue, right?”

“Right,” Munday said. “We want everyone to have a say.”

“So we’ll have time to respond to your commentary.”

“That depends.” Munday patted a notebook. “We have commercials to do, and we don’t want to make any of the sponsors unhappy.”

Burns laughed. No one else did.

“This isn’t a solemn occasion,” Munday said. “We’re here to have fun.”

“I’m sure we will,” Rhodes said. “Well, some of us will. How about it, Alton?”

“You bet. I’m ready to get on the air.”

Munday got some kind of signal from the man in the van, and he put on his headphones. Burns followed suit. The man in the van started a countdown.

Rhodes hadn’t noticed a little bar that sat on the front of the table, but he did when it flashed red letters that read
ON THE AIR.

“Good morning, Blacklin County,” Munday said. “Welcome to the first hour of the Milton Munday show, coming to you live from Janice and Andy Chandler’s animal shelter. We’re brought to you today by your friends and neighbors at Tacker Auto Supply, Wagner’s Feed and Seed, and Billy Lee’s pharmacy.”

With that, Munday launched into a pitch for auto supplies that featured the folksy personal approach. Munday himself had been in the store only a couple of days ago, he said, in dire need of a new alternator for his car.

“And do you know what? Good old Doug Tacker himself was there, and he not only sold me the alternator but he told me where to take my car to get the alternator put on. I swear, folks, you just can’t go wrong if you visit Doug when you need any kind of auto parts. Why, he’s got it all, and more.”

Munday went on in that vein for so long that Rhodes wasn’t sure there’d be any time for the guests, but after a while Munday stopped his praise of Doug Tacker and said, “Our first guest today is Commissioner Mikey Burns, the man who keeps the trees trimmed, the ditches clean, and the county roads fit to travel. He’s going to tell us about a big problem in this county, one we’ve talked about on this program before.” He lowered his voice. “Wild hogs.” His voice returned to its normal tone. “Is there anything we can do about this menace, Commissioner Burns?”

Burns talked about the menace, with, Rhodes thought, some exaggeration. Make that a lot of exaggeration.

“Is there anything that we can do?” Munday asked, and Burns told about his wonderful plan.

Rhodes tuned him out. He watched the Chandlers, who sat there with tight-lipped disapproval, waiting their turn. They had to wait quite a while because after Burns finished, Munday got started on the miracles of modern medicine that were wrought daily at Billy Lee’s pharmacy, which Munday had also visited only a couple of days earlier right after his stop at the auto parts store. No wonder the sponsors, not to mention the KCLR station manager, loved him.

When he was talking, Burns handed the mic to Janice Chandler. He didn’t offer her the headphones, so Rhodes supposed she could do without them.

Munday finished his spiel and introduced Janice.

“Here’s a woman who’s come into Blacklin County and spent a fortune on a big spread in the country,” Munday said. “Her name’s Janice Chandler, and she’s taking care of animals that don’t have anybody else to help them. That’s good, right? Everybody loves cats and dogs. They’re cute, and they’re cuddly, and dogs are a man’s best friend. Cats are a little snooty, but they keep us company and make us feel good.

“It’s not just dogs and cats out here at the Chandlers’ shelter, though. It’s bigger animals, too. Like hogs. Wild hogs. They’re not cute, and they’re not cuddly. You’ve heard Commissioner Burns’s take on them, but Ms. Chandler feels differently about those hogs. If they’re wounded, and if she can get to them, she’ll help them. She’s even protective of the ones running loose all around us. Ms. Chandler, how can you justify such a thing?”

Ms. Chandler didn’t look pleased at the question. “I thought we were going to talk about the good work my son and I are doing here, not about feral hogs.”

“The hogs are part of the work, aren’t they? Or maybe you don’t regard your work with them as being good. It’s something my listeners would like to know about.”

Andy stood up and loomed. His size made it easy for him. Rhodes took a step toward him, but he wasn’t needed. Janice raised a hand, and Andy sat back down.

“All right, Milton,” Janice said. Her voice was calm and level. “This is how it is. We care about animals here, and we care
for
animals here. It doesn’t matter to us what kind of animals come here or are brought here. We take care of them. We don’t have any prejudices. Does that answer your question?”

“You have a fine accepting attitude,” Munday said, “but why save animals that other folks here in the county regard as a menace to society?”

Rhodes remembered a movie from a long time ago. He wondered if Munday had seen it. Probably not.

“The hogs have as much right to live as any other animal,” Janice said.

“Commissioner Burns might not agree with that.”

“That’s his right.”

“We have to break for a commercial now,” Munday said, “but we’ll be right back and hear how Sheriff Dan Rhodes feels about this issue.”

Munday took off his headphones and laid them on the table. Burns followed his lead. Rhodes assumed that the commercial this time was prerecorded. He didn’t know how long it would run, so he went over and took Janice’s place in the chair.

“I’m leaving,” she said as she stood up. “Let’s go, Andy.”

“You should wait,” Rhodes said. “You might be interested in my opinion.”

“I don’t think so.”

“At least give me a chance.”

Janice looked at Andy, who shrugged.

“All right. We’ll stay, but I think we were ambushed.”

She glared at Munday, who gave her a complacent smile in return.

Munday got some kind of signal from the man in the trailer and put his headphones back on. Rhodes took the pair that Burns had used, hoping that the commissioner didn’t have any infectious ear problems.

“We’re back, friends,” Munday said, “and before I talk to the High Sheriff, I want to say a good word on behalf of my good buddy Wash Walker over there at Walker’s Feed and Seed. I know he’s listening right now because he always has the radio at the store tuned to KCLR when I stop by, and he goes in early every day so he can be ready and waiting if someone needs a sack of feed before going to work.”

There was more in that vein, but Rhodes had stopped listening. He was thinking about what he was going to say if Munday asked him the right questions. He was counting on Munday’s doing it. After all, Munday had ambushed Janice Chandler in a way, so he was just as likely to ambush Rhodes.

Or try to.

“You be sure to see Wash for all your feed and seed needs,” Munday said in concluding his commercial. “Now, as I promised you, our next guest is Sheriff Dan Rhodes. You probably know that Sheriff Rhodes is investigating a couple of murders that are tied directly to the wild hogs in Blacklin County, and now we’re going to find out why the killer is still on the loose. How about it, Sheriff?”

Rhodes grinned. He’d known he could count on Munday.

“How about what?” he asked.

“How about the killer that’s roaming the county? Why haven’t you put him behind bars? When are you going to make Blacklin County a safe place to live in again?”

Rhodes couldn’t resist having a little fun with Munday. He tried to sound puzzled by the questions. “You mean if I catch the killer, the hogs won’t be a menace anymore?”

“No, Sheriff, that’s not it. The hogs will still be a menace.”

“To society?” Rhodes asked.

Munday looked at Rhodes as if he might have begun to regret having invited him on the show.

“To all of us,” Munday said. “As is the killer that’s hiding who knows where. What are you doing about that?”

“I’ll tell you the truth,” Rhodes said. “I don’t think the killer is hiding.”

“You don’t? Where is he, then?”

“He’s closer than you think.”

“If you know where he is, Sheriff, why don’t you let us in on the secret?”

“All right,” Rhodes said. “I will. Do we have time before the next commercial?”

“Don’t worry about the commercial. Everybody will rest easier if they know the killer’s been caught.”

“I didn’t say he’s been caught. I said he’s closer than you think.”

“How close?” Munday asked.

“Close enough,” Rhodes said. He looked at Ed Garver. “He’s right here with us.”

Chapter 26

Munday looked stunned. His mouth opened, but no words came out.

Garver didn’t look happy, but he walked over to Rhodes, who stood up and handed him the mic.

Since Munday wasn’t using his mic and appeared to be speechless, Rhodes took it from the host’s hand.

“What’s going on here?” Mikey Burns asked. “Are you saying that Ed Garver’s the killer?”

“In case you didn’t hear that,” Rhodes said to the radio audience, “Commissioner Burns just asked if the next guest was the killer. The guest he’s talking about is Ed Garver, who works for our good friend Trey Allison at Allison’s Plumbing. If you have a stopped-up drain or a broken pipe, give old Trey a call. He’ll get somebody right out to solve your problem.”