The Winnowing Season (38 page)

Still, his loyalty to Rhoda kept him from telling Leah why they couldn’t see each other, regardless of the temptation to do otherwise.

He pulled onto the driveway. Rhoda was on the porch, and when she saw him, she walked out toward his truck. He turned down his radio, took a deep breath, and tried to exhale all his frustrations and desire to yell. After all, he wanted to keep his friendship with Rhoda. And his job.

But what he had with Leah was a friendship, not a marriage proposal. He knew the Amish were uptight about their boundaries, but he hadn’t expected Rhoda to be like that. He cut the engine, pocketed his keys, and opened the door. “Morning.”

“Good morning.”

Her eyes searched for signs of, well, something. Truth be told, he still didn’t want to look directly at her.

“Mind if we go to the barn to talk for a minute?”

“Sure.” He put his hands in his jacket pockets and followed Rhoda, telling himself not to be too upset regardless of what she had to say.

They had argued before. This disagreement didn’t have to damage anything between them, except, well, he hadn’t been hurt by what went on between them before. But this? It hurt.

Once in the barn office, she closed the door and sat on the edge of the desk. “Here’s the deal, Landon. I owe you an apology.”

He blinked. Whatever he had been expecting, an apology certainly wasn’t on the list. He studied her. “About?”

“Leah.”

“You’ve said that already. I get it. You don’t like being the bad guy and telling me to back off.”

“You’d think I would recognize when someone is intolerant of another person out of fear. People have reacted to me that way my whole life. But I didn’t see I was doing that very thing to you.” She appeared calm and focused, but he could tell she struggled to admit this. “I will go to Leah myself and tell her what I’ve done, but I wanted to talk to you first—just to be sure you’re okay with me setting the record straight.”

Landon realized his mouth was slightly agape, and he snapped it shut. All his anger, frustration, and indignation faded into the familiar aching sorrow that pierced him whenever he had to watch Arlan drive off with Leah.

“Are you saying I’m free to take Leah places and have her come to Granny’s?”

“Ya. It wasn’t fair to—”

“Wait.” Blood pumped against his ears, and his thoughts churned so fast that confusion swirled. “Really?”

She smiled. “I have some reservations, but yes.”

“What changed?”

“I hadn’t talked to Samuel or even my brother about it. When I shared my concerns with Samuel this morning, he didn’t agree with me. It seems he trusts God to be the mediator between you and Leah. Do you agree?” She drew a breath. “I mean, can you walk carefully with Leah, not trying to get your way, but seeking God’s?”

“Did she tell you we’d been going to church?”

“No. That’s good though, I suppose.” Rhoda closed her eyes, taut lines straining her features for a moment.

“You really are concerned about the doors I might open to her.”

She nodded. “Life is not as lax as you tend to take it, but Samuel is right. I need to trust God with Leah. Anyway, like I said, I can talk with Leah and say it was my fault.”

Landon considered her offer. With Leah’s sassy mouth, a little bit of a buffer might be nice, but he didn’t like other people speaking for him. “No, I can talk with her myself.”

She raised an eyebrow. “You sure? I don’t mind accepting the blame here.”

“I didn’t say I wasn’t going to blame you.” He offered a half grin.

A faint smile crossed her lips. “Fair enough. I think she’s inside. Samuel and I were hoping you and Leah would like to take us to see some dogs in Penobscot County. You know, maybe pack a picnic lunch and make an outing of it.” She grimaced. “I really am sorry for not being more cautious with my opinions.”

“Don’t go beating yourself up over this, Rhodes. Under all this stress, you were bound to make some bad calls.” He wanted to be some comfort to her. “And I’m glad Samuel’s willing to set you straight as needed.”

She smiled. “Are you saying somebody needs to?”

“Me, say that? Nah. I’ll let someone say it who doesn’t mind ticking you off.”

They looked at each other, then said in unison, “Samuel.”

They shared a laugh, and Landon was amazed at how good that felt. He had missed his friendship with Rhoda.

As they left the barn, his relief grew. It wouldn’t be easy telling Leah that he had chosen to wall her off without a fight. But he clung to the hope that she might, just might, want to be his friend again.

Leah took another dish from Phoebe and dried it, humming a song she had heard in the Protestant church she had visited with Landon.

“That’s a nice tune, ya?” Phoebe handed her another dripping plate.

Leah came out of her half-dazed state and took the plate. “Oh, sorry. I didn’t mean to. I know I shouldn’t …” If a song wasn’t in the
Ausbund
, the Amish hymnal, it wasn’t to be sung or hummed, especially in front of a member of the faith.

“Sounds good to me.” Phoebe passed her another wet plate.

Leah smiled. Phoebe wasn’t stuffy about God like Leah’s parents were.

“Good morning.” Landon’s greeting almost caused her to drop the plate.

She turned. He stood in the doorway to the kitchen, cap in hand, looking somewhat nervous or perturbed—perhaps a little of both.

“Good morning, Landon.” Phoebe rinsed another dish. “There are plenty of biscuits if you’d like some, and I can make some more eggs.”

Leah said nothing, but, oh, she had plenty that she
wanted
to say, starting with, “Hey, why don’t you like me anymore?” If they got a moment alone, she would ask him.

“Thanks, but I’m good this morning.” He looked at Leah for the first time since he’d told her they couldn’t go out anymore. What was he so anxious about? “I was wondering, actually, if I could borrow Leah for a minute.”

“If it’s me you want to talk to, it’s me you need to ask.” She turned to Phoebe. “I don’t mean to be disrespectful.”

Phoebe winked at her. “I know how you meant it.”

Phoebe’s constant cheerful attitude, and Rhoda’s steadfast patience with Jacob and her strength in the face of the legal issues, and Samuel’s continual growth into being a deeper, kinder man made Leah question whether she actually wanted to leave the faith or not. It had stability, and each person strove for godliness, which she’d come to admire.

Leah turned back to Phoebe, who nodded and smiled. A slight pang of remorse hit her at the thought that she always seemed to be leaving Phoebe
with extra chores and work. Nonetheless she handed over her towel and turned back to Landon.

She followed him through the living room and out the front door, grabbing her coat from the rack and slipping it on as they went. Hope of their clearing the air thumped in her heart. What was his excuse for behaving like a nitwit?

When he walked toward his truck, she balked. “Where are you going?”

“I thought we’d talk where it’s warm and private.”

“Well, you thought wrong.”

“You want to stand in the cold or maybe go to a greenhouse?”

“What do you want, Landon?”

“Fine. We’ll stand in the cold.” Landon grimaced, looking unsure of himself. “I’m not quite sure where to begin, but I guess I’ll start with saying Rhoda saw me bringing you home late one night and you sneaking back into the house. She came to me and said I had to stop doing that and I needed to put some distance between us.”

From the start Leah knew Rhoda would disapprove. Still, if Rhoda weren’t under such stress right now, Leah would march inside and have a heart-to-heart with her. A loud one. But Landon caved to Rhoda’s wishes without so much as telling Leah what was going on?

“So you just cut me off?” She snapped her fingers in his face. “And why didn’t you tell me what was going on? That makes you seem a little too cowardly to me.”

“Come on, Leah. Think about this. I’m the one who influenced Jacob to consider moving here, and he got everyone else on board. Now he’s gone. Rhoda’s troubles are mounting daily. Samuel is trying to hold all the pieces together. And me … Well, I was having too much fun sneaking around with you.
That
was the cowardly thing to do under the circumstances.”

Leah’s anger and hurt melted. How could she have been so stupid as to think Landon was as wishy-washy as Michael? “And now?”

The beginning of a smile tugged at his lips. “It seems that Samuel thinks you should make up your own mind about your friends.”

She couldn’t breathe. “He what?”

“He trusts us, Leah. Both of us. Which is a scarier thing than when we were sneaking around, because I don’t ever want to let him down. But that can’t keep me away now that I have permission to take you wherever we want to go.”

A grin spread across her face: Landon
liked
her!

Even better, he was a worthy friend to have.

“I want to see lighthouses.”

Landon leaned against his truck, looking more like himself than he had in weeks. “The lighthouses, huh?”

Oh, how she’d missed that smile.

He met her gaze. “I’m taking your brother and Rhoda on a road trip to look at a pair of dogs.” He pulled his keys from his pocket. “Would you go with us?”

“Well, duh.”

“Is that Amish for yes?”

She laughed. “Let’s say it is and use it as needed. Kumm.” She motioned for him. “Let’s get them rounded up. I want to go!”

It only took a few minutes to get everyone into Landon’s truck. Rhoda and Samuel were in the backseat, talking away. Her brother had changed so much since he had met Rhoda—and all in good ways. But as she watched them talk and laugh together, something nagged at her. Were the two of them getting a little too cozy with each other?

“Hey, guys.” Landon looked at Samuel and Rhoda in his rearview mirror. “Do you mind if I turn on the radio?”

“How about all instrumental music, something with cellos?” Rhoda asked.

“I have a satellite radio. I can find any kind of music.”

Leah took off her coat. What was it about Maine that made Amish folk so relaxed?

Leah and Landon wasted no time in catching up. She really liked him. But she wasn’t ready to make any major decisions about where her life was going. If Landon asked her out on a real date, would she need to say no? Still, she never again wanted to lose the privilege or freedom to be his friend.

But she needed time to figure out what she really wanted from her life—and a good friend beside her who understood what loyalty and freedom were all about.

THIRTY-EIGHT

Rhoda tiptoed down the stairs, unsure who might still be asleep since it was past six in the morning. The gentle light of dawn peeped in around the blinds.

The second week of March.

The worst winter months were behind them, and the daylight hours were growing longer. If the legal mess that held her captive could get straightened out, Jacob could come home. Wouldn’t that be reason to celebrate a lovely spring together?

She pushed opened the swinging doors, and Ziggy rushed to her. Zara lagged behind, being the shyer of the two dogs. Rhoda felt like a child when it came to these dogs, all happy and glowing just because they existed. They had bought them six days ago, and the dogs seemed to lift the thick, wet blanket of hopelessness and fear from her.

Samuel sat at the table, reading his newspaper and drinking coffee. His Bible, which she saw him with more and more as the days floated by, was near his elbow—closed. He had read it before he began on the paper.

He glanced up. “You finally slept in a bit.”

“I did, and it felt wonderful.” She knelt and patted Ziggy’s head. The black dog nuzzled her neck and wagged her tail. Zara stood to the side, patiently waiting her turn. Had Samuel planned to get these dogs because she needed something to help her through these tough times?

Rhoda snapped her fingers, and Zara took the cue and edged forward. “You ladies gotta stay in this morning. I promised Leah she could spend time with you today. You better watch out. I think she wants to try to teach you a trick or two.”

Samuel put his newspaper down and stood. “You do know these dogs just
heard ‘blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.’ ” He poured coffee into a clean mug, added cream and sugar, and stirred it.

Rhoda stood. “It’s all
you
ever hear when I talk.”

He held the cup out to her, a lazy smile on his lips. “And yet it hasn’t stopped you from talking to me.”

Suppressing a smile, she took a sip of the coffee, peering at him over the rim of the mug. In some ways, perhaps many, she still didn’t understand him. Because of that, they had almost walked away from each other and this farm. The thought of nearly severing all ties with him made her shudder.

She moved to the fireplace and warmed her back. When was Jacob going to call her … or even write? If she was arrested, would he come then?

But whatever Jacob chose to do in order to remain hidden, she knew Samuel wouldn’t abandon her. Somewhere along the line since she’d met him, Samuel had learned to accept and respect her. Not just her skills as a business partner, but
her
—quirks, magnetism for trouble, and all.