The Woman They Kept (20 page)

Gideon yawned. His eyelids were
beginning to droop and the sounds of conversation becoming a far off
buzz. A rough hand shook him as his head nodded forward.

“
Beer and stew taking
their toll on you?” Harold said. “It's pretty strong
for those who aren't used to it. Why don't I get you guys set up to
where you can sleep for the night?” He paused and motioned
between them. “Are you all...together? Do you want to share
a big room?”

Rolanda grabbed Gideon's arm.
“We're together,” she said.

“
I'll take a separate
room,” Leanin said, “I can sleep on the floor in the
living room here.”

“
Nonsense, dear,”
Rhea said. “We've got another room. It's not much, but it
has a bed in it. Not a very big bed, but it should work just fine.”

They took Leanin down to her
room first. The back hallways made the house much larger than
Gideon originally would have assumed, branching off in several
directions. The walls felt warm to the touch.

“
Natural heat,”
Harold said, motioning to the wall. “We're underground, the
earth's heating the place. Neat, huh?”

They had to duck to get in the
door to Leanin's bedroom. The walls were decorated with painted
animals, a hand-carved rocking horse was in one corner and a rag
doll placed upon it. Harold cleared his throat. “Sorry about
the toys. Waiting on someone else in Meadowood to have a kid so we
can give them to 'em.”

Leanin stood tall and placed a
hand on Harold's shoulder. The gruff man looked away. “Harold,”
she said, “I'd be honored if you let me sleep here.”

They left Leanin in the room and
continued down the tunnel, showing Rolanda and Gideon their room
next. It was plain, simply having a bed with a sewn together
deerskin comforter lying on top and a slanted wooden desk in the
corner.

“
If you guys need
anything, we'll be right down the hall,” Rheannon said.

Harold hesitated a moment.
“Just so you guys know, the walls here are very thick. I know
there's not always the most privacy when you're out traveling, but
there's no need to restrain yourselves here.”

“
Harold!” Rhea said.
“Would you stop embarrassing me?” She bade them
goodnight and walked out into the hallway.

“
What? There's nothing
embarrassing about the physical act of love.” Harold followed
her out into the hallway, Gideon could hear their voices echoing
back to them. “You remember when we were young? We'd take
any moment of privacy and...”

Gideon shut the door and the
noise stopped. He smiled at Rolanda. She was sitting at the edge
of the bed, her head cocked to one side, hair hanging off her. He
sat beside her and tugged at his boots.

“
Gideon?” Rolanda
asked.

“
Yes Rolanda?”

She bit at her bottom lip as he
took off his gear making no move to take off her own. “You
know that I still love you, right?”

Gideon paused, his boot halfway
off. The silence hung between them, stagnant. “I know,”
he said after a moment. “How are you feeling? We've been in
such a mad rush to get somewhere safe, I haven't really had time to
talk to you.”

Rolanda pushed her hair behind
her ear. It was simply a small, feminine gesture, but it brought
with it a wave of emotion from Gideon. He had seen her do that so
many times, a simple brush behind the ear, it bridged the gap
between the Rolanda that was taken from him and the Rolanda he took
back. It caused a moment of introspection. How
had
he been viewing her these last few days? This was Rolanda, not a
thing to be coddled and cared for like some broken little dish.

“
Things still get fuzzy,
from time to time. I sort of slip around.” Rolanda tried to
smile at him, the corners of her lips tilted up slightly, but that
was all. “I want to thank you for being so patient with me.
I know it can't be easy.”

He finished pulling his boots
off and went to work on his socks. They were wet and sticky, the
smell of sweat strong on them as he peeled them off and flung them
in the corner. “It hasn't been,” he said.

Rolanda took off her riding
jacket and knelt before him. She was still wearing the ratty
clothes they had stolen for her, they hung loosely on her body. “I
know that men have certain needs,” she said. Leaning forward,
the large shirt hung low, showing the top curves of her breasts.
Gideon's heart began to beat faster as she moved closer to him. “I
understand that there are things that you want that I can do, and I
can't think of a better place than this for them to happen.”
Taking a deep breath, she paused for a moment. “I'm nervous
that it'll bring out the spiders, but I want to try.” She
worked the belt off his trousers slowly, swallowing hard.

“
Rolanda, this is such a
new side to you,” Gideon said. The rush of blood in his ears
deafened him with the rhythmic thumping of his own heart. She slid
his pants down around his ankles, his skin raised in little goose
bumps in the cool air. Kissing him on the lips softly, her hands
explored his body.

“
I want to try...”
she said again as her kisses moved down his stomach. She took him
into her mouth, Gideon had never experienced such a hot and wet
feeling like that. His hands worked themselves greedily down the
front of her shirt, grasping at her swollen breasts. He stood and
grabbed her by the arms, pulling her onto the bed and tearing at her
pants.

Something changed in her.
Rolanda's eyes got wide and she pressed him gently away. “Wait,
Gideon,” Rolanda said, holding on to the tops of her stolen
jeans. “Slow down, give me a little time.”

He ignored her as he broke the
top button of her jeans in his haste. Every inch of fabric
frustrated his efforts, soon he was tearing madly at her shirt, her
pants. Once exposed she crossed her legs, stopping him once more.

“
Gideon, give me a little
time,” she said. She had a scared look on her face. "I
want to try, just be patient."

But he was beyond patience. His
blood was up and desire was the only emotion he felt. He forced her
legs apart, feeling strong and large as every boundary that had
frustrated him, every obstacle in his path, finally gave way.
Hooking his legs under hers he leveraged her wider, forcing himself
up on her. Her nails dug painfully into his skin, each gouge
heightening his need.

“
Gideon, wait, not like
this,” she said. Turning her head to the side her features
suddenly went slack, her pupils dilating. Every muscle of hers
relaxed and she went limp.

He thrust himself up inside her,
desperate to feel her heat, to be close, connected to her. With
every thrust his madness increased, the itch finally being
scratched. A shiver ran through his entire body and his toes curled
as he felt himself clench and a thunderous orgasm crashed through
him. The strength left him in waves, and with weakness came
clarity.

“
Rolanda, are you okay?”
He asked, pulling himself from inside her and laying down on the
bed. "What's wrong?"

For a moment she didn't respond,
her breathing shallow, her eyes unblinking and unfocused. Then she
took a deep breath, coming back from wherever she was. “I
thought I could, and I couldn't, but you did anyway,” she
said. Weeping softly, she turned her back to him. “I'm so
sorry, Gideon. I'm so sorry.”

He tried to put an arm around
her but she pushed him away, moving as far to the edge of the bed as
she could. The scratches from her nails were deep and red all over
his body. “I'm sorry, Rolanda, I should have stopped.”

She sat up in bed and pulled her
knees to her chest, hugging her entire body, the comforter wrapped
around her. “Gideon, I think something's broken inside of
me.”

He hugged her close. She let
him, leaning her head against the crook of his neck. “Don't
worry, Rolanda. It'll just take time to be yourself again.”

“
What if I never am? What
if I always have these,” she paused as though she could snatch
the word she was looking for out of thin air, “these little
spiders crawling around inside my brain?” Clutching at her
head she let out a fresh wave of sobs. “You don't deserve
this, go out and lay with Leanin, I know you both want to. I can
see it, the only thing stopping you from happiness is me.”
She pulled away from him and buried herself in the covers, hiding
her face.

Gideon's jaw went slack. There
was no denying that there had been certain temptations, dirty little
stray nighttime thoughts, but that's all they were. Leanin was
certainly good to look at, good to be around, but no, there was
nothing there. He was sure of it. “Rolanda, no. Leanin and
I are becoming good friends, we've been through a lot together, but
that's all that we are and that's all that we ever will be. You
don't have to worry about us like that, it's just your mind working
itself against you. You said it yourself, you sometimes don't know
exactly what's real, right?”

Rolanda peeked an eye out from
under the covers, rimmed with tears and blood-shot red. “Sometimes
I wonder. There are looks between you two.”

Gideon laughed and pulled her
out from under the covers, placing his arms around her. “Listen
to yourself Rolanda. You're talking about love, an extreme feeling,
and you're basing that assumption on a few looks? Little glances?
How can you be so sure when you're not even sure if all the things
you see in the daytime are real?”

After a moment Rolanda nodded.
“I didn't think that this was one of them.”

Gideon brushed away her tears
with his thumb and stroked a hair out of her face, kissing her
forehead and her cheeks. “You're so sweet and innocent.
Rather than trying to read my heart from my eyes, why don't you just
trust me when I tell you that I don't have any feelings for Leanin,
that my heart belongs to you utterly and completely?”

They lay back down
together, Rolanda in the crook of Gideon's shoulder, her tears
drying. Soon she was fast asleep, but Gideon lay awake long into
the night staring up into the pitch black ceiling, his face slack,
his eyes far away.

Rolanda woke him in the morning
by kissing him softly on the cheek. She was fully dressed in the
same beige brown woolen clothes that Harold and Rheannon wore.
Smiling largely, she kissed the corner of his eyes, his cheek, his
ear. He groaned and turned over, pulling the covers with him.

“
No, Gideon, it's time to
wake up. Harold wants some help with the chores,” Rolanda
said, placing her hands down on his lower back.

Gideon jerked away from her.
“Abraham you're cold!”

She jumped on top of him, her
long golden hair falling all around him, enveloping him. The sweet
smell of bacon frying wafted through the open door as he yawned his
way awake.

“
They're letting us sleep
in their house and feeding us, the least we can do is wake up and
help them with a few chores,” she said.

Gideon sat up and threw on a
shirt, wiping the crust of sleep from his eyes and following Rolanda
up into the main room of the house. The smell of bacon grew
stronger as he approached. Harold and Rheannon were frying thick
slabs of it on an iron plate over the fire, the bacon popping and
sizzling in its own juices. Leanin was setting out the dishes on
the table.

“
Good morning to you,”
Harold said. “How did you sleep last night?”

“
I haven't slept like that
in ages,” Rolanda said with a smile. The wrinkles and bags
under her eyes had faded, her face had a nice flush to it, it really
did look like the sleep had done her well. She caught Gideon
staring openly at her and gave him a wink.

“
It's the air, most like,”
Rheannon said. “I remember when we first started staying
here, it was almost dizzying there was so much real oxygen. I
wasn't used to it.”

Harold set a big frying pan down
in the middle of the table, there were heaps of fried potatoes and
bacon, and a small bowl of hard boiled eggs set next to them. He
spooned great gobs of it all on everyone's plates.

“
The bacon is from
Beamer's place down the road. There are a few families in the area
that have pigs, we don't cotton much to the smell so we just trade
for them. Of course Lily, Beamer's wife, would probably say the
same thing about goats and chickens, so to each his own.”

Harold and Rheannon laughed and
held hands while they ate. Gideon had his mouth too full to join in
the conversation, the thickly cut bacon was so salty and sweet he
savored each bite.

For as healthy as Rolanda looked
after a good night's sleep, Leanin looked the exact opposite. Her
hair was in tangles and there were bags under her bloodshot and
squinting eyes. She pushed the food around her plate, only a
fraction of what she touched ended up in her mouth.

“
So,” Harold said,
“was it nice being able to share a bed together again? It's a
good mattress, Rhea and I have tried it out more than once.”