“
I’m sorry. I…” I looked
to Talley for help, but instead discovered she’d lost her battle
against the tears. “Just somebody tell me what I’ve done so I can
fix it.”
Jase laughed, a mocking and cruel sound.
“
If he made a declaration
there is no going back,” Charlie said, the pity in his voice almost
as horrible as Jase’s laugh.
“
What do you mean ‘a
declaration’? No going back from what?”
“
See what I mean? She
doesn’t know anything about being a Shifter, but she keeps coming
into our world and making a mess of things.”
A spike of anger stabbed through me, but it
was almost instantly replaced by guilt. Yes, I was a Shifter now.
And no, I didn’t ask for it to happen, but Jase was right. I was an
outsider who kept hurting everyone I loved over and over again.
“
Jase, why don’t you take
Talley upstairs?” Jase snarled up his nose and opened his mouth to
snap something back at Charlie, but then Talley muttered something
that might have been “I’m okay” or “That’s okay” or, possibly, “No
freaking way.”
“
Come on, Tal,” Jase said,
moving his hand as if to put it on her shoulder but stopping so it
hovered a few inches from her actual person.
“
You don’t have to
—”
“
We’re mates now,” he
said, sparing me a glare. “We might as well start learning to act
like it.” Her shoulder dipped in as she wrapped her arms across the
top of her stomach. “Please, Tal. I can’t stay down here anymore.”
Another go-to-hell look shot in my direction. Talley nodded and,
without even sparing me a glance, went with Jase up the
stairs.
“
Have you eaten yet?”
Charlie asked as he watched them go.
I shook my head slowly, the mere thought of
food making me ill.
“
Come on. I’ll make you
toast.”
I wanted to tell him I didn’t want toast,
and I most certainly didn’t want him making it for me. The absolute
last thing I wanted was to talk to Charlie again, but I followed
him to the kitchen anyway, too drained by Jase to put up a
fight.
“
Peanut butter and honey
or butter and jelly?” he asked, moving around the cupboards as I
slid onto a kitchen chair.
“
Dry,” I said.
Charlie raised an eyebrow and grabbed some
Nutella.
I was completely confused by his actions.
Six months ago this was exactly what I would’ve expected from him,
but now? After the last two months? After last night? After this
morning? He should have been filled with the same hostile energy as
Jase, not flitting about the kitchen making me toast.
“
Charlie, you have to
know, I honestly didn’t think this mate thing was going to be a big
deal.”
“
Of course you didn’t.”
The bread popped out of the toaster, a beautiful golden brown. “And
it’s probably the only thing that would’ve worked short of taking
down an entire Pack in a Dominance Challenge, which I’m fairly
certain we’re not up for.” He slathered Nutella onto the toast
before bringing it over to me. “Here. You need protein.”
I took his offering, sniffed it as if the
chocolate and hazel nutty goodnes might be rancid, and took a small
bite. It was possibly the best food I’d ever put in my mouth.
“
Charlie, why are you
being so nice to me?” I knew I was opening up a Costco-sized can of
angsty worms, but I had to know.
Charlie looked as if he didn’t understand
the question. “You’re one of my best friends.”
I will not cry again. I
will not cry again. I will not cry again…
“
Even after… everything?”
It couldn’t be that easy. “Charlie, I kissed you and then ran away.
Twice. In less than twelve hours.”
“
Yeah, not the most
stellar thing for my self-esteem, so can we never speak of it
again?”
“
Then, why…?” I took a
deep breath. “I thought you would be mad.”
Charlie slid a second piece of toast across
the table. “I’ve never really been good at staying mad at you. The
longest I’ve ever lasted was when you told your mom that Jase and I
had been playing soldiers on the roof.” He smiled. It was just a
tiny little thing, but it was real enough to make my heart do a
merry skip. “It took you most the afternoon to worm your way back
into my good graces.”
“
But the past two
months…”
“
The past two months have
been hell on everyone.” All traces of the smile were gone as he
slumped into the seat opposite me. “And I didn’t make it any easier
on you. I’m sorry about that. Really. I was so lost in my own head
I couldn’t see straight.” He started brushing crumbs off the table
in an uncharacteristic bout of nervousness. “I’ve been seeing
someone,” he finally blurted out.
I was glad he was concentrating so hard on
clearing the table of toast debris he didn’t see my reaction.
“
Is she nice?” Something
was wrong with my chest, like maybe my lungs went
missing.
“
He’s great.” Charlie
looked up and caught my expression. The bark of laughter that
followed was so abrupt I nearly fell out of my seat. “A shrink,
Scout. I’ve been going to therapy.”
“
Oh, good!” Crap, that
wasn’t right. “I don’t mean good good, I just mean, you know…”
Either the temperature in the kitchen suddenly skyrocketed or my
face was glowing red with embarrassment. “So, the therapy thing is
helping with stuff?”
“
I’m not spinning through
the meadow, singing about how alive the mountains are or anything,
but yeah, I’m learning to deal.”
“
What is it with you and
musicals, Chuck?”
“
You know
Judd?”
“
From
Oklahoma!?”
Charlie sighed. “From Randy’s”
“
Oh, that Judd. I think I
saw him wrapped up in a zebra print Snuggie this
morning.”
“
Yeah, that’s Judd,” he
said as if the guy was often seen in animal print novelty items.
“His dad is the guy I’ve been going to. After you left this
morning, Judd called him and asked him to come over. We’ve been
talking things out for hours.”
Great, I drove Charlie to
a marathon session with a shrink. I was made of win. “Was he able
to help?”
Maybe give you some helpful
hints as to how to cut me out of your life forever before I
completely ruin it?
“
He did.” Charlie took a
deep breath and then focused on me. Intently. Frighteningly so. “He
helped me figure out some stuff.”
“
Stuff like…?” I was being
nosey and rude, but I had to know.
“
Stuff like how you and I
can’t go back to where we were or get to where we were going, and
that it’s unfair for either of us to try.” I couldn’t say anything
since my tongue decided to glue itself to the roof of my mouth, but
I nodded as if I understood. “And I realized there are some things
about us that will never change, no matter what.”
“
What things are
those?”
Charlie reached across the table and took
hold of my fingers. “We’re friends, Scout. To infinity and beyond.
No matter what, I will always be your friend.”
Dammit. I was crying. Again. “Friends. Until
the rest of ever.”
Big, manly fingers tightened around my boney
ones. “We cool?”
All this time I thought I wanted Charlie
pushed far out of my life. I was wrong. And I knew I was wrong
because at that moment, when I realized he wasn’t going anywhere,
my face nearly split in two from smiling so freaking hard. “Like a
cucumber.”
“
Good, because Jase and
Talley aren’t right now.”
And with that joyous breakthrough, we were
moving on to the next crisis.
“
Since we’re cool now,
could you please just explain to me what I did wrong without
vaguing it all up to the point I can’t understand what anyone is
talking about?”
Charlie pulled his hands back across the
table. “How much to you know about mating?”
“
In the general, animal
kingdom sense, or specific Shifter stuff?”
“
Specific Shifter
stuff.”
“
Nothing.”
“
Nothing?”
“
Nope. Not a
thing.”
Charlie’s forehead folded up like an
accordion. “Then how did you know to tell Talley’s dad she was
mated?”
My dead boyfriend told me
in one of my crazy person dreams.
“
I overheard someone say
something about mates somewhere and just threw it out there.
Honestly, I had no idea it would actually work.”
“
So, you don’t know
anything about declarations or oaths or lifelong bonds?” I shook my
head. “You really have no clue what just happened, do
you?”
“
I pissed off Jase and
made Talley cry. That pretty much sums up everything I know up to
this point.”
Charlie leaned back in the chair, raising
two of the feet off the floor. “Mating is something that can only
happen between Shifters and Seers. You remember in history class
how the prince of one country would marry the princess of another
country so when they became King and Queen their countries would be
allies?”
“
Yes.”
“
Mating works a little
like that.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose between two
fingers. “For the love of all things holy, please tell me you guys
don’t arrange marriages.” I was so going to have to go all Rosie
the Riveter on the Shifter world over this crazy crap.
“
Not exactly. The Seer is
always free to pick her mate, if she takes one. Most don’t
bother.”
“
Seers don’t believe in
marriage?”
Charlie’s chair plopped back down. “Marriage
and mating aren’t exactly the same. If this is having a spouse,” he
lifted one hand, chest high, “then this is having a mate.” He
lifted the other hand as high as it would go, considered it for a
moment, and then turned his hand so his fingers stretched towards
the ceiling.
I frowned. “It’s more what? Demanding?
Intimate? The ceremony makes Prince William and Kate’s wedding look
like a Vegas drive-thru? Are they one of those annoying couples
always attached at the hip?”
“
Yes.”
“
Yes to which
part?”
“
All of it.” Charlie
looked at the ceiling, his hands suspended in front of him. He
seemed to be seeking guidance. “It’s complicated,” he finally
said.
I kicked him under the table. “Try
again.”
“
I don’t know, really.
It’s all sort of mysterious and secretive. I just know mates can’t
get a divorce, ever. And there is some sort of bond that happens,
like a weird psychic connection or something that dulls the further
away you are from your mate. It’s the reason Mrs. Matthews came
here.”
“
Mr. and Mrs. Matthews are
mated? But I thought you said mates can’t get divorced?”
“
They can’t.” He leaned in
and lowered his voice. “Apparently, Mr. Matthews was really
abusive. When Mrs. Matthews found out she was pregnant with Talley
she got scared and petitioned the Alphas, asking them to cull Mr.
Matthews from the Pack.”
“
Cull?”
Charlie slid a finger
across his throat. Of course,
cull
. Shouldn’t I have already
figured out that was how Shifters dealt with all issues?
“
They refused, but they
did allow her to leave her Pack. They placed her in a Lexington
Pack at first, but he was still able to mess with her through their
connection, so they sent her here to watch over Jase.”
Poor Talley. I knew her parents were screwed
up, but this was reality TV bad.
“
Have you ever noticed how
Mrs. Matthews never dates?”
Well, it never occurred to me she should,
but… “Yeah.”
“
It’s because she’s still
mated. Mates can only be with each other. Although, I’m not sure if
there’s an issue,” he tilted his head down and raised his eyebrows,
“or what.”
“
But there is a ceremony,
right? To make people mates? Jase and Talley just won’t do that.
We’ll think of a new solution, and then they can fake break off
their fake relationship.”
“
Except Jase said he swore
an oath.”
“
Yeah, but he was just
calling Mr. Matthews’ bluff.”
I knew Charlie’s response from the grim line
of his mouth before he ever said anything. “His motivation doesn’t
matter. Once he’s claimed her, it’s set in stone. By this time next
year there will be a ceremony, and then they’re mated.
Forever.”
If my heart made it through the day without
actually exploding it would be a miracle. “A year? But Jase just
turned eighteen last month. They can’t get married or whatever it
is mates do.”
“
They have to.”
“
Or what? They get
whacked?”
“
Not killed.
Banished.”
“
Banished
from…?”
“
Shifter culture. They
can’t be a part of a Pack and can’t hold territory.”
My shoulders slumped in relief. I really
thought they’d be as good as severely punished. “That doesn’t sound
so bad. It’s not like anyone could force us to kick them out.”
“
Actually, they
would.”
Of course they would. “How exactly would
they do that?”