Too Rich and Too Dead
Read Too Rich and Too Dead Online
Authors: Cynthia Baxter
Murder Packs a Suitcase
An Independent Mystery Booksellers
Association Bestseller
“A new series that capitalizes on Baxter's trademark humor and ingenuity … Pack a virtual suitcase and accompany Mallory on her assignment from hell … A perfect choice for the Elaine Viets fan.”
—
Mystery Scene
“Perfect train or plane reading … [a] very promising series.”
—
Connecticut Post
Forum
“With a character as appealing as veterinarian Jessica Popper in her Reigning Cats & Dogs series … Baxter will have you hankering for another excursion with Mallory.”
—
Richmond Times-Dispatch
“Thoroughly entertaining … The mystery is well-plotted, the culprit a surprise and the tie-in to Mallory's old life will leave the reader wanting more.”
“Author Cynthia Baxter has conjured the varied flavors of the Sunshine State to deliver a mystery packed with orange punch. Go ahead, take a sip.”
“Baxter excels in creating a strong amateur sleuth whose inquisitiveness is only exceeded by the complications she gets herself into … A wonderful journey.”
—A Book Blogger's Diary
and
PRAISE FOR CYNTHIA BAXTER'S
Reigning Cats & Dogs
Mysteries
“Should be on your [summer reading list]!”
—
Newsday
“[Baxter's] neatly laid-out red herrings, charming heroine and surprise ending will not disappoint.”
—
Romantic Times
(4½ stars)
“A cleverly constructed mystery chock-full of dysfunctional characters all hiding motives for murder… Readers… [will] savor this delightful cozy.”
—
Publishers Weekly
“The plot is multilayered and cleverly presented, with good characterization and pacing. It is the kind of story that draws you in immediately and keeps you reading eagerly….HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.”
—
I Love a Mystery
“A very entertaining series with a menagerie of colorful human and animal characters.”
—
Mystery Lovers Bookshop News
“Cynthia Baxter has done it once again, and created an extremely enjoyable, laugh-out-loud-funny mystery that would please anyone.”
—
California Community Bugle
“A real page-turner. If you love good mysteries or love animals or mysteries with animals, you'll love Baxter's
Putting On the Dog.”
—
Long Island Times-Herald
“Clever, fast-paced and well-plotted… Five paws up!”
—Carolyn Hart, Agatha, Anthony, and Macavity awards winner
“Dead canaries don't sing, but you will after reading this terrific mystery!”
—Rita Mae Brown,
New York Times
bestselling author
“A little bird told me to read this mystery, which is awfully good. For the record, I would shred any canary who insulted me.”
—Sneaky Pie Brown,
New York Times
bestselling cat
“Dead Canaries Don't Sing
is top dog, the cat's pajamas, and the paws that refresh all rolled into one un-fur-gettable mystery entertainment.”
—Sarah Graves, author of the
Home Repair Is Homicide
mysteries
The
Murder Packs a Suitcase
Mystery Series
Murder Packs a Suitcase
The
Reigning Cats & Dogs
Mystery Series
Dead Canaries Don't Sing
Putting On the Dog
Lead a Horse to Murder
Hare Today, Dead Tomorrow
Right from the Gecko
Who's Kitten Who?
Monkey See, Monkey Die
And coming soon:
Murder Had a Little Lamb
To Tama,
who also can't sit still
“I travel a lot; I hate having my life disrupted by routine.”
—Caskie Stinnett
W
hoa! Who's
that?”
Jordan asked, leaning over to pick up the newspaper he'd just knocked off the kitchen table en route to the refrigerator. “She's really hot!”
Mallory Marlowe glanced up from the coffee mug that up until that moment had been the focus of her attention. She assumed that the female who had aroused such a strong reaction in her eighteen-year-old son would turn out to be a member of the Star-of-the-Month club, some actress or singer who was as well known for flaunting her curves as she was for her talent.
So as soon as she saw the face staring back at her from the front page of the
New York Times
Style section, she gasped.
“Oh, my gosh!” she cried. “I
know
her!”
“‘Carly Cassidy Berman,’” Jordan read aloud. “She invented some magic potion that makes people young again. Or so she claims.”
“Let me see that.”
Mallory reached for the newspaper, still wondering if somehow she was mistaken. Yet there was Carly Cassidy, staring right back at her from page one, wearing the same cat-that-ate-the-canary grin she'd worn when she'd been crowned Homecoming Queen. In full color, no less.
“You really know her?” Jordan asked as he retrieved a carton of orange juice from the refrigerator.
“I sure do,” Mallory replied. “We went to JFK High together. Everybody knew her. In fact, she was voted Most Likely to Succeed.”
“Cool.” Jordan plopped down in the seat opposite hers. “She looks amazing—for somebody your age, I mean. Maybe that crazy potion of hers really works.”
Mallory had to agree that that was a definite possibility. From the picture, it looked as if wrinkles, not to mention cellulite, had failed to stake a claim during the past two and a half decades. In fact, Carly didn't look much older than she had in high school.
True, her hairstyle had changed. Gone were the long, silky tresses that as a teenager she was forever flipping over her shoulder. While her hair was still just as blond and still just as silky, these days it was cut into a complicated set of layers. It curved around her face in such a flattering way that it looked as if a stylist had meticulously arranged each individual strand.
Her face had also changed since her days of shouting “Who's your worst en-e-my? John F. Kenn-e-dy! Go-o-o, Bulldogs, go!” on the football field every Saturday. But while her girlish prettiness was gone, it had been replaced by a womanly beauty that was at least as striking.
All in all, there was no mistaking that the woman pictured on the front page was indeed Carly Cassidy, apparently now known as Carly Cassidy Berman. After taking a strong sip of her coffee, Mallory began to read.
Enterprising Entrepreneur
Bottles the Waters
of the Fountain of Youth
Can drinking a magic potion twice a day turn back the hands of the clock? Carly Cassidy Berman thinks so. So do the thousands of believers who have been scrambling to snatch Berman's creation, Rejuva-Juice, off the shelves at health food stores all over the country.
They've also been flocking to Berman's chichi spa, Tavaci Springs, its name derived from the Native American Ute tribe's word for “sun.” She opened it less than a year ago in tony Aspen, Colorado, well known as an enclave of the financially and physically fit. Local residents and visitors alike not only endure a six-month wait for a reservation; they also pay upwards of fifteen hundred dollars a day for the privilege of staying at this mountain hideaway that combines the rustic elements of a
former silver mining town with an array of touchy-feely New Age accoutrements. The hefty price tag enables guests to imbibe unlimited quantities of the pricey potion, as well as to indulge in facials, massages, body wraps, and even mud baths that incorporate the same ingredients that reportedly make Rejuva-Juice “plastic surgery in liquid form.”
But fans of Rejuva-Juice say it's much more than Botox-in-a-bottle. Its devotees insist that it also significantly increases both their energy level and their mental powers.
The secret, according to the elixir's creator, is the unique ingredients, which Berman claims have never before been available. The determined entrepreneur spent two years traveling around the world, trekking to remote villages in such locales as the Himalayas in Nepal, the rain forests of South America, and the tropical islands of the South Pacific. Her mission was to learn about the herbs, roots, and other substances that primitive peoples have used for centuries to improve their well-being and increase their life span.
As for the formula used to make this magical potion, the wizard behind it has no intention of divulging it.
“That's a secret I'll take to my grave,” jokes Berman, who is forty-five but looks at least a decade younger, making her a walking advertisement for her product's effectiveness. “Some of Rejuva-Juice's components are already well known, such as açaí berries and goji juice. But others, the ones that really make it so amazingly effective, were never available
in this country before. That is, until I spent two years slogging through mud and climbing mountains and paddling down rivers to reach the most isolated spots in the world. I was determined to track down these miracle ingredients and bring them back home with me.”
Mallory stopped reading long enough to take another sip of coffee. Oddly enough, it suddenly tasted like some of that mud Carly Cassidy had slogged through en route to fame and fortune.
She skimmed the rest of the article, which interwove experts’ dismissals of Rejuva-Juice's purported benefits with quotes from some of its die-hard fans, including a few movie stars who were household names. When she reached the end, she sighed loudly and folded the newspaper in half, coincidentally removing Carly's face from view.
Mallory did her best to muster up good feelings about her former acquaintance's success. After all, she had nothing against her, aside from the mild case of envy that suddenly reared its ugly head, momentarily making her feel as if she was back in high school.
Involuntarily, she glanced down at her ratty pink bathrobe, a gift from her daughter long before she'd even started college. In fact, she seemed to remember that it dated back to the time when Amanda still believed in Santa Claus. As if the robe's fraying cuffs and threadbare chenille weren't depressing enough, she was also wearing the bottom halves of what had once been her son Jordan's pajamas. After the seam
had ripped along the thigh, he'd deemed them too shabby to remain part of his working wardrobe. Mallory's standards weren't quite as high.
As for the T-shirt that completed her outfit, it had once belonged to her husband. Her reason for hanging onto this particular item was rooted more in emotion than practicality or laziness. Less than two years had passed since David had died. The shock of learning that he had plummeted from the balcony of a high-rise hotel had been bad enough. But her subsequent discovery that his death might have been the result of foul play—and her realization that she would never know the whole truth—haunted her at least as much.