Total Knockout (19 page)

“It's okay. This might sound dumb, but I sort of missed you. Like with boxing and stuff. Anyway,” he said, “I have to talk to you about something, and you're the only person who will understand.”

I said something like, “Mmm-hmm.” Honestly, I couldn't focus, and I couldn't understand what I was feeling. I kept telling myself,
This is just Cooper!
But when did his lips get so red and fluffy?

“Don't tell anyone I told you, but Melanie is on the verge of blowing this fund-raiser.” I stared back at him
blankly. “She has this crazy idea, and the whole thing is going to be a huge failure.”

“You want me to help Melanie.”

He nodded sheepishly. “Loosh, you don't understand what she has planned. It's going to explode in her face. Possibly literally. I heard Jared talking about it in the halls with his friends. Can't you just offer to help?”

“Melanie and I aren't talking. In fact, I'm pretty sure we're not even friends anymore.”

“Why?” he asked. I looked at him severely, like
How could you not know?!
“Come on, don't be like that. You apologized to me, you can apologize to her.”

“Who says I'm the one who should be doing all the apologizing?”

“Well, what'd we do?”

Cooper Nixon just called himself and Melanie O'Hare a “we.”

He didn't understand what she had taken from me, whether it was on purpose or not. He didn't know that she might be a better president than I was and that I'd been wasting my time all these years. He didn't care how I was doing now that everything I cared about had been snatched away from me. I was sad. I was tired. Cooper looked at me with big, brown eyes and fluffy red lips,
and without realizing what I was doing, I leaned in and kissed him. Right on the mouth.

It was my first kiss, and I felt it immediately. It lasted only a moment, but everything around us seemed to fade away, and I felt all melty. When I pulled back, my heart seemed to fold in on itself, and I even felt a little faint, which I think is technically called “swooning.” I slowly opened my eyes, and that's when I saw Cooper's wide-open eyes staring at me in a way that can only be described as shocked. And not in the pleasantly surprised kind of way, either.

“Oh my God,” I said, touching my hand to my lips.

“Why did you do that?” he said. Actually, more like demanded.

“I—I don't know,” I said honestly.
He didn't like it. He's totally grossed out. He hates me even more now.
“I'm sorry.”

Cooper looked around us, and I realized, with absolute relief, that there was no one in the halls. But now I was going to be late for class.

“I—I gotta get to class,” Cooper said without looking at me, then quickly turned and walked away. As I stood alone in the halls, still touching my mouth, I wondered if my life could get any worse. Kissing Cooper
actually felt good. I would have thought it would be like kissing my brother, but it wasn't. It was like kissing a boy. And I liked it.

But he hadn't.

I wanted to take it back. I wanted to take everything back. This was supposed to be my best year of junior high and to prepare me for high school, but I'd only made things go horribly wrong. But with this, with Cooper, I
had
to fix it. I refused to go any longer without my best friend. Because that's what was important—Cooper, as my best friend. I would never admit it out loud, but I was glad my first kiss ever was with Cooper Nixon, even if it was our last kiss ever.

Later that same day (was it actually still only Monday?!), I rushed toward the cafeteria to find Cooper. I got there just before he went inside, and I grabbed his wrist and pulled him to the side of the vending machine before he even knew what was happening. When he got a good look at me, he said, “Uh, Lucia, seriously. I really like you as a friend, but . . .”

“Oh, stop it. I'm not going to kiss you again.”

He looked at me skeptically. “You're not?” I shook my head. I saw his face start to relax, the old Coop looking back at me. “Promise?”

“I swear, I promise I will never in my life ever try to kiss you again.”

He cracked a smile and said, “Thank God.”

I covered my face with my hands, mortified at the whole thing. “Oh my God, I am so sorry. Please, can we just forget that ever happened?”

“Not sure if that's possible,” he said. “But it's cool. I always knew you were in love with me.” For the second time that day, the world stopped and so did my breathing. Maybe he did . . . “Kidding, Loosh. Dang, take a breath or something, you look like you're about to pass out.”

“I'm such a mess.”

“Clearly.” He laughed.

We stood for a moment as the last of our grade filed into the cafeteria. I told myself that later I would reprogram my mind to think about Cooper the way I used to—as a friend and not a guy. I figured with enough self-discipline, I could brainwash myself.

“I can't believe all the drama I've created,” I said, eager to change the subject. “Does everyone still hate me for fudging the vote?”

“Nah,” Cooper said. “I don't even think they remember anymore. Now everyone's talking about the new cheerleading coach. Did you see Nicole's article on it?”

I had. Apparently, April DeHart's dad had paid for an outside cheer coach, which was against district rules. I could take a hit with Nicole's stories, but I wasn't sure April could.

“I think Nicole is getting more ruthless,” I said. “She was there in the meeting when I had the idea of a contest to boost vending-machine sales, and then her article made it sound like it was Jared's idea.”

“I know. I kind of schooled her on that.”

“You did?” He shrugged, like it was no big deal. “What'd you say?”

“I don't remember. I was just mad about the article in general. She made it sound like we were all so happy without you.”

Which was exactly what I had been wondering. “But aren't you? I mean, you didn't come to me after you read it.”

He put his hands in his baggy jeans pockets and looked out the side door. “I know. I really was mad at you. Not just for the hit but for, like . . .” He paused. “Sometimes it was like I wasn't allowed to have any friends but you. You've gotten sort of . . .
bossy
over the last couple of years.”

I felt myself cringe. I had been motivated to be taken
seriously and to leave my mark on the school. But I didn't know I'd been bossy. I really didn't. “Why didn't you tell me?”

“I don't know. Whatever, I'm telling you now. I didn't
not
like you, so stop looking like you're going to vomit or something.” He lightly punched my shoulder. “Just lighten up or something. You don't have to be so serious all the time.”

“Oh, don't worry. I'm definitely on a new mission.”

He smiled. “Listen. I was serious about what I said before about Melanie and the fund-raiser. Will you say something to her? Maybe just subtly offer to help her or something?”

“I don't think she'll want my help,” I said. “I told you, we're not talking. We got into a huge fight this morning on the bus.”

“Really?”

I nodded but didn't elaborate. He seemed to understand and didn't ask any questions.

“I know you don't want anything to mess up the fund-raiser,” he continued. “Raising the money is what's important, right? Just say something to her. Don't tell her I said this, but she might ruin it all.”

I sighed. I didn't want that either. “Fine. I will only
because you want me to. And I'm telling you, she's not going to like it.”

“Just try,” he pressed.

If I was truly keeping my expectations low, then I shouldn't expect her to welcome my assistance with open arms. Before even saying a word to Melanie, I knew she'd hate my butting in.

“Come on,” he said, tugging on my hand.
Zing!
I thought of how jealous I'd been when he grabbed Melanie's wrist on the trampoline. “Let's do it now, get it over with.”

“No way! I'll do it, but not now. After lunch.” I certainly didn't want an audience for this.

“Fine,” he said.

“And for the record,” I said as we headed toward the cafeteria, away from where Melanie sat with Rose Andreas and Catherine Collins, “I'm only doing this for you and the football team. Not her.”

I was thankful that Cooper sat with me, even though he kept looking toward Melanie like he'd rather be sitting with her.

When the bell rang, I told Cooper I'd see him later as I headed toward Melanie and her friends.

“Good luck,” he cheered. “And thanks!”

“Hey,” I said as I approached Melanie, trying to sound casual, but my heart was pounding and I could feel Rose's and Catherine's eyes on me. After this, I would be totally paid up on my debt to Cooper. “Um, can I talk to you for a sec?” She told her friends she'd see them later, then turned to face me.

“Look,” she said before I even began. “About this morning. I'm really sorry.”

“You don't have to apologize. I was the bigger jerk. I'm just all messed up because of the whole . . . thing.”

“I know,” she said. “It's okay.”

“Look, I know you have something really big planned for the fund-raiser. I just wanted to say, if you need any help on it or anything, just let me know.”

“Really?” She sounded like she didn't believe me.

“Yes.”

“Well, thanks for offering,” she said, “but I'm pretty sure I've got it covered.”

“Yeah, well. I just thought I'd offer. I have a lot of experience with fund-raisers.”

Melanie looked off down the hall, where Cooper was standing by a water fountain as if he were trying to decide whether he was thirsty. “You don't think I can
do it, do you?” I hated to admit it, but truthfully I didn't think she could, given her track record and the fact that Cooper had asked me to help save the whole thing. But by thinking all this just after she asked me, I guess my silence gave her the answer. “I can do this,” Melanie said defiantly, “without you. You'll see.”

“Melanie, that's not what—”

But she was already running down the hall, right past Cooper without stopping. I turned and headed in the other direction.

“Loosh, wait up!”

When Cooper caught up to me, I said, “I can't believe I just did that.” I'd never had faith that Melanie could follow through with anything, but I didn't know that she knew I thought that. It made me feel horrible for thinking it in the first place.

“What happened?”

“Forget it,” I told him. “She can do it on her own.”

“Come on, Loosh. You have to help her.”

I stopped and faced Cooper, even though I was so totally going to be late for class. “No, Cooper. She has to do it on her own. Don't you get it?”

“No, I don't!”

I started walking again. “She'll do fine. I'm sure the whole thing is going to be great.” I said the words, but I didn't believe them.

“Stop being like that!” he said, but I wasn't
being like that
. I was trying to be a good friend to Melanie by giving her space to make her own mark. Was that so awful?

“Loosh, would you please stop?” Cooper begged, trying to keep pace with me.

I kept walking until Cooper finally backed off. It wasn't until I got to my locker that I realized he'd never told me what she planned to do.

The annual fund-raiser began on Friday during seventh period and went into the after-school hours. Parents left work early to stop by and check it all out, and of course almost everyone loved getting out of class an hour early. That day I didn't mind missing class—I was as anxious as everyone else to see what Melanie had planned, even though I still had a hard time believing I wouldn't be a part of it.

As Nicole had written in my resignation story, this year the goal was to raise money for new, and extra, warm-up suits for the football team. The weather was still unseasonably cold, the team had more players than usual, and there were districtwide budget cuts on athletics programs in general, all adding up to our guys' needing some extra sweat suits. The plaque announcing which class donated the suits would go in the guys'
locker room. With Melanie's name as president. I tried to console myself by telling myself that having my name in the guys' locker room would have been a little tacky, but I didn't really buy it.

When the bell rang ending sixth period and the day, I headed toward the cafeteria with the other excited students with a mixture of enthusiasm, dread, and loneliness. In the past two years, the eighth-grade president had always asked for my help since I was so reliable. I tried to embrace the lightness of having no responsibility and just enjoy the event, but I was worried about Melanie. I didn't want her to fail, but I was also nervous that she'd be better than me on her first try.