Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Plunges into Pennsylvania (34 page)

The next step was to have nine of the thirteen states ratify the
Constitution. That turned out to be a two-year process that involved promising an entire additional document—the Bill of Rights, which was written later in New York. But finally, on June 21, 1788, New Hampshire became the ninth state to ratify the U.S. Constitution, making the document the law of the land. (Rhode Island, incidentally, finally accepted the Consti-tution in 1790, the last of the original thirteen to do so.)

To read about other great documents written in Philadelphia
,

turn to pages 38 and 182
.

 

We're always amazed by the creative ways people use bathrooms, toilets, toilet paper, etc. So we created Uncle John's “Stall of Fame” to honor them. Here are two Pennsylvanians who made their mark . . . with toilets
.

Notable Achievements:
Beating the system and making unique art

True Story:
In November 2000, the Sky Bank announced it was building a branch on a vacant lot next to Suica's home in the western Pennsylvania town of Monaca. Suica, a plumber, didn't like the idea of a bank moving in next door—so he fought back by installing 10 “decorative” toilets on the roof of his garage. Every month or so, he rearranged them to create scenes commemorating the changing seasons. (His Christmas display: Santa's sleigh being pulled by 10 toilet reindeer.)

When the city fined Suica $135 and cited him for creating “unsanitary and unsafe conditions” on his roof, he fought back in court—and won. Judge Thomas Mannix threw out the citation, finding that the town “had not proved the toilets, which Suica bought new, were unsanitary.” Three years later, the city council tried again, arguing that Suica's toilet display was a health hazard because the bowls would collect water that could breed mosquitoes that might bring the West Nile virus. The council withdrew its complaint when it found that Suica had sealed the bowls shut to prevent them from collecting water.

Update:
Sky Bank eventually abandoned its plans to build a bank next to Suica's house.

Notable Achievement:
Decorating his rental properties in a town-appropriate manner

True Story:
In July 2001, Taviani put three toilets on the front lawns of three rental properties he owns in Bath: two were plain white, and the third was pink and planted with pink tulips. His neighbors were outraged, but Taviani maintained that his displays were “art.” The two white toilets were eventually stolen, and the pink one came under fire when locals complained, but the town council couldn't find any evidence that the toilets violated the town's building codes. Last we heard, the pink toilet was still there.

And why toilets in the first place? Taviani explained, “When you think of Bath, you think of a bathroom. Tubs were too big.”

 

 

Grace Kelly, Will Smith, and Jack Palance all have at least one thing in common: they're Pennsylvania natives who have a movie title in this crossword puzzle. (Answers on
page 309
.)

1    Margarita need

5    Musical staff insignia

9    Civil rights protest

14  Director Kazan

15  Powerful engine

16  At full gallop

17  James ___ Jones

18  Seed cover

19  Some fountain drinks

20  1954 Grace Kelly movie

23  Ben & Jerry's “___ Gooey Cake”

(frozen yogurt)

24  “Bad ___ to them!” (luck)

25  Laps up noisily

28  “Should ___ acquaintance . . .”

30  Vital fluid

33  Shiva worshipper

34  Movie lioness

35  Verdi slave girl

36  1996 Will Smith movie

39  Social equal

40  Not the original color

41  ___ de menthe

42  Armenia, once

43  Letter opener

44  Geneva's nation

45  Perky songbird

47  Hemingway nickname

48  1999 Jack Palance movie

54  “Could you give me ___?”

55  Not counterfeit

56  Ancient Peruvian

57  Beat back

58  Memo starter

59  Oscar winner, e.g.

60  Actress Parker

61  Real estate agent's sign

62  Poop out

1    Parrot morsel

2    Jai ___

3    Italian bread?

4    Formidable task

5    Rubs the wrong way

6    Artist Neiman

7    Islamic leader

8    What soap may leave

9    Like some vows and some cows

10  Modern music holders

11  Is partial

12  Cake decorator

13  Nintendo's Super ___

21  Clean, as a spill

22  Bruin athlete

25  Steamers and icebreakers

26  Come-ons

27  Hidden

28  Tree of the birch family

29  “Pre-owned”

31  
Hitchhiker's Guide
writer Douglas

32  One whose name is on the check

34  One-named Irish singer

35  Daring circus performer

37  Perfect spots

38  Some bra features

43  Lethal

44  Cruised the sea

46  She's Dorothy in
Jerry Maguire

47  Oyster's prize

48  Telly's character on
Kojak

49  
Battle Cry
author Leon

50  Get-hitched-quick spot

51  Voting no

52  It's south of Va.

53  Truth alternative

54  Jean of Dada

Rolling Rock beer—in its green bottle with a painted-on label—remains the best-known product to come out of the Allegheny mountain town of Latrobe
.

In the 1970s, Rolling Rock beer was a Northeast institution. But the brewery's founders were an unlikely bunch—an order of Benedictine monks.

The monks opened the Latrobe Brewing Company in 1893, and various owners brewed beer there until 1920, when Prohibition made the manufacture and sale of alcohol illegal in the United States. That seemed to be the end of the brewery, but in 1933, with Prohibition on the verge of repeal, four brothers—Frank, Anthony, Ralph, and Robert Tito—bought the old plant and started making beer again. They had some missteps, but in 1939, they hit on the brew that would make them millionaires: a pale lager they called Rolling Rock after the smooth pebbles they'd seen in nearby streams.

The Titos were beer makers, though, not marketers, and even though their beer developed a loyal fan base in Pennsylvania, they did little to expand their brand. In fact, their salesmen generally sold only to bars and restaurants that were within a day's drive or less from home. But despite the lack of marketing, word of Rolling Rock spread throughout Penn-sylvania and then the northeastern United States. By the early 1970s, the Latrobe Brewing Company was putting out more than 700,000 barrels of beer per year.

But as more beer brewers came on the market, Rolling Rock's lack of a marketing strategy proved to be a problem. In the early 1980s, Latrobe's output dropped by almost half, and the Titos decided to sell. Over the next two decades, various companies (with marketing departments) bought and sold Rolling Rock and helped expand the brand to larger markets. The brewery changed hands several times, but production remained in Latrobe . . . until 2006, when Anheuser-Busch acquired the company and decided to move Rolling Rock production to New Jersey.

It was a blow to locals, who adamantly believed the beer would never be the same. According to the town's former mayor, Jim Gebicki, “It's hard to believe there won't be Rolling Rock in Latrobe. It's a real sadness . . . They can take it to New Jersey, but it will never be Rolling Rock.”

A group of concerned citizens used Internet campaigns and boycotts to try to keep Rolling Rock in Pennsylvania, but they failed. The last batch of Rolling Rock rolled out of Latrobe in July 2006. Many in the town feared this would mean the economic downfall of their community, but the Latrobe Brewing Company soon reopened—in 2007, it started brewing the Boston Beer Company's Signature brand, Samuel Adams.