Uncontrollable (The Nature of Grace, Book 2) (17 page)

Wyn grabs both arms and pulls me into a sitting position. “Take it easy, G.”

Seth looks genuinely worried for the first time. “Dude, she doesn’t look so good. Her skin’s kinda grayish.”

“Don’t tell her that. You’re supposed to make her feel better.”

Seth snaps back. “Well, she ain’t going to feel better if she’s dead, now is she?”

Small sensations come back to me. A tinkling starts in my toes and works up my legs and into my body then trails down my arms. That’s when the pain sets in. Every part of me starts to burn. Like I’m on fire. Any small movement is a jolt of pain.

I try not to move. “I’m cold.” My body starts to shiver badly, like I’m having a seizure.

Wyn holds me down. “Jesus. She’s going into shock or something.”

Seth jumps up and grabs a few things out of the pack for his journey. “I’m gonna go find Porter. They can’t be that far from here.” Seth leans over me. “Hey. Don’t you die on me. I want to be a freakin’ hero.” He winks and runs off.

“Go. Hurry!” Wyn calls after him. He glances back down at me with a pained look on his face as I shiver uncontrollably in his arms. “G, what do I do? I don’t know what to do.”

I focus on controlling my words as best as I can. “I… I need to get warm. Hy–po–thermia.”

His eyes light up. “Build a fire. Got it.” He spends the next five minutes trying to start a fire, but all the wood nearby seems damp from the snow. He looks defeated. “Now what?”

I motion my head to the backpack. “There.”

He starts yanking stuff out of it, sifting through the gear. “Here. These will help.” He takes off my wet glove and slips his dry ones over my hands. Then he slides the extra hand warmers inside, so they’re touching my palms. He shoves a couple into my boots too. The heat feels so good until my hands thaw a little. Then they start to ache.

“The tarp,” I whisper.

He flattens out the tarp on the ground, and I crawl onto it to get my butt and legs off the wet snow. I scan the area and try to think about what we can do. There doesn’t seem to be any natural covering around. Usually building a snow shelter is best, but they can take forever to dig. I’m still trembling, and it seems to be getting worse, not better. Even with the warmers.

“What do I look like?”

Wyn stares at me. “Beautiful.” I look at him blankly until he answers again. “You’re pale as hell.”

“What about my lips?”

“Perfect.” Then he answers again. “Very blue.”

I immediately know that moderate hypothermia has already set in. Luckily, I’m still in Stage Two because Stage Three is not good. It’s hard to talk through the shivers so I throw out single words, hoping he’ll understand. “Shovel.”

He grabs the folding shovel from the pile of stuff and opens it, clicking the lock in place. “Bingo. Now what?”

I point to a dead tree stump on the side of the embankment. It’s already dug out underneath and just needs to be cleared out more.

“Clear.” I stop to catch a breath because it hurts to talk. I hold out my arms.

“Three feet wide. Got it.” Wyn takes off his jacket and wraps it around my shoulders before folding the tarp over me. My body tries to get warm, but the air is blowing right through me. And my clothes are still sopping wet from being buried in the snow so long. Once I’m situated, Wyn jumps up and starts digging. Fast. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him work this hard. After what seems like forever, he stops. Sweat is dripping down his face.

“Is that good enough?” he asks.

At this point, I’m shaking uncontrollably. Almost Stage Three, but I still have my wits about me. I focus on the task at hand.

“Yeesss. Vent.”

He climbs up on the stump and drives a stick down into the top of the man-made cave. It goes through pretty easily. This might actually work. The wind picks up and swirls some snow. Wyn glances around.

“What else?”

I’ve never seen him this eager. I smile and hiss two words. “Mountain man.”

He gives me a serious look. “Come on. Be real. It’s getting darker and colder by the second.”

He wraps his arms around his body and hops in place. I remember he doesn’t have on his coat. Lucky for him, Old Navy fleeces are warm enough. At that moment, a wolf sounds off in the distance, reminding me of the one I found before the whiteout. I wonder if the wolf died of being cold. I suddenly feel like I want to lie down, sleep, and dream of a warm, cozy place.

I close my eyes as I talk. “How deep?”

Wyn gets on his hands and knees. “About eight feet. It was already hollowed out because of the tree roots.”

I nod, still trembling. “Will it hold?”

He pushes down on it. “Seems sturdy enough.”

“Line it.”

I try to stand so he can get the tarp from under me, but my legs are like noodles and won’t hold my weight. Wyn helps me to my feet and props me against the tree. He quickly crawls inside the cave, dragging the tarp behind him. I glance up at the sky. Huge dark clouds are rolling in, and the snowflakes are getting larger. It could dump on us at any minute.

My legs and feet are so cold, my body stings. My mind seems to be getting foggier. I start to lie down in the snow, but Wyn is in front of me in a second. He snaps his fingers in front of my face, causing my eyes to pop open.

“Hey, G. Come on, stay with me. Let’s get you inside. It’s good enough.”

He drapes my arm around his neck and drags me to the opening. My whole body screams out in pain as if my muscles are angry and lashing out. I squat down and force myself to crawl in. Once inside, my body collapses onto the tarp. I already feel much warmer just being out of the wind, but now I just want to sleep. Wyn crawls in behind me and plugs the door with our gear.

“You okay?”

I just lay there shivering. He wraps his arms around me and starts to rub my legs and arms, trying to warm me up. My frozen body barely feels a thing.

“I just want to point out that I’m taking care of you,” he says.

I stutter. “Shhhuuuttt uuuppp.”

He smiles and continues to massage my limbs.

My mind goes in and out as I step into Stage Three hypothermia. I try to close my eyes, but Wyn shakes me.

“Listen. I don’t know much, but you said it’s not good to sleep.” I nod. He looks helpless and scared. “What can I do?”

I lie still, shivering and chattering my teeth. My thoughts goes in and out. Like I’m here but not really here. Like this is all a bad dream. Foggy and strange. Distant. Like it’s not happening to me.

“I’m…so… cold.”

“I know.” As Wyn pulls layers of clothes off his body, he explains. “I saw in a movie once that a person with hypothermia needs to be skin on skin. It warms the body faster than anything.”

Yes. Why didn’t I think of that? Because my brain is like a Slushee. Surprised he knows anything about it, I stare as he unbuttons his flannel shirt and slips it off, now wearing only a white t-shirt. He trembles from the cold.

I try to stop him, “W…W...yn.” But that’s the only word my mouth will form.

He cups my face. “G, you have to get warm. You don’t look good.”

And I know he’s right. It’s our last option. To strip down and get warm from direct body heat. I manage to nod and try to take off my coat, but I can’t seem to get my fingers to bend.

“I’ll do it.” He comes over to me and unzips my coat.

I can feel his breath on my forehead as he slides my stiff arms out of the sleeves. I can’t help but remember being this close to Mo when we were camping, how I would lie next to him, feeling his warmth from behind. I push Mo out of my mind as Wyn unzips my sweatshirt. I look up at him but his face is serious and pinched as he concentrates on what he’s doing.

Saving my life.

I try to help by unbuttoning my shirt, but my fingers won’t work together. He cups my hands and blows before rubbing them between his palms. Then he unbuttons my shirt. My vision goes in and out as I feel my shirt slip off me. He lays me on my back and unzips my pants.

Suddenly, I’m back at Mo’s camp. His arms wrapping around me as he kisses my neck and shoulders. I remember his lips being so soft and silky. How they would slide over mine like lip gloss.

Wyn’s voice brings me back. “Stay with me, Grace.”

He works faster now and slips off my cargo pants, leaving me in nothing but my Paul Frank undies and sports bra. He takes off his t-shirt and then slowly lies down next to me, pressing his chest against my back. I shiver violently next to him. Almost convulsing.

He wraps his arms around me and pulls me close. I immediately feel warmer and snuggle into him, pressing my cold body against his warm one. He reaches over me and wraps the tarp around us tight, like a human burrito. His body heat draws me in, and I roll over to face him, letting my body melt.

Soon, I can feel my body thawing. I become crazed for more warmth and slide into him more, getting closer by entwining my legs through his. Soon, my body stops trembling so much, and Wyn rubs my back. His heart beats against my chest as I bury my face in his neck, smelling his aftershave. He rubs my arms and legs, giving me permanent chill bumps.

But it’s not enough. My mind goes foggy and once again everything around me blurs.

Suddenly, I’m back in the woods again. With Mo. We’re hugging each other but he’s asleep next to me. I’m lying still, listening to the night noises, the cicadas and the frogs. But mostly, I’m listening to the rhythm of his breath in my ear as he sleeps under the stars. I can’t help but touch his face.

He opens his eyes and tucks my hair behind my ear.

I hear myself whisper, “I miss you.”

“I’m here,” he says.

He slides on top of me, molding us into one person. My breathing quickens, and I hear myself moan a little when our mouths finally meet. His lips lightly press on mine. His breath fills my mouth, giving me no desire to breathe on my own. My body goes warm inside as his lips glide over mine. I taste almonds and remember what it was like to be with him, why I’ve missed him so much. He made me feel so open and so alive.

I open my mouth and wait for his tongue to find its way in. I wrap my arms around his neck, pulling him closer and closer, so we will never be apart again. We are kissing passionately, and his hands are all over me, touching me.

His body presses into mine as we fit perfectly together, piece by piece. He kisses my neck and every space on my shoulders. I want nothing more than to make love to Mo tonight. For the first time in my life to finally be with someone like that.

I start to cry. Mo’s back, and I’m finally home again. Where I belong. I open my eyes and search the foggy world for his beautiful face. His smile. His dark-chocolaty eyes.

“I love you.” I whisper.

Wyn’s face appears in my blurry view, and he kisses me lightly. “I love you too, Grace.”

Survival Skill #14

If you think you have hypothermia, seek medical help to be checked for frostbite and receive external warming

I
bolt upright and hit my head on the low, icy ceiling. “Ouch!”

I’m no longer shivering, but my whole body aches and throbs as if someone has thrown me around the small cave. It takes me a minute to remember where I am and what has happened.

I’m out in the wilderness. In a cozy snow cave. I glance to my right and sigh. Only I’m not with Mo; I’m with Wyn. Slivers of memories from the previous night piece together in my mind. The shivering, being so cold, the fever. The kissing. As soon as it all floods back, I glance down at my body, barely wrapped in underwear and a bra. Thank God, I’m still somewhat clothed.

Wyn is sleeping with a slight smile on his lips. He looks much younger than usual. That baby face. At some point in the middle of the night, he’d gotten dressed, leaving me to believe nothing happened. Thank God.

I quickly pull on my pants and shirt. Then I sit there quietly, staring out the hole into the bright sun as everything replays in my head.

What have I done? I hit my palm against my forehead a few times. How could I? Kissing Wyn was a huge mistake, and this time it might cost me my friendship for good. I rub my temples. How am I going to fix this mess? Can I? Will he ever forgive me if I reject him again?

All I remember is being so confused last night, and my head being so mucky. Like a swamp. For a while there, I really thought Mo was with me. That he had come back. My heart grows heavy, remembering how wonderful it felt thinking we were together again. I’ve tried so hard to block him from my mind, but now I miss him more than ever.

I sigh and glance back at Wyn. Poor guy. He probably thinks I meant all that for him; that I feel that way about him. He doesn’t realize how bad the side effects of hypothermia can get. Delirium and hallucinations are quite common. I was not coherent enough to stop it from happening. But he doesn’t get that. How am I going to explain this to him?
I kissed you because I thought you were Mo. I only said those things because I was temporarily insane
. Nice, Grace.

Wyn sits up next to me and strokes my hair. “Good morning, beautiful.”

In my head, I hear Mo’s voice say
Blossom
. I flinch and shake away the thought. I try not to jerk away from Wyn’s touch and mumble, “Hey you.”