Unravel (30 page)

I lifted my hips. His dick brushed against my thigh.

That wicked smile faded.

He pushed himself inside me slowly. Making me feel every single inch. My mouth parted. My eyelids fluttered shut. This felt too good.

I waited for him to move, but he stopped. His hand curved around my jaw, forcing me to look at him. And I realized he wanted to watch me. He wanted to watch my reaction as he moved inside me for the first time.

“Move,” I panted. “You have to move.”

I thought he was going to make me beg. And, honestly, I knew I would. Lachlan could get me to do just about anything.

“Lachlan,” I gasped. “Move.”

He finally gave me what I wanted. I felt relief, only for a second. He started to slide in and out of me faster. Just when I would start to find his rhythm, he would move his hips and my mind would black out.

He kissed me hard on the mouth in a kiss that wasn’t meant to be sweet, but a kiss that was meant to brand me forever.

I was his.

The tree bark dug into my skin and it fueled me to arch my back, and tighten my legs.

My head turned. I saw our shadows slanted across the grass. I blinked a few times, finding it impossible to accept that this was us. The man’s hands were above her head, leaning against the tree for leverage. His knees were slightly bent as he rocked into her. They found a rhythm. Her head tipped back and she tightened her body around him like a second skin. Her hand curved around his neck before they drifted over broad shoulders and to his back. Her fingers sank into his soft skin and when he withdrew she dragged them across his skin, knowing that there would be claw marks left behind. Their bodies never broke contact.

The scent of sweat lingered in the air. That didn’t stop them. Nothing would stop them. They would keep moving, keep finding new places to touch each other just as long as this feeling never faded away. “God, I love you,” he said in a low voice.

His words slipped past my skin, ran through my veins and went straight to my heart.

My skin started to tingle, until it felt alive. Tears welled up in my eyes.
Stay, stay, stay,
I thought to myself frantically. I didn’t want this feeling to leave me. I tried to pace myself, but it was futile. I was past that mark. My muscles tightened and my eyes shot open and above me the sky blurred into a gray mist. My body felt incredible, almost weightless.

The sensations started to ebb, making me feel boneless.

My head dropped to his shoulders and I held on as Lachlan moved inside me with frantic thrusts before the heels of his feet lifted off the ground and held his body in place for a second. His head was back, giving me a view of his jaw and neck. He shouted incoherently, his body shuddered. I smiled faintly and kissed his shoulder.

I felt his heart beating violently.

His head dropped onto my shoulder. I heard him say again against my skin, “God, I love you.” I curled my fingers into his hair.

He held me because I couldn’t move. I felt like a rag doll. My legs and arms still dangling around him.

When my heartbeat started to slow, he finally released me. My feet touched the ground. I stumbled a few steps away, like I had forgotten how to walk.

I fixed my clothes and the whole time Lachlan stood perfectly still. His chest heaved and his head rested against the tree.

I slid the last button in place and swallowed. “Please don’t tell me you regret it,” I said tentatively.

His eyes closed as if he was in pain. He straightened and tossed the condom off and buttoned up his pants. He finally saw his wallet on the ground. He frowned at it like he had no idea how it got there.

“I probably should, shouldn’t I? But I can’t.” He pointed to where the two of us had been entwined. “I’ll never regret that.”

“Then why do you look like that?”

He grabbed his shirt and put it on with quick, angry jerks. It slid in place and he stared at me with shock.

“I’m not finished!” He exploded.

I stopped in my tracks, my eyes wide.

“You’re leaving here and I’m so fucking proud of you,” he whispered. “But if tonight showed me anything, it’s that I love you and I’m never going to get you out of my system.”

My lips parted but I didn’t say a thing. I was still reeling from his words.
I love you
coming from Lachlan would never get old. Those three words sent a jolt through my body.

He laughed humorlessly. “I don’t want to let you go.”

I didn’t want him to let me go. I wanted to stay beside him for the rest of my life. I didn’t tell him how I felt though. That small voice in my head whispered to me, telling me that the minute I said what I wanted, it would never come true.

I walked over to him, my arms wrapping around his waist. My face was bent, looking up at him. He leaned down, his lips moving slowly over mine. Everything I didn’t say, I poured into that kiss. Lachlan responded back, holding me so tightly I could barely breathe.

I pulled back first.

“We should get back,” I said with regret.

I held out my hand. He grabbed it, swallowing it within his own. I always had to keep up with his long strides, but tonight he walked slowly. The grass crunched underneath our feet.

“I’m nervous,” I said.

“About leaving McLean?”

“About leaving you. McLean. Everything I know,” I admitted.

He squeezed my hand. “Don’t worry, you’re gonna be fine.”

“I don’t know if it’s normal to feel this nervous.”

“You’re starting a new chapter, of course it’s normal.”

I wanted to ask him if he would visit me.

I was afraid to be somewhere without him. Even when he was away from McLean, I still had the comfort of the treehouse and the memories of us. If I left, I was afraid my memories would stay behind.

His house came into sight. The lights were on and I saw shadows moving within. My grip tightened. I wasn’t ready for him to go. “Have you seen your parents yet?”

“Just for a second. I dropped my bags off and came to you.”

I smiled. I was his first priority.

We reached the tall oak tree. Both of us stared up at the treehouse. Throughout the years Lachlan’s dad had replaced rotted out boards, but the years were starting to take their toll.

Something was so final about tonight. It felt like I was closing a chapter of my childhood. No more late nights, sitting in the treehouse and spilling my heart out to Lachlan.

The wind picked up. I blamed it for the tears in my eyes.

“Lachlan?” his mom said.

Lachlan shot me a look. We didn’t want tonight to end and we definitely didn’t want someone else interrupting us.

Lachlan let go of my hand. “Stay,” he mouthed before he walked up to the deck. I stood behind the oak tree, like an escapee. I peeked and watched Lachlan and Magy.

“Mama,” he greeted.

The two of them hugged and she gave him a kiss on the cheek before she pulled back to look at him.

I loved the way Magy Halstead loved her son. It shined in her eyes and the way she talked to him. She was a small woman that came up to Lachlan’s shoulders. Even though she was small, she was fierce. No one went up against her.

Every time I saw her, she always said
hi
, but she would look at me very carefully, like she could see past my eyes to what was really inside of me.

It always scared the shit out of me.

“Your dad said your flight landed hours ago,” Magy said. “Where have you been?”

“I was with Naomi.”

Magy said nothing. I watched as her lips thinned in disapproval. “How is she?” she asked tightly.

“Good.” Lachlan crossed his arms and leaned back against the railing. “She’s leaving for college soon.”

“That’s great,” she murmured.

Great for Magy, maybe.

“Of course,” Lachlan said. “I’m really proud of her.”

The two of them were silent. Magy stared out before she walked over to him and mimicked her son’s actions.

“I remember how she would always be up in the treehouse, always creating stories about getting away.”

Lachlan looked over at his mom. “You heard all that?”

“Of course. My bedroom window was open in the summer. I always heard you two.”

Lachlan grinned. I tapped my head against the tree and grimaced with embarrassment.

“You didn’t think she would get out of McLean?”

“I had my doubts,” she said honestly.

I watched Lachlan’s shoulders stiffen.

“Why?” he said.

“Lachlan…” she sighed. “I don’t know if she can stay that far from you. From the minute she saw you she instantly had a crush on you that’s grown into love and a level of attachment that sometimes makes me wonder.”

Lachlan stood straighter. His head tilted imperceptibly in my direction. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Magy looked at her son carefully. “And I think somehow along the way she got ahold of you.” She reached out and tapped her hand on Lachlan’s chest, right where his heart beats. “She still has a piece of you.”

He didn’t lie or make up excuses. He faced his mom and said in a deep and steady voice, “I love her.”

She didn’t argue or try to prove Lachlan wrong. Instead, she nodded and pursed her lips in thought.

“Describe it to me,” she said suddenly. “Describe your love for her.”

“Mama…” Lachlan said. Magy wouldn’t budge. She stood there, waiting for her son to answer. “What you’re asking me to describe… I can’t. It’s like asking me to describe fresh water. I need it to live. I need her to live.”

Magy took a deep breath. “I like Naomi,” she said casually.

I wanted to snort. Even Lachlan looked at his mom skeptically.

“I do,” she insisted. “But this has nothing to do with liking her. It’s the fact that she has a level of need for you that is so intense and powerful that nothing can shake it. I just don’t think you realize how much of yourself you’ll have to give to be with her.”

“Why are you saying this?”

Magy was silent. She crossed her arms and leaned against the rail. “When you really love someone… you’re in it for life. It’s so easy to use that four-letter word at the beginning, where everything is so simple and perfect. If Naomi loves you like I think she does, then you need to be there no matter what. Her happiness, fear, and pain—even her thoughts—become yours and you need to do everything to make sure it stays that way.”

My eyes widened, completely shocked that Magy Halstead had just uttered those words.

“I’m not going to run,” Lachlan vowed.

“Good.” As an afterthought she added, “Don’t let her down.”

“I won’t.”

Her lips pulled up at the corners and she hugged Lachlan. “Good to have you home, honey.” Before she turned away, she looked over Lachlan’s shoulder, and directly at me.

I stood there, just waiting for her to call out my name. But she turned and walked inside.

The door clicked shut.

Lachlan was frozen, like he was carved from stone. I came out from my hiding place and walked toward him. He stared out into the fields with a faraway look in his eyes. I stood next to him and rested my head against his arm.

“I know you heard,” he said.

“Every single word.”

He looked at me with regret. “My mom, she was just—”

“Being a mom,” I finished for him. “She was right in everything she said.”

He looked at me thoughtfully and said very quietly, “I do love you.”

I smiled faintly. “I love you too… but love doesn’t solve everything. So where do we go from here?”

Lachlan closed his eyes and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “I can’t ask you to stay in McLean. You deserve to get away and have that college experience…” He let his words linger. And I hoped that whatever he said next wouldn’t tear my heart to shreds.

“So you’re going to go off to college, and I’m going to be here, waiting.”

“In Mclean?”

Lachlan nodded. “After my internship, I was only supposed to be in Pittsburgh for a year. That year is almost over with and then I’ll come back home.”

I knew that. I just didn’t know the part about McLean. I laughed at the irony. The world was playing a cruel joke on the two of us. Right when we decide to give this—
us
—a try, one of us had to leave.

My laughter died and my heart ached. I stared at him with a look of devastation. He opened his arms and I walked into his embrace willingly.

“I promise,” he whispered into my ear, “I’ll be here.”

Late Sunday night, Lachlan drops me back off at Fairfax. We sit in his car, right outside of the front doors. I stare down at my hands, not wanting to go inside.

This weekend has been exhilarating; a breath of fresh air for me that I didn’t think I would ever have. It was ending too quickly. It felt like Lachlan was just picking me up for the weekend only a few minutes ago.

“I don’t want to do this,” Lachlan mutters.

My hands are shaking. I bite down on my lower lip and try my hardest not to cry.

“This was good for you, right?” Lachlan pivots in his seat and it causes his scent to drift over me. My resolve crumbles. A tear slides down my cheek. “Getting away was nice?” he says.

“I loved every second,” I whisper brokenly.

“So did I.” Lachlan leans closer, reaches out and grabs my hand. “I need you to go back in there and get better. You have no idea how bad I want to drive away right now with you in the car. Last night I thought about where we could go. Maybe go all the way to Maine. Or Florida?” He smiles. “But I could never finish the thought. I’d be too fucking selfish to take you away right now. I know you can do this. Okay?”