Unstoppable (15 page)

I feel badly for those who don’t believe in heaven. The thought that we only get one brief shot at life is pretty depressing. I want to live billions of years and into eternity. While I’m in this life, I try to have an impact that will last just as long. It won’t matter how much money I’ve made or how many nice cars I’ve owned. What will matter is that I’ve reached out to someone and served a purpose greater than my own.

I don’t believe God uses sickness to punish us, but I do believe He uses it to send a message that we need to hear. When His friend Lazarus was sick and dying, Jesus said, “This sickness is not unto death, but for the glory of God, that the Son of God might be glorified thereby.”

When Jesus allowed Lazarus to die and then raised him from the dead, many doubters finally accepted that Jesus was the Son of God.

Could it be possible that our sicknesses or disabilities somehow serve God’s purpose? I certainly have seen this with my lack of limbs, which has allowed me to serve others through my evangelism and also simply through my example. I think about how much easier it would have been on my parents if they’d known someone else with no arms or legs that could guide them and give them hope when I was born. I’ve been blessed to serve in that role for many men, women, and children with disabilities similar to mine. My parents have done the same, advising families and assuring them that their children without limbs can cope and thrive. If we do nothing else in our lives, to give some peace of mind and encouragement to others is a wonderful gift.

Michelle, a California mother, sent me one of the many e-mails that both confirm my purpose and humble me because I am reminded of how many people have overcome far greater challenges than I have. Michelle has triplets. One of them, Grace, was born at twenty-eight weeks’ gestation with mild cerebral palsy, which affects her ability to walk. She also is blind in her right eye. Even with her physical challenges, Grace is a good student in mainstream classes, and even better, she has a strong faith. While Grace never seems to engage in pity parties for herself, Michelle has been asked the “Why me?” question.

You can hardly blame Grace or anyone for asking that when faced with severe disabilities or health challenges. I’ve often spoken and written about how my own mum responded to that difficult question. Michelle had read my first book and watched my videos, so she used her own version of my mum’s response to guide her when Grace asked the “Why me?” question like I had.

“I told her, ‘Because God will use you somewhere, when the time is right, to inspire people to turn to Jesus Christ!’ ” Michelle wrote. “I actually told her it was a kind of gift—to know your purpose so early on. I know some adults who still fail miserably to find it!”

Michelle said Grace listens to my videos to confirm that message, and she takes my photograph to school to inspire other kids that “nothing is impossible with God at your side!” According to Michelle, Grace has a renewed faith and loves God very deeply, even with all her disabilities.

“I sometimes suspect I am entertaining an angel,” Michelle wrote.

Miracles come in many forms. You’ll have to excuse me for believing that God’s use of me as a tool for helping people like Grace is a miracle of some kind. If this were the only time someone had contacted me with this sort of message, I would consider it the gift of a lifetime, but day after day the letters, e-mails, and messages come in. Many of the people send them to thank me, but really I have to thank them for inspiring me with their strength and the power of their unstoppable faith.

Some of their messages are just incredible for the way they demonstrate faith in action applied to illness and disabilities. Adrianna certainly blew me away. She is a twenty-five-year-old who, like me, was born without arms or legs, but she does have hands and feet.

“God has shown me how to thrive and to know that I’m an equal despite my severe limitations. Like Nick, I struggle every day with daily tasks,
but with strength I look on the bright side of life.… Through Jesus, God gave millions of miracles and healings to the world. God is real, and as an example of
Him
, I’m one of
His
children.”

Adrianna spent her first three years on life support because she had trouble breathing on her own as an infant. Like me, she has back problems, but she’s had two spinal operations to insert steel rods on each side of her spine. Still, this amazing young woman focuses on her blessings rather than her burdens.

“I only have hands and feet, but I’m smart and have many great friends and family in my life. I also go to college so I can become a counselor. God does miraculous things in life, and I am one of the miracles. Life can be good if we choose it to be good,” she wrote.

Adrianna has many challenges, but she has rejected bitterness and self-pity. She remains in faith, positive, and a force for goodness in this world. She inspires me, and I hope her words inspire you too.

In Psalm 119, King David offered lessons on putting faith in action when faced with afflictions and other adversities. David wrote that before he’d become ill, he’d gone astray and that it was good for him to be afflicted because it made him return to God’s laws.

My parents taught me that I should love God, not so He will protect me or give me arms and legs, but because knowing Him will lead me to life in heaven and a full life no matter what. When you are stricken with illness, disability, or other challenges, pray to be closer to God so that He can do what is best for you. This approach acknowledges that you may not know what is best, but God does. It also acknowledges that you don’t have it in your power to heal yourself, but God does. When you pray in that way, you are putting your faith into action by putting all your hope in God’s promises, which include this one: “ ‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’ ”

It’s always a good idea to pray and remind God of promises He’s made to us. I recommend large doses of prayer each day. I think they are the most powerful medicine of all. And there are other things you can do while waiting for God to reveal His plans for you.

From my own experience I know that being disabled, very sick, or suffering from injuries can stir up fear. You may also feel isolated, lonely, and stressed out. My worst times were often those in which I chose to go off on my own rather than to be consoled and cared for by those who loved me.
Don’t make that mistake. If there are people in your life willing to be there for you, accept their support graciously and with gratitude. Tell them that you hope one day you can be as good a friend to them as they’ve been to you, and then give them the opportunity to help you as much as they are willing to help.

If you aren’t surrounded by family and friends who can comfort you, seek out professionals, a church, or other support groups. Your doctors and other health-care providers can help you find them. There are support groups for most major illnesses and medical problems, and there are also more general groups that can offer help in dealing with any serious illness.

One thing I would caution you about is that when you face an overwhelming medical problem, you may find yourself totally caught up in dealing with it, so being ill and getting healthy again are all you think about. Professional counselors say that it is important to accept and manage your illness, but it is equally important to remember that you are still
you
. Don’t abandon the things you love to do or the people you love to be with because you want to focus exclusively on restoring your health. The health challenge has happened to you, but don’t let it take over your life or damage your sense of yourself and the value you bring into the world. You are more than this challenge.

Some days will be worse than others. You may lose ground before you can move ahead. You may have to concede to the physical pain now and then, but don’t give up emotionally or spiritually. Stay strong in your optimism and your faith. Keep your sense of humor and your mind sharp, and look for moments in each day when you can find peace and joy, whether it’s just the quiet of early morning or the joy of having another day, perfect or imperfect, to share with the people you love.

When I write or speak and describe my life as “ridiculously good,” I’m referring to the joy that I take in each and every day. Whether the weather is beautiful or nasty, whether things go smoothly or every bad thing imaginable hits, whether I’m home with loved ones or on the road among strangers, whether I’m feeling fit or sick as a dog, life is just
ridiculous
.

You can’t expect every day to make sense. Sometimes your days are just comical. Other days are tragic. But for better or worse, in sickness and health, good or bad, it is just ridiculous that we are alive and breathing, isn’t it? Life itself is a miracle. You and I only get one ride on what Shakespeare called “this mortal coil,” so what will you do on yours? Will you allow poor health, a bad injury, or a disability to take even a drop of joy out of your one chance at life on earth? I suggest instead that you go for an upward spiral. If you are put flat on your back by health problems or slowed down by a disability, take the opportunity to make sure your priorities are in order, let those you care about know how much you love them, and strengthen your faith.

There is always the possibility that God has put this challenge in your life to make you stronger, more loving, more courageous, more determined, and more faith filled. So take that possibility and run with it. Your body may be down and out, but you can still let your imagination and spirit go wherever you want to go. Maybe you’ve been too busy to upgrade your account, bolster your character, and clear out the deadwood. Now is the time to read the Bible and other books that fulfill and sustain you between treatments or visits from the nurses and nurse’s aides and doctors and technicians. Work on healing and strengthening those parts they can’t reach. Decide that no matter what happens with your body, the rest of you—your mind, spirit, and soul—will come through this restored and improved. Ask God for that gift of faith.

Of course, if you have a lethal illness or disability like mine, there is no recovery. There is just the rest of your life. You either bail out on the time you have remaining and succumb to self-pity, bitterness, and anger, or you accept the challenge and make the absolute most of this God-given opportunity to do your best while the clock ticks down.

I have received a fair amount of attention and appreciation for the way in which I’ve chosen to live and to serve others despite my lack of limbs, but there are so many more people out there quietly meeting the challenge of their own illnesses and disabilities with grace, courage, and inspiring faith.

Rebekah Tolbert was born with far more challenging health problems and disabilities than mine. She was born as a fragile premature baby, delivered under emergency conditions to a family haunted by domestic violence. She weighed less than three pounds at birth but clung ferociously to life. Yet each day she endured seemed to bring more challenges.

Eventually, Rebekah was diagnosed with spastic quadriplegic cerebral palsy. Her parents divorced, but her mother, Laurena, instilled Rebekah with the knowledge that her family and her God loved her.

Filled with faith, Rebekah grew up with an amazing spirit and a cheerful, positive demeanor. Rather than feeling like a victim, she became a conqueror of challenges and a healer for others. While still in grade school, Rebekah mounted her own campaign to raise funds for Afghan refugees. She collected pledges for donations based on each pedal rotation of her custom tricycle and then rode far enough to raise more than fifteen hundred dollars for her cause.

She adopted her grandmother’s favorite Bible verse, Ephesians 3:20:
“Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.”

For a high school class project, Rebekah partnered with Wheels for the World and put together a community drive to collect used wheelchairs and other medical equipment for victims of the 2010 Haiti earthquake. Her positive attitude and enthusiasm for life won her many new friends in school. She reached out to people, and most of them responded to her outgoing personality.

But then Rebekah experienced challenges similar to those that I had around the same age. High school is the time when you become aware of your differences, and then you spend the rest of your life realizing how much we are all the same. The teen years can be challenging for anyone, and they are especially challenging for those of us who have disabilities.

When your mind and your body are maturing and changing rapidly, there are chemical changes in the body that also contribute to heightened emotions. It’s a volatile environment because your classmates and friends are going through the same changes. Everyone is trying to figure out how to fit in, where to fit in, and what the future holds.

At that age I came to the realization that there were just some things that my classmates could do that even with all my determination and faith, I could not accomplish. I also experienced bullying and cruelty from other students during my teen years. Even though it usually was just a thoughtless comment or someone’s lame attempt at humor, I struggled with hurt feelings and self-doubt.