Unwanted Fate (11 page)

“Hey, yourself. I was calling to see what time you have class tomorrow.”

“I have class until one, why?”

“Want to meet at the house around one thirty then?”

“That’s fine.”

“Great. So…any change?”

“None. They keep asking me what we want to do.”

“Seriously? Do I need to come to the hospital?”

“No, I will get them to chill until tomorrow evening. I told them we were trying to find his will.”

“If they get too pushy, let me know.”

“I will.”

“If anything changes between now and tomorrow, call me, okay? If not, I’ll see you tomorrow at one thirty.”

“All right. Night Patrick. Love you.”

“Love you too, squirt.” She laughs at my childhood nickname for her and hangs up the phone.

I go to the files I have open and check the numbers I have, because I want to be able to give everything to Kristin in the morning to make the finalized file.

My growling stomach interrupts my thoughts and I decide to call it quits for the night. I go to the kitchen and try to find something to eat. When was the last time I actually went to the grocery store? Last month, maybe it was two months ago. Looks like I need to pick up a few things and at least get food for the freezer. I find a can of Campbell’s Chicken Noodle Soup in the cabinet and look for a bowl to put it in to heat up in the microwave.

I sit at the bar, eating my chicken noodles, and think about how good it’s going to be to actually sleep in bed, again. My eyes are drooping by the time I finish the soup, and I decide not to even bother with a shower. I strip my clothes as I make my way to the bedroom and fall into bed, thinking about Emily as my head hits the pillow, and I drift to sleep.

W
ho’s shining that light in my eyes? I open one eye to see where the light is coming from and see that it’s not someone, but something. The sun. How did I not know that it shines in here? Why hadn’t I noticed that before? Because I’ve never slept in here that long. Shit! What time is it? I rummage around in the bedsheets, feeling for my cell phone, and I find it. I put it up to my face to see that it’s a quarter after seven and my phone is almost dead. Damn it.

I look for a charger and send Kristin a text that I will be in after nine, which is almost a never for me. There’s no sense of rushing. I would be rushing to sit in rush hour traffic. I stretch my body, and I feel rested. I can’t remember the last time I slept through the night without waking up at five in the morning or without the sleep being from being drunk.

What was I thinking about when I went to sleep last night? Emily Janes. What is it about her? The newness of her is pulling me in. No. There is something else. She calms me. The rage is quiet when she’s near, and I can be me around her. The guy no one sees except Addison.

I go to the closet and grab jeans, a dress shirt and a sports coat, and place them on the clothes rack outside of the bathroom. When I go over to my father’s house, I don’t want to be uncomfortable. I walk in the bathroom and turn on the shower, and jump in the shower, hurrying.

Almost two hours later, I’m walking up the flights of stairs to my office. I make it to the floor and I’m almost to Kristin’s desk when she sees me. Her face lights up in a smile.

“I see you got some rest?”

“I did. Thank you. I have the files we’ve been working on ready, and I have a new one for you too. When you can, come into my office and we will get to the paperwork.”

“I’ll be in a few moments. Do you want coffee?”

“Please. Thank you.” I walk into my office, leaving the door open.

Before I can get my computer screen on, Kristin is in my office with coffee and a notepad, ready to write down what I need her to do. I’m so glad she’s
my
assistant.

“First off, I’m leaving around one. I’m going to help Addison look through our father’s papers to hopefully find a will or something.”

“Okay, will you be gone all afternoon?”

“I’m not sure, but if Kane or someone else needs me, call me please and I’ll come in. I think several people are on vacation this week, so it’s been quiet.”

“Will do.”

“Second, I reran some figures and I think I’ve narrowed it down to two organizations I want to work with.” I open my briefcase and hand her the file. “All of my notes are in there, please make the adjustments to the permanent file, and send it to Kane.”

“Okay, I’ll double check all the figures too, and if I see any issue, I’ll let you know.”

“Perfect. This new file, we already have a file on the center, but this is specifically for their outreach program. I need to see if there is going to be a problem since we’ve already made a larger grant to them if we make a smaller grant as well.” I go over the details of new grant paperwork and whom the grant will be benefiting, and I talk about the center and Emily.

I look at Kristin and notice she’s looking at me strangely.

“Did I spill coffee on me?” I look down and make sure I didn’t carelessly spill it on me while I was talking.

“No. I’ve never seen that look on your face when talking about a woman.”

“Um. What look?”

“The look of you might like her.”

“I do like her. She’s an inspiration to be around.”

“Not that kind of like, Patrick.”

“Oh.”

“Speechless? I do think you’re smitten with Ms. Janes. And if she can put a smile on your face, I’m all for it.” She smiles. “Anything else I need to do?”

“No, that’s all for now.”

“I’ll be at my desk if you need anything further.”

“Thank you, Kristin.”

“You’re welcome.” She smiles and exits the office, closing the door behind her, and her statement makes me question myself.

Does Emily besot me? I have my answer instantly, without a doubt. She’s someone who I find fully engaging, someone who I enjoy having a conversation with, someone who I’d want to be around more than just for sex.

I chuckle at the last thought, because it’s been a while for sex or anything sexually stimulating. The last time I had a steady girlfriend was college…five or six years ago, I think. This company became everything, my life, and honestly, I wouldn’t change it. If I would do a better job of balancing my personal life and business life, then maybe I could have a steady relationship, a relationship with someone like Emily.

She seems like the type of person that would understand that it takes hard work and long hours to accomplish goals in the business world. Several of the women I dated in college where high maintenance. I mean I enjoy looking at a woman who takes pride in their appearance, but when they call or text every ten minutes or expect gifts all the time, it’s too much. Way too much for me.

I’m sure that’s partly because of the way I grew up. I don’t ever remember my father getting my mom anything, but he isn’t the best example to use of how a man should treat a woman… Enough of thinking about women, my father, and life. I need to get things completed so I can leave in a few hours.

T
he house I spent the first eighteen years of my life still looks the same as I pull up in front of the dilapidated structure. The sage colored paint is fading and the roof needs to be replaced. The house hasn’t changed at all in nine years. I haven’t been back since I left. As I sit in my car waiting for Addison to arrive, I review the files that Kristin emailed me to review.

She’s finished the file for Project Hope Outreach Program and it’s flawless. There shouldn’t be an issue getting it approved by the board. I check a few other emails, nothing that needs an immediate reply and I can address them tomorrow.

I push the power button, turning the screen off on my phone and look in my rearview mirror to see Addison pulling in behind me. Perfect timing. I get out of my car and wait for her by the rear of my car.

“Hey, sis. How was class,” I ask as we walk toward the house.

“Easy day. Math and English.” She grins. “You know that stuff you don’t know.” She sticks her tongue out at me.

“Don’t call me when you can’t figure out how to use the quadratic equation,” I deadpan.

“The quadi what?” she says, confused because she’s not a math person at all.

“I suggest you refer to me the math king.”

“Yeah, yeah. I could call you Paddycakes and you’d still help me.” I laugh because when she was little she called me her Paddycakes because I used to sing the nursery rhyme to her.

“You’re probably right.” I gently bump into her while walking to the front of the house.

“Are you okay being here?” She looks a little worried when we reach the door.

“Yes, I’m fine. Let’s get inside so I can get in and get out of here.

“Okay.” She unlocks the door and the familiar mustiness of the old house hits my nose. The smell is one I’ll never forget.

“Everything in the same place?” I ask before I head to the right.

“Yes, nothing has changed. Even your room is still the same. I’ll begin in his bedroom. He keeps things in there too.” I nod and head to his office.

When the man was sober, he was meticulous and brilliant with numbers, and kept everything organized in his office. I’m sure he’s where I get my love of math from, but I think that’s all. He loved women and alcohol more than his family, actually I think just me because Addison said he’s fatherly to her. I’d still like to know what I did to him to get him to hate me so much.

The room smells like stale cigarettes as I enter—this is the only room he smokes in.
You’re worthless,
echoes in my head as I look around, and everything has a thin coating of sticky tar. I can’t wait to get out of here, away from the voice. Around the room are bankers boxes and each one is labeled with a year, some boxes have multiple years.

I don’t remember seeing these boxes in here, but this room was off limits to my sister and me unless we were in here with dad, and I could have easily missed them. Sitting down in the old brown leather chair at the desk, I swivel the chair around and open the box closest to me, a box from six years ago.

As I look into the box and look through the papers, I see they aren’t what I am looking for. Instead, the box holds newspaper clipping from when I was college and what looks like to be letters. I pull one out of the envelope and read it…it’s a letter from the Carlino’s to my father, letting him know how I was doing.

They kept in touch with my father? How did I not know? I don’t know if I should be angry or happy right now. I return everything to the box and put the lid back on. I grab another box, the year I graduated from high school. The contents are the same as the first box. I put it down and go to another box, but the year is labeled with an A. Inside the box is Addison’s school work and accomplishments.

He saved everything? I don’t understand. He kept track of me even though he hated me? I’m at a loss right now.

“Addison?” I yell for her. A few moment pass and I can hear her running down the stairs.

“You yelled?”

“Yeah. Have you looked through these boxes?”

“Nooo. I didn’t even know they were in here.” She tilts her head to the side with a
what the hell
expression on her face.

“So they are new?” I question.