Vacation to Die For (2 page)

I’ve got to work fast, which means dosing Teddy’s water with a little SP-117, Russian Intelligence’s answer to the Roofie. It has the added effect that the victim readily answers any and all questions put to him. When he comes to, he won’t remember a thing.

I’ve just put an eyedropper full of the stuff in Teddy’s glass of water when I hear a floorboard squeak behind me. 

Teddy is reflected in the black glass door of the microwave.

Our eyes meet for a nanosecond.

Oh, hell. He knows.

The realization that I am the only thing standing between him and a super obnoxious life of wealth is suddenly stronger than his fear of flying. He grabs a knife from a silver platter laden with brie, crackers and grapes and slashes out at me

I break his jab with a raised arm, and  counter with a front kick that catches him in the gut. 

He reels backward, slamming into a cabinet so hard that it overturns. We’re now dancing on shattered glass and broken china. 

When Teddy lunges at me again with the knife, I dodge his first stab, but the second one cuts the top of my boot as my sidekick barely misses him. 

Okay, now I’m pissed off. Hello? These boots are 
vintage
.

I grab a beveled beer stein and slam it on to the counter so that what’s left is just the base and a jagged shard. Yep, that’ll do.

 We circle the main cabin, assessing each other. On his side of the balance sheet is his height, weight, strength—not to mention his desire to live to see a couple of big paydays. 

I’ve got speed. Most importantly, I have fear—

That I’ll be leaving my three children without a mother.

This thought alone drives my next move. I take my glass shard dagger and stab at his heart.

Teddy dodges, but he’s not quick enough. I cut his bicep. He cries out in pain, or maybe it’s at the sight of seeing his own blood. 

Angered, he rushes for me, knife in hand. He reaches me before I can grab anything to throw at him, and tosses me up against the wall. Holding the knife to my jugular, he whispers into my left ear, “You’re dead, bitch.” 

“Kick him away now, Donna—and hold on tight,” Jack whispers into my right ear.

I do exactly that—

Just as the plane goes into a sudden descent.

I’m holding tight to a drawer handle. Not Teddy. His head smacks the ceiling. 

When he hits the floor, he’s woozy, but he’s also fully aware that the plane is gliding to Earth at an angle and speed that is conducive to the term “rest in peace.”

I’m a bit perplexed myself, to say the least. Jack has left the cockpit, and he’s not smiling. After cuffing Teddy, he crouches before him and slaps his face to get his full attention. “We volunteered for this suicide mission—”

Who’s the “we” he’s referring to? 

“—because we realize the dire necessity of stopping the Chinese and Russian governments from getting their hands on our surveillance intel.” He pauses for emphasis. 

If he’s looking for a reaction, he’s getting it—from Teddy 
and
 me. Both of us are hyperventilating. 

“We are now one-hundred-and-fifteen miles from any coast, so sorry, no hope of a rescue boat. Just so you know, I’ve slowed the plane’s speed to one-hundred-forty-three miles per hour. That gives us only six minutes to impact. At this angle, the plane won’t break up upon ditching. However, the water pressure will be too much for anyone to escape either through a door or a window. Instead, water will seep in through the wheel base, and eventually we will all suffocate in a slow death.” 

“What?” I shout, “Are you crazy?”

Teddy is praying. At least, I think so, but I don’t speak gibberish, so for all I know he could be cursing at Jack.

Hell, I know I am.

“We’re now down to a little more than five minutes.”  Jack stands up with a smile. If you start talking now, Teddy, I’ll save us. If not, prepare to die.”

The wet spot on the front of Teddy’s pants is a telltale sign that he’s seriously contemplating Jack’s offer.

In case he doesn’t, I’ll do my damnedest to beat the lousy odds Jack has given us. Now let’s see, maybe the angle of the plane at landing will allow me to leap out through the aft door, which should still be above the water line. But first things first. I’ll need a flotation device—

“Donna, babe, I love you, and I made a promise to you that I’d never lie to you.”

“Yeah, yeah, thanks Jack, very comforting for me to know, in these final moments. But perhaps you could have started by informing me 
that this was a suicide mission!
” I’m looking frantically through all the bins for a parachute, a life raft--anything. 

Nothing. 

Don’t panic… Mustn’t panic…
 “Seriously, though Jack, I really think our time is better spent getting out of this hurtling aluminum can.”

“That’s just it. From the looks of things, there isn’t going to be a better ‘time,’ so please, let me get this off my chest.” He’s just standing there like a man who has made peace with himself—as opposed to me, who’s leaping through the cabin like a crazy woman. 

“What? Just say it!” At this point, I guess my only option is to tie seat cushions to my chest and around my waist. Horrible fashion statement, but hey, the sharks won’t care.  

Sharks? 

Oh… hell...

“Three minutes and fifty seconds, Teddy,” Jack says gently, as if speaking to a baby. Then he turns back to me. “Remember the Father-Daughter dance at Mary’s school last year?”

“Yes, Jack, of course! Please, get on with it. Hellzapoppin’, if you haven’t noticed.”

“I’m sure you’ll appreciate my honesty, since it’s about the neighbor you despise most, Penelope Bing. If you’ll remember, I danced with her that night. What you don’t know is that when the band was playing a tango, I dipped her, and she gave me a lip lock that trapped me like rat in a bat’s claw. Of course I pried her off as quickly as humanly possible. But still, I felt guilty that I let her get that close.”

“Given the circumstances, you’re forgiven.” Even if Jack won’t, maybe I can pull up the plane’s yoke so that it’s back on an even keel. Heck, I’ve played my son Jeff’s flight simulator video game—what’s the one? Oh yeah, 
F22 Air Dominance Fighter
. I’m sure the plane’s joy stick is about the same. 

I’m banging hard on the cockpit door, but it just won’t give. At the angle in which we’re dropping, I’m sure gravitational pull has something to do with it. There’s got to be an ice pick in the kitchen galley drawer. Maybe I can pry it open.

“And when we were embedded in Jonah Breck’s mansion—you remember, we were trying to stop the hit on Russian President Asimov,” Jack blathers on.

“Yep, saved him from three—count’em three—assassins. A career highlight, for sure.”  Yippee, I found the ice pick!

But then the plane sways in turbulence, and I drop it. I watch helplessly as it skitters under the dishwasher. In no time, I’m crawling on my hands and knees. I’ve got to retrieve it.

“Well, one night during the mission, 
Babette
—Breck’s wife—came on to me.” Jack shakes his head forlornly. “It was right after Breck found you in his office, and was all over you. Apparently she saw the videocam feed of him attacking you.” 

“Ah yes, good times.” I wish he’d quit yapping and give me a little help. His arms are longer than mine. He could reach that ice pick in a jiffy—

Wait…got it! I run to the cockpit door with it.

“I guess Babette was jealous, and was looking for a little tit for tat. More like tit for tit, from her pick-up moves, pardon the bad pun.” Jack chuckles. “Well, one thing led to another. And since our mission was to do everything we could to stay as close to the Brecks as possible—”

“You’re telling me you made love—to Babette?” I’m so shocked that I break the ice pick in the door.

Dismayed at my lack of progress, Teddy whimpers and thrashes. He looks as if he wants to throw himself out one of the airplane’s exit doors. To that extent, he’s almost ripped the chair from the floor. 

I may push him, just to put him out of his misery. 

I’ll push Jack, too, because he 
deserves
 to be miserable.

Jack snorts. “No, of course I didn’t take her up on it! All she needed was someone to listen to her. You know, a shoulder to cry on. I only kissed her on the forehead. Very brotherly. Still, I felt a little guilty that I never mentioned it to you.” 

By now the plane’s engine is sputtering. We’re dipping down. Not quite a nose dive, but the angle is something I’d expect on a rollercoaster, not flying the friendly skies. 

“Jack, you’re forgiven, okay? Capishe?” Life is too short for this stuff.

And getting shorter every second.

Oh my God! The last cabinet in the galley holds just what we need—a parachute.

But there’s only one.

Too bad. If Jack wants a ride, he’ll have to hold on for dear life.

Considering the grief he’s giving me, it’ll be a debate as to whether I’ll let him.

 “In fact, it’s why I feel at peace telling you about the biggest shame in my life—something I never told you, regarding the last time I saw Valentina.”

In unison, my jaw and the parachute drop to the ground. 

Ah. Here it is.
 

Jack’s ex, Valentina, no longer walks the earth—thanks to my ex, Carl—but her ghost still hovers between us.

Terrorism makes strange bedfellows.

Jack takes a deep breath. “You see, she and I—”

“Please,” Teddy screams. “I’ll talk! I swear!” Tears are streaming down his face. 

I can’t say that I blame him. I’d cry, too, but now I want to hear what Jack has to say. 

Teddy points out the window. 

Both Jack and I turn to see that the horizon has come into view, albeit at a cockeyed angle. We are just a few thousand feet above the water, and dropping fast. 

Teddy is hanging onto Jack’s ankles. Between sobs, he screams, “I’ve got the intel in a thumb drive. It’s waiting for me in a post office box in Quito, Ecuador.”

Jack nods. “Keep talking. Any takers for the intel?”

“Both China and Russia have agreed to deposit funds into separate Swiss bank accounts, at midnight tonight. The minute they do, the intel goes live in different secure clouds on private servers, where they can access it.”

As if he’s willed the plane to straighten up and fly right, suddenly the nose of the Gulfstream lifts very gently until it looks as if we’re gliding a hundred feet off the water’s surface, before it rises up again into the sky.

I glance out the window. “What the hell, Jack? You mean to tell me we weren’t going to die?”

Jack cocks his head to one side and grins. “Of course not. This little beauty has a state-of-the-art collision avoidance system. It practically flies itself.” 

“Then why didn’t you tell me that all of this—this 
terror
—was the game plan?” I ask as Jack jerks Teddy up by his collar and goosesteps him over to one of the chairs facing the dinette table.

Jack looks up, confused. “I did, when you walked to the galley, to get Teddy water to take his anxiety pill. You mean, you didn’t hear me?”

 “No...Oh my God, I guess my earbud cut out, right as you were relaying the message.” 

Jack laughs. “And all this time I thought you were just acting as if you were scared—which is exactly what I wanted. Doll, I’m not teasing you—it was truly an Academy-Award worthy performance.” 

It’s too much to hope for, but I have to ask. “In other words, all that stuff you said about Penelope and Babette wasn’t true?” 

“Oh, it was true, Babe.” He winks at me. “But I’m sure you’ll agree I responded like the loyal and loving boyfriend I am.”

A grudging nod is all he gets. Okay, now the moment of truth. “What was that you were going to say again—I mean, about Valentina?”

“Huh?” Jack frowns. “Oh…Just that she asked me to run away with her—” 

“She…what?” My heart drops into my stomach. “Why didn’t you tell me this, before now?”

He takes my face in his hands. “
Because it never happened.
 The only reason I’d say so was to get Big Sack of Shit here”—he elbows Teddy in the gut “—to think that he had every reason to piss his pants.” He looks at Teddy’s crotch. “Yep. It worked.”

I look away so that he can’t see my tears. “You went too far, Jack.”

He runs his hands through his hair. “Jeez, Donna, cut me some slack! Our relationship is built on our mutual trust, remember? It’s you, always and forever.”

To prove his point he pulls me close, so that I’m breast to chest with him.

So that, when I look into the depth of his eyes, the reflection I see is one of—

Me.

Yes, this is how it should be, always and forever.

Well that, and his lips on mine.

Like….now…

Joy.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Teddy inching his way toward the galley. My sidekick puts him in his proper place.

On the ground, face down. 

Jack laughs and shakes his head as he yanks Teddy back on his feet and tosses him onto one of the cabin’s couches. Then he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a taser gun. 

“For the next ten minutes or so, we’ll still be far enough away from US airspace. If old Teddy here tries anything funny, zap him with this. We can’t have bullets flying all over the place. The last thing we need is an air pressure breach. I’ll be watching on the monitor.” He walks to the cockpit door and unlocks it, closing it behind him.

I perch on the chair opposite our captive, and point to the television screen on an opposite wall. “Wave at the camera, Teddy. It caught your confession on video. We’ll be sharing it with the CIA and the Department of Justice, to help them in their case against you.”

“What you heard was given under duress! It won’t stand up in a court of law.”

“We’re not officers of the court, so yes, we can certainly be called as witnesses regarding any statements you made to us—which include your comments to me prior to our near-fatal fall.”

Teddy is paler now than he was during our nose dive over the Pacific. “But—but the Ecuadorians have promised me a secured mountaintop to live on!”