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Authors: Lily Paradis

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BOOK: Volition
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* * * *



a novel

Copyright © 2015 by Lily Paradis

In Association with Empire Books

Published by Lily Paradis and Elia Sayre

[email protected]


Cover Design by Sarah Hansen of
Okay Creations

Editing by Katie Molloy of Indra Editing

Proofreading by Jovana Shirley of
Unforeseen Editing

Print and eBook Design by
JT Formatting


All rights reserved.

Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of both the copyright owner and the above publisher of this book.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media, and incidents are either the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products, bands, and/or restaurants referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.


License Notes

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to your favorite ebook retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.


Title Page




Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty-One

Chapter Twenty-Two

Chapter Twenty-Three

Chapter Twenty-Four

Chapter Twenty-Five

Chapter Twenty-Six

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Chapter Thirty

Chapter Thirty-One

Chapter Thirty-Two

Chapter Thirty-Three

Chapter Thirty-Four

Chapter Thirty-Five

Chapter Thirty-Six

Chapter Thirty-Seven

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Chapter Thirty-Nine

Chapter Forty

Chapter Forty-One

Chapter Forty-Two

Chapter Forty-Three

Chapter Forty-Four

Chapter Forty-Five

Chapter Forty-Six

Chapter Forty-Seven

Chapter Forty-Eight

Chapter Forty-Nine

Chapter Fifty

Chapter Fifty-One

Chapter Fifty-Two

Chapter Fifty-Three

Chapter Fifty-Four

Chapter Fifty-Five

Chapter Fifty-Six

Chapter Fifty-Seven

Chapter Fifty-Eight

Chapter Fifty-Nine

Chapter Sixty

Chapter Sixty-One

Chapter Sixty-Two

Chapter Sixty-Three

Chapter Sixty-Four

Chapter Sixty-Five

Chapter Sixty-Six

Chapter Sixty-Seven

Chapter Sixty-Eight

Chapter Sixty-Nine

Chapter Seventy

Chapter Seventy-One


Volition Playlist

Other books by Lily Paradis


About the Author





For anyone who can’t let go of their Jesse.




“My will is mine... I shall not make it soft for you.”





I hate love triangles. I swore I would never write one. You might hate them too. But I wrote this book for myself. It was far more cathartic for me to write than it’ll ever be for you to read. That's why I'm not changing anything to make it more appealing, or understandable to the masses, because that wouldn't do justice to Tate or myself. If you want to understand this book, you’ll have to work for it. You’ll have to think. You’ll have to let go of what you want. I'm not going to trim it up neatly and put it into a genre box so it can be ripped apart when it doesn't exactly fit.

I’m not going to give you a bubbly, insanely likeable main character. Traditionally, when male narrators are unlikeable, they’re considered edgy, romantic, and endlessly alluring. When a female narrator is the same way, she’s just deemed a bitch. We all have our quirks, and it just so happens that Tate McKenna is stranger than most. It was difficult to make her relatable even through her actions, and I hope I succeeded even in a small way. If you don’t like her at all, I don’t blame you.

I thought long and hard about not publishing this book at all, because this book is my horcrux. It is a piece of my soul in ink and paper.

What happens in this book isn’t exactly a “love triangle” to me, but it may seem that way to you. That’s the funny thing about perception. I will never be able to experience the words the way you will, and you’ll never see them the way I do.

Regardless, I hope you see something of yourself in them. It’s not meant to be just a story. It’s meant to make you reflect. I wish I could write something universal, but that’s just not possible. I hope that even if you don’t like it, you still feel it. Even a tiny, shred of a feeling would do.

I like to do everything deliberately. If you’re asking a question, that’s valid. I want you to ask it. If there’s a reason it’s not answered, it’s meant to make you think. Everything in this book is done intentionally so that the events unfold in the right way. If anything feels wrong to you, it means it is so right for this book, and that's how I want it to feel.

If you’ve never heard of the iceberg theory, I encourage you to look it up. Essentially, there’s always more below the surface than what you see. I love finding meaning in the smallest things. I wrote
this way.

There will be people who get it and what that means in
. They’re going to get it, and it’s going to be like a hammer to the chest. If you’re one of those, I want you to email me, and I want to hear about your self-reflection. I want to hear about your Jesse.

If just one person this and feels the catharsis I felt while writing about anything in their life, maybe not even a Jesse or a Hayden, then that’s why this book exists, and that’s why I chose to share it with you.

BOOK: Volition
2.44Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub

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