Wait (The Fast Series) (22 page)

“My girlfriend is in the bathroom,” I say politely, hoping to brush her off gently.

“Maybe you should go check on her. I’ve seen you sitting here for the last hour all by your lonesome,” she challenges.

What’s the matter with this girl? Can’t she take a hint? Does she want her feelings hurt? “Listen, I’m not interested. But I’m sure if you keep searching there are plenty of guys here that are.”

“What’s the matter? My hair isn’t curly enough for you?” She cocks her head to the side and waits for my answer.

My head whips around to look at this girl more closely. Tanned, blonde, with a strong air of confidence. Oh hell, I should’ve known. “What are you doing here?”

“I was here visiting my friend. I think maybe you should too.”

“I think she made herself clear. That’s not what she wants.”

“I don’t think she made herself clear at all. I think you need to go over there and make sure this time she tells you what you want to hear.”

“What do you think I want to hear? Those feelings I had changed.” I take a swig of beer and try to remain collected.

She narrows her eyes and doesn’t do well hiding her smirk. I don’t know who I’m trying to kid. This girl isn’t fooled for a second. She knows too damn much.

“Tucker, please. If your feelings had changed, you would have been all over me.” She smacks my arm playfully, tosses a paper down on the bar and struts away.

So, that’s the infamous Ashley Simons. Pretty much what I pictured, she’s as cool as Tessa always made her out to be. Not sure how she found me but something tells me the girl is resourceful. I open the paper and see Ashley has written down Tessa’s dorm information.

Ashley must know something if she made it a point to see me.

On my way over to Tessa’s dorm I pass by the convenience store on campus. In a bucket next to the register they have individual roses wrapped in cellophane for three bucks. I run in, picking out the pinkest rose they have and pay for it. Outside the store I slip the pink rose out and toss it into the garbage, one sprig of baby’s breath remaining in the cellophane. I’m keeping it romantic.

I’m buzzed into the building and hurry down the hall to find Tessa’s room.

She opens the door and the sight of her standing there in my worn out t-shirt knocks the breath right out of me. In true Tessa style she takes a few seconds to look me up and down. Taking the cheap bouquet from my hand she jumps up and throws her arms around me. “Tucker!” she cries, before desperately pressing her lips to mine.

The overeager kisser I’ve missed so much is wrapped in my arms. I’m too lost in her to think straight. To get the words I want to say out. There is so much want in these kisses, but not the kind of want I’m used to. It’s more of a need. I need this girl. The way she’s kissing me, I know she needs me too.

“Tessa,” I say my mouth still up against hers. “What went wrong? Why didn’t you want to be with me?”

“I do want to be with you, Tucker. Please, don’t stop kissing me.”

We move into her dorm room and close the door behind us. We’re together again. I spend the rest of the night making up for all the kisses we’ve missed.

CHAPTER EIGHT

Mark

I place an expensive detailed order over the phone, paying in full with my credit card. A pricey pink treat it would take all day to make. Fortunately my request happens to be the specialty of one of the people who works there. I arranged for it to be ready for pickup by six p.m., but walk into the bakery at six a.m.

“Hey Mark, what are you doing here? You home already? I thought you wouldn’t be home until next week for Thanksgiving.” Mr. DeMarco greets me from behind the counter.

“I’m just home for a little bit, was hoping I could talk to Cassie if she’s got a minute.”

“Yeah, sure thing.” Mr. DeMarco swings open the door to the kitchen. “Cass,” he yells, “Come in the front. You got a visitor.”

She comes walking through the door wiping her hands on the front of her apron, startled when she sees me standing there. “Mark, hey, why are you here at,” she looks over at the clock, “six o’clock in the morning?”

“I wanted to see if you were able to hang out today.”

“Today? I can’t. I’m working.”

“You can’t even get away for a little while?”

“No, I have a big order for a cake. It’s going to take me all day.”

“Or you would hang out with me? You know if you didn’t have to make that cake? The only reason I ask is because every time I’ve called you or stop by you’re too busy to talk or see me. I’m starting to wonder if you’re avoiding me.”

Cassie glances over at her father who’s leaning on the counter watching us. “No, I’m not avoiding you. Really, you can ask my dad, I have a special order today or I would definitely hang out.”

“I hoped you’d say that, because the cake, it’s for me, I ordered it. Now that I think about it, I think I’d rather have that one.” I point to a chocolate frosted cake on the top shelf behind the glass.

“The cake you ordered and paid for was much more expensive than that one. I’m afraid we don’t give refunds,” she huffs, annoyed by my scheme.

“We’ll call it even.” I shrug. “Looks like you’re not that busy now. We can hang out.”

“I can’t, my dad still needs me here to work.”

“No, you can go.” Her father’s still leaning on the counter, taking us in, a bit amused. “Besides I’ve been begging you take some time off to go out and have some fun.”

“Great,” I grin at Cassie. “Let’s go have some fun.”

She has no choice. Reluctantly, she unties the back of her apron and tosses it angrily on the countertop. “Yup, fun, let’s go.”

“Why are you so mad?” I ask her once we’re in my car. “Is it that bad I want to see you and hang out and talk?”

“We talk all the time.”

“No, I call you all the time, but we never talk. On the rare occasion you answer your phone or bother to return a text message it’s usually just to tell me how busy you are. I haven’t really seen or talked to you since the last day at camp. We need to talk.”

No reply. She pulls the clip from her hair still lightened with streaks of blonde. The sweet-smelling scent from the damp hair fills the car.

“So where are we going?” she finally says.

“Nowhere that great I just spent four hundred dollars on a cake.” I grin at her and she actually smiles and lets out a little laugh, lifting some of the tension.

“So tell me all about school. Are you having fun?” she asks.

“School is good. Not that much fun.”

“Why not? I thought you’d be having so much fun.”

“All that fun you wanted me to have, that you thought you’d be blocking. I’m not having it. Because the fun I want to be having at school, I want you to be a part of it. Without you in my life there’s no way I’m able to have fun. Fun is when I’m with you.”

“Mark.” She starts with the squirming and ringing her hands. “How could it work? We’re both busy, and you’re so far away. I’ll probably never be able to visit you at school. I mean, really, how would I even get there?”

“Where do you think we’re going right now? I imagined when I merged on the turnpike that would have tipped you off.”

“We’re going to your school?” Her back goes straight and she looks out the car window as if she’s just noticing where we are. “That’s so far away, how long will we be gone?”

“Cassie, it’s an hour and ten minutes away. I came home two weeks ago so my mom could do my laundry. Why do you have this big need for drama about me being away at school? Is it really about school or is it something else?”

“I don’t know.” She collapses, crumpling back down in her seat. “Since our first date, being with you was what I wanted. Then you started talking about school and the idea of losing you was so painful. I tried to keep us at a safe place where that would never happen. I wanted it so we could be friends and you would go away and I wouldn’t feel so hurt when you started going out and meeting new girls. It would be okay, because we were just friends. I wouldn’t actually lose you.” Her head bangs back against the seat. “And then we got to camp. Seeing you with someone else, being with someone that wasn’t you, it was awful. Even though we weren’t together, we were losing each other anyway. So I figured if I was losing you then at least I wanted to be with you… even if it was only for a short time.”

“You’re not losing me. I know us being with other people this summer was tough for both us. But I also think we kind of needed those other people to get a clear picture of what we had. It kind of put in perspective what was real and what wasn’t. In a strange way it helped us.”

“I know you’re right. But it did happen. We both were with other people. I don’t want to sit at home wondering if you’re with someone at school, if some new slutty redhead is leaving your room in the mornings.”

“If we’re together would I have to worry that you we’re cheating on me with someone else?”

“No you wouldn’t,” she says firmly.

“I know I wouldn’t, because once we’re together that’s it. This summer we worked out the kinks. We put our relationship to the test and realized that we’re meant to be more than friends. Cass, you’re all I think about. I liked you so much right from the start, from the very first date when I should have kissed you. This summer the feelings I already felt for you turned into so much more. I need you in my life. You’re the coolest, most fun, amazing girl I’ve ever known and now, the way I feel about you… I’m in deep girl.” I say the last part in a deep sexy voice and send her an air kiss.

Cassie covers her face. “Mark,” she laughs.

“Did I ruin the moment?” I laugh with her.

She opens her mouth and shakes her head. She’s still trying to fight it, but realizes she can’t. “No, it was exactly the type of moment we needed and those things you do are why, ahh!” she screams and tugs on the end of her hair, “those things you do are why I love you so much. Why I miss you and why I’m miserable without you.”

“Cassie, it’s time to face it. This is happening.”

A big smile takes over her face. She shakes her head and looks up. “So this is it. We’re together now and in love?”

“We are officially together and we are
sooo
in love.” I say with more sexy-voiced conviction. I take my eyes off the road to give her a grin and quick wink.

“Is it really this easy?” she sighs. “Are we missing something?”

“Not anymore.” I reach over for her hand and she laces her fingers through mine.

“I get to see your school and meet all your new friends?”

“Yup, I want to introduce them to my girlfriend, being she’s gonna be coming down to visit every chance she gets.”

“What about your roommate? Does he know I’m coming?”

“He went home for the weekend. But don’t worry you can meet him next time.”

“What are we gonna do first when we get there?” She lets go of my hand and it travels over to my leg and squeezes.

The hand is back on my leg, I need to ease my foot up on the gas pedal. “Well, for starters I’m gonna pull down the shades…”

Tucker

I point to the gift bag on my desk. “I got you something.”

“You did? What for?” Tessa runs over to the bag peering inside. She’s wearing tight fitting jeans and a bulky sweatshirt with our school’s name across it.
Smoking hot
. It’s been almost a month since we’ve been back together and there isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t see her. “Passion fruit, perfect,” she giggles, pulling a bottle from the bag, lifting the cap and sniffing.

“Separate shampoo and conditioner, of course. Don’t forget the card.” Knowing what I spent on these bottles of shampoo and conditioner versus what I spent on the first bottles I got her is an embarrassment. My girlfriend has exquisite taste and I was a fool to think anything less.

Tessa grabs the little card she missed, opening it with a huge smile. The card has three words. Words we’ve been avoiding for some time now. I’m still not sure why. The smile disappears, and panic peeks out.

“What’s the matter?”

“You never said this before.”

“I guess not exactly, but back at camp when we discussed the rules, I kinda said it. I felt it then. I feel it even more now. Give me the card, I’ll read it out loud to you.” I reach my hand out to her.

“No.” She snaps the card away, shoving it back in the bag. “I don’t want you to say it.”

“You still don’t feel the same way?” My chest tightens. The air in my room grows thick.

“I don’t want you to say it. I don’t want me to say it. I don’t want us to say it.” Her voice cracks, eyes filling with tears. “Tucker, those words are going to ruin this. We can’t say it. Not yet.”

“Stop, no crying, it’s okay. If you don’t love me, you can tell me.” The tightening in my chest turns into painful aching. “Is it something I did? Is it something I’m doing?”

Tessa looks at me through her tears, shaking her head no, too choked up to speak. She’s only able to get out loud sniffs and sobs while her chest heaves.

“Talk to me,” I speak softly. “Whatever it is you can tell me.”

Taking a seat at my desk, she opens up one of my notebooks and begins writing. Giant tears go crashing down onto the paper in front of her.

I pace the length of the room. A break up letter? What is it about the word love that makes her upset? The kisses, the touches, it’s all been perfect. My life since I’ve met her has only kept getting better. What am I missing? The sound of paper ripping against the metal spiral makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up straight. This is it. She walks over and hands me the paper she’s folded in half. I look down and read.

I told you I was waiting for love. I thought as soon as I fell in love I would be ready to have sex. But then I fell in love and I realized I’m still not ready. So if you say I love you and then I say I love you, but we don’t have sex, what happens?

I know I’ll be ready one day. I just don’t know when that will be. I’m sorry
.

I look up at my silly weeping girlfriend. “You love me?”

She nods.

“But you’re not ready to have sex?”

She shakes her head.