Where the Lotus Flowers Grow (16 page)

“Bombs.”

This was the real change, wasn’t it? When had differences, once respected, turned into obstacles to be conquered?

He rubbed my shoulder. “The terrorist attacks have made this necessary. Don’t worry. It’s just a precaution.”

The extravagant suite he’d booked had a lovely view of the city. We were on the top floor, and I could see the terraces and roofs of all the tall buildings. Hear the noise of a million people and smell the chaos of it all. A warm breeze came through the open veranda. Most of the time the city didn’t smell very good. But there were other times when it was scented with the aroma of spices and flowers and sea. We had arrived at such a time. I took it as an auspicious sign. Liam’s arms wrapped around me as we stared at the Bombay skyline.

“It’s a beautiful room.”

“I always opt for a regular room and reserve the nicer ones for guests, but I made an exception.”

I held in a laugh since we
were
an exception, a complete contradiction to normal.

“I have to tour the facilities and meet with the management here. I’ll be a few hours. Will you be alright, love?”

“Yes. I think I’ll go out for a while.”

“Why don’t you wait for me?” There was a worry in his voice. When I tilted my head back, he was staring at the traffic, his brows drawn. “We can go sightseeing together.”

I was in Bombay, and there was only one sight I had to see. I had to do it alone. “Liam, this is where I was born. It’s my home. I’ll be fine.”

“Have the driver take you. If you need anything, charge it to the room.” He put a key card in my hand.

“May I borrow your book?
Nicholas Nickelby
? I’ll be very careful with it. I know what it means to you.”

A flicker of surprise crossed the chiseled planes of his face. “Of course, Mary. If you want something different, though, there is a bookstore downstairs. I’m sure they have some Highlander novels.” He arched a brow, his smile turning wicked. “It might serve as fodder for other activities.”

My face flushed. “I’m really in the mood for Dickens. Thank you.”

The valet cleared his throat. We both startled, unaware he was still in the room. “Sir, the front desk wanted me to give you this message from Mr. Stephen Wilshire. He asks you call him immediately.”

Liam’s smiled tightened into a thin line. “Thank you,” he said, tipping the man and closing the door behind him.

I realized that he’d been worried about my job, but I’d never given a single thought to his.

“Liam, will you…will you get in trouble because of us?”

“No worries on that account.”

“Why is Stephen Wilshire calling you then?” I chided myself for the question. Liam was in upper management. It would make sense he would talk to the owner of Wilshire Corporation once in a while.

“Probably to annoy me.”

I gestured to the spacious room. We were in a country where you paid steep premiums for space. “This room? My airline ticket?”

“What about it?”

“I know you’re in a high position, but can you afford all this?”

He chuckled as if I’d made a joke.

“Something funny?”

He adjusted his tie in the mirror. “I forgot you don’t know.”

“Know what?”

“I own the Wilshire group…or at least half of it. Stephen owns the other half.”

His statement echoed in my head. Surely, he was joking. It made no sense. I turned the bracelet on my wrist. “You’re teasing me.”

“I’m not.”

“It’s a family-owned hotel.”

“Right, Stephen and I are half brothers. Although I wouldn’t call him family.”

I recalled the phone conversation from his brother. Why hadn’t I made the connection? But I realized now the man never told me his name. Stupid, stupid girl.

“But it’s an American company. You’re British. You have a different surname.” I blurted out, as if he didn’t know all those things.

“You’re correct on all counts. I told you I come from a long line of surly bastards. I’m no different. I didn’t find out who my father was until my mum passed away. Despite all his pressure, I insisted on keeping the name I was born with.”

Liam took a step toward. I took a step back. My knees hit the back of a chair. I collapsed onto it, feeling a crushing weight on top of me.

He knelt beside me. His hand stilled my shaking knee. “Hey, you okay, Mary?”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

I felt betrayed. I thought we weren’t on the same plane before, but now I questioned if we even existed in the same universe. What was I even doing here with him?

“The upper management all know who I am, but I find it works in my favor to keep a low profile and not flaunt it.”

“You deceived me. I knew you had wealth…but you’re a billionaire.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing. I’ve never had that reaction before. You’re a very peculiar girl.”

A very stupid, stupid girl.

I remained silent, trying to control the million different threads pulling all at once, ready to rip me apart. There was a dark sorrow in his eyes.

“I have no idea who you are, and here I am running off with you.”

“You know me better than most…maybe all. If you want all the sordid details, I can give them to you. The car accident with my mother? I was driving. The roads were slick, and I was going too fast. I ran a light. A truck slammed into her side. I woke up in the hospital with a broken leg and no mother.”

I wasn’t sure if he was speaking to fill up the empty air between us. When the emotion cracked his voice, it split something inside of me, too. “You blame yourself.” It wasn’t a question. I could see years of guilt and anguish reflecting in his eyes. The same emotions I saw whenever I looked in the mirror.

“Of course I do. It was my fault. The rain made her arthritis worse. She had a hard time driving. There were other options, though. We could have called a cab, but then we would have had to dip into the money for my rugby cleats. I couldn’t have that now, could I? We could have taken the bloody bus, but I didn’t want to stand outside in the rain. She argued with me, especially since I didn’t have a license. But I insisted on driving. I was late to school, and she had to go to work. I thought I was helping us…helping her. Instead, I killed her.”

“It was an accident. She wouldn’t blame you.”

I’m not sure if I said it aloud, because he ignored the statement. “I had no other family, or so I thought. Mum told me my dad passed away right after I was born. Then a man turned up at her funeral, claiming to be my biological father. He’d read the obituary. Naturally, I didn’t believe him, but the blood test was pretty damn conclusive. Everything changed for me. I moved to New York and became heir to a hotel empire. It fucking sounds like a Dickens novel, doesn’t it? I can’t even comprehend it myself. I didn’t ask for any of it. I’d give it all back, every fucking nickel, if I could relive that day and call a fucking cab.”

“I’m so sorry, Liam.”

A warm fat tear rolled down my face. He wiped it away.

“What are you sorry for, love?” His voice inched up a level. “What happened to me or because you’re leaving me?”

How did he have the ability to see through my façade?

“I can’t do this.”

“It’s not as if you’ve been forthright with me.”

“You lied to me, Liam. You weren’t in senior management.” I looked around the opulent room. “You own all this.”

“Do you have an aversion to wealth? Does it somehow taint me in your eyes?”

“No.”

“Then what the bloody hell is your problem?”

“Nothing.”

“You’re acting ridiculous.”

“I’m a ridiculous girl, Liam.”

I refused to look at him. Liam had become my weakness. I stared straight ahead. He grabbed my trembling hand.

“Look at me, please, because I really need you to hear what I am saying.”

My head warned me not to, but my traitorous body could not resist his command.

“It may not seem like it, but I fought my feelings for you.” He let out a cynical laugh. “I don’t want to want you. We’re complicated, aren’t we? We have very different pasts and no future. But none of that matters to me. And you want me, too. We have an opportunity to spend some time together and enjoy each other. Whatever promises I can make to keep you here, I will. If you want no sex and a separate room, that’s fine by me.” He swallowed. “That’s a bloody bald-faced lie. It’s not fine by me, but I’ll do it. Because as much as I crave all of you, I’ll take whatever you’ll give me. I told you once there is a power between us, but it is you who controls it.”

I should have grabbed my bag and ran. “Liam…”

“Shhh. I’m not done. Despite all my good intentions, I want you so much it frightens me. But if you feel you cannot be with me, then I’ll wish you well and let you go. I won’t chase after you. That’s not who I am. I have no idea who hurt you so badly you won’t give anyone a chance to be in your life. I want to tear him apart for harming you. But what you’re doing? This impenetrable shield you’ve created around yourself? You’re still letting him hurt you, baby. That’s killing me.” He took a deep breath and stood. He put on his suit jacket and headed for the door. “I hope you’ll be here when I get back.”

I stood, my knees shaky. “Like I said, I’m going out, but I’ll be back in a few hours. No need for separate rooms.”

The muscles of his back relaxed. “See you soon, love.”

Mary

I shivered in the dark, cold room. My head spun from whatever drugs they had given me. They forced me onto my knees. A huge hand, stinking of tobacco, gripped my shoulder. A switch flipped. Harsh yellow lights burned onto me.

“What’s happening?” I asked, or maybe I didn’t, because no one responded.

I stared straight ahead at the monitor. On the screen, I saw a man, a huge looming shape whose face was in shadow. Behind him was what looked to be a statue of a gold tower and a painting that depicted a grove of tall, spindly trees, their white branches twisting into each other as if they were embracing.

“Hello, Mary. You may call me Sahib.” His deep, Western voice resonated from the computer. I strained to hear. I squinted my eyes, trying to focus on him, but all I could make out was the picture behind him.

“Does she not speak English?”

“She does, Sahib,” the guard said. I heard fear in his own voice when he replied. This man on a monitor far from here frightened them, too.

“Address me, girl!”

“No,” I said, sure I’d formed the word this time.

“Ah, you have some fight in you. I like that. But understand this, girl. I paid for you. I own you. That means you do as I say.”

“No one can own anyone. My papa will find me. You will pay.”

He laughed mercilessly. “Explain it to her.”

The hand on my shoulder gripped harder as another slapped me across the face. Blood gushed down my nose. Then he kicked my side.

“That’s enough!” the man said.

I lay on my side, hugging my knees.

“I am a rich man. Rich enough to buy and sell you. Rich enough to own you. Out of all the girls in the world, I chose you. I will break you like I break a wild mare. You will call me Sahib. Now get up.”

I didn’t. My body refused. Air wafted over me before a fist connected to my rib.

“Don’t hit her. She has to do it on her own.”

“She won’t, Sahib,” the guard said. “She is insolent. We have other ways to make her do things.”

“I don’t want her drugged.”

The world was quiet for a moment. The floor was cool. I focused on the pattern of the tiles, trying to steady my breaths.

“You have her sister, correct?” the monster asked.

“Yes, sir. She was a witness. Shall we dispose of her?”

“No!” I cried.

“That got your attention. Refer to me by name, slave. Sit up and say my name.”

I winced with pain. My hands pressed into the ground. After a few tries, I managed to get on my knees. I bowed my head. “Sahib. Master. Owner.”

“Good girl. I’m coming to visit you myself. It won’t be long till we meet face to face. In the meantime, we’re going to play a few games, you and I. You enjoy games, don’t you?”

“Yes.”

I tried to swallow, but it was painful. I kept Hannah in the back of my mind. By doing that, I could be what he wanted. I could play the games he set out. I could even go somewhere else in my mind
.

I woke up in the back seat of the car, stuck in a midday Bombay traffic jam. The driver looked at me in the rearview mirror. “Are you alright, madam?”

“Fine, thank you.”

I rubbed my face, wondering why the hell my nightmares were resurfacing.
Liam was rich, but nothing like the man who tortured me. Part of me feared his wealth because money, especially his kind of money, had power to destroy.
Liam was right about how I let my past hurt me. Just because I escaped, didn’t mean I survived. Survival was not about existing. It was about living. For the first time in my life, I felt alive. I refused to allow the darkness of the past to infiltrate my time with him.

“How much longer?”

“Not long, madam.”

It took an hour to make the ten-kilometer journey to the cemetery. Someone had tended Papa and Hannah’s plots. Fresh orange marigolds covered the ground in front of their stones. I fell to my knees before them.

Bowing my head, I took out the cloth beads. I ran my fingers over them, repeating the rosary.

“Hi Papaji. It’s been a long time, but I think of you and Hannah every single day. I never appreciated your lessons when you gave them, but I understand them now. I’m grateful for everything you taught me. I miss you. I love you.”

I turned to Hannah’s grave. I traced the two dates etched onto her gravestone. The span separating the years was much too small for the huge impression she left.

“Hi, Hannah. I’m sorry I’ve been away so long. I ran away from everything after you died. You see, I thought I died, too. It took me a long time to realize I hadn’t.” I patted my heart. “I’m so sorry, sister.”

I took Liam’s book from my satchel. “Remember how you wanted me to read this to you? I hope you still want to hear it, because it’s long overdue.”