Where the Memories Lie (18 page)

and settle down?’

‘Exactly. So she wouldn’t get involved with Dad, would she?’

‘But when Chris finished with her I think she got more

desperate. She couldn’t afford to get her own place with the wages

she earned in the shop so she was probably trying it on with Tom

because he would be able to support her. Give her the family security she must’ve longed for. She just wanted to get away from Rose and

Jack but couldn’t afford to do it on her own. And when it looked

like she couldn’t get Chris to help her, maybe she turned to Tom.

And maybe she was threatening to expose their affair and Tom got

angry with her.’

‘Oh, God.’ The colour suddenly drained from his face.

‘What?’

He scrubbed a hand over his smooth cheeks. ‘She tried it on

with me once.’

‘What? When? Why didn’t you say anything?’ My eyes widened.

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‘Because I wasn’t interested and it didn’t seem important at

the time. Chris had finished with her but he was obviously still

in love with her, and I wasn’t about to upset him or you over it by mentioning what had happened. It was best left untold. Like I said, she was a troublemaker. She probably did it to try and split us up

because she was jealous.’

‘My best friend trying it on with my boyfriend’s not important?

Of course it is.’ I slammed my glass down on the island. ‘What

happened?’

‘It was nothing. I was at the Kings’ Arms one night with

Lucas and Chris. We were having a game of darts or snooker, or

something. An old school mate came in just before last orders. Do

you remember Colin Montgomery?’

I thought back. Colin always used to smell of lemons for

some reason.

I nodded.

‘Anyway, I got chatting to him, and Lucas and Chris left

before me. At chucking out time, I said goodbye to Colin, who

was heading in the other direction, and walked home. As I was

going past the bus stop, I saw Katie there, sitting down. The last

thing I wanted was to get into a conversation with her, but I knew

the last bus had already gone at that time, and I didn’t want to see her waiting there on her own. Didn’t even really understand why

she was waiting there, anyway. I mean, where was she going at just

after 11 p.m.?

‘Anyway, I stopped and we had a bit of small talk, then before

I knew it she stood up and made a play for me.’

I tilted my head. ‘What do you mean, “a play”?’

‘She actually walked up to me and put her arms round my neck

and tried to kiss me. I took a step back and unwound them, holding

her at arm’s length. I just laughed and made a joke of it at first. She stunk of alcohol, too. But she tried again. Tried to pull me towards 131

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her, and she said something about us going in the woods for a fuck, and that you’d never find out.’

A stabbing pain squeezed at my throat like something sharp

stuck inside. ‘Go on.’

‘Well.’ He shrugged casually. ‘I just laughed. I told her she

was pissed and she should go home. Then she got angry, called me

fucking queer or something, and I just walked off and left her there.’

He drained the dregs of beer. ‘And that was that. I turned her down and forgot about it.’ He threw his bottle in the bin underneath the sink with a loud crash and opened another. ‘Do you want a top-up?’

He glanced at my now-empty glass.

‘Yes. I think I need it.’ I forced the igniting anger back down.

He sloshed more pale golden liquid into my glass and put the

bottle back in the fridge before sitting down next to me.

‘When was that?’

He shrugged. ‘I can’t remember exactly. I don’t know how

long it was after Chris had dumped her.’ Before I could think

any more about what a betrayal Katie’s actions were, he said, ‘Do

you seriously think she then tried it on with Dad and they had

an affair?’

‘It seems the most likely thing.’

‘That bitch.’

‘She wasn’t a bitch,’ I said automatically, used to defending her

like I always had. But now I didn’t know what she was. In return for my loyalty and friendship she’d tried to sleep with my boyfriend.

A boyfriend she knew I was in love with. Still, it was years ago. Too late to worry about it now. We had more important things to worry

about. ‘She was . . . she was living a shitty life with no one to love her. That’s what she was after. All the sleeping around was about

searching for someone to love and take care of her. I just didn’t get it at the time. She kept everything locked deep inside. I never saw her cry, you know. Never once in all the years I’d known her. And

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now I think about what it must’ve been like in that house with Rose and Jack pissed out of their heads, having to look after herself and grow up before her time.’

The words in her letter swam into my head again.

I’m leaving this place and you can’t stop me. You know what you
both did. I hope you rot in hell!

Good riddance!

‘And if Jack abused her, then . . .’ I trailed off. ‘Well, wouldn’t you want to get away?’

‘Abused her?’

I told him about my suspicions.

He slumped further down on the stool. ‘I can’t bloody take

this in. Wouldn’t she have said something if Jack had been . . . well, I can’t even say it. I mean, Katie wasn’t some quiet wallflower. She had a mouth on her. Why wouldn’t she tell anyone?’

‘A lot of child abuse victims blame themselves. Maybe she was

scared to tell the truth in case no one believed her. Maybe Katie did tell Rose but Rose ignored it and let it carry on. Maybe Katie didn’t want to admit it was even going on.’

‘Then isn’t it more likely that if something happened to her, it

was Jack?’

I shook my head. ‘I don’t know. If Jack was involved in her

disappearance, why did Tom say he’d buried her?’

‘It doesn’t make sense. None of this does. He’s just confused.’

But his voice sounded doubtful now.

‘I don’t want to believe it, either, but too many things aren’t

adding up.’ I reached out and threaded my fingers through his. ‘But we have to see if she’s under there, Ethan. You know that, don’t you?’

133

Chapter Fifteen

They came with their vehicles and white suits and equip-

ment. From the kitchen window I could see the double

garage at a diagonal angle. The wooden doors were open,

but I couldn’t see what they were doing inside. Didn’t want to

see that.

I stood, cradling a cup of cold coffee, wondering if I should go

out there and offer them all one. What was the proper hospitality

etiquette when police were looking for a dead body on your property?

There was only room for one van on the drive with both

Ethan’s and my car already there, and it belonged to the scene of

crime officers. The plainclothes police officers who’d introduced

themselves as Detective Inspector Spencer and Detective Sergeant

Khan parked their black Ford Mondeo on the road outside, along

with another woman’s BMW. The gates to the drive were open and

anyone walking past could see the van emblazoned with ‘Crime

Scene Investigation Unit’ in plain view. That would get the gossip-

mongers’ tongues firing on all cylinders.

‘What are we going to say when people notice that van on the

drive?’ Ethan sat at the island, laptop open in front of him on

the counter, eyes bloodshot and hair spiked up where he’d been

Where the Memories Lie

running his hands through it. He was supposed to be sending some

work emails that couldn’t wait, but really he’d been staring out of the window since they arrived with some kind of imaging equipment,

like I had. ‘Maybe we should just say the garage was broken into.’

I glanced at him with exasperation. ‘And say what, that some-

one broke into the garage and deposited a body under the concrete

floor, then left? Oh, wow, how did that happen?’

‘Well, they’re not going to find anything. This is all a ridiculous waste of everyone’s time. Just like it was with Georgia. Not to

mention the expense of digging up the bloody floor and relaying it.

And, more importantly, what are we going to tell Anna when she

sees a hole in the floor?’ He shot me a filthy look.

I chewed on my lip. I’d dropped off her school uniform over

to Nadia’s late last night and asked if she could stay there. Anna

was pretty chuffed about it in the end since she got to spend a

school night having a sleepover with her cousin. We hadn’t told

Nadia what it was all about yet. Ethan insisted there was no point.

He thought the police would discover that Katie really wasn’t down

there and we could all forget about it. No point upsetting everyone for absolutely no reason, he’d said. He thought it was all some kind of macabre mistake. I thought he was in denial.

A loud noise from what sounded like a hammer drill reverberated

through the windows.

Poppy shot out of the kitchen and ran up the stairs to get away

from it. She probably thought it was thunder, which she hated.

I could picture her now, cowering in the shower cubicle, shaking.

Usually, I’d sit with her, stroking and reassuring her, but I couldn’t then. I had to see what was going on. Like a rubbernecker at an

accident scene, I was glued in place by an invisible tape.

My stomach cramped and the orange juice I’d drunk for break-

fast burned inside. I hadn’t been able to eat any real food for fear of bringing it back up again.

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‘Oh, my God.’ I dropped my head into my hand, tugging at my

roots. ‘If they’re digging, they must’ve found something with that

imaging stuff.’

‘I can’t concentrate with all that racket going on. I’m going

to take the dog out. I need some air.’ Ethan slammed the laptop

shut so hard I’m surprised he didn’t crack it. He managed to coax

a shaking Poppy out the door and when he left, I suddenly felt

calmer, as if his anger had been permeating into me by osmosis. He

was like that, you see. If things went wrong and he felt powerless or unable to protect his family in some way, he let it out by shouting or being defensive. Maybe he felt like I was criticising him, or that I thought he was a failure or something. I don’t know. Men really are from Mars sometimes.

I’m not sure how long I stood in that position while the drilling

pounded inside my head and out. When it stopped some time later,

my ears were hypersensitive and I could still hear ringing, like a bad case of tinnitus you get after going to a nightclub. I took the ironing board out of the utility room, plugged in the iron and got to

work tackling a big pile of clothes I’d been putting off, hoping the mundane task would take my mind off things.

It didn’t. Every few moments my gaze strayed back to the

garage again.

DS Khan emerged in her all-in-one white jumpsuit and stood

outside the garage doors, talking on her mobile phone. She was

Indian with smooth dark skin and almond-shaped eyes. Tall, slim

and, before she’d donned the suit, immaculately turned out in black skinny trousers tucked into calf-high leather boots and a navy blue silk mac. She could easily have been a model. I wished the window

was open so I could hear her, but I’d shut it to drown out the noise.

I watched her, craning my neck, straining to hear, but the double

glazing Tom had put in all those years ago was so efficient I couldn’t 136

Where the Memories Lie

make out anything. She nodded a few times, frowning deeply.

I wanted to tell her not to do that too often or she’d end up with a wrinkled forehead later in life. Nadia always frowned from between

her eyebrows, so she had two tiny vertical lines above the bridge

of her nose that were barely noticeable. I, on the other hand, had

a more expressive face. My forehead was always creasing up in sur-

prise, or with a question, or when I made a humorous remark, and

the result was a very lined forehead.

I heard a sizzling sound and glanced down, noticing I’d

burned a brownish stain onto one of Ethan’s favourite salmon-pink

work shirts.

‘Shit!’ I yelled, as a raging anger exploded to the surface, which

wasn’t like me. I was usually pretty calm in a crisis, but I was

angry with Tom for putting us in this position. Angry with Ethan

for walking out and leaving me to deal with it when it was his own

dad who was involved in all this. Angry with myself for not doing

more to help Katie when I had the chance. And angry just because

I could be.

I practically threw the iron back in its holder on the ironing

board as tears sprang into my eyes.

When I glanced up DS Khan was off the phone and watching

me through the window. I gave her a half smile but it twitched on

my face and probably made me look as if I was having a stroke. She

didn’t smile back. Not a good sign. Instead, she disappeared back

inside the garage.

I switched the iron off, unable to concentrate on even that,

and left it sitting in the ironing board to cool, scowling at it. My stomach gurgled with a mixture of hunger and acidic reflux.

The phone rang, then, making me jump.

‘What’s going on?’ Nadia said when I picked it up. ‘I just drove

past your house and there’s some crime scene van there. Don’t tell