Whispers (15 page)

“I didn’t know any of this,” Teri said. “Why doesn’t she tell me these things?”

“Why don’t you tell her the things that you struggle with?”

He had her there. Teri had held back from her sister ever since her vacation had begun. Why did she think they were close?

“I’ll tell you why,” Dan said. “Because you both spent the majority of your lives in the fish bowl of being the pastor’s kids. I think it’s obvious, but Annie doesn’t see it. You both became conditioned to live in a way acceptable to the people who were watching you. Now nobody’s watching, but you haven’t figured out who the real you is. So when you hurt, instinct kicks in, and you hide where nobody can see your mistakes.”

“That’s pretty intense psychology there, Dr. Dan.”

He shrugged his shoulders and in an exaggerated German accent said, “I have been observing my patient for many, many years now. I believe she will need quite a few more years under my care before she is completely cured.”

Teri punched Dan’s arm. She admired him. Annie didn’t know what a prize her husband was. He understood her completely and loved her unconditionally.

That’s what Teri wanted. If truth be told, she was the jealous
one, jealous that Annie had such an incredible person to share her life with.

The sun was climbing through the clear morning sky as they turned up Highway 37 and headed toward the cloud-wreathed volcano.

“It’s so beautiful,” Teri murmured.

The road led them through Maui’s quiet upcountry. The lush green of the foothills and the abundance of colorful flowers reminded Teri of the Willamette Valley of Oregon.

“It’s so different from the beach. Do you guys come up here often? If I had island fever, I’d come up here for a few days.”

“Unfortunately, no. We’ve only been here a dozen or so times. With work and everything it’s hard to get away.”

They passed a few rickety looking mailboxes clumped together at the end of a tree-lined lane. “Do many people live up here?” Teri asked.

“Sure, lots of people. I have some friends up in Ulupalakua who are
paniolos
. I went to the rodeo with them last year in Makawao.”

“And I’m supposed to know what you’re talking about?”

“They’re cowboys. Actually,
paniolo
s is Hawaiian for
Espanoles.
”

“Cowboys from Spain?”

“California. One of the Hawaiian kings, Kam III, I think, brought three Spanish-Mexican cowboys over from California about 150 years ago to raise cattle. Some of the
paniolos
who work at Ulupalakua today are descendants of those three originals.”

“That’s quite a story,” Teri said.

“It’s true. It’s a whole different Maui up here.”

“Sounds like it,” Teri answered, gazing out the window at the breathtaking countryside as it rolled past her. She was only half-listening to Dan. Something had clicked inside her when
he had mentioned the Hispanic cowboys from California. She realized that since she had been here, she had seen the widest variety of cultural background she had seen anywhere.

In her small Oregon town, she was one of a handful of Hispanic residents. It had never been a problem, and she never had felt discriminated against. But always present in her mind was the underlying truth that she was different from the majority of the people in her community.

On Maui, however, the population was such a melting pot that she didn’t stick out. At least she didn’t feel as if she stuck out. If anything, she blended in with the natives because of her skin tone. It was one more reason she should consider moving to Maui.

I
s this the top?” Teri asked as Dan turned down a road marked by a sign that said “Hosmer Grove.”

“No, we’re only about seven thousand feet up. The top is more than ten thousand feet. This is where we’re meeting the rest of the group. The trail begins up the road from here.”

“I can’t imagine that winding road going much farther up.”

“Oh, it does.” Dan parked the car and looked out the windshield to see if any of the guys gathered around the picnic table were from their group. “It’s the only road in the world that goes from sea level to ten thousand feet in forty miles. Do you feel a little dizzy?”

“No.”

“Some people do. It’s an intense altitude adjustment. And it’s a lot colder up here. I’ve been to the top once when there was snow.”

“Snow? On Maui?”

Dan opened his door and called back to her, “You can even
ski on the Big Island when it snows.”

Teri pulled on her sweatshirt and joined Dan outside. It was chilly. She spotted Scott over at the picnic tables with Kai, Gordon, and a bunch of men she didn’t know.

Scott left them immediately and jogged over to her. He gave her a tender kiss on the cheek in full view of everyone and then tangled his fingers in her hair. “I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you, too,” Teri said. She found it easy to forgive him. After feeling angry and frustrated at him for not calling, all it took was one soft phrase and one tender touch, and she was putty.

With Scott’s arm around her and his fingers still playing with her curls, the two of them walked over to the group. Teri could feel Gordon’s smile on her before she actually looked at him. He watched every step she took and kept looking at her after she sat down on the top of the picnic table.

Spread out beside her were bags of food and other camping supplies. The men were talking about how they planned to divide it all up between the twelve backpacks.

“I think those of us with the bigger packs can handle most of it,” one of the men said. “And if any stuff is left over, you guys and Julie can take it.”

“This is Teri, not Julie,” Dan said. “I guess you all don’t know her. Annie’s sister, Teri.”

The man glanced at Scott and then back at Teri. “Teri,” he repeated. “My mistake. Nice to meet you. I’m Ron.”

The rest of the men introduced themselves in turn, and she tried to appear calm and casual. The coincidence was too obvious to ignore. First Scott called her Julie on the sailboat, and now some guy who sees Scott with her assumes her name is Julie.

As soon as the backpacks were loaded, Teri pulled Scott off
to the side under a grove of tall cedar and pine trees. “Who’s Julie?”

“Beats me,” he said. “Julie, Teri. The names sound pretty similar. I can see why he was mixed up.”

“And why did you get mixed up on the sailboat?”

“I didn’t get mixed up. Didn’t we already go over this?” Scott looked down at the ground and shook his head. It was almost a gesture of pity. “I thought you were going to work on this paranoia thing. When are you going to ease up and start trusting me?”

Teri felt ashamed.

“I’m sorry,” she said.

Scott cupped her chin in his hand and tilted her face up toward him. “No more ‘I’m sorry’s,’ remember?” Teri nodded.

Scott looked as if he were about to say something, but he was interrupted by a Frisbee that sailed inches past their heads.

“Whoa! Sorry there!” Gordon came jogging over to retrieve the Frisbee.

Teri pulled away and felt her cheeks warming. “Is everyone else ready?” She needed to talk with Scott but not here, not like this.

“Looks like it,” Gordon said. “No hurry, though. We have all day to get there.”

“Dan said you’ve been on this hike before, Gordon,” Teri said.

“That’s right. Quite a few years back. We hiked out through Kaupo Gap and down to the ocean. Can’t go that way any more. We have to hike out the way we go in.” Gordon began walking back to the picnic tables.

Teri followed him with Scott beside her, his arm around her shoulder.

“Can you smell them?” Gordon asked.

“What, Dan and the boys are smelling bad already?” Scott joked.

Gordon ignored Scott, caught Teri’s eye, and drew in a deep breath. She did the same. “It’s the eucalyptus trees. I haven’t smelled them since I left home.”

Gordon drew in another breath of the strong eucalyptus. Teri glanced at Scott as he rolled his eyes. “I like it, too,” Teri said, suddenly feeling she needed to come to Gordon’s defense. “We had eucalyptus trees in Escondido. Do you remember those gigantic ones at the back of the school, Scott?”

Scott looked at her as if to communicate that the last thing he would remember about high school was a tree.

“You two went to high school together?” Gordon asked.

“Sort of. Same school, different years.” Teri didn’t feel she had to explain anything to Gordon, but she wanted to.

They all hoisted their backpacks over their shoulders, tugged up their socks, laced their hiking boots, and started on their way. Teri had borrowed Annie’s boots, which fit a little loose. She was wearing two pairs of socks, and they seemed to feel just right.

They hiked along the side of the winding road, single file, until they reached the trail head of the Halemauu Trail. The minute the crater came into full view, Teri stopped and caught her breath. She hadn’t expected all the colors. Thick clouds hung over the higher pinnacles farther up the road. But where the group entered the crater, the sun shone and an eerie wind blew up at them.

“There’s no place like it on earth,” Gordon said to Teri and two other hikers who had stopped to catch their breath. He took a swig from his water bottle. “Wait until we get inside. You’ll think you’re on the moon.”

“By any chance, does anyone know the last time when this
guy erupted?” Teri asked, gazing down into the deep crevices.

“Late seventeen hundreds, I think,” Gordon said.

“That doesn’t mean he’s thinking of blowing off a little steam any time soon, does it?”

“No, safe as a kitten. They monitor all activity at Science City up at the top. I had a friend who worked there,” Gordon said. “I went up the night Haley’s Comet whizzed by. Had a good look through his telescope. One of the thrills of my life.”

“Doesn’t take much to entertain you, does it, Gordo?” Scott said.

“No, not much at all.”

They headed down the trail and into the silence of the crater. Teri’s water bottle, strung to the back of her pack, flapped against her thigh as she walked.
Good. Pound that fat, you little water bottle, you. Break up that cellulite!
She decided she might need to switch sides halfway through so both thighs could come out evenly by the end of the trip.

Once they settled into their individual rhythms of hiking, the group was pretty spread out. She was about four from the back, not too slow and not at all interested in pushing to the lead.

Scott kept pushing forward. He seemed to want her right behind him, but then he would pass someone, which would put a person between them.

Finally, after the third break, she said, “Why don’t you go on ahead. I’m doing fine at my own pace.”

“But I want you with me,” Scott said.

“I’ll try to keep up,” Teri said with a shrug. “But I can’t make any guarantees. This is supposed to be fun, not a race.”

That was the wrong thing to say to Scott. Teri realized that, being intensely competitive, he found it hard to make this a leisurely stroll. He was out to conquer the volcano.

“Just go ahead of me,” Teri said. “I’ll be fine. I’ll see you at
the cabin or sooner, if we stop for lunch.”

“You sure you don’t mind?”

“No, have fun. Go knock yourself out. I’m not up for it.”

Scott took off without even glancing back. Teri looked at her trail companions: two men younger than she whom she hadn’t met until today. “So, are you guys ready to hit the road?”

Her releasing of Scott must have had an effect on the two guys because they began to walk faster. Soon they were a good distance down the trail from Teri, and she realized she was now at the end of the group. This is not what she had wanted. She didn’t want to be the weak female who couldn’t carry her own weight or keep up with the men. The truth was, they were all in great shape from running around the hotel, hoisting heavy luggage for hours every day. She had been lying around for more than a week with a hurt foot. And it was beginning to feel a little tender now.

Why did I ever come on this trip? I mean, it’s beautiful, but I could have seen this from the car and turned around and gone home
.

Then slipping into a conversation with God, she prayed, “I certainly hope you have a good reason for bringing me on this journey.”