Who's Sorry Now (2008) (24 page)

The old doctor looked into her eyes, a calculating, professional glance that seemed to probe right to the heart of her. His gaze was like a knife scraping away the veneer of the fabricated tale she’d created, to reveal the worm of truth beneath. Carmina’s heart almost stopped beating. Could he tell she lied, just by looking into her eyes? Momma always said a woman could sense when her own daughter was pregnant; was that why she’d brought her here? Was she about to be unmasked?

The doctor asked when her period had been due, if anything was worrying her, or if she’d been feeling off-colour in other ways. ‘Maybe you’ve eaten something which doesn’t agree with you.’

‘I have not!’

‘Well, I’d say from this initial examination, that you are not pregnant, Carmina.’

Carlotta clapped her hands to her cheeks in relief. ‘It ees the miracle, doctor. My daughter, she is not going to shame us, after all?’

‘She wouldn’t be the first to bring such grief to her parents, Carlotta, and I’m sure you’d survive. Nevertheless, I see no signs to cause you any undue alarm. Bring her back to see me in a month if she still hasn’t had a show,’ and a bemused Carmina found herself ushered out of the surgery by her delighted mother.

Outside on the pavement, Carlotta hugged her recalcitrant daughter tight, and reverted to her native tongue, the words pouring out of her in a rush of ecstatic relief. ‘Thank goodness you made a mistake, and you are not pregnant at all. Your life will not be ruined, and we can tell Luc that he doesn’t have to marry you. Oh, and what a blessing for poor Gina! Now we can only hope she can find it in her heart to forgive his infidelity and the two of them can start afresh.’

Carlotta wagged a finger in her face. ‘As for you, madam, I hope you have learned a big lesson from this scare. If you are bad girl and forced to marry a man who doesn’t love you, you will never find happiness.’

‘Luc
does
love me. He was only flirting with Gina, and feeling sorry for her. And I had him first, remember.’

Carlotta gazed at her daughter with a sad expression in her brown eyes. ‘He haunts the house every day looking for her, like a man possessed. Accept it, Carmina, it is Gina he loves, not you. If you make him marry you, he will hate you all his life. Leave him be, Carmina. Find another man to love.’

She grasped her daughter’s shoulders with both hands and gave her a little shake. ‘And you listen to what your momma tell you about respect in future. You be the good girl, next time,
si
?’

Carmina was thinking, next time I’ll have to be much, much cleverer.

‘I’m not sure it’s possible to start again, Luc. How can I simply pretend that this didn’t happen?’

The pair of them were sitting in the parlour, the door firmly closed in order to give the couple the necessary privacy to discuss this delicate issue, but Gina was all too aware of the rest of her family keeping quiet in the other room.

She’d resisted long and hard the pressure to speak to him, her parents surprising her by their insistence that she at least give the boy a chance. In the end, partly because she simply had to be sure she was doing the right thing in turning her back on her love for Luc, she’d finally agreed.

Now that he was actually here, seated beside her on the sofa, Gina could hardly bear to look at him. She clasped her hands between her knees so that they weren’t tempted to reach out and touch him. She could sense his discomfort, his embarrassment and anxiety, and knew if she were to look into his eyes she would be lost.

‘I don’t know what more I can say, Gina. It isn’t true, none of it. Surely you can see that now. I can’t tell you how much I regret letting things go as far as they did. I shouldn’t have believed Carmina when she told me you’d chucked me. If I’d got your letter, it might all have been different. It’s you that I love, Gina, believe me. What more can I do to convince you?’

The power of his emotion almost overwhelmed her, yet how could she be sure? How could she trust him?

‘My sister is very beautiful. If she crooks her little finger one more time, will you fall again for her charms?’

He took Gina’s hands in his own, tenderly stroking each finger. ‘
No
, I swear it. I swear it on my life. Look, give me a chance, at least. I’m not asking for you to make any long-reaching promises. Let’s just start seeing each other again, and see what happens. Perhaps, in time, I can convince you that I’m sorry for what happened, and you’ll come to trust me again.’

Gina stared at their joined hands, then pulling away began to pick at a thread on her pink Capri pants. ‘I’m not sure.’

‘Can’t we at least be friends? Please? I told you once that you would never lose me and I still stand by that. If you want me, that is.’

She looked at him then, straight into the soul-searching depths of his blue eyes, as dark and mysterious as the sea itself and felt such a wave of love for him it almost swamped her. Could she even bring herself to turn away when she loved him so much, or was it already too late? He might look, and sound, completely sincere, but was it safe for her to love him, or did she risk being hurt all over again?
 

Gina’s mind was in turmoil and when still she said nothing, those same dark eyes became clouded with anxiety. ‘Gina, please say you’ll forgive me.’

She swallowed, except that her throat seemed blocked by emotion. She thought of all the times in her life when she’d needed to dig deep into herself to find the strength to go on, to harden her heart against the pain. She did that now. ‘I’m not sure I
can
believe in your so-called innocence. It’s your word against my sister’s. Who am I supposed to believe?’

‘But you admit that Carmina tells lies.’

‘Sometimes, yes.’

‘Well then?’

Could all this talk of a baby have been another deliberate lie? Surely not. Even Carmina wouldn’t go that far, for how could she possibly have got away with it? Even if Momma and Doc Mitchell hadn’t found her out, it would soon have become obvious that there was no baby, that there never had been. More likely she’d been so anxious to catch Luc, she’d imagined herself pregnant, when really she was only a little overdue, perhaps worrying herself into a stew. Clearly not pregnant at all. A silly mistake. But that didn’t prove she hadn’t had cause for concern.

Gina said, ‘I don’t believe Carmina would make up a tale over something so serious, so important. I think this time you are the guilty one, making excuses for your bad behaviour.’

A spasm of pain flickered across his face and, despite herself, Gina’s heart went out to him. Perhaps it wasn’t entirely Luc’s fault. Where was her compassion? Momma said men were weak, and how could anyone resist her scheming, beautiful sister when Carmina had set her heart on something she wanted? She should perhaps feel just a little sorry for him.

‘I think I understand why it happened. Carmina is hard to resist. Maybe - just possibly, and I’m not making any promises - but I might be prepared to be friends again. No more than that for the present. No kissing, no cuddling, nothing of that sort. We take things slowly and see how things go.’

His expression was instantly transfused with joy and Luc captured her hands again and brought them to his lips to kiss them. ‘I’ll spend my entire life making it up to you, Gina, I swear.’
 

The entire Bertalone family were delighted with this good news. As the young couple emerged from the front parlour, Luc’s arm wrapped about a shyly smiling Gina, everyone cheered. Carlotta clapped her hands with joy.

‘All is going to be well. Oh, what a relief! I am a happy Momma again. Carmina is not in trouble and has promised to be a good girl in future. And Gina is happy and content with Luc.’ She rushed over to kiss them both in her fervent Italian way.

Papa shook Luc by the hand, then slapping a firm hand on his shoulder led him away from the knot of excited children. ‘You will behave with more respect with my daughters in future, young man?’

‘
Si
, Mr Bertalone, I will, I swear. You have my word on it.’

‘I won’t have Gina hurt. She is very special to us, all our children are. They are
mio famiglia
. I have the
amore paterno
, a father’s love for them all. But Gina is extra-special because of the problems she has had to surmount.’

Luc was nodding. ‘Like I told you before, Mr Bertalone, she is special to me too. She is so kind, so gentle and sweet, so sensitive and generous. I feel fortunate that she is prepared to try and repair our friendship. She has even agreed, with your permission, to come to the dance with me tonight. I will take good care of her, I promise, and have her home in good time.’

‘Dancing is hard for her. You make-a sure she don’t-a get too tired.’

Papa Bertalone nipped the bridge of his nose while he tried to work out how best to say what he needed to say. ‘And you will take better care over this problem with Carmina? She has always been a leetle wild. That girl she act first, think later. I’m sure there is no real harm in her but she is
bellissimo
, and like all beautiful women a little
vano, si
? So vain she expect the world to be dropped at her feet. Do not let her steal your world, the one you share with Gina. You behave. Understand me?’

‘I understand, Mr Bertalone. I will take better care.’ What else could he say, if they all chose to take Carmina’s word and not his?

Gina was trying to hear what it was that Luc was saying to her father, but she was too far away, the sound of their voices drowned by her chattering siblings.

And then for some reason everyone stopped speaking and Luc’s voice seemed to ring out clear and strong in the small living room. ‘Gina has given me another chance and I’ve no intention of ruining it. Nothing and nobody will make me spoil things between us ever again. I have learned my lesson.’

He glanced across at Carmina as he said this. She was sitting white-faced with fury in the corner, not joining in the general hub-bub.

She couldn’t quite believe what she was hearing. How dare Luc deliberately drop her and go back to her sanctimonious sister? Carmina felt again that spine-tingling hatred for her sibling who had managed to rob her of everything she’d ever wanted in life: her parents approbation, the full and undivided attention she deserved, and now the man she loved. She’d watched in disgust as her brothers and sisters crowded around to wish the reunited pair well. How could they all be so damned
happy
!

They should have been congratulating herself and Luc on their coming nuptials, not Gina. Instead, all her efforts, all her plans and schemes, had come to nothing. Her feelings, even her place in this family were given no consideration at all. Now Papa was opening a bottle of wine, declaring they had much to celebrate as family honour had been restored.

‘Come, Carmina,’ he called to her. ‘Come and be happy with us.’

When still she didn’t move from her chair to join in the celebrations, Carlotta marched over and gave her daughter a nudge.

‘Stop sulking. Come and tell your sister how sorry you are, and that you won’t do anything to spoil her chances ever again. Tell her!’

‘It’s all right,’ Gina said. ‘I’m not asking for an apology.’

‘Just as well, since you won’t get one,’ Carmina bit back.

Carlotta patted her own plump cheeks in despair. ‘What am I to do with her? Papa, make your daughter say that she will be the good girl and behave. I want no more lies.’

Papa Bertalone attempted to look stern, not easy with Lela cuddling up on his lap begging for a sip from his glass, and Marta and Gabby playing marbles at his feet. He’d had a hard day in the ice-cream parlour and was really far too weary to deal with any more female angst and emotion. All he wanted was his supper, a little snooze, and some peace in his life.

‘I have spoken to Luc, my love, man to man. You have spoken to Carmina. Enough has been said, Momma. Let this be an end to the matter. Gina and Luc will either make a go of it, or they won’t. It is up to them now.

Only the expression in her sister’s hard glare warned Gina that the matter was very far from closed, certainly so far as Carmina was concerned.

Chapter Twenty-Three

Carmina went to the Friday night dance too, despite having no partner, her friends complaining that they’d never known her to be in such a foul mood. They kept well out of her way while Carmina made a complete exhibition of herself dancing and necking with boys who were perfect strangers to her, and in full view of everyone. She seemed more reckless than ever, as if she had something to prove.

How could Luc treat her so callously? One minute prepared to do the decent thing and stand by her, the next giving her the cold shoulder and making up with her dratted sister. To add insult to injury Carmina caught a glimpse of him across the dance floor with Gina in his arms.

She felt as if she were burning up inside, wanted to walk over and push the stupid girl away. What right had she to steal the man Carmina had planned to marry herself? Selfish little bitch!

The lovebirds were doing a slow waltz to
Blueberry Hill
, so Gina’s limp didn’t show too much. Luc was holding her close but, come to think of it, they didn’t give the impression of being lovebirds at all. They weren’t exactly dancing cheek to cheek. Gina wasn’t even looking at him. She had her hands resting loosely on his shoulders, holding him away from her at a safe distance, while she gazed about at the other dancers. She was clearly not at all happy to be there. And Carmina could tell by her manner that she still hadn’t forgiven him.