Wild Fire (15 page)

Anne used it as a place to pray. She'd seen Anne in the evenings standing on the deck and staring into space, her expression empty yet somehow filled with peace.

I wish I could do that
. Dad and Mom had told her God was always there. If that was true, why couldn't she find Him?

She tried to concentrate on the ripple of water in the river and the dry, dusty smell of rocks and earth. But her thoughts refused to change focus.
God never changes
.

If He never changes, then He's always there
.

But if He's always there, it must be me who's run away
.

She didn't even bother to wipe the tears off her cheeks. Everything was her fault. She was responsible for the distance between herself and God. She fought Anne's attempts to be her friend. She was surly with Ryan.

Her thoughts tumbled on.
I'm more worried about where my name came from than I am about taking care of my little brother
.

Self-pity doesn't cut it, Wakara. Let go and get a grip on God
.

“Oh, great. Now Colin's in on it.” But she knew the voice in her head was right.

“I've been trying to do it all myself, haven't I, God?” She could barely hear her own whisper, but she knew He could hear. “I've been so busy blaming everybody else for my pain. I've been so mad at You, I haven't even let You help me.”

What was it Anne had said? “There is a wild fire raging in your heart, Little Moon. Anger burns you up inside. But God's Spirit is a cleansing fire. If you let Him, He will purify your soul.”

She wrapped her arms around her knees and hugged them to her chest. The stars flashed bright in the clear, dark sky. They looked close enough to touch. Mom was out there. In heaven. Out beyond the stars. “I want her here with me,” Kara prayed, “but if she can't be, will You please come instead? I need You. I can't do this alone.”

The night settled around her like a warm, dark quilt. She felt a strange sort of comfort in the rustling of leaves, the trickling of water over rock. A breeze fanned the hair
along her cheeks. She brushed the tickling sensation away and inhaled the warm, pine-scented air.

My peace I give to you . . . do not let your heart be troubled and do not be afraid
. The Scripture came back to her, vivid and fresh as if she'd memorized it yesterday. And she felt the warmth of God's love, like a fire in her heart.

When Kara got back to her room, Tia was sitting upright on her cot, searching the room with her flashlight.

“Tia?” Kara closed the door behind her and kept her voice low. “What are you doing?”

“Looking for my shoes,” Tia whispered. “Where have you been? I was coming to find you. I wanted to make sure you were okay and tell you I'm going home. Your dad can fly me out in the morning when he takes Ryan to the doctor.”

Kara frowned and sat on the end of the cot. “Why?”

“You gotta be kidding! I really screwed up, didn't I? Blubbering all over the place. I'm no good in an emergency. All I do is get in the way and make everybody mad. Besides, this place is too dangerous for me. You and Colin can handle it. I can't. End of story.”

Kara didn't know what to say. Tia was right. She had been in the way during the rescue.

“He likes you, you know. I wasn't really trying to take him away, just having some fun,” Tia said miserably.

“What are you talking about?”

“Don't be a stupe. Anyone with half a brain can see Colin's interested in you.” She pulled her legs up, wrapped her arms around them, and lowered her chin to her knees. “I'm sorry I ruined our week.”

“Now who's being a stupe?” An hour ago Kara had been thinking the same thing. But it really hadn't been all Tia's fault.

“Look, I'm the one who's sorry. I haven't been a very good friend lately.” Tia was staring at her, so she hurried on. “And anyway, Colin isn't interested in either of us. He's Greg's age. We're just kids to him.”

“Right. If you believe that, you're worse than a stupe; you're blind.”

Kara yawned. “Okay, okay. But can't we talk about it in the morning?” She suddenly felt like she'd wrestled a grizzly. She ached all over, and her cuts and bruises stung. She was so tired she couldn't think past morning, yet she felt a quietness inside that hadn't been there in a long, long time.

This time when she slipped into her bed, she fell instantly asleep.

K
ARA BLINKED AT THE BRIGHT
sunlight flooding through the window. The whine of an airplane engine drew her out of bed just as the door opened and Tia crept into the room
.

Kara rubbed her eyes. “Wow, I must have really slept. What's going on? Is that Mark with the new guests?” She grabbed for her jeans. “Rats, they're supposed to go in cabin one and it's not even clean yet.”

Tia laughed. “Will you relax? Anne and I cleaned the cabin, but those people aren't coming. Mark called on the radio. The guests canceled, so he's flying in Doctor Glenn instead.”

She stopped and took a deep breath. “That means your dad's not flying out, so you'll like have to put up with me until Mark leaves.”

“Oh, Tia.” Kara wrapped her friend in a hug. “What would I do without you? Please don't go. Wait until the end of the week.”

“You mean that?” Tia's face crumbled. Kara was relieved when she sniffed and smiled. “Cool. I'll stay, as long as you promise not to work me to death.”

“It's a promise. You can sit and watch Anne and me get ready to close the place. We won't even try to make you feel guilty.” She grinned and shrugged into a clean cotton shirt. “Come on. The plane's landed and I want to hear what the doctor has to say about Ryan.”

She ran a comb through her hair, swiped at her teeth with the toothbrush, and hurried out onto the front deck. Dad and Doc Glenn were heading up the hill with Mark and two other men trailing behind.

She shielded her eyes and stared. “Greg?”

Tia was right behind her. “Oh yeah, I forgot. Greg came with. When those people canceled, your dad decided to close the lodge early. Greg and Mr. Davis are supposed to take the horses out.”

“Boy, that'll teach me to sleep late.” She grinned at Tia. “Is there anything else I should know about?”

“Well, Anne said if you want any bacon or juice you'd better grab it before the men get here. Ryan's already had his share and more.”

Kara grabbed a glass of juice and a bagel, and followed the men into Ryan's room. Ry was lying on his stomach with his head and arms hanging over the edge of the bed, playing with a couple of plastic cowboy figures.

The doctor ordered everybody but Dad out of the room. Kara and Tia had to jump back when the door opened again. Both Dad and Doc were smiling.

“He'll be fine in a day or two. Wounds are nice and clean. Your cook did a good job with the aloe vera. The tetanus shot and these antibiotics should take care of the rest.”

Doc stowed his medical kit in the back of Mark's plane and pulled out his fishing rod. “Since I'm here, I might as well take back a souvenir.”

When Doc and Mark had disappeared upriver, Dad called a family meeting. “Looks like we close up a week early. Kara, you and Tia help Anne get the cabins in shape. I'd like Colin to see if he can shore up that barn.

“Greg and Bud will take the horses out on Friday. We'll leave Lily and Dakota here just in case. Colin can ride out when everything's done. Agreed?”

“I can ride Lily out, Dad.” Kara tensed, expecting him to say no, but he surprised her.

“Let's wait and see, Sugar Bear. It depends on what needs doing at home.”

In spite of her teasing that they were working her to death, Tia pitched in and helped with the chores. The cabins were stripped of linens, floors scrubbed, windows sealed tight. By Friday afternoon, the only things left to clean were the bedrooms in the lodge.

Kara woke up at 5
A.M.
on Saturday with an uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach. She had dreamed about Mom again last night. Not the usual nightmare about running through the fire. This time she was back at the grave site, saying a final good-bye.

The dream faded, but her cheeks stayed damp with tears.
August 28. Tomorrow it will have been a year
. Bad enough, but Dad had an appointment in Lariat and was flying Tia out today. She wished he wouldn't go.

“You and Ry stay and help Colin and Anne finish up,” he had said. But when she asked why he couldn't just take Ryan with him, he hadn't given her an answer. Not a good one anyway.

“Ryan's back is still sore. I want him to rest another day or two.” He kissed her brow. “Don't worry, Sugar Bear, I'll be back to get Ryan and Anne Monday morning. If the weather holds, you can ride out with Colin. Greg will be waiting at the trailhead with a trailer.”

The thought struck her,
Maybe Dad wants to be alone
. She sighed and swung her legs over the edge of the bed. Dad had said he wanted to get an early start. It was time to wake Tia.

Kara hooked her thumbs over the front pockets of her jeans and watched Dad load Tia's bag into the Cessna. “Thanks for all the help, Tia. I'm really glad you got to come,” she said.

“Yeah. I guess it all turned out okay.” Tia sighed. “Anyway, two weeks and it's back to the school zone.” Her face brightened. “Hey, when you get home we'll have to hit the sales!”

Dad was motioning Tia to come. “Gotta go. See you in a few.”

Dad had one foot on the wing, ready to hoist himself into the cockpit. Kara was about to turn away when he stepped down and walked back to her. His brow wrinkled as he squinted against the glaring sun.

“Mark says there's another fire burning over behind Falcon Ridge. I'm sure it won't get this far, but everything's so dry. Remember, no campfire or barbecue, okay?”

“Don't worry, Dad, we'll be fine.”

She shielded her eyes to watch the plane take off. When it disappeared behind a ridge of Ponderosa pines, she swung her gaze to the right and noticed thunderheads building over Cedar Butte.

Back at the lodge she found Anne in the kitchen packing up her fishing gear.

“There are still fish at Otter Lake. I will bring some for our dinner.” She hoisted the gear onto a backpack and started for the door.

“Why the backpack?”

“Colin is checking the fence line. He has Dakota. I will walk.”

Kara felt the flush spread up her neck and blossom into two hot patches on her cheeks. She took a deep breath. How could she have been so selfish before? “Please take Lily.”

Anne turned and smiled at her gently. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.” She felt that strange sense of quiet inside, like she'd felt the other night. “I really want you to.”

When Anne left, Kara peeked in on Ryan. He had fallen asleep on his stomach, arms dangling over the edge of the bed, a comic book spread across the throw rug on the floor.