Winter's Destiny (18 page)

Amy closed her eyes and leaned back against him, allowing his touch to caress her. She was no longer cold. A new warmth flooded her body. She felt his cheek touch hers and his arms close around her. She turned, her lips touching his jaw, her fingertips reaching up to stroke his cheek. He pulled away.

“Timing’s bad, Amy.” he said getting up.

Amy grabbed his arm. “Timing?” she repeated, her eyes searching his. “How can you say that? If you hadn’t pulled the trigger the second you did, I wouldn’t be here. The bastard would have drowned me. And, if you hadn’t dragged me out of the river at the exact moment that you did, I’d be floating out in the Pacific by now. Your timing is perfect. I’m alive.”

She tugged on his arm until he sat back down. He swallowed hard and looked away. Amy waited for him to look back at her.

“The river had turned dangerous by the time you jumped in. You’ve risked your life for me. That’s twice counting the fire. It’s almost incomprehensible that you’d do that once, never mind twice.” Her voice was choked with emotion. “You gave me another chance to live, to be with my son,” she whispered, “and to do so much more with my life than I have. You’re a brave, selfless man, Dallas. And I’m so grateful…”

She half-turned, her gray eyes intent upon him. “When I was in the river, I promised myself that if I got out…I would find Jamie and start a new life.”

Amy reached up and put her hands around his neck, drawing his face close to her own. She kissed him softly.

Turning to face him, she felt his hands pressing on the small of her back, pulling her into his embrace. His lips brushed her cheek, and her lips. Suddenly, she was being lifted out of the water. He let her feet touch the bath mat, and with gentle strokes, dried her with one of the thick white towels. Then, he carried her to the bed and placed her gently on the duvet.

His body, muscular and lean, pressed against hers, his hands caressed her, and suddenly she drifted into a strange new world of sensations. Her body reacted to his touch in ways she never believed possible. She wanted him.

They became one and the move tore her breath away, launching her into a world of color, emotion, and sensations not of this earth.

Afterward, near dawn, she slept nestled in the crook of his arms, her cheek against his chest, his heart beating in time to her own. She dreamed that she found Jamie.

Amy awoke to find his pale blue eyes gazing at her. “Morning,” she whispered sleepily.

“You’re beautiful,” Dallas murmured, his eyes never leaving her face. The morning sun filtered into the room, dancing over the golden strands of hair and across her translucent skin. He stroked her hair, wondering what was happening to him. He had loved Ellen and believed himself incapable of ever loving another woman. But now he found himself looking at the face of a woman who had captured his heart. How exactly had this happened?

Dallas placed his lips gently over hers. A strange mix of emotion flooded through him. He wanted to protect her, to care for her, and to carry her away to a safe place where no harm could come to her. He wanted to be with her every minute. He craved her touch, her smile, and her embrace.

Suddenly, he was walking new terrain and contending with emotions, desires, and needs foreign to him. He thought he knew himself, but he realized that a man could never really know himself. Things change, and before you know it, a man finds himself in uncharted territory wondering if his body and mind are betraying him or whether he’s at a crossroad, with a new life waiting for him.

“What are you thinking, Dallas?”

He pushed a lock of her hair off her face. “I’d like to spend the whole day here, with you.”

She smiled. “I wish that were possible. Maybe we should plan that for a day down the road, when things are normal again.”

Dallas sat up. “Hm. Normal. What's normal, I wonder?" He sat up. "Hungry?”

Amy slipped out of bed. “Now that you mention it, I am.”

He watched as she walked to the shower. She was exquisite. Her long straight back gave way to a tiny waist that rounded out over the soft curve of her hips. A single tress of long, wavy hair cascaded down her back. She moved gracefully on slim, shapely legs. Her arms were slender; her hands and fingers delicate. She half turned and smiled at him. His eyes traveled back up her body, along her neck, to the perfect structure of her facial bones. Her beauty was breathtaking.

While they dressed, Dallas said to her, “I don’t understand how your husband could leave you.”

Amy shrugged.

“Do you love him?” Dallas asked.

She looked up in surprise. “I did, in the beginning.” She thought for a few minutes. “Dan changed a lot after Jamie was born. He pulled away from me. Time passed and after a while, my feelings for him began to diminish.” Amy sat down on the bed and put on her socks. “Our marriage mutated into a routine. At some point Dan’s career, his personal life—and it seems his sex life, were fulfilled outside our home.
Home
to Dan had become a place where he stored his things, including Jamie and me.” She looked away, thoughtfully. “The other night, when Dan left me, I should have felt a huge sense of loss. I admit, I felt a lot of things, but
loss
wasn’t one of them. In fact, I felt relief. That really surprised me.”

Dallas was thoughtful. “Did you know him for long before you were married?”

“Couple of years. We met at university”

“Did he introduce you to his family?”

Amy rubbed her eyes. “His sister Nita, of course. She’s the only family he has.”

“Where are his parents?”

“They were killed when Dan was a teenager.”

“Like yours.” It was a statement, not a question.

Amy looked up at Dallas. “Yes.”

“That gave you a common bond.”

“Yes, I suppose.”

“Did Dan ever talk to you about his parents?”

“No. He didn’t like to talk about them.”

“And he probably didn’t like you talking about yours either.”

Amy stayed very still. “What are you saying, Dallas?”

“Did you ever meet any of his other relatives, you know, cousins, aunts, uncles?”

“No,” she said hesitantly.

“Friends from his childhood?”

“No,” Amy repeated.

“Didn’t that strike you as unusual?”

“Not really. A tragedy like that is devastating. It kind of knocks you out of orbit. Nothing in your life is normal after that, so how do you judge what’s
unusual?
”

Dallas sat down, his forearms resting across his knees.

“Dallas, what is it? ”

He was silent, his thumbnail rubbing his brow. Abruptly he stood. “Let’s go for breakfast. I’m starved.”

“I can’t go out dressed like this. I look like a vagabond.”

Dallas laughed. “You look just fine.” He pulled her toward him and kissed her, “In fact, you look wonderful.”

They walked through the state park and down the boardwalk, the sun-bleached wood shifting ever so slightly under their weight. They stopped to watch the breakers roll onto the beach. Rays of morning sun bounced from the mist that hovered above the break line, creating a rainbow. Above, gulls circled, their cry audible over the roar of the sea.

“This is one of my favorite places,” Dallas told her, putting an arm around her shoulders. “I came here a lot after Ellen and I split up. There’s something about the place.” He rested his right foot on the log bench. “Did a lot of thinking right here. We’ll have to come back, Amy, when things settle down.

Amy noticed his introspective look and wondered if he was recalling the insights he had gleaned here.

Finally, he said, “Ellen was the love of my life. I couldn’t visualize a future without her.”

“
Time
,” Amy told him. “It changes everything. No matter how great the loss, time heals us enough so that we can
feel
again.”

He turned her around and put an index finger under her chin lifted her face to his. “The strange part is, what I feel now, I never felt with Ellen.”

Amy reached up and touched his hand. “I know. I kind of feel that way too. I co-existed with Dan. After he left, I thought back over our time together and realized our relationship as man and wife had disintegrated completely. I’d stopped loving him, but he had to leave me before I could face that fact.” The breeze blew her hair across her eyes. She brushed it away. “I have feelings for you that overwhelm me, but my life is in such a mess right now--”

“I know.” Dallas guided her back onto the sandy boardwalk. “You’re doing great.”

They walked, arms around the other, to the door of
The Sunset Café, a
small beachfront restaurant on the sand. They climbed the driftwood steps to the wide covered balcony and pulled open the weather-beaten door. “I met Nita here for lunch once,” Amy told Dallas as he led her across the shiplap floors to an alcove overlooking the bay. They squeezed around the small table for two and sat down.

Dallas slid the vase of fresh flowers to the side of the table. “Were you close to Nita?”

“Not close, no. She and Brandon weren’t able to have kids of their own, so they wanted Jamie to stay with them as often as possible. I never was  happy about that, but Dan insisted. I never did spend much time with them. Occasionally, Nita and I would go shopping together, or to a cafe. Once in a while she and Brandon came to supper. That’s about it. She’s not a warm, fuzzy person. In fact, she’s so tainted, it’s hard to have a normal conversation with her.”

Dallas looked at Amy thoughtfully. “Did Nita ever discuss her parents?”

Amy shrugged. “No, she and Dan were alike that way. Neither of them would open up.” Amy adjusted her chair so she could see the ocean. “But that’s not an unusual response.”

“What about you? Is it hard for you to talk about your parents?”

“Depends. After they died it was a long time before I could function like a normal human being. Talking about it takes me back to that dark time. I don’t like going there unprepared.”

The waitress brought them two Ship’s Logs that served as a binder for the menus, and Amy realized that she was famished. They ordered Captain’s breakfasts and coffee. She looked at Dallas and tilted her head. “Why all these questions about Dan’s parents?”

“I’m trying to work things out.”

The waitress put a carafe of coffee and cups between them and returned a few minutes later with their breakfasts. Dallas reached for the salt, shaking it furiously onto his eggs and hash browns.

Amy watched in amazement. “Wow.”

“What?”

“Don’t you ever worry about high blood pressure…or worse?”

“Hell no. Blood pressure’s not even on the list.” he said digging in.

Avoiding the salt and pepper altogether, Amy picked up her fork and took a bite of bacon. “What’s on the list then?”

Dallas laughed. “Getting shot, or stabbed, or totaling the Yukon in a chase, you know, stuff like that,” he told her.

Amy nodded, “I guess they would take priority. How long have you been sheriff?”

“Fifteen years.”

She saw the pride in his expression. “You love your job, don’t you?”

“Most of the time.”

They ate in silence and when they were finished, Dallas reached for her hand. “There’s something you need to know about your husband, Amy. I’ve been trying to find a gentle way to say it, but there isn’t one."

Amy stiffened. “What is it, Dallas?”

“In my line of work coincidences don’t exist. When I found out that a Dr. George Johnstone was your mother’s OB/GYN, I got that old feeling in my gut.”

Amy nodded, “I know. It bothered me too. But both versions of the name are pretty common.”

“How about two OB/GYNs with almost identical names?” Dallas suggested.

“It seems pretty unusual,” Amy agreed.

“All right. I’m going to say this straight out, so here it is: your husband, Dan Johnson’s birth certificate reads, Daniel Oliver Johnstone. His name was legally changed when he was seventeen.”

Amy fell back in the chair and gaped at Dallas.

Dallas pulled up in front of a local family clothing store and outfitters. Amy looked at the display in the window. After what she’d just heard about Dan’s name being changed, Amy was in no mood to shop. She looked at the storefront. “Let’s go, Dallas. I don’t feel like buying clothes right now.”

“Go on,” he encouraged, “You need something to wear.”

She tugged at her jeans and coat. “I won’t be long.” She grabbed new jeans, sweaters, a bra, panties, socks, and a pair of sneakers, and was back in the truck in twenty minutes.

Dallas was shocked. “That must be a record.”

Amy dropped the shopping bags into the rear seat and reached for his arm. “Dallas, I’ve got the feeling you know more than you’re saying.”

He started the truck. “Well, I can tell you this. I was in Portland yesterday, seeing Maya. While I was there, I learned that Dr. George Johnstone’s wife, Vera Johnstone lives there. So, I dropped by. She’s not exactly the warm, fuzzy type, either, even though she used to be a nurse. Anyway, to make it brief,” he said, pulling out, “she confirmed that Dr. George Johnstone is her ex-husband, so while I was driving back, Deb did some checking for me. Vera Johnstone is Dan’s mother—”

Amy finished the sentence: “And they’re both very much alive.” Amy drummed her nails on the door panel. “All these years I believed that Dan, like me, had lost his parents.”

“If it’s any concession, not having known Vera Johnstone is a real plus. She’s one cold, calculating piece of work. It’s a wonder Dan turned out as well as he did.”

Amy speculated, “If she was a nurse, she could have assisted her husband with child births.”

“Very likely. The two have been separated some time, but I did persuade her to tell me where her husband is. Turns out, he has a place down the coast, near The Caves.”

Amy’s eyes widened in surprise. “He’s here, on the coast? I wonder just how much Dan and Nita have seen of their supposedly
dead
parents over the last seven years.” Amy wound her hair around her finger and gazed out the window. “No wonder you were asking me questions about Dan’s parents.” Thoughtfully, she asked, “Do you think Dan and Jamie are staying with Dr. Johnstone?”