Wish You Were Here (27 page)

‘Do you know what?' said Tom resting his
Rough Guide
on his chest. ‘It's just occurred to me that none of us have actually been in the sea all holiday.'

‘What's the point?' said Andy. ‘All that happens is you go in, you get wet, you come out, sand sticks to you and then you have to have a shower – sounds like a proper pain in the arse if you ask me.'

‘I'd love to go in,' said Lisa, ‘but my suncream isn't waterproof and I'd have to reapply the lot.'

‘What about you, Charlie?' asked Tom. ‘Fancy a swim?'

‘Nah,' I replied eyeing Lisa from behind my sunglasses. ‘I've always felt there's something undignified about men walking round topless. It's the snob in me.'

Andy sat up, yawned loudly and stretched. ‘I'm going to get some more water. Anyone else want anything?' Lisa asked for an ice cream while Tom requested a can of Coke. I declined. All I really wanted was an acknowledgement from Lisa that what had happened last night wasn't a figment of my imagination, so that I could stop feeling as if I was losing the plot.

‘Do you need someone to give you a hand?' Tom said. ‘I could do with a walk.'

‘Actually I've got it sorted,' said Andy quickly. He turned and looked at me and even though he was wearing his sunglasses I could tell that something was going on. ‘Charlie will give me a hand, won't you, mate?'

My heart froze mid-beat. ‘Yeah, of course.'

‘Oh, I see,' joked Lisa. ‘You want to have a quiet word with Charlie, is that it?'

‘Course not,' said Andy coolly. ‘Feel free to come if you want.'

Lisa looked over at me and I saw a flash of anxiety in her blue-green eyes. ‘No thanks,' she replied. ‘You two go and do your boy thing.'

We trudged barefoot across the hot sand until we were out of earshot.

‘So what's going on?' I asked.

‘Nothing really,' said Andy, looking over his shoulder at Lisa and Tom. ‘I just couldn't think of any other way of getting you on your own.'

‘On my own for what?'

‘To talk.'

‘About what?'

‘Nina.'

‘So what have you decided? Are you going to carry on seeing her or call it quits?'

‘Well, that's sort of what I wanted to talk about.'

Without waiting for my response Andy walked out of the entrance to the beach, crossed the road and sat down on the wall outside the mini-market. There were a couple of girls chatting to each other just to the left of him. Neither of them noticed me as I sat down only a few feet away from them. I was invisible.

‘I know I don't act like it,' began Andy, ‘but the truth is Lisa really does mean the world to me. You won't understand but this holiday and the things I've done . . . they aren't anything to do with her at all. It's all been about me.' Andy paused and stared at me as if trying to judge whether I was buying into his argument. What he saw I don't know, but when I looked into his sunglasses in a return bid to see his soul, all I could see was my own reflection.

‘Well if all that's true,' I replied, ‘why are we talking now?'

‘Because somehow things have got messed up,' said Andy. ‘Last night I came up with the excuse of getting those extra bottles of raki so that I could call Nina and tell her that I wouldn't be seeing her again. But as soon as I told her she started telling me how good we were together and how we ought to at least give things a try. And even though I kept telling her “no”, at the back of my mind I knew that I wanted to say “yes”.'

‘So you're going to carry on seeing Nina behind Lisa's back?'

‘No,' replied Andy. ‘I've decided that when we get back from holiday I'm going to leave her.'

Andy waited for my reaction.

‘So what do you think?' he asked eventually. ‘Am I losing it? Am I doing the wrong thing? Tell me what I should do?'

I wanted to tell him to leave her. I wanted to tell him that he didn't deserve her. I even wanted to tell him about what had happened last night. But I didn't say anything. Instead I remembered that despite everything Andy was still one of my closest friends in the world and deserved the best advice I could give irrespective of its consequences to me.

‘If you leave her it will be a mistake,' I said firmly.

‘Maybe, but right now I feel it's the only thing I can do.'

‘You're not thinking straight. You can't be. You're talking about leaving someone you've been with for nearly seven years for a girl you've known only a few days. Does that sound like the action of someone who is thinking straight?'

‘It is what it is,' said Andy.

‘What does that mean?' I replied. ‘It doesn't mean anything. It's one of those meaningless phrases people say when they can't justify whatever ridiculous act of self destruction they're about to do next.'

There was a long silence and the two girls sitting next to Andy stood up and walked away. I couldn't think of what else to say. I couldn't think of how I wanted things to turn out. It was all a mess.

‘I thought you of all people would understand,' said Andy, looking down at the pavement.

‘What's that supposed to mean?' I replied.

‘Nina told me about you and Donna. Nina said that reading between the lines Donna seemed to think that you might have fallen in love with her.'

I tried to hold back all of the feelings brought to the surface just by hearing Donna's name. ‘Recently dumped guy falls in love with girl on holiday,' I replied sarcastically. ‘Has all the hallmarks of a relationship that – even if she hadn't dumped me at the airport – would've lasted . . . what? Five . . . maybe . . . six seconds after we'd got back home and she'd realised that I'm not the bloke she thought I was, just a dull bloke with a dull job . . . and a dull flat . . . still licking his wounds following a savaging by his ex-girlfriend.' I paused and looked at Andy. ‘So what was your point?'

‘My point was . . .' his voice trailed off. ‘Look you know what I'm like. I'm hardly perfect boyfriend material, am I? Lisa deserves someone better than me.'

‘And Nina doesn't?'

‘It'll be different.'

‘How?' I replied. ‘What makes you so sure you won't do the same with her too?'

‘Because that's the whole point of starting again,' said Andy, ‘to give yourself a clean slate in the hope that maybe this time around you'll get it right.'

I could see from his face that his mind was made up, so we made our way into the mini-market in silence, bought all the things we were after and then left the shop. On our way back to the beach neither of us mentioned Nina or Lisa again. Instead we talked about recent films we had seen, TV we had watched and famous women we found attractive. And that small host of conversations managed to occupy the void between us right up until we got back to the beach. I retreated to my corner and Andy retreated to his and even though neither of us spoke again we both knew that the conversation was far from over.

Lisa was holding Andy's arm aloft so that she could look at his watch. ‘Time to go, boys,' she said disappointedly.

‘What time is it?' asked Tom.

‘Just coming up to five.'

‘So that's the end of beach life for us for a while,' said Andy. ‘I was actually kind of getting into it.'

‘We could still come down tomorrow,' said Lisa. ‘What time are we supposed to be out of our rooms?'

‘Eleven,' said Andy.

‘Midday,' I corrected.

Andy shrugged. ‘Either way we'll have nowhere to wash once we've been kicked out so I doubt if I'll be bothering with the beach tomorrow.'

‘That's a shame,' said Lisa. ‘So what time's the actual flight home?'

‘Eleven o'clock at night,' said Andy.

‘Actually it's just after midnight,' I corrected again. ‘And the coach picking us up for the airport is coming some time around nine.'

As Andy and Lisa began collecting their things together, it became clear that the tension between me and Andy hadn't gone unnoticed because Tom lifted up his sunglasses and raised his eyebrows in querying fashion. Andy and Lisa were still too close for comfort for me to respond so as they began making their way towards the top of the beach I lingered by the loungers with Tom.

‘So what's happened now? You've barely said a civil word to each other since your trip to the shops.'

‘I don't even know where to begin,' I replied. ‘It's all wrapped up so tightly together it's almost impossible to unravel. I'm not even sure where the beginning of the story is . . . but I'm pretty certain what the end will be if Andy finds out.'

‘This doesn't sound good at all. What has he done now?'

‘It's actually all my fault this time,' I replied. ‘I slept with Lisa.'

‘You
what
?'

‘I know,' I replied. ‘I shouldn't have done it but I did.'

‘When did this happen?'

‘Last night, after you went to bed. Andy went out to get some more raki and I don't know . . . we started talking and it all snowballed from there.' Tom couldn't have looked more disappointed in me if he'd tried. ‘I promise you, if I'd thought for a second that Andy even remotely cared for her I would never have let it happen.'

‘That's easy to say,' said Tom. He looked up ahead to where Andy and Lisa stood waiting at the top of the beach. ‘I take it he doesn't know?'

‘No,' I replied.

‘So why all the tension this afternoon?'

‘Well that sort of brings me to the twist in the story . . .'

‘Nothing you say could surprise me now.'

‘Not even if I told you that not only is Andy going to carry on seeing Nina when we get back home, but he's decided that he's going to leave Lisa?'

‘This whole holiday is a mess from beginning to end. We would've all been better off staying at home.' Tom bent down and picked up his bag. ‘So where does all this leave you and Lisa?'

‘I don't know,' I replied. ‘We haven't had a chance to talk yet.'

‘And if you had, what would you say?'

‘I don't know,' I replied. ‘I really don't know.'

It was evening now and the four of us were making ready to leave The Bengal Castle (one of the few Indian restaurants in Malia and yet another one of Tom's discoveries). Our next stop was the strip, where we planned to visit a few bars before heading off to Andy's beloved foam party at the Camelot Club.

So far the evening had been uneventful. Andy and I had barely spoken to each other until we all sat down to dinner, when we both mellowed significantly for the sake of the evening that lay ahead of us. As for Lisa, I was still none the wiser about her feelings about last night. She hadn't said a single thing to me and there hadn't been the opportunity for me to say a single thing to her. Instead, while the others hung around the bedroom watching TV, I sat on the balcony alone under the guise of reading
The Da Vinci Code
when in reality all I was doing was staring out to sea and thinking about Lisa.

‘So come on then, Charlie,' said Tom as he pushed his chair underneath the table and leaned on the backrest, ‘what do you think will be the first thing you'll do once you get home?'

‘I don't know.' I hadn't been particularly talkative all evening. I glanced at Lisa. ‘Maybe you should ask someone else.'

Tom turned to Lisa and smiled. ‘You'll give me an answer won't you, mate?'

‘Okay,' replied Lisa. ‘The first thing I'll do is open the post. I love it when you go away and there's a ton of stuff waiting for you. It's almost like it's your birthday . . . only there aren't any cards . . . only junk mail and utility bills and letters from your auntie telling you how well all your cousins are doing.' Lisa batted the question back to Tom. ‘What about you? What will be the first thing you do when you get home?'

‘It's a bit boring,' replied Tom. ‘I'll kiss Anne and the kids. That's the first thing I always do when I walk through the door.'

‘That's not boring,' said Lisa. ‘It's sweet. I'd love to come home to a family like that one day.'

‘Ask him what the second thing is,' said Andy. ‘I bet it won't be quite so cuddly.'

‘He's right,' laughed Tom. ‘The second thing will be to check all my work e-mails in case there's anything important in there. Last time Anne and I went away I came back to an in-box groaning under the cyber-weight of two hundred-and-sixty-seven unopened e-mails and attachments. Ninety per cent of them were the usual: “It's Brian's leaving do on Friday – please make the effort to come along.”'

‘That sounds like my place too,' replied Lisa.

‘What about you, Andy?' asked Tom. ‘What will be your first move when you get home?'

‘I can answer that one for you,' said Lisa. ‘It's easy. The first thing Andy always does is go around the house checking every single room to see if anything's changed. It's a weird sort of superstition he's had going for as long as we've been living together.'

‘She's making this up,' said Andy, clearly embarrassed, ‘I don't do that at all.'

‘He does,' teased Lisa. ‘He even does it in the same order every time. It's living room, kitchen, front bedroom, back bedroom and then bathroom. It's like he's checking for burglars or something.'