With the Father (19 page)

I tried to busy
myself around the house while I waited for his response. I started a load of
laundry and wiped down the kitchen counters. I opened the pantry to put away a
box of crackers that had been left out and realized that we were living in
complete disarray, and I hadn’t even noticed or cared. I shuffled the cans of
vegetables around until they were in alphabetical order and then moved on to
the dry goods.

Grace was back.

I felt the last
little piece of my former self, or possibly a better version of it, fall into
place as I moved the saltines to the right of a bag of rice. As I stepped back
to survey my work, I realized that what was missing in my life was probably the
same reason that Paul hadn’t responded to my text.
 

I glanced at the
wall clock as I grabbed my purse from the counter. I still had time.

GRACE

When I walked into the kitchen, three sets of wide eyes stared at
me.
 

“Hey, look who’s
here!” Arden was working the dishwasher and waved a gloved hand at me. It was
getting late now, and the crowd in the dining area had dwindled to just a few.

“You are such a
sight for sore eyes,” Theresa Lions said, dropping the towel she was using to
dry pots and pans. Theresa had been my mom’s closest friend
and
 
had
been volunteering in the
kitchen for longer than I had. Why she wasn’t running the place was beyond me.

She wrapped her
familiar arms around me, and I hugged her back in full force. Stepping back,
she looked me over. “You look good. We’ve missed you around here. Any chance
you’re coming back?”

I looked through
the window over the food line at the families making their way to the door, and
the familiarity of the entire scene comforted me. I’d missed this place more
than I realized. “I think so.”

“Good,” she said,
pulling me in for another hug. Theresa was a hugger. “We need you. If it
weren’t for Paul, the whole place probably would have come crashing down on our
heads.”

“Is he here?” I
asked, looking around for him.

“Has anyone seen
Paul?” she asked the room.

“I believe he’s
walking Abby Thompson to her car,” Judith
Cryer
,
another of our other usual volunteers, answered.

Theresa leaned in
and whispered, “Ever since your incident, he walks all of the ladies to their
cars if they’re alone.”

“Have we had more
problems?” Paul hadn’t said anything to me but he really hadn’t talked about
the kitchen much at all. I now felt horrible about that. I’d walked away from
it all without a thought, leaving my friends to deal with everything without
me. But the kitchen had been my mother’s baby. As soon as I’d walked inside the
building, I’d known I was home. Now I couldn’t believe I’d stayed away for as
long as I had.

“No. It’s been
quiet around here, but you know Paul. He’s not much of a risk taker.”

If
she only knew.

“Grace,” the
aforementioned risk taker said from the back door.

I turned to face
him. “Hi.”

“Did you need me?”
he asked.

It was a loaded question.
I’d come because I wanted to see how things were at the kitchen. However,
staring into those gold-flecked emerald eyes, I knew that I also had come
because I
needed
to see him. “I just came to say hi. To see if I could
come back,” I said, telling a half-truth.

 
“Of course, you can come back.” He spread
his arms wide.
 
“This place is
yours.”

“Well, I, for one,
need to get going,” Arden interjected. “I need to be home before the kids go to
bed.” Her words stung. I knew she hadn’t meant anything by it. That was her
life, and this was mine. She hadn’t intended to point out that I no longer had
anyone to tuck in at night. This was exactly the thing that I had to learn to
get past. I couldn’t expect people to weigh every thing they said on a ‘how
much will it upset Grace scale’ before speaking. Still, it hurt.

“Shoo, you!”
Theresa said slapping Arden on the arm.
Her slap a little too
hard to be considered playful.
“Get on then.”

Arden’s lips drew
into a thin line. She pulled me in for a hug, but it had none of the warmth of
Theresa’s. “I’m looking forward to tomorrow night.” She spoke in a hushed
whisper next to my ear. She meant for only me to hear. “There are some nasty
rumors going around that we should probably talk about.” She waggled her
eyebrows playfully at me, but there was nothing playful in the hard glint in
her eyes.

My stomach twisted
into knots as I realized that she was talking about Paul. Parading around San
Antonio as if we didn’t have a care in the world had been a mistake. It would
only take one person from
Merriville
to start an
avalanche of trouble for Paul. I would spend the next twenty-four hours
worrying about it and trying to think of a way to diffuse the situation.

She pulled away
from me. “I’m so glad you’re back, Grace.” Her voice was sugary-sweet now.
“I’ll see you tomorrow night. Miguel’s, right?”

I nodded, unable to
speak.

“We’re
all
so glad you’re back,” Theresa jumped in, energetically.

“I’m just sorry I
didn’t get here before you guys were done tonight. I was organizing my dad’s
pantry and had something of an epiphany.”

“Were you
alphabetizing?” Arden asked snidely, moving toward the door even as she spoke.
She’d never acted this catty to me before. However, she’d always had a bit of a
crush on Paul. If she’d heard rumors about us, I could see her being jealous.

“Yeah, I was,” I
admitted. “I was moving cans of vegetables around when I realized that it was
one of the most normal things I’d done in months. I decided then that I was
ready to come back.”

“Alphabetizing your
pantry is not normal,” she said, snorting.
 

I tore my eyes away
from Arden, “For me, it is. My cans have been alphabetically challenged for the
past five months, and I didn’t even notice it. Today, I noticed and decided it
was time to put my cans in order.”
And my life.

“There’s nothing
wrong with organization, love,” Theresa said, following Arden toward the door.
Judith was right behind her. “We’ll see you next week then?”

“Definitely,” I
said.

“I’m going to walk
them out.” Paul said, raising his eyebrows in question. “And then we can lock
up together.”

Alone in the
kitchen, I moved around the room. Everything was already in place. All of the
pots and pans were clean and gleaming in the drying rack. The leftover food had
either been stored or handed out to the families. I ran my hand across the
stainless steel counter, thankful that my mom had left this for me. I could
find peace here. I could make a difference here. There would still be times
when I wouldn’t know what to do with my own life, but it was time that I get
back to the business of helping others improve theirs.

“Everything okay?”

I turned to find
Paul, leaning against the doorframe. His arms were crossed over his chest.
A faint smile on his lips.
He was so handsome, but that
wasn’t even what drew to me him. He was a force, a living breathing force. I
couldn’t resist him. I didn’t want to any more.

As soon as those
thoughts danced through my head, I felt guilty for them. Arden knew. Tomorrow
she would confront me with her suspicions, and I would either have to admit
everything or lie. It went against how I felt. It went against how I lived my
life. But, for Paul, I would lie.

I knew I should
tell him. After all, it was his reputation – and life – on the
line, but I couldn’t bear to do it yet. If there was a chance – however
slim – that I was blowing things out of proportion, if it was possible
that Arden knew nothing concrete, I didn’t want to worry him.

I made a promise to
myself. If Arden confronted me tomorrow night, I would go immediately to Paul
and tell him. Then we would figure out some way to do damage control.

However, I’d come
to find him tonight because I’d wanted to see him. And now, I wanted one more
night with him. One more night before everything possibly blew up in our
faces.
 

“Everything’s fine.
I was just thinking about my mom.”

“She was a
wonderful lady.” He moved across the room until he was standing in front of me.
He placed his hand under my chin and tipped it up so that I had no choice but
to look into his eyes. “But you are, too. Come back. You’ll find yourself
again.”

His head tipped to
the side, and his gaze traveled to my lips. He was thinking about kissing me,
and I wanted him, too. “Not here,” I said in spite of myself. The chance that
one of the ladies might make
a reappearance
was too
great.

“Then where?” His
voice was low and thick and different than I’d ever heard it. We were wandering
into new territory now. The desire between us was becoming more intense every
time I saw him. I knew I should go home and send him home too, but that wasn’t
what I’d come here to do. If we only had one night left, I wasn’t going to
waste it.

“Nobody’s at my
house. I was thinking you could sneak over, and we could watch a movie.”

“A movie?” There
was a wicked gleam in his eye that I wasn’t used to seeing there.

“Yes, a movie. I
have the perfect one in mind.”

“Sounds like you
have it all figured out.”

If only.

_________________________

At my insistence, Paul parked around the corner. He hadn’t shared my
concerns and had wanted simply pull to into the driveway. However, when I
insisted he not call any more attention to us, he hadn’t put up a fight.
Keeping him further in the dark, I didn’t tell him what the movie was, wanting
to surprise him instead.

We began the movie with a big bowl of popcorn on the coffee table and
the great expanse of the couch between us.

Other than the night before, I’d been the one to make every move. I’d
perpetrated the attack in the vet’s office. I’d fallen into his arms in the
cemetery. I’d been the one to kiss him after discovering the water truck. The
only time that Paul had been the one to initiate anything between us had been
when we were safely – or so we thought – miles away from
Merriville
.

I wanted to curl up next to him on the couch. I wanted to nestle under
his arm and feel the heat of his body next to me. But, with Arden’s words still
ringing in my ear, I wanted Paul to be the one to bridge the gap between us.

I wanted him to want me, too – not just when we were far away
from the prying eyes of our small town – but here in the thick of it.

As the movie began, Paul chuckled at the selection. “Did you do this
for me?” I nodded. “That’s amazing, Grace,” he said, scooting down beside me.

I wrung my hands in my lap, suddenly feeling foolish for hunting down
and purchasing a movie that he’d mentioned during casual conversation. However,
when he slid his arm around me and pulled me against him just like I’d wanted
him to, I pushed my insecurities aside and melted into him.

“That’s you,” he said, kissing the top of my head. “My Amazing Grace.”

During the movie, I was acutely aware of his presence next to me. His
thumb brushed a rhythm on my shoulder matching the staccato of my heart. When
his knee bumped mine, my breathing hitched – two layers of jeans not
enough to dilute the power of his touch. Every contact caused the spark of
electricity between us to grow.

“Well, that didn’t end the way I hoped it would,” he said as the
credits began to roll.

“I know - ” I pulled away from him and turned on the couch to face him.
I blinked at him with wide, surprised eyes. “Wait - the way you hoped? You’ve
never seen the ending?”

He chuckled. “Nope. I’d never seen the beginning either.”

“But you said it was one of your favorite movies.”

I must have looked stricken. “I’m sorry, Grace,” he said sincerely. He
wrapped both arms around me and pulled me close to him again. “I thought you
knew I was joking. I was trying to be funny. I guess I need to work on my funny
factor.”

I shook my head. “I should’ve known. It really wasn’t very good.”

 
“Oh, it was okay. It was
funny. I probably have an appreciation for it that most men wouldn’t, but it’s
definitely not going to make it onto my favorites list.” He pulled back a little
and rested his hands on my shoulders. His green eyes sparkled mischievously. “I
mean, how could it? The priest didn’t get the girl. He lost her to the
unappreciative rabbi.”

“I took issue with that as well,” I said, watching his mouth. Wanting
it on mine.

“I’m probably biased, but I wanted the priest to get the girl,” he
said, equally mesmerized with mine.

“I don’t think that’s how it works in real life.” Not wanting either
one of us to think about real life at the moment, my voice was muted.

“
Hmmmm
,” he said, not giving me any insight
at all into what was going on in that brain of his. He looked at me for a few
long seconds, his eyes searching mine. “Come here, Amazing Grace.”
 

He tipped up my chin until his lips hovered just over mine. When they finally
came together, squelching the ache that had been growing inside of me
,
 
there
was no
question as to what I was thinking.

I wanted the priest to get the girl.

I didn’t see how it could possibly work out, but I wanted this priest
to get this girl.