Within a Captain's Treasure (13 page)

“And you survived the crew of the
Delmar
?”

“I lied, vomited, kicked. I shot one, stabbed another. Had you not shown up when you did, my
precious
virtue wouldn’t have lasted another hour.”

“What happens when you begin life in Virginia? When a man wants you for his wife?”

Alice gave a bitter laugh. “I have no such illusions. If, by chance, there was a man who wanted to wed me, hearing my story he’d assume as you did. But the fact I killed my attackers would no doubt disturb him far more than the absence of my maidenhood.” She went back to staring out the windows. “I can’t see what difference it makes to you. I won’t demand you marry me if that’s what you fear.” Alice turned to face him. She met his gaze. “Last night…was nothing.” The lie turned to dust on her tongue. “Another lapse in judgment.”

His head jerked back as her words struck. It should have made her feel victorious to give back some of the hurt he’d given her last night, but it didn’t. It only hurt her more. Made her hollow inside. When had she become so hard? Where had she learned how to wield her tongue with the same force as her sword? She was beginning to hate the woman she had become.

Gavin pulled a bottle of brandy from his desk and poured himself a drink. Tossing it back, he grimaced at the bite of the liquor and leveled a dark glare at her.

“Was it yet another lapse in judgment when you decided to climb the mainsail in a full gale?” He took another drink and waved the glass at her. “I see you found your boots. Do you recall how you lost them? Or how you ended up in my bed?”

“No, I—”

“After your stunt—”

“Stunt?”

“You notched that damn chin of yours, glared at Jessup and proceeded to faint at the top of the ladder way. I caught you about the waist and carried you. No one knows you didn’t walk down those stairs on your own.”

Alice twisted at her ring. “Then I should thank you for saving more than my neck. All I’d gained in climbing the rigging would have been lost had they seen me collapse.”

Gavin slammed down his glass. “Gained? Are you insane? Whatever possessed you? You could’ve been swept out to sea or thrown to your death.”

“I was ordered,” she shot back.

“By Jessup. I’d be striping his back right now had you not stopped me.”

Alice threw up her hands. “I couldn’t refuse. No other member of your crew would have been given that option.”

The muscle in his jaw pulsed. “It’s not the same thing, and you know it.”

“Jessup has hated me since I arrived. He has no loyalty to Captain Steele. He doesn’t care who I am. I’m a cursed woman aboard this ship. I silenced him and put an end to it. I’ll continue to do whatever necessary to survive until I can reach Virginia.” Alice understood his anger, but she was alone in this. She’d fought Wolfsan alone. Boarded the
Pennington
alone. The decisions were hers, as well as the consequences. Stopping Jessup’s reign of abuses had been her battle, not Gavin’s.

“Everything I did last night was to secure my place on this ship.”

Gavin’s head snapped up. “Does that include warming my bed?”

Alice was unprepared for the blow mere words could inflict. “You twisted my words.” Past the pain, a deep sadness engulfed her and threatened to drown her. Any hope she had clung to regarding his caring for her were dashed. She swung back. “If you’ll recall,
Captain,
you were the one to carry me to your bed.”

Gavin poured another drink and spoke into the glass. “You could have stopped me.”

Alice closed her eyes to keep him from seeing her pain. “Could I?”

“You just finished telling me how you stopped men in the past who were much more intent upon having you than I.”

Ice encased the shattered remains of her heart as she forced herself to lift her chin and look him straight in the eye. “Yes, I stopped them, and then I killed them, but none of those bastards was ever vile enough to call me a whore.” Alice crossed to the door. “At least Jessup is honest in his hatred toward me. It seems my imagining about your cock wasn’t the only thing I was wrong about.”

Alice looked down at her chest as she made her way back to her post. Was there blood? There should be blood when someone cut out your heart.

Moving though the crowded deck, her vision blurred. Everything slowed as if she were trudging through murky water. She was numb. Looking forward, there was sea as far as the horizon and beyond. There was nothing left to do but pray the winds held and the voyage to the new world was swift. Short of throwing herself overboard, Alice’s only hope now was to survive the next few weeks and be rid of this ship and
all
who sailed upon her. She would keep to herself, work herself into exhaustion so she could sleep at night without the dreams of what would never be, and stay clear of the good captain.

She and Annalise had played a game as children. They would become invisible. Keeping out of sight and anticipating each other’s moves, they stayed one step ahead of each other. Stealth was a honed gift, and she planned to use it to lose herself within this ship. It had helped when she tracked Wolfsan into Port Royal and ended him. Evading Gavin couldn’t be any more difficult.

And for the next several days, it was child’s play. Gavin came looking for her in the armory. Alice ducked behind a stack of crates.

“Where’s Tupper?”

MacTavish shifted. “Over there... She just be there talkin’ te me. Must ’ave slipped by.”

From her vantage point she could see Gavin’s frustration. He scanned the armory. Twice. “She came this way. I’ve been trying to track her down for days.”

“Been here ’ard at work. Quiet mostly. Does what’s asked of ’er.” MacTavish stopped what he was working on and wiped his hands on his kilt. “What ya be needin’?”

Gavin rubbed at his eyes. “Nothing. Forget it.”

“Then why ye lookin’ fer her?” MacTavish’s broad back blocked Alice from seeing his expression, but she knew the tone in his voice and could imagine the narrow-eyed glare he was famous for using.

Gavin growled and turned to leave. “I’m seeing things. Carry on.”

Alice waited until Gavin closed the door and returned to her workspace. “I’ve finished trimming the wicks and filling the smoke pots. Aren’t we casting shot today?”

MacTavish leapt from his stool. “Lassie. Scared te crap out te me. Capt’n lookin’ fer ye.”

Alice bit back the laugh. “Oh, sorry.”

“Were ye here te whole time?” The Scotsman rubbed at his eyes. “I’m losin’ me grip.”

Alice patted his muscled arm. “You’re fine. Should I start melting the lead?” She bit the inside of her cheek to keep from smiling. The ever-sharp MacTavish didn’t miss anything.

He narrowed his eyes at her and planted his meaty fists on his hips. “What game ye be playin’ at, lass?”

“Don’t know what you’re talking about.” Alice crossed her arms over her chest and studied the toes of his worn boots.

“I ken smell it. Ye be up to somethin’.”

She lifted one shoulder. “I’m doing my chores and keeping myself from trouble.”

“Well, none ken fault ye fer that.” He got almost nose to nose with her and stared her down. “But I smell somethin’ rotten.”

Alice blinked at him. “When was the last time you washed your kilt?”

* * * *

While Alice chose to evade Gavin’s notice, over the last days, she gained a small shadow. One who was becoming dearer to her by the day. Bump had no trouble finding her wherever she may be. He wouldn’t venture into the armory, but she had come to expect he’d be waiting for her at the end of her day. Sometimes she would find him curled up in front of her door. Other times she would be crossing the decks, and he would simply appear at her side. They shared their evening meal together. It was Alice’s favorite time of day. They started off sitting in silence, but soon Alice took to telling him stories of her and Annalise’s adventures when they were his age. He didn’t hear a word, but it didn’t matter. He would watch her and on rare occasions treat her to a tiny glimpse of a smile.

The night of the storm when she found him hiding under her cot, he had crawled into her lap, but that had been the only physical connection she’d made with the boy short of the occasional ruffle of his hair or a pat on his back. He was careful to never get closer than arm’s length. His unreasonable panic at being hugged had her worried. What must his short life have been like to incite such a response?

This night, however, he wasn’t waiting in his usual spot. Alice slipped into the galley and gathered bread and ale. Still she didn’t see the boy. Tonight, she guessed, she’d be dining alone.

Moving into the dim below decks, she spotted him in a dark corner. His eyes were round with fear.

“There you are.” It was then she noticed the hand gripping the boy’s shoulder, and the knife against the boy’s chest. Jessup stepped out of the shadows. Alice’s blood chilled. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“Hard to decide which of ye needs cuttin’ worse.” He jerked Bump back against him and tightened his hold.

Cold fury flashed behind her eyes. “Let him go.”

Jessup shook his head and pressed the blade against Bump’s throat. “Done enough listenin’ to ye. Ye made me the fool fer the last time. Now ye be listenin’ te me.”

Alice’s hands were busy holding bread and ale. If she dropped them to draw her pistol, Bump would be dead before she could cock the hammer.

“Sick of hearin’ about the
great
Tupper. Ye’re nothin’ but a fukin’ slut. Makin’ everyone think yer better ’an me.” His voice was low and menacing. “Think I don’t ken what yer doin’?”

She tried to talk him down while keeping a close watch on his knife hand. If he so much as drew a drop of that child’s blood… “I’m not doing anything. I swear. Let Bump go.”

Jessup went on as if she hadn’t spoken. “Stood there, all high and mighty. Takin’ me balls wit ya when ye strutted away like some common whore. Got the crew laughin.’ They all be laughin.’”

Alice inched forward. “I want nothing to do with your balls. They wanted to flog you.”

“Ye think I ain’t had me back striped afore?” he spit before jerking Bump back against him again, adjusting his hold.

Each move he made caused her gut to twist. Jessup wasn’t going to listen to any explanation. “Hurt the child and they’ll do more than that.”

He laughed. “Din ya hear? Lad slipped o’er the rail. Lost ’im we did. Couldn’t even yell fer help.”

Fear crept under her skin. If she could get him to loosen his hold on Bump, she could blind him with her ale.

“Then it be yer turn. I’m gonna split ye from stem te stern and feed yer heart to the sharks.”

“Going to claim I slipped over the rail as well?”

“Tupper’s disappeared?” He laughed. “Don’t know nothin’ about it.” Jessup jerked his chin at her. “I been watchin.’ Ye’ve been disappearin’ all week. Think yer smart. Leadin’ the capt’n around by his cock. He’ll thank me.”

A group of three boisterous seamen came down the ladder way. Jessup cursed under his breath and pushed Bump at her. He sneared into her face. “Don’t be countin’ on seein’ many more days. Talk ’n ye’ll not live long enough te take yer next piss. It be a mighty small ship, an’ I ken all the hidin’ places. Ne’er see me comin.’”

He gave her a sharp shove. Bump took off like cannon shot.

Alice bided her time. There was no chance she would let Jessup’s threat against her and Bump go unreported. Quinn had to know. Not for her sake, but for the boy’s. She could defend herself, but Bump was helpless against Jessup’s plot. He couldn’t even cry out. The thought froze the blood in her veins.

Jessup was on third watch. It was her chance to slip into Gavin’s quarters and wait for him to return. Entering, Alice’s breath caught. His quarters were in total disarray. Clothes littered the floor, the once-clear desk lay cluttered with parchments, maps, and discarded food. The bed barely looked slept in.

What was happening? She sat behind his desk and tried to make sense of what she was seeing. She’d never known Gavin to drink anything stronger than weak ale, but the scattering of empty bottles told another tale.

A tumbled stack of yellowed letters caught her eye. Beautifully scrolled writing upon the face of the envelope captured her attention. Pale, faded brown ink read,
“My Darling, Gavin.”
A deep hollowness filled her belly.

Alice lifted one of the letters, turning it over in her hand, noting the wear. With gentle care, she opened it.

Dearest Gavin,

I miss you desperately, my love, my husband. It has not been a day since you left my arms and I wonder how I will bear the long months without you. I will keep the thought of our last few blissful days within my heart. Never have known such joy and passion, my darling. I’m counting the days until we can be together again. I love you with all of my heart and soul,

Your faithful wife, Beth

A wife. Counting the days until his return. Alice’s stomach twisted. Her eyes shot to the door, but fear at being caught could not stop her from reading the next letter.

Like the first, the pages were faded and worn and filled with love and longing. Beth was busy making their house a proper home for him. Another letter contained within the beautiful faded writing the sheer joy and excitement with which she announced she was carrying their child.

Alice dropped the letter to the desk as if the words struck her. She covered her eyes. A wife and a child. She had seduced another woman’s husband. Why hadn’t he told her?

The question needn’t be asked. The answer was clear. Like the issue of her virginity, there was no discussion before they fell into bed in a blind rush of lust. No regard for either’s circumstances. They were strangers driven together by their own careless desires.

Curiosity kept her reading. Beth’s touching words spoke of her growing excitement over the babe, as well as her growing waist. Her father had built a beautiful oak cradle with tiny ships carved into the wood waiting by the hearth for the baby’s arrival. Just as she would be waiting for Gavin to come home to them. Beth hoped the baby would have Gavin’s fair hair. If it was a boy, she hoped he would be tall and handsome like his father.