Wolfbreed (34 page)

Interlude

t was a bright summer day, and a nine-year-old child named Lilly sat in the woods to the east of the pagan village of Mej dân.

True to her master, she waited.

She waited, anticipating the moment when she would be able to go into the city and punish the evil people who so troubled her master and his God. She would do well, and she would show him how all the pain and discipline was worth it. She would demonstrate that she was worthy of him, and of his God.

But first, she had to wait.

She sat on a black, moss-covered log. Occasionally she would rock her legs back and idly kick it with her heel, denting the rotten wood and scattering strange little crawling things to scurry across her legs. Sometimes she sang the lullaby she had used to sing to Rose.

Sometimes she wished her new master would sing to her.

However, even if he didn’t, she knew that she was special to him simply because he took no pleasure in correcting her.

Unlike her first master who enjoyed punishing any error until the prospect of pain was an overwhelming shadow over every step she took, her new master only beat her when she did something truly wrong. More important, beating was
all
he did. He didn’t use anything to cut her, or insert into her body. Compared to rape and mutilation, a heavy rod across her back was almost a pleasure.

And, because of that mercy, she would do anything. She would take the life of every person in this village if it would please him.

But first, she waited.

Dappled sunlight spread across the woods around her, and a gentle breeze rustled the leaves, tugging at the simple tunic her master had given her. Occasionally she would run her hands over the fabric. She was still unused to being allowed to wear real human clothing. If she did well, maybe her master would allow her to keep it.

Around her, insects and birds chirped, and the air was rich with smells. She could smell mud and loam, as well as horses and people from the village. And she loved the smell of the pine trees around her. Even the rotting log she sat on smelled rich and earthy—an improvement over the smells of blood, urine, straw, and stone she was used to from her life before her new master.

“Hello?”

Her eyes widened, and she spun around.

No
, she was supposed to be hiding and waiting. No one was supposed to see her. If someone found her, she would fail. Her master would have to beat her or, worse, he might return her to the monastery.

She expected a huge hairy man in armor, like the pagans they made her train on. The man would draw his sword, and Lilly would have to kill him, spoiling her master’s order not to kill anyone until it was time …

But it wasn’t a hairy pagan swordsman.

It was a child, no more than a year older than she was. He stood
only a few paces away, smiling. The boy was taller than her, and held a sack slung over his shoulder. He waved at her with his free hand. “Hello,” he said again.

She was on her feet and backing away from him. She wasn’t supposed to be seen by the village, but she wasn’t supposed to kill anyone, either. Maybe she should just run away.

“My name’s Uldolf. What’s yours?”

“Lilly,” she said reflexively. She couldn’t help it. You answered a direct question or you were beaten …

She shouldn’t be talking to this boy.

“Was that you I heard singing, last night?”

Please, no!
It was her fault. Master would abandon her for sure.

“I—I don’t know what you mean.”

But lying was even worse. Even as she spoke the words, she could feel her old master twisting her arm until it snapped and forcing himself between her legs—

“Come on,” he said. “Admit it.”

“I shouldn’t be talking to you.”

“Why not?”

“I’m waiting …” Lilly trailed off, not knowing what to say. She couldn’t tell him the truth. That would be worse than all her other mistakes combined.

But the boy, Uldolf, just shrugged and said, “Are you hungry?”

Lilly stopped worrying long enough to be completely confused. “What?”

“Are you hungry?” Uldolf asked again. He walked up to the log and set his pack down. “I have some cheese.”

She didn’t know what to do. She folded her arms and shook her head. “I shouldn’t be talking to you.”

Uldolf laughed. “That’s fine, I shouldn’t be talking to you, either. I’m supposed to be with the other kids, keeping the cows in the meadow.”

“Cows?”

“Stupid things would walk off a cliff if someone wasn’t there to shoo them away.” Uldolf unwrapped his bundle revealing two things inside, neither of which was familiar to Lilly. One was a lumpy whitish-yellow object, whose edges crumbled like dry earth. The other was rough, round, and mostly brown. Neither object looked particularly interesting.

But the smell …

She sucked in deep breaths just to have more of it. The smell was sharp and warm and unlike anything she had ever smelled before. She licked her lips and closed her eyes, trying to breathe in every particle.

“So, you want some?”

Lilly’s eyes snapped open. She suddenly remembered that she wasn’t supposed to be talking to anyone.

The boy was alone; maybe she should kill him? The boy had sneaked away. He had said so. No one knew he was here. She could hide the body somewhere they would not find him, at least not before her master brought the army of Christ to this city.

She could kill him right now …

He held up a broken part of the white-yellow thing to her and she realized that part of that wonderful smell was coming from it.

Lilly didn’t understand for a moment.

“Go on, take it. You look hungry.”

His words cut through the confusion. She reached out and took the crumbling thing. The texture was something like rotten clay—slightly sticky, maybe a little oily. She couldn’t believe that anyone might just give her something that smelled so wonderful.

She held it to her face so she could breathe it in. She enjoyed it for several moments when she realized the boy, Uldolf, was frowning at her. She lowered her hand and looked around. Was someone else here?

“Are you stupid?” the boy asked.

She didn’t understand. Why would he give her such a wonderful thing, and then say she was stupid?

The other part of her whispered,
Kill him. Let us kill him now
.

“W-why would you say that?”

He frowned. “You’re playing some sort of trick on me, aren’t you?”

“N-no. I’m not. Please, tell me why you’re saying that.”

She was feeling weak, uncertain, in a way that she hadn’t felt in a long time. Not since before the time she understood what her masters wanted from her. For years now, the one thing she was sure of was that she knew the rules. She knew which actions brought pain, and which did not.

You will not feel this way if he dies …

“Stop it!” she snapped at herself.

“Stop what?” Uldolf said.

Lilly could feel tears welling up in the corners of her eyes, and that made her feel worse. Her master did not like it when she cried. It was weak. It brought more beatings. She looked at the thing in her hand and made a fist around it.

“Why did you give this to me?” she shouted, and threw the thing back at Uldolf in frustration. It hit him in the middle of his chest, breaking apart into a shower of crumbled fragments.

His eyes were wide, and his face mirrored the confusion Lilly felt. She turned away so he couldn’t see her crying.

“I’m sorry,” he said.

Lilly sucked in a breath, unsure if she had heard the words correctly. She wiped her eyes. “What did you say?”

“I’m sorry I called you stupid.”

Who was this boy? Lilly was the one who said sorry. She was the one who asked forgiveness. No one ever apologized to her. She shook her head. “I
am
stupid.” If she wasn’t stupid, she would be able to figure out what to do now.

“No, I was being mean.”

She felt his hand on her shoulder and shuddered.

Change now, sink our teeth into his neck. Tear his stupid head from his stupid body
.

She turned around, and Uldolf held up another piece of the wonderful-smelling cube. “Here, you can have my half.”

He shoved it into her hand before she could reach out and take it. She looked down at it. Nothing made sense to her. She had just thrown his gift back at him. He should be taking a metal rod and whipping her across the back and legs, at the very least.

“It smells so wonderful,” she whispered.

“It does stink, doesn’t it?”

She blinked so she could focus on the object in her palm. “What is it?”

“Now I know you’re tricking me!”

“No.” She looked up at him. “Please, tell me.”

“You say you don’t know what cheese is?”

Lilly shook her head.

Uldolf frowned. “So what do
you
eat?”

Lilly didn’t know what that had to do with anything, but she didn’t see any harm in answering. “I eat meat.”

Lilly thought of the elk calf that she had killed two nights ago. She’d hung the carcass in a tree, and even after two days it still had a good section of the haunches left. She thought of the red flesh and the rusty smell of the calf’s entrails, and her mouth watered. She
was
hungry. Now she wanted to get rid of Uldolf so she could go back to her kill.

“Only meat? And I bet your father is duke of Mazovia.”

“No,” Lilly said. “I don’t know who my father is.”

“Oh.”

“What else would I eat?”

“Well, cheese, of course.”

She looked at her palm.

“You really haven’t eaten cheese before?”

“No.” She lifted the crumbling object to her lips and took a bite. It melted into her mouth with a flavor unlike anything she had ever tasted. That wonderful smell turned velvet and wrapped her tongue.

How could someone just
give
her this?

“I’d better go,” he said.

Her eyes snapped open. “What? You just got here.”

“Well, it took me a while to find you. They’ll be expecting me home soon. It’s late.”

“Oh.”

“I can come back if you want. You’ll be here?”

“Yes.”
Why did I say that? I’m supposed to stay hidden
. “Please, don’t tell anyone I’m here.”

“No, I don’t want to get into trouble.” He walked back to the log and picked up the other object. “Here, you can have the bread, too.” He tossed it to her. It was all she could do to grab it before it tumbled to the ground. “You know about bread, don’t you?”

“Y-yes,” she lied.

He picked up the cloth that had made up his bundle and waved at her. “Good-bye.”

She watched him disappear into the woods before she bit into the “bread” he had given her. At first she thought it was some sort of trick, but then she realized that it was like a thick bone she had to break to get at the spongy contents. Inside, it was almost as good as the cheese.

illy knew it was wrong, but throughout that night she thought more of the boy Uldolf than she did of her master’s wishes.