You Can't Scare Me! (10 page)

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Authors: R. L. Stine

BOOK: You Can't Scare Me!
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That's because Brandon is a big hulk of a kid. He's about half a foot taller than me. He has broad shoulders and a big chest, straight black hair, and a cold stare that makes him look like he's tough.

I'm short and very thin. I have curly blond hair and blue eyes and freckles on my cheeks. I'm the youngest kid in my class, but I'm three years older than Brandon. And everyone we meet thinks I'm the little brother.

Which is funny because Brandon is a total wimp. So
what
if I look like an elf standing next to a giant?

I'm the tough one in the family. He's scared of bugs and snakes and being in the woods and being in the water. And anything else you can think of.

And once I actually saw him jump away from his own shadow. No kidding. He swore he tripped. But I know the truth.

It's a pain having a younger brother who's bigger than me. And it's an even bigger pain having a huge monster brother who is a total coward.

I love scary movies. But my parents say I have to go to G-rated baby movies with Brandon so he won't get scared. I like to watch scary TV shows, too. And play really cool battle games on my Xbox.

But guess what? I'm not allowed while Brandon is around. We don't want to upset the poor guy — do we?

And now … even worse … he's ruining my first trip to HorrorLand.

He's too scared to do anything. The rides are too scary for him. The games are too noisy and frightening. The Haunted Theater is too
haunted!

He's even afraid of the Horrors. They're the big, furry, green-and-purple park workers. You know. They are guides, and they run the rides and the game booths and work in the shops.

Brandon is almost as big as they are. But he's terrified of them.

So how much fun am I having with him at HorrorLand? Can you spell
zero?

It was a cool, gray day. Wisps of fog hung low over the park. A perfect spooky day to be at HorrorLand.

“Brandon, what if we go on the scariest ride here?” I said. “What if —”

“I don't want to,” he said. His favorite expression. He sticks out his lower lip and gets all pouty and says, “I don't want to.”

“No. Listen to me,” I said. He was staring at a Horror behind a food cart. I grabbed his arm and tried to turn him around. But I wasn't strong enough to budge him.

“What if we both go on the scariest ride ever,” I started again. “And you
like
it? Wouldn't that be great? Wouldn't you think it was cool to find out that you like scary rides, too?”

“But I don't
want
to,” Brandon whined.

I sighed. Mom and Dad let Brandon and me go off on our own this afternoon. And I didn't want to waste it doing baby stuff.

I dragged Brandon up to a tall green Horror wearing bright yellow overalls with yellow suspenders. He wore a button on his cap that read:
I'M A SCREAM!

He grinned at me. “Hey, kiddo — know why I wear yellow suspenders?” he asked.

“Why?” I said.

“To keep my pants up!” He roared with laughter and slapped his knees.

“That's a very bad joke,” I said.

“No, it isn't,” the Horror replied. “It's a SCREAM!” He opened his mouth and screamed at the top of his lungs.

Brandon covered his ears.

The Horror tapped the button on his cap. “Just doing my job,” he said. He coughed. “I get
such
a sore throat from this job! What can I do for you?”

“My brother and I want to do something way scary,” I said. “What's the scariest ride in HorrorLand?”

The Horror rubbed his furry chin. “Have you tried the Doom Slide?”

“Too scary,” Brandon said, doing his pouty face.

“I did it without him,” I said. “It was okay. But not great.”

“How about the A-Nile-Ator coaster?” the Horror asked. “It's the world's only coaster where you ride in a coffin.”

Brandon shivered and shut his eyes. “Not for me,” he whispered.

“It was good. But not really scary enough,” I said.

The Horror stared at me for a long time. He rubbed one of the curled horns on either side of his cap. “Okay, I get it,” he said. “You want something to make you scream like
this.”

 

Even more frights to keep you awake at night! Here's a preview of

RETURN OF THE MUMMY

Another classic Goosebumps adventure
with brand-new bonus material

 

1

“Gabe, we will be landing soon,” the stewardess told me, leaning over the seat. “Will someone be meeting you at the airport?”

“Yes. Probably an ancient Egyptian pharaoh,” I told her. “Or maybe a disgusting, decaying mummy.”

She narrowed her eyes at me. “No. Really,” she insisted. “Who will be meeting you in Cairo?”

“My Uncle Ben,” I replied. “But he likes to play practical jokes. Sometimes he dresses in weird costumes and tries to scare me.”

“You told me that your uncle was a famous scientist,” the stewardess said.

“He is,” I replied. “But he's also weird.”

She laughed. I liked her a lot. She had pretty blond hair. And I liked the way she always tilted her head to one side when she talked.

Her name was Nancy, and she had been very nice to me during the long flight to Egypt. She knew it was my first time flying all by myself.

She kept checking on me and asking me how I was doing. But she treated me like a grown-up. She didn't bring me one of those dumb connect-the-dots books or a plastic wings pin that they always give to kids on planes. And she kept slipping me extra bags of peanuts, even though she wasn't supposed to.

“Why are you visiting your uncle?” Nancy asked. “Just for fun?”

I nodded. “I did it last summer, too,” I told her. “It was really awesome! But this year, Uncle Ben has been digging in an unexplored pyramid. He's discovered an ancient, sacred tomb. And he invited me to be with him when he opens it up.”

She laughed and tilted her head a little more. “You have a good imagination, Gabe,” she said. Then she turned away to answer a man's question.

I
do
have a good imagination. But I wasn't making that up.

My uncle Ben Hassad is a famous archaeologist. He has been digging around in pyramids for lots of years. I've seen newspaper articles about him. And once he was in
National Geographic.

Last summer, my entire family visited Cairo. My cousin Sari and I — she's Uncle Ben's daughter — had some amazing adventures down in the chambers of the Great Pyramid.

Sari will be there this summer, too. I remembered, staring out the plane window at the solid blue sky. I wondered if maybe she would give me a break this time.

I like Sari, but she's so competitive! She always has to be the first, the strongest, the smartest, the best. She's the only thirteen-year-old girl I know who can turn eating breakfast into a contest!

“Flight attendants, prepare for landing,” the pilot announced over the loudspeaker.

I sat up to get a better view out the window. As the plane lowered, I could see the city of Cairo beneath us. A slender blue ribbon curled along the city. That, I knew, was the Nile River.

The city stretched out from the river. Peering straight down, I could see tall glass skyscrapers and low domed temples. Where the city ended, the desert began. Yellow sand stretched to the horizon.

My stomach began to feel a little fluttery. The pyramids were somewhere out in that desert. And in a day or two, I would be climbing down into one of them, following my uncle into a tomb that hadn't been opened for thousands of years.

What would we find?

I pulled the little mummy hand from my shirt pocket and gazed down at it. It was so tiny — no bigger than a child's hand. I had bought it from a kid at a garage sale for two dollars. He said it was called a Summoner. He said it could summon ancient evil spirits.

It looked like a mummy hand. The fingers were wrapped in stained gauze bandages with a little black tar showing through.

I thought it was a fake, made of rubber or plastic. I mean, I never thought it was a real mummy hand.

But last summer, the hand had saved all of our lives. The kid who sold it to me was right. It really did bring a bunch of mummies to life! It was amazing!

GOOSEBUMPS
HORRORLAND
™
ALL-NEW! ALL TERRIFYING!
Also Available from Scholastic Audio Books

#1 REVENGE OF THE LIVING DUMMY
#2 CREEP FROM THE DEEP
#3 MONSTER BLOOD FOR BREAKFAST!
#4 THE SCREAM OF THE HAUNTED MASK
#5 DR. MANIAC VS. ROBBY SCHWARTZ
#6 WHO'S YOUR MUMMY?
#7 MY FRIENDS CALL ME MONSTER
#8 SAY CHEESE — AND DIE SCREAMING!
#9 WELCOME TO CAMP SLITHER
#10 HELP! WE HAVE STRANGE POWERS!
#11 ESCAPE FROM HORRORLAND
#12 THE STREETS OF PANIC PARK
GOOSEBUMPS HORRORLAND BOXED SET #1-4
WELCOME TO HORRORLAND: A SURVIVAL GUIDE
#13 WHEN THE GHOST DOG HOWLS
#14 LITTLE SHOP OF HAMSTERS
#15 HEADS, YOU LOSE!
#16 SPECIAL EDITION: WEIRDO HALLOWEEN
#17 THE WIZARD OF OOZE
#18 SLAPPY NEW YEAR!

RIDE FOR YOUR LIFE!
GOOSEBUMPS
HORRORLAND
™

THE VIDEO GAME
AVAILABLE NOW FROM SCHOLASTIC INTERACTIVE

 

GOOSEBUMPS
®
NOW WITH BONUS FEATURES!

NIGHT OF THE LIVING DUMMY
DEEP TROUBLE
MONSTER BLOOD
THE HAUNTED MASK
ONE DAY AT HORRORLAND
THE CURSE OF THE MUMMY'S TOMB
BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR
SAY CHEESE AND DIE!
THE HORROR AT CAMP JELLYJAM
HOW I GOT MY SHRUNKEN HEAD
THE WEREWOLF OF FEVER SWAMP
A NIGHT IN TERROR TOWER
WELCOME TO DEAD HOUSE
WELCOME TO CAMP NIGHTMARE
GHOST BEACH
THE SCARECROW WALKS AT MIDNIGHT
YOU CAN'T SCARE ME!

GET MORE
GOOSEBUMPS
®
ON DVD!

FROM FOX HOME ENTERTAINMENT

ATTACK OF THE JACK-O'-LANTERNS
THE HEADLESS GHOST
MONSTER BLOOD
A NIGHT IN TERROR TOWER
ONE DAY AT HORRORLAND
RETURN OF THE MUMMY
THE SCARECROW WALKS AT MIDNIGHT

GET
GOOSEBUMPS
PHOTOSHOCK FOR YOUR
iPhone
TM
OR iPod touch
®
!

Copyright

No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without written permission of the publisher. For information regarding permission, write to Scholastic Inc., Attention: Permissions Department, 557 Broadway, New York, NY 10012.

Goosebumps book series created by Parachute Press, Inc.
Copyright © 1994 by Scholastic Inc.
Cover design by Steve Scott
Cover art by Brandon Dorman

All rights reserved. Published by Scholastic Inc.,
Publishers since 1920.
SCHOLASTIC, GOOSEBUMPS, GOOSEBUMPS HORRORLAND, and associated logos are trademarks and/or registered trademarks of Scholastic Inc.

First printing, October 2010

“Behind the Screams” bonus material by Gabrielle S. Balkan

All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of publisher.

e-ISBN: 978-0-545-30070-4

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