Authors: Johanna Edwards
Your Big Break (22 page)
“That was almost worth giving up Koogan for.
Almost
,” he teases.
Almost
,” he teases.
We sit in silence for a few moments. But it's a comfortable, friendly silence, like we're old friends. “So, I was wondering,” Brady says. “would you like to go to a movie with me sometime?”
An Actual Date. He's asking me for an Actual Date! This is definitely against rule #5. Oh, who cares? My life's been stressful lately. I deserve a little fun
. “Love to,” I say, trying to remain calm. Like Sean, I'm not exactly a smooth operator. I guess it runs in the family.
. “Love to,” I say, trying to remain calm. Like Sean, I'm not exactly a smooth operator. I guess it runs in the family.
“I was thinking we could catch a matinee one weekend,” Brady continues.
Looks like I jumped the gun when I declared it an Actual Date. An afternoon matinee definitely classifies as an SOD. And he didn't suggest a specific time.
We finish our drinks and sandwiches, exchange phone numbers, and go our separate ways with a plan to get together again soon. I'm not really sure what the lunch meant, but I enjoyed myself nonetheless. It was nice to take my mind off things for a while.
“Bye, Brady
Koogan
Simms,” I say as he heads out the door.
Koogan
Simms,” I say as he heads out the door.
“Bye, Pumpkin Legs,” he calls, winking at me.
23
I Think We Should Date Other People
I haven't talked to my mother since that fateful night of The Conversation. It's been nearly three weeks. She hasn't called me, and I see no point in calling her. I haven't spoken to my father, either. We were supposed to have a family meal last week, but Thursday passed and no one mentioned it. I guess we're all mutually avoiding one another. I get my news through Sean, who keeps me updated on a regular basis.
Jude took Mom to the movies tonight. Jude brought Mom flowers.
And I hear stuff about Father, too.
Dad was on the phone with Gretchen for an hour last night. Dad didn't come home until 2 a.m. I think he was with Gretchen.
Jude took Mom to the movies tonight. Jude brought Mom flowers.
And I hear stuff about Father, too.
Dad was on the phone with Gretchen for an hour last night. Dad didn't come home until 2 a.m. I think he was with Gretchen.
Krista's been spending virtually every free moment with Jason Dutwiler; I barely see her anymore. Brady Simms has also been MIA. He hasn't called or e-mailed since our semi-date. It's weird, but talking to my brother has now become the highlight of my day. In the past, we were never very close. We always got along, but you couldn't really call us “friends.” Now I view him as a trusted confidant.
“I've got a plan,” Sean says when he phones me at work Tuesday afternoon.
I'm in the middle of writing a breakup letter for Evan Hirschbaum's latest castoff. “I'm all ears.”
“Brace yourself: It involves porn.”
“What?” I exclaim, dropping my pen.
“
Gay
porn, to be specific.”
Gay
porn, to be specific.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“Okay, this is gonna sound nuts, but hear me out before you make your decision.”
“I'm skeptical, but I'm listening.”
“
Mom's
the one who wanted to see other people, right?”
Mom's
the one who wanted to see other people, right?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Dad was merely following
Mom's
orders. He wanted to stay faithful to her, wanted to keep his marriage intact. But he felt he had no choice but to do what she asked. So he turned to Gretchen Monaghan out of desperation, because he couldn't be with the woman he really wanted. This exact same thing happened on
Days of Our Lives
when Bo hooked up with Billie because he thought his true love, Hope, had drowned in a vat of acid.”
Mom's
orders. He wanted to stay faithful to her, wanted to keep his marriage intact. But he felt he had no choice but to do what she asked. So he turned to Gretchen Monaghan out of desperation, because he couldn't be with the woman he really wanted. This exact same thing happened on
Days of Our Lives
when Bo hooked up with Billie because he thought his true love, Hope, had drowned in a vat of acid.”
“I thought you watched
General Hospital,
not
Days of Our Lives
.”
General Hospital,
not
Days of Our Lives
.”
“I kind of watch them both,” he says sheepishly. “Back to what I was saying. Dad's only with Gretchen because he can't have Mom. If Mom dumps Jude and offers to take Dad back, he'll go in a heartbeat!”
I'm not so sure. “He called Gretchen his soul mate.”
“He can't have meant it,” Sean argues. “Judging by their e-mails, Gretchen said it first. It's kind of like when someone says âI love you.' You just
have
to say it back.”
have
to say it back.”
“Mom doesn't want Dad. She wants Jude,” I point out.
“She only
thinks
she wants Jude. All we've got to do is convince her otherwise.”
thinks
she wants Jude. All we've got to do is convince her otherwise.”
“How are we going to do that?”
“We have to convince Mom that Jude is gay. She'll toss him out on his ass.”
I burst out laughing. “Sean, you've lost it. There's no way we can do that.”
“We can,” he insists. “Mom
said
her relationship with Jude doesn't have any passion.”
said
her relationship with Jude doesn't have any passion.”
I frown. “It sounds too far-fetched, too risky.”
“All good plans are risky,” Sean counters. “It'll work.”
I'm still reluctant. Part of me thinks we should just butt out, leave well enough alone.
“Look,” Sean says, “every time Jude's come over here, he's brought his yoga bag. All we have to do is hide some gay porn in it and then make sure Mom finds it. That'll plant enough seeds of doubt to have her running back to Dad's arms.” When I don't say anything, he adds, “Dani, I'm going to do this with or without your help. Though, if you'll remember, we formed a coalition, we agreed to work together to keep our family from falling apart.”
I let out a sigh. “All right, I'll help. Tell me what I need to do.”
Â
Â
A few days pass, and Brady still doesn't call to ask me to a movie. But Sophie Kennison does.
Â
A few days pass, and Brady still doesn't call to ask me to a movie. But Sophie Kennison does.
“I was wondering if you want to rent some DVDs and hang out at my place tonight?” she offers on Friday afternoon. I don't have any plans, so I say yes.
I arrive to find her waiting for me outside her apartment. “I was thinking we could go to your brother's Blockbuster on Comm. Ave.,” she suggests. “They have a really good selection.”
“Sure,” I say. We arrive at the store, and Sophie heads straight for new arrivals.
“I'll catch up with you in a minute,” I say, scouting the store for Sean. I spy him stocking videos by the register and hurry over.
“What are you doing here?” he asks.
“I'm having a movie night with Sophie. We dropped by to get a few flicks.”
“Sophie's here?” His eyes begin scanning the store.
“Yeah, she's picking out some movies. Anyway, update me on what's going on at home?” I ask.
“It's depressing. After that one great talk, now we barely speak to each other. Mom left me a note on the kitchen table this morning.” He reaches into the pocket of his khaki pants and pulls out a wadded-up napkin. “Here, read it for yourself.”
Â
Sâ
Sâ
How about dinner at the house this Tuesday? Me, you, Dani, & Jude. Could be a good bonding opportunity. I'll cook. Ask your sister if she's free.
Mom
Â
“I can't believe she left you a note on a napkin,” I say, as soon as my eyes have finished scanning the message.
“I can't believe she left you a note on a napkin,” I say, as soon as my eyes have finished scanning the message.
“I told you, we don't talk. What do you want to do about this?”
“We should probably go for it. This might be our big chance.”
“I know,” Sean says. “I'll tell her we can be there.” He snorts. “Maybe I'll write an acceptance note on a square of toilet paper.”
I feel badly for him, living in that house of tension. “So, we'll implement Operation Gay Porn this Tuesday, and see where it leads?”
“For my sanity's sake, I hope it works. At the very least, I'd like us to all start talking again. It's too quiet at home.” Sean picks up a few videos and heads to the end counter, away from the line of customers. “I'm so spaced-out, Dani,” he says, setting them down. “These haven't even been checked back in yet, and I was about to restock them.” He shakes his head. “I'm losing my mind.”
I pat him on the back. “It's been a rough couple of weeks.”
“So, about the porn,” Sean says, lowering his voice. “I was thinking it would be best to go with magazines. Porno movies might be too obvious. Besides, it'd be easier to connect them back to me, since I work in a video store.”
“I doubt she'd even think about it. It's not like Blockbuster specializes in porn.”
“Mom doesn't necessarily know that.”
“I guess you're right.”
“What are you guys talking about?” Sophie asks, strolling over to us. She leans up against the counter.
“You really wanna know?” I say.
She grins. “I asked, didn't I?”
Fair enough.
“Gay porn.”
“Gay porn.”
“Is Blockbuster looking to expand their collection?” she asks.
“Not exactly,” Sean says, looking embarrassed. “We were, uh, asking for ourselves.”
“Oh.” She seems rightly alarmed.
“We need the porn for our mom's boyfriend,” I explain.
There's a sentence I never thought I'd say.
There's a sentence I never thought I'd say.
“Like lesbian stuff?” Sophie asks.
This conversation is getting more embarrassing by the second. Apparently, Sean agrees. “Let's continue this discussion outside,” he says, coming around from behind the counter and making a beeline for the door. Once we're outside the building and away from the prying eyes of his coworkers, Sean says, “We want a couple of magazines.”
I briefly fill her in on the plan to plant the incriminating evidence in Jude's yoga bag.
Sophie bursts out laughing. “You guys are insane. That'll never work.”
“It might,” I argue. “And we have to try. It's our only hope.”
“Well, if you're dead set on doing it, I might be able to help. Would a few issues of
Playgirl
work? They feature naked men. It would probably be pretty disturbing if a straight guy had them in his yoga bag.”
Playgirl
work? They feature naked men. It would probably be pretty disturbing if a straight guy had them in his yoga bag.”
“
Playgirl
would be perfect,” I say.
Playgirl
would be perfect,” I say.
“Okay. I have a couple of issues at my apartment. They're yours.”
“Really?” Sean and I say in unison.
“Do you mind if I ask why?”
She shrugs. “Evan used to buy them. He left a few at my place.”
I draw in a sharp breath. “Evan Hirschbaum's gay?!”
“No.”
“Then why
Playgirl
?” I ask. “And don't tell me he bought it for the articles!”
Playgirl
?” I ask. “And don't tell me he bought it for the articles!”
Sean's standing there with his mouth hanging open.
“He said he liked studying the male formâthe closer to perfection, the better. It gave him something to strive for.” Sophie's expression shifts as she talks. “Now that I think about it, I guess it
was
slightly weird.” She shudders. “Anyway, I'll be glad to have the things out of my apartment. I should have thrown them in the garbage weeks ago.”
was
slightly weird.” She shudders. “Anyway, I'll be glad to have the things out of my apartment. I should have thrown them in the garbage weeks ago.”
Sean shakes his head. “We can't take them.” He looks uncomfortable. “They're
used
.”
used
.”
“So?” I ask.
“So,” Sean says pointedly. “The pages might be . . . stuck together.”
“Guys, Evan didn't . . . they're not.” Sophie frowns. “Let's just say the magazines are in pristine condition and leave it at that. Now, do you want them or not?”
“We'll take them,” I say. “Thanks.”
Â
Â
I hang out with Sophie until three in the morning and, as a result, don't get out of bed until noon the next day. Ordinarily, this wouldn't be a problemâI love sleeping late and do it virtually every chance I getâbut today I've got a packed schedule. In addition to a host of errandsâI've got to do two loads of laundry, pick up shirts at the dry cleaner, go grocery shoppingâI promised Craig I'd come into the office for a few hours and catch up on work. I'm seriously falling behind.
Â
I hang out with Sophie until three in the morning and, as a result, don't get out of bed until noon the next day. Ordinarily, this wouldn't be a problemâI love sleeping late and do it virtually every chance I getâbut today I've got a packed schedule. In addition to a host of errandsâI've got to do two loads of laundry, pick up shirts at the dry cleaner, go grocery shoppingâI promised Craig I'd come into the office for a few hours and catch up on work. I'm seriously falling behind.
Plus, I'm meeting Krista and Jason for an early dinner at an Indian restaurant in Jamaica Plain. It's bring-your-own-wine, and I've offered to pick up a bottle of merlot. I grab a shower and then quickly get dressed. Before I head out the door, I stop and check my e-mail. I'm pleasantly surprised to find a message from Brady Simms. It's been a while, but he finally wrote!
Â
From:
“Brady K. Simms”
From:
“Brady K. Simms”
Sent:
Saturday, June 25, 10:12 a.m.
Saturday, June 25, 10:12 a.m.
Subject:
Long time, no speak
Long time, no speak
Hi Dani,
Greetings from Arizona! That's right, I've flown the coop and headed out west. What can I say? The frigid Boston summer finally got to meâI was craving scalding sun and 110-degree temperatures. Seriously, my mother had some unexpected legal issues and needed me to fly out here and take care of them. I'll be heading back your way in a few days, and I was hoping we could still have that movie date. I've been thinking about you a lot, and I'd really love to see you. How about my place, this Wednesday night at 8 p.m.? I'll make dinner; you bring a DVD. ~Brady Simms
P.S. Is Italian cool?
Â
Well. This is interesting for several reasons. First, not only does he suggest we hook up for a dinner-and-a-movie
date,
but he thinks we should do it
at his place
. That's a far cry from meeting at the theater for a Sunday matinee. And he suggested a firm time, which proves he's able to commit. If that doesn't classify as an Actual Date, I don't know what does. I decide to stop overanalyzing his e-mail and just answer the damn thing.
Well. This is interesting for several reasons. First, not only does he suggest we hook up for a dinner-and-a-movie
date,
but he thinks we should do it
at his place
. That's a far cry from meeting at the theater for a Sunday matinee. And he suggested a firm time, which proves he's able to commit. If that doesn't classify as an Actual Date, I don't know what does. I decide to stop overanalyzing his e-mail and just answer the damn thing.
Â
From:
“Danielle Myers”
From:
“Danielle Myers”
Sent:
Saturday, June 25, 1:09 p.m.
Saturday, June 25, 1:09 p.m.
Subject:
RE: Long time, no speak
RE: Long time, no speak
Hello, stranger! Good to hear from you. Hope the Southwest is treating you well. I'm checking my schedule for this
Wednesday. Let's see, I've got brain surgery at four, trapeze lessons at six, dog walking at seven . . . okay, eight works. Italian is very cool. I assume you mean the food, not the language. But in case you were wondering, I love the language, too. Very sexy. Never mind. I'll shut up now.
Dani
P.S. What kind of movies do you like?
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