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Authors: Madhur Nevatia

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NINETEEN

 

 

By the time
they got back, the party meter had cranked up several notches. Sameera and
Gautam mingled in the crowd and drifted away from each other towards the
comfort of their own friends. Sanjay caught up with Gautam and Sameera saw him
hold his ears in mock apology as Tanya stood smiling at the two of them. The DJ
played rocking house music; Goan Rumba and Pineapple Mojito cocktails flowed
like water, and everyone was in a groovy party mood.

Gautam put
aside his inhibitions and hit the dance floor with Mihir and Rohan. At
midnight, when the party was officially over and the elders retired to their
rooms, the youngsters carried their party to the beach. The girls discarded
their heels while the guys threw off their jackets, rolled up their trousers
and flung aside their crisp shirts. The party had turned into a private
carnival.

Soon
everybody was tired and sleepy and the party started dispersing. Gautam and
Sameera found themselves walking together towards their cottages. They walked
silently, companionably through the lush gardens. Majestic cycas and fragrant
frangipanis shone in the moonlight, the waves swished in the distance.

He waited as
she fumbled with her door.

Slowly she
turned around. “Are you annoyed with me, Gautam?”

“Should I
be?”

She moved
towards him, stood close to him, their hands almost touching. “I’m really tired
but we could sit here for a bit.”

The wicker
chairs seemed very inviting. He longed to just sit there wrapped in her arms,
her head resting on his chest; but he had already made her cry once and did not
want to upset her further. He looked at her solemnly, “Since you are tired, why
don’t you rest now, Sameera? We’ll talk tomorrow. Good night.” He turned around
and went into his cottage.

 

***

 

Sameera
stood at the door for a long time, waiting for her nerves to settle. Her
apparent lack of trust had annoyed him but he too was unpredictable, one minute
he wanted to spend time with her, the next he was desperate to get away. Not
many guys would have walked away from her like he did, but then he was unlike
most guys she had met.


 

TWENTY

 

 

The morning was bright and clear. Sameera was mesmerized by the riot of colors
in the garden. Tanya was still fast asleep as were their other friends, so she
walked alone towards the beach, inhaling deeply, the fresh air a treat for her
Mumbai lungs. She kicked off her shorts and gently waded into the cool waters
in her yellow, one-piece Speedo costume. She sat at the edge, letting the water
sweep over her body through her toes to her waist.

“Hey. What a
surprise. Did you come looking for me?” Gautam stood in his blue beach shorts,
taut and tanned. “Just kidding. Good to see someone else enjoying Goa in its
true glory. Come along.” He walked off authoritatively.

Sameera
decided to follow him, with no extra baggage.

Gautam
headed for the water sports section. They got into a banana boat and he made
her sit in front; she clung tightly to the sides, her stomach churning with
each exaggerated turn. Just when she thought she had survived, Gautam let out a
loud whistle and the boatman toppled the boat. They were flung into the water
with the boat on top of them. Gautam pulled her up as she struggled to save her
life. He was in splits. “You should really see your face right now Sameera. You
can’t get your money’s worth if they don’t topple you.”

She was
hugely embarrassed to find they were in shallow waters that reached only till
their waists. Now that she had defeated death and was safe, she started
giggling.

“What do we
do next?”

“That’s the
spirit. Bump-ride time.”

By the time
it ended, Sameera had become an adrenalin junkie and craved for more, so they
went parasailing. The speedboat towing them maneuvered deftly and they went
high up in the air. She felt like a bird as she soared with Gautam. After a
fiercely competitive water scooter round, they flopped on the beach, tired and
contented.

After a
lavish breakfast in the restaurant, Sameera walked to her cottage with a skip
in her step. She had enjoyed with Gautam and this was the first time that they
had met without things souring between them.

For a long
time, she had been looking forward to her spa appointment, now she was more
impatient to meet Gautam again.

 

***

 

The poolside
was bejeweled with little lights that sparkled like a million stars. Music
wafted in the air. Smartly dressed waiters floated around carrying trays laden
with exotic appetizers and colorful drinks. Gautam was perched on a bar stool,
enjoying his cocktail, but his eyes scanned the room for Sameera. A barrage of
whistles and catcalls made him look up. Sameera and her gang of girls were
grooving to
Radha Likes to Party
. Clad in a white
sharara
, with
long flowing hair, hint of a midriff, dozens of sparkling silver bangles on
delicate wrists, and long dangling earrings, she shimmered under the disco
globes.
Enchantress.
Gautam couldn’t take his eyes off her.

When her
dance got over he turned his back to the stage. After the choreographed
tamasha
everyone hit the dance floor but Gautam was in no mood. What the hell was
Sameera still doing? Why couldn’t she join him for a drink? Irritated again, he
almost did not hear her soft voice behind him.

“Hi. Can I
lend you a pair of dancing shoes?”

He turned
around. “Someone has to be the audience too.”

“It’s
interval time. Let’s go and dance.”

“Don’t go.
Come with me, please.” He led her towards the beach. The weather was perfect.

“Thanks for
looking me up, Sameera.”

Sameera
smiled up at him.

“There are
some things I should tell you. I’m not a teenager anymore and don’t like cat
and mouse games; I don’t chase well nor do I like being chased. I like
everything in black and white.” She looked at him quizzically and was about to
speak but stopped when she heard him say, “I want to kiss you Sameera. I can’t
beat around the bush anymore.” He bent and kissed her softly on the cheek. She
stood absolutely still.

“I have to
be honest to myself. Now you can slap me if you want to.”

Before she
could react, a girl on a walkie-talkie screeched. “Madam, the finale song ‘
Sharara

comes up next. Tanya madam is already waiting.” Sameera was torn between the
two but Gautam nodded his consent even as the wedding planner’s assistant
tugged at her arm.

Bad
timing.
She craned her neck and her eyes lingered on his back till she
could no longer spot him in the darkness. She felt the warmth of his lips on
her cheek long after that.

He took a
solitary walk on the beach. He’d finally told her how he felt. The ball was in
her court. He knew about her past, had known about it for a while. Tortured and
tormented by Sameera’s tears, Gautam had approached Tanya who had confided in
him but under oath not to let Sameera know. It would be no use anyway. If she
could not bring herself to share her trauma with him, how could they share a
happy life together?

How he
wished she would give him a chance to love her, protect her, cherish her.
Scenic Goa, the romantic resort, absence of work pressure, and the opportunity
to spend quality time with each other...if all this could not make her open up,
what would? To top all this, he looked better than ever. What more could a man
do?

Sameera
danced to the music almost mechanically, her mind was elsewhere but there was
no getting away now; anything she wanted to tell Gautam would have to wait. The
rest of the evening was spent by Tanya’s side. There was still no sign of
Gautam.

“You can’t
expect him to be around for two days of back-to-back
nach gaana
, but he
did put his best foot forward,” Sanjay explained to her.


 

TWENTY-ONE

 

 

She lingered
outside his cottage for a long time and finally mustered the courage to knock
but there was no answer. She had his number but was too nervous to call him. He
could be at the beach or at the fort, but how could she be brazen enough to
pursue him there? It was a calm, peaceful night, not a soul stirred. All she
wanted to do was see him.

With her
sandals in her hand and her heart pounding, she walked on the soft sands
looking for him. Where the hell was he? She tried calling out for him. No
response. Exhausted, she sank on the soft sand as the tears rolled down her
cheeks. She sat there crying for what seemed to be an eternity and finally
trudged back to her cottage.

As she fumbled
with the keys in the darkness, a voice called out “Need help?” She swung around
to find Gautam sitting in one of the cane chairs in the darkness.

“Goodness,
why are you crying? Here, let me open the door.”

“You stupid
man, I’m not crying because I couldn’t open the door.” She hit him hard on his
shoulder.

“Ouch! What
was that for? Stop crying for once and sit down. Where were you? I’ve been
waiting here for ages.” Sameera started sobbing again. Gautam led her into the
room and seated her on the bed. He pointed to the bed, “Can I sit next to you?”
She nodded. He got her a glass of water and some tissues and sat down beside
her, wiped her tears gently and urged her to take a sip of water. She was still
clutching her sandals. He took them from her and put them down. Tucking strands
of her hair behind her ears, he finally asked, “Why are you so sad?”

“I’m tired
of taking care of myself.” Her body heaved with her sobs. “I know I’m partly to
blame but I’m scared to trust anyone, but also scared to spend the rest of my
life alone.”

“Oh Sameera,
how can someone as lovely as you worry about spending your life alone? But
before that, there are other things that you have to figure out. Why don’t you
just try to relax and get some sleep right now? We could catch up some time
tomorrow.”

“No Gautam,
please don’t go now. I must tell you something.”

“Okay, then,
but first go and freshen up.”

When Sameera
came back, she’d half expected Gautam to have left. But she was pleasantly
surprised; he was waiting patiently in the garden with a room service order of
coffee and sandwiches. Washed and scrubbed, she looked like a timid schoolgirl
in her pajamas. Gautam insisted that she eat first. She was ravenous and only
when she bit into the sandwich did she realize that she had eaten nothing since
evening. He poured her some coffee and sat quietly, waiting for her to finish.
Dressed casually he looked young, but he had an air of maturity and authority
around him that made him look older and wiser than he probably was.

“It happened
many years ago. I was engaged to a guy named Kabir...” He knew her history; it
would be difficult for her to relive the trauma, but she needed the catharsis.
He held her hand, occasionally wiping her tears, gazing straight into her eyes.

“How do I
bring myself to trust my judgment again?” Her voice was reduced to a hoarse
whisper. She rested her face on his chest.

He gently
stroked her hair, “Sameera, I wish I could wipe away your pain. I cannot begin
to tell you how sorry I am. I know there is no way I can fathom the depth of
your sorrow, but one thing is for sure, if I can ever lay my hands on that
swine, I will kill him. I will kill him if it is the last thing I do.”

They sat
wrapped in each other’s arms.

“You have
trusted me with your deepest pain and I honor that. I knew about this because I
made Tanya tell me, but it was very important for me to hear it from you.” He
pulled away and looked at her. “Are you angry with me?”

Sameera did
not say anything; she just clutched him harder.

”Nothing
that I say will wipe away your insecurities; you need to trust yourself first.
It wasn’t your fault after all.” They sat together, crying unabashedly, rocking
gently, in a tight embrace. She felt lighter while he was overcome with anger
and grief. “My darling. I will always cherish you. There may be issues and
problems that life throws at us, but we will deal with everything together. I
do not have any illusions of being perfect, I can be rude, moody, abrasive, but
I know I am perfect for you. Please, let’s give our love a chance. Be mine.”
He’d wanted to say the words that burned his mind, but all he actually managed
to say was, “Let me take you inside.”

She
staggered in after him, holding his hand tightly. She slipped into bed without
letting go of his hand. It was a surreal feeling. Her mind felt free but her
body had collapsed. The strain was too much for her to bear. Through
intermittent sobs, she pulled him in with her. “Don’t go.”

“I won’t.”
He pulled the covers over her, bent down and kissed her forehead. “Trust your
heart Sameera. Good night.” She turned and fitted into him perfectly as she
fell asleep, ensconced in his tight embrace.


 

TWENTY-TWO

 

 

When she got
up, he was gone. She had actually spent the whole night with him, wrapped in
his arms, yet she felt no guilt, no shame in the morning. She had slept more
peacefully than she could ever remember. Being the thorough gentleman that he
was, he had quietly left in the morning, giving her space to deal with her own
emotions in privacy. Sameera looked at herself in the mirror; “What does my
heart really say?”

The
festivities of the day were about to begin and there was no time to soul-search.
There was a knock on the door. Gautam? She ran to open the door and was
surprised to find a waiter from room service carrying breakfast.

“I’m sorry
but there must be a mistake. I have not ordered anything.”

The waiter
handed her a card that read “
Pehle pait pooja
. Another hectic day ahead.
Cheers, Gautam”.

She stood at
the door, reading the card over and over again even as the waiter laid the
table for her. For her this was romance at its best. He was ready to take care
of her, could she reciprocate?

Soon Sameera
was engulfed in the barrage of festivities. She could not desert Tanya in the
midst of
chuda, haldi,
lunch
, milni
and the actual wedding.

 

***

 

She was with
Tanya at the parlor, arguing over the right shade of lipstick for her when
Tanya abruptly clutched Sameera’s hand. “Do you like him?”

“What? Who?”

“You know
jolly well who. Still, if you want to be daft, do you like Gautam?”

“Yes I do. I
hardly know him well, but he’s different from every other guy I know.” Sameera
fidgeted with her hair. “I love him but am afraid to commit. I’m so confused.”

“Just trust
your instinct Sam. I know what’s bugging you. But do you see any similarity
between Gautam and Kabir? Sanjay has known Gautam forever; he’s a loving son, a
loyal friend, with unquestionable integrity. He’s madly in love with you; even
a blind man can see it.”

Sameera
could no longer control her tears.

“Just think
about it, and do what you have to do. You deserve to be happy and I deserve a
sexy, handsome
jiju
like him.”

Sameera did
not budge. She kept combing her hair while a thousand thoughts crossed her
mind. Gautam had tried to take care of her but did not demand anything from
her. If she could not trust him whom could she trust ever again? Life was
offering her a second chance and it was up to her to seize it. “I have to go,”
she said, dropping the brush on the floor.

Tanya gave
her a tight hug and held the door open for her.

 

***

 

Once
outside, she did not know what to do. Mustering all her courage, she dialed
Gautam’s number. “Come and see me at Bay point. NOW.”

The seconds
passed very slowly. She strained her eyes till they hurt. Her throat was
parched. Just when she thought she would faint with anxiety, she saw Gautam. He
was running—tuxedo and all—a full-bodied dash towards her.

As soon as
he reached her, he scooped her in his arms in one fluent motion. She remained
within the circle of his arms, not seeking release. He kissed her softly on the
cheek and once again, the same soft, melting sensation engulfed her.

“Do you love
me?” she blurted.

“Wow. That’s
direct.” He put her down and held her hand.

She
repeated, “Do you love me?” He put her hand on his wildly beating heart and
held her gaze.

“Always
have.” His voice was deep and husky, choked with emotion.

“What about
your ‘love-at-first-sight girl’ at the airport?” Her brow creased theatrically.

He neither
blinked nor moved. “That was you.”

“What
rubbish. You met me for the first time at Sanjay’s farmhouse.”

“Correct, I
met
you there for the first time, but I
saw
you at the airport taxi stand,
negotiating how to load your luggage. You were wearing a pink floral dress.”

“Oh my God.
Where were you?”

“In the taxi
queue.”

“But you
were so rude and indifferent towards me after that.”

“That is how
hot-blooded males display their love.” He cocked an eyebrow. “It must have
worked or else we would not be standing here now.”

“Bullshit.”

“Strategy.”

“Investment
banker or romance strategist, Gautam?”

“I promise
there is much more to me. Hang on and you shall see.”

Her voice
fell into a whisper. “My mom has to approve of you.”

“First tell
me if you approve of me.” He drew her closer, wiping the tears as they rolled
down her cheeks.

“I do.” She
sniffed.

“So does
she. I’ve met her. Had to meet her after Tanya told me everything.”

She was
amazed. He had cared enough to even meet her mother.
He cares. He cares.
The words kept repeating in her head. “How long have you been plotting and
scheming behind my back?”

“It seems
like a lifetime. Don’t know how much longer I can carry on wooing.”

She puckered
her face in a mock frown. “Wooing? You will have to be more romantic than
this.”

He put his
hand in his pocket and brought out a small red, velvet box. He opened it,
revealing a sparkling diamond solitaire hanging on a thin gold chain that he
clasped around her neck. “Your neck drives me wild. You cannot imagine how many
hours I have spent dreaming about touching it, caressing it, kissing it. This
diamond is actually a warning: Private property. Hope you like it.”

Sameera felt
a lump in her throat. This was too good to be true. She’d found her knight in
black tuxedo and white shirt; her heart thudded at the love brimming in his
eyes. The wind blew a speck of sand into her eyes. As she squinted, he caught
her by her waist and blew into her eyes. Their lips brushed. It felt so right.
This time he would not let her go. He kissed her, on her forehead, cheeks,
neck, eyes and finally, her lips. Sameera kissed back and they stood entwined
for an eternity. Gautam did not want to let go; he picked her up in his arms
and walked towards the wedding venue. Sameera clung to him happily and smiled.
The setting sun had an amber glow, her peach
lehenga
was blowing in the
wind, and her Adonis with molten eyes was carrying her away to a land of
dreams. “Gautam, this is Tanya’s dream coming true.”

“No my
darling, this is my dream coming true.”


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