Z14 (Zombie Rules) (21 page)

             
“If it is, it’s like nothing I’ve seen before. Oh, this reminds me. When the girls get back, I have a journal I found on the night we made the fuel run. You might find it interesting. The man who wrote it actually opened up a zombie’s skull and inspected the brain. He described it as an onyx black color.”

             
“Oh, yeah? It certainly sounds like an interesting read.” The Captain said. He looked at the eyes a moment longer before standing. “Andie has tried to raise you on the radio frequently.”

             
I searched his face for any hidden, double entendre. He looked at me plainly, awaiting an answer. “The ice storm destroyed our radio antenna. I’ve not yet replaced it. I checked a nearby Radio Shack, but no luck. I was hoping to spot one on a business or home and salvage it. Otherwise, I’ll have to make a trip further into Nashville.”

             
“I see.” He said. Howard brought out some folding chairs when we walked back.

             
“I thought we’d sit outside and enjoy this sunny weather.” He said, and then looked at the Captain. “Unless, or course, you want to go inside.”

             
The Captain waved him off. “Outside is fine. We can soak up some of the rays, replenish our vitamin D.” He sat and smiled pleasantly.

             
“You have seemingly become acquaintances with Howard and his family.” He said.

             
“Yes sir, we have become very close friends.” I said.

             
“Have you met any other friends?” He asked after a moment.

             
“We’ve encountered a few people, how about you?” I asked.

             
He nodded. “One or two, nobody of note.” He looked around. “It is a rather pleasant day out, Howard. Do you think the weather is turning?”

             
“I’d say it’s a false spring.” Howard said. “We have a few more weeks of cold weather coming, I’m thinking.” The Captain looked at him and nodded thoughtfully.

             
“What crops do you plan on growing this spring, Captain?” I asked.

             
“We’re going to grow seed corn for the cattle and sweet corn for the dinner table. We’re going to be making several individual plots for various vegetables. We’ve got to replenish our stores and then of course we need to build up an ample supply for trading purposes.” He looked at me as if he needed affirmation.

             
“Excellent planning, Captain.” I said. He grinned broadly, his walrus moustache twitching in delight.

*****

              “Zach and Howard cleared the store of zombies, but we’ll still need to be careful.” Julie said.

             
“Can you two shoot?” Andie asked.

             
“Oh, yeah. Zach taught us both.” Julie responded.

             
“The Captain taught me.” Andie said. “He’s a crack shot.”

             
Julie nodded, and stored that factoid for later when she’d tell Zach. She drove up to the front entrance and stopped. She tapped the horn, waited a few seconds, and tapped it again.

             
“Why’d you do that?” Andie asked.

             
Macie laughed. “Rule number two.” Andie looked confused. “They’re attracted to noise. If there are any in there, they’ll come toward the noise.” Macie held a hand up. “Well, if the nasty shits can still walk.” The three of them laughed. “Is there anything you want to shop for Andie?”

             
Andie squirmed. “I need some things. You know.”

             
Julie and Macie looked at each other with understanding. “Us too. Let’s grab a shopping cart and head to the women’s section.”

             
They loaded up on what was left of the feminine hygiene products. “We’ll split this all up. I’ve no idea what we’re going to do when we run out though.”

             
“A sponge works, but it’s not very comfortable.” Andie lamented. Julie and Macie looked at each other.

             
“How long have you been doing that?” Macie asked.

             
“Long enough.” She muttered.

             
“Well, enough of that shit.” Macie said. “We’ll get you stocked up.” She smiled reassuringly at Andie, and then glanced at Julie, who was pointing her flashlight up and down the shelves. She suddenly reached out and grabbed a small box. “Did you find it?” She asked. Julie nodded and held it up for Macie to see.

             
“Do you want to do it here?” She asked. Julie nodded.

             
“But, I don’t want to go back in a dark restroom, and I’d rather not pee on the floor.” She said.

             
Macie giggled. “I bet there’s a bucket somewhere around here. You can squat over it.” They found one in the housewares section. Julie opened the package, dropped her pants, and hovered over the plastic pail while she urinated on the plastic device. Macie held a flashlight and peered closely.

             
“What are you doing?” Andie asked. Julie held it up to the light and smiled.

             
“We just confirmed it. Julie’s pregnant.” Macie said with a grin.

             
“I had a false alarm a short while ago.” Julie explained. “My period was late and I thought I was pregnant. I wanted to be sure this time before I tell Zach.”

             
“I may as well check too.” Macie said. Julie laughed and took the flashlight while Macie pulled her pants down and squatted over the bucket.

             
Andie’s eyes widened. “Wait, you’re sleeping with Zach too?” She asked.

             
“We’re all one very happy family.” Julie said. “Zach has told us all about you Andie. We think you’re a good person in a bad situation. We’d ask you to come live with us, but we don’t think the Captain would be willing to let you leave, would he?” Andie dropped her head and shook it slowly.

             
“Well, it looks like only one of us is going to be a mommy anytime soon.” Macie said as she looked at the results. She looked at Andie. “Do you need to do one?”

             
Andie shook her head again. “The Captain has had a vasectomy. So, I guess Zach told you about that too?”

             
“It’s okay. We don’t like your uncle.” Macie said. “But we want to be your friends. Us girls have to stick together, right?"

             
Andie smiled tentatively. “This is turning out to be a nice birthday.” She looked at them. “I turn sixteen today.”

*****

              “So, tell me Zach, what hardships have you encountered this winter?” The Captain asked. The five of us, Howard and me, the Captain, and his two minions were sitting in chairs outside of the tire store. We had been talking for a little over an hour now.

             
“The usual stuff. The ice and snow kept us hemmed up for far too long. We lost some cattle, not to mention our means of outside communication.” I said.

             
“What’d you do to pass the time, play hide the salami with those two whores?” Barry asked. I glared at him. He responded with a mocking grin.

             
“At ease, Barry.” The Captain said and returned his attention to me. “It was the same with us.” He paused in thought a moment. “Have you given any further thought to a trading post?” I nodded. I glanced again at Barry. He still had a stupid grin on his face. I wanted to slap it off.

             
“A spot in downtown Nashville would be the ideal location, but we both know it’s not feasible at this time. So, we have to think of a good secondary location. I’ve pondered over it and I’d say one of the truck stops on I-24 would be best. There is one at the county line. It is centrally located to where all of us live. I like the idea of a trading post being near the farms.”

             
“Where do you live kid?” Barry asked.

             
“None of your business.” I replied curtly. His stupid grin turned into a stupid scowl.

             
“George will find you.” He said menacingly. “When he does, maybe we’ll come pay a visit.”

             
I shook my head. “I’m afraid not. I’ve posted no trespassing signs. It’s strictly enforced.” Eli seemed to find it funny and guffawed. They were silenced by the Captain snapping his fingers.

             
“Barry, if I want any more of your commentary, I’ll beat it out of you.” He said calmly. He then continued speaking as if they were not there. “So, you have a plan thought out.”

             
“Yes. First, make a total sweep of the area. Clear it of all zombies and hostiles. Phase two will consist of preparing the facilities. You’ll need to harden the building and build good defensive positions against both zombies and highway men. The place has a big parking lot. It’ll hold a lot of people and vehicles. There is a creek nearby where you can distill water. Of course, the sanitation issues will need to be addressed. I’d start with something simple, like outhouses.” I was interrupted by Lashonda bringing a tray of coffee. I was the only one who thanked her.

             
The Captain sipped his coffee and made a hand motion. “Boys, listen to this young man. He’s smarter than the both of you combined.” They glared in silence. “Please continue, Zach.” He said.

             
“Phase three, send out scouting teams. Have them paint the location of the trading post on every billboard, road sign, and building along the Interstate corridor. This same team will also be looting and salvaging everywhere they go. Set up a radio and have frequent broadcasts. You advertise the trading post with an emphasis on its friendliness and safety. I’d recommend a woman be on the radio. A woman’s voice sounds a lot friendlier than a man’s. Andie would be a good person for the job. Hell, she could probably run the whole shebang.” I sipped some coffee and glanced at the two idiots. They were listening, but seemed bored. It was time to whet their appetites a little. I leaned forward.

             
“Guys, the Captain can explain it in more detail, but a meeting place like this will attract all kinds of commerce, including the world’s oldest profession.” They eyed me in confusion.

             
“Prostitution, you idiots.” The Captain said gruffly.

             
Eli clapped his hands together. “Now you’re talking!” The Captain eyed him. “Sorry.” Eli muttered.

             
“Now some people think the only way to obtain prostitutes is through forcible means, but believe me, there will be women and men who will be more than willing to ply the trade, for the right price.” I said. The Captain nodded.

             
“Who do you propose runs this trading post?” He asked.

             
I shrugged my shoulders. “In order for it to be run, and defended successfully, you’ll need at least a squad sized unit. So, you should be the person to run it.”

             
“You believe it could be subject to attack.” The Captain said.

             
I nodded. “Most definitely. Someone will eventually try it. And don’t forget, there will be petty issues which will need to be dealt with. In the past, there were cops and the court system. These people will look to you for settling any civil or criminal infractions.” The Captain nodded thoughtfully. He glanced over at his two minions.

             
“We’ll need to get started on this immediately.” He said. “Zach, I believe you’ve got it all thought out. Are you going to provide assistance in this endeavor?”

             
I shrugged. “You’ve got the manpower, but I’ll help however I can. Working out a bartering standard can be subjective, but I think I’ve got a viable formula.” I leaned forward toward the Captain, all the while keeping his two boys in my peripheral vision.

             
“Now, here’s the good part.” The Captain arched an eyebrow. “Taxes.” I said.

             
“What the fuck are you talking about?” Barry demanded. “Nobody pays taxes anymore.” Howard chuckled. Barry glared at him. “What the fuck are you laughing about, nigger?”

             
I stood quickly, as did Barry. I pointed at him. “Your name is Barry, right? Well Barry, you’ve worn out your welcome. Get out of here.”

             
“Do you think you’re going to make me leave, punk?” Barry said. I glanced at the Captain. He shrugged and smiled at me, as if to say, what are you going to do now boy?

             
The gauntlet was thrown, and let it never be said I backed down from a challenge. I purposely walked toward Barry. He waited for me to get close and suddenly tried for a roundhouse with his right fist. I ducked under it and responded with a right to his solar plexus. I twisted my hips to increase the effect. The many hours working out on the heavy bag paid off. He grunted in pain and stumbled back. I stayed on him, remembering Rick’s tutelage, and dictated the distance. I stepped forward quickly and began peppering him with punches to the head. They were having effect. Barry kept stumbling backward and I kept moving forward.