2 Hungry, Hungry Hoodoo (12 page)

“Did they give a deadline?” I asked Holden.

He folded his arms behind his back. “No. They also didn’t give a way to reach them.”

“So they want a public display,” Femi said.

“But what if Cheney isn’t involved? Maybe he would help us fake an execution. That way he would have his justice in the public eye and whoever is doing this would release Michael.”

“That’s putting an awful lot of faith in two people you don’t trust,” Olivia said softly.

“I hate doing nothing,” I said, matching her tone.

“You aren’t doing nothing. You still have access to the castle. You’re our eyes and ears inside,” Femi told me.

“We could help too,” Katrina said and charged on before I could object. “Sy’s place really isn’t big enough for both of us. I can talk to the other girls and get them all to move into the castle with me. Cheney would have to let us stay because if you have to keep up appearances, so does he. With four of us snooping around the castle, surely we can discover something.”

“I don’t know—”

“Sebastian might be willing to talk to me, too.”

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Sy asked.

I didn’t like the idea of them snooping around, but Katrina was probably right that they’d be good at it. “What about breaking the bond? Can we do that?”

“We don’t know that you need to. He might be innocent,” Olivia said.

“Even if he is, I want it broken. I need space. I need to figure out what I want and how I feel without being magically influenced.”

“Okay, we’ll get back together in a couple days.” Femi went to the bar to talk to Sy and Katrina. Olivia and Holden, judging by their distant expressions, were talking silently with one another. I was alone with my thoughts and the pain in my chest from missing Cheney.

“I’m going to go lie down. I have a headache,” I told Sy and headed for the back.

Holden caught my arm and pulled me over to him and Olivia. “I might be able to redirect your feelings. It would be a very temporary fix, definitely not a solution. And it could backfire. Magical bonds are a pain in the ass.”

“I don’t think you should break it. If Holden can ease the effects so you can wait this out, that’s what I recommend,” Olivia said. “Let Holden try.”

Holden frowned at her. “I might not be able to do anything. I told you this isn’t the same as that. You’re thinking with your heart. Magic has nothing to do with souls. You and I are bonded on a molecular level; she is bonded by a spell. It’s more like the arrangements the jinn have with demons. But instead of having her soul, Cheney has her life. If she dies, he dies and vice versa. That’s why no one gets married in the Abyss.”

My eyebrows shot up. No one had explained this to me before. “So that’s why he came to help me when the bounty hunters were after me? If I die, he dies.”

Holden nodded. “Probably. Breaking this bond might actually fix a lot of your immediate problems.”

“You don’t know that,” Olivia argued, frowning right back at him. “If they love each other, Holden, why break them up.”

“Who says they’re in love?” he shot back. “Not everyone thinks with their heart.”

I looked back and forth between the two of them. How on earth did they ever end up together? “Why would he bond himself to me? I won’t live as long as him.”

“Exactly,” Olivia said with a triumphant smile.

Holden rolled his eyes. “You will so long as you’re bonded.”

Again, that was news to me. “And had I decided to stay a human?”

“Cheney would have a very short life expectancy.”

I shook my head. I had a lot to consider. “I’m going to tough this out until I can break the bond, but thank you for your offer to help.” I looked at Olivia. “The problem I have is the more I remember, the more I doubt I ever loved Cheney. I don’t know if the pull I feel toward him is my true feelings or the side effect of whatever plan I had. And I don’t want to decide the rest of my life based on manufactured feelings. And then there’s Jaron.” I looked toward the door. “I’m not indifferent to him.”

Olivia smiled. “That’s very logical.” She looked at Holden out of the corner of her eye and placed a gentle hand on my arm. “But love isn’t logical. Even the strongest magic can’t make your heart lie. Only you can know what you truly feel.” She released me and took Holden’s hand. He kissed the back of hers.

“If you change your mind …” he said absently, no longer interested in me as he watched Olivia glow.

I went back into Sy’s apartment and lay on the couch. All I had to do was break an impossible bond, steal Michael’s finger back, save him, and swear off men for the rest of my life and the world would be perfect.

“That was the craziest meeting I’ve ever been to.” Katrina plopped down by my feet. “Femi is sort of hilarious. What the hell happened when you and Olivia disappeared?”

“What? I didn’t disappear.”

“You did too. She put her hand on you and poof you were both gone.”

“They weren’t gone,” Sy said from the doorway. “Olivia is a guardian. She was healing Selene. That generally makes them invisible to mortals.”

“Oh, and Holden. Is he a guardian too?”

Sy laughed. “Are you okay, coz?”

“I’m great,” I mumbled. “Can you cancel my meeting with Jaron tonight? I’m not up for another memory. I already have too much to think about.”

“Sure. If you need anything, let me know.”

I sat up. “Are you really going back to castle?”

“It’s already arranged. I spoke with Sebastian and the girls. Selene, I want to help. We all want to help. We’ll be fine and figure all of this out. Besides, I don’t think Cheney’s guilty. I like him and I like the way you are when you’re with him—less cautious and more alive. I think the two of you will work things out.”

“I hope you’re right.”

“Now I say we get some ice cream and wine and watch chick flicks.”

It was hard to argue with such a solid plan.

I walked into the gym right on time but with heavy circles under my eyes. Sleep was a fickle lover, taunting me, but never taking me all night long. And while I’d tossed and turned, a new question had assailed me. Why hadn’t the bond affected me before I knew about it? Sebastian looked up and gave his typical greeting. After I sat, he said, “So are you going to tell me the details?”

I shrugged.

Sebastian raised an eyebrow. “One of you has to. Cheney won’t say anything, but he paced the hallways all night. All Katrina said was that you’d be staying with Sy for a while—wouldn’t tell me why. What can be so bad?”

I bit my lip and shook my head. If Cheney didn’t tell him, then I wouldn’t either.

Sebastian sighed.

“I do have a question though. Why didn’t our bond affect me my whole life?”

“The bond was with your elf half, which was dormant. Whatever spell you were under was strong enough to suppress the bond along with your memories.”

“So if Cheney died while I was a human, would I have died too?”

He frowned. “I honestly don’t know.”

I chewed on my fingernail.
Interesting.
“But if I had died, he would have as well.”

“Are you so angry that you’re thinking about becoming human and killing him?”

I gave a one-shouldered shrug. If he killed Michael to scare me into staying with him, I might consider it.

Sebastian laughed. “Let me know if I need to look for a new job.”

“It’s not funny.”

“Selene, you and Cheney fight. It’s what you do, but neither of you are bad people. You’ll work through whatever happened.”

Though I had my doubts, he was missing the point. “It’s not about our fight,” I muttered.

He looked back at me, his expression serious again. “Care to elaborate?”

I shook my head.

He gave me a strange look and his expression softened. “You can trust me.”

“Of course I can, you’re only Cheney’s advisor.”

And like that, his face was back to normal. “Well, if you aren’t staying here, then you better be able to transport yourself.” He knelt across from me. “Elf magic is different from human magic in that it’s innate. A part of you. You don’t need words or circles to cast a spell.”

I nodded, but it didn’t make sense. I’d spent years learning how to cast and what he was suggesting broke all of the rules.

“It’s like your telekinetic ability. How do you control it?”

“I, umm, hmm. Well, I guess I just, you know, will it to happen.” It was harder to articulate than I imagined, but Sebastian nodded encouragingly. “So you want me to will myself into another room?”

“Yes, we’ll start there.” He stood up and offered me a hand.

I tried and nothing happened. I was so tired, and I didn’t want to do this. I didn’t want to do anything. My body ached like I’d run a marathon. I absently rubbed my breastbone and my mind drifted to Cheney drinking in the study. Where was he now? Was he thinking about me? My eyes drifted closed as I ignored Sebastian’s incessant talking, and I could almost smell the dusty old books and Cheney’s scent that was always laced with sandalwood. When I opened my eyes, I was standing behind the soft leather chair I’d sat in across from Cheney only yesterday. The room was dark and empty, silent as death. I didn’t celebrate my success or hurry back to Sebastian. I walked along the bookcases, trailing my finger along the spines, trying to listen to my heart, but my heart wasn’t talking. My mind, however, wouldn’t be quiet. I sat in Cheney’s chair and remembered his voice asking me if I’d ever loved him.

A pretty box made of interwoven pieces of various metals sat on the table beside me, gleaming even in the low light. I touched it lightly, trying to open it, but it was locked. I stared at it a moment, and then with a flick of my telekinetic mind, the lid popped up. The contents took a moment to register. I looked again. What the fuck?

The click of the door being shut made me jump out of the chair. I tore my gaze from the box. Cheney strolled toward me, his hands in his pocket. I backed up.
Oh shit.

“Selene.” His voice was soft. My eyes kept darting to the box then to him as I backed away, putting the chair between us. He frowned and followed my gaze. His eyes widened. “I can explain.”

“Whose heart is that?”

His jaw clenched. “I’m not sure, but I think it is …” He paused as if he had trouble saying the name. “Michael’s.”

My stomach lurched. I wanted to throw up, run away from him. “Why?” I kept moving back and he kept advancing. “How could you?”

His eyes widened even further, and he stopped. “You don’t think I did this? What could I possibly have to gain by killing a human who was no longer in your life?”

“You tell me.”

“Nothing. I have nothing to gain. This is why I wasn’t in the gym with Sebastian this morning. I went to Sy’s hoping to intercept you. I think you need to come back to the castle. It isn’t safe for you out there.”

“I’m not so sure it’s safe for me in here,” I said under my breath. Hurt filled his eyes.

“You don’t mean that.” He was in front of me in a blink, and I didn’t have time to move away. The back of his hand brushed against my cheek and relief washed over me, but I fought against it. “I know somewhere in there you know you don’t mean it.”