Read 3rd World Products, Book 17 Online

Authors: Ed Howdershelt

3rd World Products, Book 17 (2 page)

BOOK: 3rd World Products, Book 17
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Finishing her beer, Lori said, “I guess you’ll have to explain that one to me.”

Finishing my own beer, I said, “Okay. Take any ten women on the street, put guns in their hands, and let each one go through exactly what she went through that night. Maybe six of them would be able to pull a trigger at all. Only about four might actually shoot at the guy running away. Maybe one or two could aim well enough under that kind of stress to hit him. Why?”

With a flat gaze and an equally flat tone, Lori said, “You tell me.”

“It isn’t strictly because they’re women. Any guesses?”

“No. I want to hear what you think.”

“Let’s start with training and experience. Most gun owners have some range time with paper targets. That’s all. They’ve never shot while ringing with adrenalin. They’ve never shot anything alive before. Most of ‘em wouldn’t have the guts to put Old Yeller out of his rabid misery. They’d likely just try to lock him up and get away from the noise until it stopped. Then there’s the matter of armed aggression. People in general aren’t prepped to deal with it. Joe or Jane, doesn’t matter. And they’ve had it drilled into their brains that killing is wrong. They’ve also had it drilled into their heads that the law won’t necessarily be on your side if you have to do it and the legal and emotional aftermath is an ugly ordeal. Nikki was booked for suspicion of murder briefly. Know why?”

Lori’s eyes widened slightly, but she silently shook her head.

“Investigation. That’s all. Nothing interferes with a homicide investigation. If there’d been witnesses, probably no problem. But there weren’t, so forensics needed time to try to prove or disprove her story. Meanwhile she was asked in a dozen different ways whether she knew the guy she’d shot in any manner whatsoever. In some states she’d still be in jail. A grand jury still has to render a decision about whether to take her to trial or no-bill her. She had to have a judge’s okay to make the Miami trip and only her association with 3rd World made that happen. If, for some bizarre reason, this went to trial, her fate would rest in the hands of thirteen strangers; the judge and a lawyer-picked jury. In other words, people generally fear the legal system as much as — or even
more
than — they fear having to shoot someone. All of that and more is what made her hesitate and lose her hubby, then shoot too late. And all of that was completely unavoidable because she’d never in her life had to actually
use
a gun for its intended purpose.”

Lori stated, “Like that marksman guy in Africa you told me about who got shot because he couldn’t pull the trigger.”

“Yup. Maybe if he’d seen a buddy die in front of him first he’d have worked up the nerve. Or not. Some can, some just can’t.”

“So you basically did with her what you did with Elizabeth. You took her to a beach, got her drunk, and fought with her until she got over her problem.”

“Well… Sort of. I guess. Milking her for details until she couldn’t avoid seeing the truth could be considered a battle. It was like pulling teeth to get useful answers sometimes. Now you tell me something, ma’am. Why did I tell you all this?”

Lori canted her head and gave me a questioning look, then asked, “Because you know I’ll never tell a soul about it?”

“Too trite. What’s a much more likely reason?”

“You think I’ll have to do the same thing someday.”

“I
know
you will. You
care
, therefore you
will
try to help someone through something equally traumatic someday.”

Getting up, I asked, “Ready for another beer yet?”

Looking startled to realize her bottle was empty, Lori nodded as she handed it to me. “Yes. Thanks.”

As I went inside for the new beers, I set a probe high above the yard and magnified the view. As I’d expected, Lori was touching her burns and gritting her teeth, but she didn’t really seem to be in much agony. The nanobots would help with pain as well as injury, but the initial burning sensations from pressures would still be felt. I let the probe vanish.

Retrieving the throat spray and some aloe lotion from the bathroom, I carried them out with the beers and set them on the table before I opened her beer and handed it to her.

Sipping her beer as she read the spray’s label, Lori asked, “This stuff really works on skin, too?”

“Yup. Always carried some as a medic.” I grinned. “There were always a few guys who couldn’t believe they’d get sunburned.”

She gave me a glance and, “Ha, ha,” then sprayed some on the back of her upper left arm.

I said, “Let it sit a few seconds, then rub it in.
Gently
.”


Gently
‘ earned me another glance. I grinned and shrugged.

“Want me to spray your back, ma’am?”

“Let’s see how this works first.”

“I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised. It should be safe to touch that spot by now.”

She did so, then touched it again a bit harder. As if to compare, she pressed an unsprayed spot the same way and hissed at the difference.

I chuckled, “Toldja. Good stuff, isn’t it?”

Lori grinned and studied the label again. “Yes, it certainly is.”

Looking at me with a speculative expression, she abruptly stood up and walked around the table to hand me the spray, then turned around, took off her shirt, and said, “Okay. Yes, please do my back.”

Setting my beer on the table, I replied, “As you command, milady,” and stood up.

Lightly spritzing her shoulders first, I worked my way down her back, then returned to her shoulders to gently smear the stuff around. By the time I’d finished there, she’d relaxed from holding herself against the continuous pain of the burn. Her tentative deep breath turned into a sigh of relief.

When I finished with her back, I set the spray down and picked up my beer. Lori turned and studied me for a moment, then said, “These are the kinds of things that always amaze me about you, Ed. No matter what the problem is, you always seem to know what to do.”

“Wanna know what to do now, ma’am?”

Her left eyebrow lifted slightly. “Sure. What?”

I picked up the lotion and said, “Use this before the numbing wears off. Then you’ll be able to take a deep breath without feeling as if your skin’s going to split open.”

I used a finger to make a circular gesture and she turned back around. The cream was still cool from being in the house. Drawing a line of it on her shoulder made her flinch slightly, then she snickered, “For a moment there, I almost thought that was more pain.”

As I spread the stuff around, I said, “Nope. Pain is something you’ll never get from me, sweetie. I may criticize occasionally, but it’s always to try to improve things. Never to deride. Take this sunburn; it’s the kind of thing you had to learn for yourself, as well as how to handle it. I could only warn you. I couldn’t actually
order
you to do anything to prevent it.”

Lori said, “I’ve seen the ‘bots heal a bad gash in minutes. Why haven’t they been able to cure this burn yet?”

“Because you’ve damaged — or killed — a few layers of about twenty square feet of your body, ma’am.”

“There’s that much skin on people?”

Smoothing the lotion around the small of her back and hips, I replied, “Yup. More or less. If you’re still hurting later, I’ll spray you after your shower and give you another lotion rub so you’ll be able to lie flat and get to sleep.”

When I finished, I set the lotion down and picked up my beer. As I sipped, Lori rolled her shoulders and lifted her arms, then stretched a bit and shot me a grin.

Reaching for her own beer, she said, “Thanks. I’ve been afraid to move or sit since we left the beach.” Sipping, she eyed me thoughtfully as she sat down and said, “Don’t take this the wrong way, okay? But I have a question.”

“Can’t take it any way at all until I know what it is.”

With a little moue, she nodded and carefully slipped back into her t-shirt as she said, “Okay, here goes; you’ve been watching me all day. ‘
Leering
’ is the word Aunt Lisa would use. And you’ve been saying little things like how my legs are so fine they ought to be enshrined somewhere.”

“Yeah? And? All true as I see things. Let me know when my thinking you’re gorgeous starts to hurt, ma’am.”

She’d started to sip again and paused to snicker, “Sure I will. I’m not sure how they could be ‘enshrined’, since I’d have to give them up for something like that. But right now I’m wondering something, Ed. You’ve always wanted to get your hands on me, but just now you slapped on that lotion and stopped as soon as you finished my back. I’m wondering why you didn’t offer to do my legs, too.”

I shrugged. “I don’t tease myself like that, Lori. After our near miss a couple of years ago, I put you — and
especially
your glorious legs — off limits. Rubbing them with spray and lotion wouldn’t make
you
ache with lust, so you get to do them.”

Choking on her beer, Lori laughingly coughed through it and echoed, “
Ache with lust?!

“Couldn’t think of a better way to put it.” Glancing down, I said, “Hell, just thinking about doing that stirred things up. Lori, I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t talk about me handling your legs unless you’ve decided you’re ready to be licked out of your mind.”

As expected, her widened eyes had fallen to the long lump in my jeans briefly, then — also as expected — she’d wrenched her eyes back up to mine. I knew she was remembering her reactions from the time she’d seen the thing snap up and salute her. Was that a blush? Prob’ly so. Hard to tell for all the other redness.

Chapter Two

 

Turning slightly away from her to adjust myself, I sat down and took a long swig of beer as I blatantly eyeballed her. Pretending to discover some leftover oil on my left hand, I wiped it on my pants and sighed, “Well, at least I got the scenic tour today.”

Lori goggled at me slightly, then a hearty chuckle bubbled out of her as she sat down and tried to sip her beer. She took a deep breath to organize herself, then took a sip of beer and swallowed before she chuckled again.

“I guess I’m just not used to hearing men say things like that. All day, every day, they’re on their best behavior at Carrington. I know they look, but they never say anything more than ‘you look great today’ or something like that.”

I chuckled, “Poor baby. That must be terrible for you.”

She shot me a grin. “Oh, not really. Not usually, anyway.” She shrugged. “Besides, all the best ones are already taken.”

“I’ll try to dig up some sympathy for you, sweetie. Are you sure you haven’t overlooked a few? Maybe two or three who’ve been hiding or something?”

Giving me a fisheye, she asked, “
Hiding?

“Hey, you know how unpredictable women can be, ma’am. All of a sudden she gets a certain look in her eye and a man has to wonder whether she’s gonna drag him back to her cave for a night of passionate lust or just kill him on the spot. It can be
real
hard to tell sometimes, y’know?”

“You are
so
full of shit. We aren’t like that at all.”

“Yeah? You’ve met Toni. Would you want to be the guy who saw her steaming toward him with an intent expression? You saw Agent Vicky flare up at that guy from Homeland, too. He was about two seconds from wetting himself when she backed off.” With a shrugging chuckle, I added, “But now they’re dating.”

Lori goggled at me with, “
OhMyGod! Really?!

“Yup. See what I mean? You were pretty sure she’d kill him if he opened his mouth again.” With a sigh, I opined, “Lemme tell ya, women can be scary critters.”

Apparently studying me, Lori asked, “Are you okay with that?”

Sipping my beer, I replied, “Yeah, sure. I can usually tell when they mean to kill me.”

Flicking sweat from her bottle at me, Lori laughed, “You
know
I meant about her dating that guy.”

Looking enlightened, I replied, “Ah. Yeah, that too, ma’am. We’d started finding reasons to steal time away from each other. Little bits of personal time. I’d accept an invitation to attend a Sheriff’s briefing and let that turn into schmoozing over drinks later with LT or Deputy Wendy and some of their team people. Vicky’d work late or stop by a mall on the way home or schedule an appointment in off time instead of force-fitting it into duty time. Stuff like that. We still had great times in the sack, but we both knew we weren’t too far from getting on each others’ nerves.”

Nibbling her lip, Lori almost tentatively asked, “Are you sure you aren’t just rationalizing things, Ed?”

“How does that fit with what you know about me, Lori? Her mom called the night her dad got hurt. Vicky’s phone was off, so I told her mom to keep trying and sent a probe to find her car. It was at a big shopping mall. I sent the probe through the mall and found her schmoozing with three friends in a restaurant instead of working late.”

“What did you do?”

With a shrug, I said, “I used the probe to turn on her phone.” Taking a sip, I said, “Tell me you haven’t sneaked some private time like that near the end of a relationship, ma’am. I’ll call you a liar right across this table. That night Vicky and I sat in the kitchen and talked after we got back from the hospital. The ‘new’ had worn off for both of us and she was up for promotion. We decided not to let things drag out and get difficult.”

“Have you dated anyone since?”

I chuckled, “Since what? The tenth grade? Dating is fake. It’s all masks and bullshit. If I want to know a woman, I just look for things we have in common and let her see the real me right up front.”

“What kind of things in common?”

“That doesn’t really matter. What matters is that we share them, whatever they might be.”

Lori grinned and chuckled, “Ed’s simplified rule for dating; ‘
Don’t Waste Time Dating
’.”

“You got it. Help her do something. Get to know her a bit. If she’s worth knowing,
then
wine and dine her.”

Lori laughed, “So logical. Yet you were sitting alone when I called.”

BOOK: 3rd World Products, Book 17
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