5 Nights (Sinful Delights Romance - Boxed Set) (64 page)

He wanted her to believe him, and knew that by sharing his own story, he might have a better chance. "Trust me Angela, I suffered at the hands of another person too, and it took me a long time to understand I wasn't the one to blame."  He had only talked about this with a counselor, but he knew instinctively she'd had no one to turn to.

"You were raped?" The thought of this proud, gorgeous, confident man having suffered made her angrier than her own experience.

After years of therapy, he had come to understand that what happened to him was a violation against him and not something he'd been responsible for.  "I was eighteen, and working at a piano bar in New Orleans.  I won't say I was a saint in those days Angela, to be honest I was so screwed up with drugs and alcohol that I was barely making it through each day.  Anyway, there was a producer who had come to my show one night and offered me a recording contract.  I was trying to prove to myself that I didn't need my daddy's label to make it in the music industry and he offered me the rainbow with the pot of gold at the end."

She sat back down beside him, listening to his story, and felt oddly at ease as he continued.

"Anyway, being strung out on drugs, he asked me to come to his hotel and discuss the contract, and before I knew his intentions he had tied me down to a bed and forced me."  The thought of that lecherous asshole touching him made him want to smash his face in.  "Instead of turning away from sex, I slept with so many females that I lost count just to prove to myself I wasn't gay."  He remembered the self-loathing he'd felt after that night and how many years it had taken him to get off the destructive path he'd allowed after the event.

"Did you turn him in," she couldn't imagine what it must have been like to have someone of the same sex rape her, and wondered if it could be any worse than it being someone you knew, like in her case.

"No, my father was on top of the recording industry at the time and instead of legal action we destroyed him together and made sure he never worked in the business again."  He often looked back and wondered if he wouldn't have been better off putting the sadistic fuck in jail where he belonged.

It was so much to take in, and she'd never spoken to another rape victim before.  "Wow," that was all she could manage because her head was spinning over his story.

"The truth is Angela, we can't help what happened to us in the past, but we can decide if we remain a victim for the rest of our life, or we overcome what they did to us."  It had taken several years for him to accept his past, and he hoped he could help her rise above what had happened in her young life.  For the first time in years he actually cared what happened to another person.

"Why would you have worried about being gay?" She knew digging into his life was none of her business, but a part of her was really curious now.

"After it happened I had all these nightmares about him, and one night I actually got off in the dream, so I was terrified it was something I actually wanted."  He knew that if anyone would understand what he'd been through she would, and it was ironically funny since he'd never discussed that with any other female.

"I guess people just react in their own way, I have the nightmares, but instead of wanting someone to touch me, the thought just makes me sick."  She'd actually read tons of stuff on the internet, trying to understand her own emotions after the abuse.  It was somewhat common for people to either become addicted to sex or celibate when something that horrific happened to them.

"Whatever helps you deal I guess is what you do to survive," he smiled warmly and for once the past wasn't such a terrible thing.  He'd turned down the offer to attend rape counseling group sessions, because he never wanted his secret to get out to the public, so it was a nice change being able to discuss this with a person outside of his counselor.  "Have you ever considered talking to a counselor?"  It had helped him so much, that he couldn't imagine having to go through it alone.

"I was able to afford a few sessions, but working as a waitress, that doesn't leave a lot of extra money for things like that," she gave an embarrassed laugh, realizing that they were from two completely different worlds.

"I guess I've never had to worry about money," he said apologetically.  Even when he was singing in dives, he had his mother's trust fund to fall back on for support.  "I can't imagine what it was like to live on the streets." He looked at her expectantly, wondering if he was pushing too much.

"Let's just say you don't want to find out," those dark weeks on the street was something she wouldn't wish on her worst enemy.  "You learn how to sleep without really resting."  That was putting it lightly, she thought, fearing for your life every second of the day was an experience no one should suffer.

"You know your family will find out you're doing this show unless they live under a rock Angela," he hated to bring up the bad news, but wanted her to be prepared in case they did find her.

The thought had never crossed her mind, but 'Overnight Sensation' was one of the most popular televised talent shows, and he was absolutely right.  The thought of him finding her was terrifying.  She hadn't talked to her mother since she left, and felt no guilt in stopping contact.  In her young mind, her mother should have known what was happening in her own home.  She failed to protect her and it was something she could never forgive.

"If you'll allow me, I'll run interference, I can be pretty persuasive in making people do what I want."  He gave a small smirk, showing a small glimpse of the attitude that earned him the title of Mr. Snarkiness in the tabloids.

"As far as I know they haven't cared enough to find me in the last five years, so until it becomes a problem I'd rather not encourage him."  The thought of having to face that monster again was something she'd give everything she had to avoid.

"Your call, but I will say sometimes it's better to head things off before they happen."  This was her choice, but he knew from personally experience that when a person was thrown into sudden fame that all the people in their past wanted to get in on the ride.

"I think you're doing enough already, Mr. Fitzgerald," she was amazed at how much better she felt about herself after her talk with him today.

"I think under the circumstances you can call me Nolan," he chuckled warmly, "and if it's okay I'll use your name as well, the Mr. and Ms. stuff was starting to get annoying."

"Okay Nolan, and of course I don't mind if you use my name." She found it funny that they were discussing such a normal topic after the bombshells they'd dropped on each other today.

"About your name..." he smiled playfully.  "I came up with an idea for a stage name yesterday and wanted to get your opinion, how about Angel Storm?"  The name really did fit this lovely woman and he hoped she approved because he saw tons of marketing ideas using it.

She liked the sound of the name and grinned enthusiastically.  "I think it's really cool!"  Her stomach growled at that precise moment, reminding her she hadn't eaten since lunch.

He chuckled at the sound, "Would you do me the honor of letting me take you out to dinner?"  They'd been talking for over an hour and he knew she'd probably want to rest soon to prepare for her training tomorrow.

"I don't know Nolan, wouldn't the papers have a field day with you taking one of the contestants out to eat?" She was only half-joking as she made the comment, but for personal reasons she didn't want to be center of rumors with him.

"Well I think if we keep it low key, and visit a pizza joint, the paparazzi might not get clued in."  The fact of him visiting anything but a five-star restaurant would definitely be off the radar, he knew.

The mention of pizza made her remember that her friends were ordering in tonight, "Crap I forget Lizzie and Devon were ordering pizza tonight, I really should be getting back to the hotel."

He was somewhat amazed at how much he didn't want her to leave tonight, but smiled in understanding.  "Far be it for me to keep you away from your pizza buddies," he laughed softly and stood up holding out his hand to help her stand.

Without thought she took his hand and let him help her, still smiling.  As they walked out to his limousine, she was still feeling happier than she could ever remember being before.  They chatted all the way back to the hotel, and as they finally arrived she impulsively reached over to hug him.  For reasons
she couldn't contemplate it felt normal, even though she was a little embarrassed by her actions.

He returned her hug, almost as shocked as she was, and without thought he lowered his lips to her cheek and kissed her tenderly.  "Thank you for an amazing night Angela," he smiled at the rosy blush on her cheeks.

Opening the car door she laughed softly and got out.  "I had fun," she waved and all but ran to the entrance of the hotel.  If anyone had told her last week she'd be spending time with Nolan Fitzgerald she would have laughed in their face, she thought as she hurried upstairs to meet Lizzy.

She was amazed at how much fun she had with Devon and Lizzy, and the other five they'd invited down to the lobby.  They'd downed enough Pizza and soda to make them sick and then practiced together until well after midnight.  When she finally crawled into bed she was given a peaceful night without the horrible nightmares that plagued her.

The week flew by with photo shoots, practices and her personal training with Nolan.  An entire weekend of relaxation was coming as soon as she finished her time with Nolan and she was somewhat excited to be able to enjoy some down time.  Walking into the studio she was filled with eager anticipation.  She really wasn't uncomfortable at all around him anymore and it was more than a relief to be able to enjoy his company.

He was sitting at his piano as she walked into the studio, and gave a warm smile as he lifted his aching fingers.  "How were the classes today?"  He already knew that the trainers were impressed with her improvement, but wanted to hear it from her lips.

"They are getting easier by the day thanks to you," she returned his smile, and sat her oversized purse down on the floor before joining him on the piano bench.  This was how they'd began their meeting for the last few days, him playing as she sang.

"You didn't bring your guitar," yesterday he'd discovered she'd left her guitar at home because she didn't know they'd be staying if they won the competition, so he'd given her one from the studio.

Smacking her forehead with the back of her hand playfully, she laughed.  "Sorry I was running late this afternoon and forgot it."

He chuckled at her antics, "Well I might forgive you this one time."  He began playing the latest song they were working on, and smiled as her incredible voice blended with the music.  Listening to her sultry lilts filled his soul with a longing he'd never felt before, and he lost himself in the magic they made.

She allowed the music to take over her mind, and sang of a lover that broke her heart, leaving her longing for the wonder they had shared so long ago.  When the last line ended, she watched in amazement as Nolan's talented fingers created the riveting melody to end the story in song.  "You should play more," she whispered softly, still enraptured in the moment.

His hands stilled on the keys, and he turned to face her, their faces scant inches apart.  "You make me want to play again Angela," without thought, he lowered her lips and found hers.  If she'd pulled away he could have stopped his hands from moving to either side of her face and pulling her closer, but she leaned closer and he was lost in the desire her sultry performance inspired.

The feel of his warm lips caressing hers forced a soft sigh to escape and when their tongues danced together, she was not afraid in the least, only wanting.  Wrapping her arms around his neck, she gave in to the beauty of his kiss, amazed at the tenderness this incredible man showered upon her.

Their pasts melted away for a few precious moments, and he surrendered to the ache that he'd felt all week while watching her become the star she would soon show the world.  Reality seeped in, and he broke the kiss, keeping his hands on her face as he searched her endless blue eyes, looking for regret, and thankfully finding none.  "You make me believe again, Angela," he spoke softly, his thumb moving across her swollen lips lightly.

Astonished by the emotion on his handsome face, she was amazed that she could be responsible for making this proud man feel anything.  She should be terrified, she reminded herself, but felt only contentment as he gently stroked her cheek with his long fingers.  "What are you doing to me Nolan," she whispered breathlessly, her eyes filled with a longing that she'd never felt before.

What was he doing, he thought to himself, forcing his hands to lower and pulling away.  She was this beautiful broken creature, and he wasn't a happily ever after kind of guy.  Standing up, he gave a small smirk, forcing back the gentle emotions she brought out in him.  He was here to help her succeed in her career, he forced his mind to accept,
and she was too good to fall for a cold-hearted bastard like himself.  "Forgive me, I'm afraid I got lost in the music."

The strange bond she felt while they kissed slowly raveled away with his cold behavior and she shivered. "I guess I did too," she knew there was no way a man like him could ever want a girl like her, but for a few moments it was nice to not be afraid.  Giving an embarrassed smile, she stood up and tried to get her emotions under control.

He felt like the ass he was, as he saw the self-doubt fill her beautiful face again, and hated himself for it.  "It just proves how far you're coming along," he knew the words were a damn lie as he said them, but she didn't need to get her heart broken by a man like him, he concluded.  Women in his life were decorations not long lasting commitments, and she deserved someone who would love her the way she deserved. 

Disappointed that he had only kissed her because she was performing well, she forced another smile to her face.  "I have a great teacher," she couldn't let him know how much it hurt to know he didn't really want her.

"Well I want you to shine when you perform," What he really wanted was to take her in his arms and drive away the insecurities that kept them both from giving each other a chance.  But his wants and needs weren't really important.  In a few weeks she would be performing against some of the best talent in the world, and he was determined that she outshine them all.  That didn't involve screwing her head up with fake promises that he could give her anything more than a few nights of passion. 

"Let's get back to work then," He didn't need to explain that she wasn't the type of woman for him, she could see it in his face.  So what if he was the first man in her life she actually
wanted to touch her.  He was giving her the chance to fulfill a dream, and that was so much more than she deserved.

Forcing his mind to get back into training mode, they worked on dance numbers for the rest of their session.  She had all the dance numbers down, and just needed to practice daily to improve her skills.  When he dropped her off at the hotel he felt like a piece of him was missing, and knew that putting some distance between them was the only way he could keep her safe from his own fucked up needs.

She had no idea who the real person was he hid from the rest of the world, or the things he needed to do with others to be able to make it through his fucked up life.  She was too good for him, and he'd never allow his deviant nature to hurt her.

He'd discovered after his abuse that he could only find pleasure when he was in complete control of his lover.  It had started innocently enough, tying a woman's hands to a bedpost while he fulfilled his needs, but escalated quickly in the need to do other things to show his power.  He'd discovered early on that older, more experienced woman were willing to allow him to play his little sex games  and most had begged to discover just how far he would take them  The ones that were offended were never invited into his bed again, and those that enjoyed his depraved acts still weren't kept as lovers for very long. With one exception, he allowed, the only female that could handle how screwed up he was, had been his friend for years.

He had sexual needs like any other man, so he found a way to fulfill those desires in a way that didn't involve a long lasting commitment.  It was for that reason that many considered him the cold-hearted bastard he was.  He never dated innocent women though, and the idea of some happily ever after didn't enter into his ideals for life.  He was upfront about his wants when a woman interested him, and either she was on board with the idea or he sent her packing.

Angela would never fall under the category of a woman he could find pleasure with, because he knew to have her, she needed a person who could truly love her.  Love was a foreign emotion to him, and she deserved a tender lover without all the fuck ups he had, he decided.  His body craved her, but his mind would never allow her to be hurt by his deviant needs. 

Picking up his cell phone, he knew what he needed to alleviate his tension.  She wouldn't ask questions, and would give him exactly what his depraved mind craved.  Tracy was a gorgeous woman, and one of the few that he knew he could call when his needs got out of hand.  She used him as easily as he used her, so they had an understanding.  Knowing she was married didn't matter to either of them.  Her marriage was one of power and greed, and the senator didn't care who she fucked as long as she was discreet.

Meeting Tracy's husband five years ago had been one of the strangest nights of his life. The Senator knew that his young wife was a very sexual person, and didn't begrudge her the lovers she wanted as long as his political career wasn't jeopardized.  He'd explained to Nolan that as long as they were discreet, they could even use his home when he was out of town to conduct their liaisons. 

Tracy was a born submissive and her husband suffered from impedance, but only a knowledgeable few knew that fact.  Some nights he had even watched as his wife was seduced.  In the beginning it had been strange for Nolan to share his deviant acts in front of another, but over the years he discovered his nights with Tracy were almost therapeutic.  She was the perfect escape for his sexual needs, and there was no worry about commitment.

After getting her approval, he gave his driver the address. Usually his mind was filled with excitement as he drove to meet her, tonight he was more melancholy.  Tracy would fulfill every sexual need he had, and until tonight that had been enough.  For reasons that he knew had to do with a sweet little diva, he just wanted to release the sexual frustration that had built up over his week of self-denial.  The nightmares stayed away as long as he continued to enjoy his little games, so he normally didn't go more than a few days without them.  After five days he could only hope that Tracy was ready for all his frustrations.

As they pulled up to her mansion, he knew she'd be waiting in their private little dungeon, kneeling and ready.  Her sleek body would be proudly on display in nothing but the diamond collar he'd given to her a few months after they agreed on this little arrangement.  As he made his way down the stairs he told his mind to focus on the woman he was here to dominate, and not the beautiful angel his body was longing for.

Walking to his submissive, he stroked her silken hair, as he allowed his eyes to roam over the perfection of her form.  She was every man's wet dream and he wished that his body was responding to the incredible vision she made kneeling on the cool tile of the floor, but he wasn't even in the least bit excited. 
Knowing what she needed, his fingers moved under the collar and pulled her to her feet with no tenderness.

Walking with determined strands, he led her to the cross, and expertly buckled her wrists and ankles into the smooth leather cuffs waiting for his arrival.  Her slim form was stretched perfectly, and he allowed his hand to run over the silky smooth skin of her back and then her softly rounded ass.  Not one blemish marred her gorgeous flesh, and he hoped that by adding some color to those twin moons he would feel some desire.

Leaving her attached to the cross, he walked over to a large wooden chest and pulled out a paddle.  It was one of her favorite toys, and he wanted her pleasure tonight, even if he found none in the act he was about to commit.  They rarely spoke in these sessions, and for once he was grateful for the silence.  With a perfection of skill he began warming her up with the paddle until she moaned for more and he allowed his strikes to become more forceful. 

Her back arched into every fall of the leather paddle and her cries of contentment gave him some small amount of satisfaction.  A splash of rose tint now covered her ass, and he still felt no arousal at the sight.  Frustrated at his inability to feel, he reigned down the strokes harder against her flesh until she cried out in distress.  Immediately stopping, he caressed the silken mounds, and whispered soft words of praise for her pain.

Releasing her wrists and ankles from their bonds, he pulled her into his arms to comfort her.  Normally he would take her after a paddling, but his body was just not in agreement tonight, so he walked her over to a large leather couch, arranged her body so her legs were splayed wide for his eyes, and walked back to the chest.  Removing a large dildo, he returned and pleasured her until she found release.

"Is everything alright Master," she whispered softly in respect, having never known him not to fuck her after a session. 

"Everything is fine, sweet girl, I'm afraid work is a little more stressful than usual this week and I'm not at my peak." Pulling the phallus from her clenching sex, he tossed it aside then pulled her into his arms, cuddling her.  He knew she would sterilize it after he left, and he needed to hold her to show that he cared about her well-being.

"Sir you know if you need to talk, I am always here for you," glancing up with a smile she idolized this beautiful man and never wanted him to feel burdened.

He caressed her hair and smiled warmly, knowing she would indeed be there for him no matter what he needed.  They had been friends for entirely too long for him not to be honest, so he decided to share his burden with her.  "I've met someone that I can't have," he gave a familiar smirk, and winked down into her smiling face.

"Surely there is no woman who could resist you Master?" Winking back, she couldn't imagine any female not worshipping his beautiful body.  He was tall, with broad shoulders, muscled in all the right ways, with a face that belonged on magazines, and hung like a Russian race horse.

"Your confidence in my appeal is overwhelming Tracy," he chuckled softly.  He was vain enough to know that most women found him handsome, but very few knew of the darkness that filled his mind.  "I could never share this lifestyle with her, I think it would destroy her."