A Family Affair - First Born (6 page)

Tom shouldn’t be the one apologizing. Memories of waking up next to Kane were flashing in Ellen’s mind - awful, wrong images. She wasn’t ready to tell Tom about her night. How could she explain something that her mind and body were still denying?

“You still seem upset, Ellen. Tell me how I can make this right.”

Ellen sipped the soup that Tom had put into her hand. “I guess there are just a lot of different things on my mind. It all just built up on me.” Ellen took a deep breath and tried to explain. “I like to pretend that I’m okay, but maybe things are bothering me more than I realise.”

“Like what?”

“Like the wedding preparations, Chloe’s death, the kidnapping, and the fact that Ted still hasn’t been caught.” It was a small lie as none of those things were actually bothering Ellen anymore. However, her reasons were plausible enough to distract Tom from interrogating her further.

“My poor, Elle. It’s fine for you to be still hurting over what happened last year. You don’t need to worry about telling me how you feel. You know, Hayden has some contacts in the police. I will ask him to find out about the investigation into Ted Blake’s whereabouts. I want to know why they haven’t caught him yet as well.”

Ted sat very still, his hands tightly clasped on the steering wheel in his parked car. He was outside a service station near the small rural town of Donald in regional Victoria. To the occasional farmer or townsperson who passed him, nothing looked out of the ordinary. He was just a man who had put petrol in his car, now taking a moment before driving away. But this was not an ordinary man in an ordinary situation. Ted was in the process of making a very important decision.

He had been keeping a low profile ever since he’d released the girl. The coppers were looking for him – there was no doubt, but their hounding of him was unfair. He hadn’t hurt Colleen’s daughter. He’d kept the girl only a week. They should all be thanking him for trying to stop it. A daughter marrying her own father was sickening.

But they weren’t thanking him, he knew. They wanted him back in jail, but they hadn’t caught him yet. He’d moved from town to town, taking odd jobs from the type of people who would be unlikely to dob him in. In fact, he was on the way to a shearing job two hundred kilometres further inland. The farmer was offering good money, as it was hard to get people to live in such an isolated place. Isolation suited Ted just fine at the moment.

It was a strange sensation to be sitting here in his car not moving. He had been in a hurry only minutes before. He’d been walking towards the counter to pay when he’d glanced at the rack of magazines and newspapers. The girl – Ellen, his Colleen’s daughter, was going to marry the makeup man. It was unbelievable. The newspaper’s front page announced it, so it must be true. How could the girl have decided to marry him? After everything he’d told her. It didn’t make sense.

There was a decision to be made here in this car, at this very moment. Ted could feel the importance of this decision rippling through his body. His decision would change lives.

One option was to forget the girl; to pretend she never existed, and keep driving towards the job. The other option was to turn the car around, drive to Melbourne and stop this sham of a wedding.

The second option was more risky of course as there were more coppers in the city. His picture was probably hanging in all their police stations. But the idea of the girl getting married was infuriating. She was acting as if everything was right in the world, as if Col hadn’t been murdered by the makeup guy.

Their wedding would be hard to ignore if he kept driving towards the shearing work. It would eat him up inside. Ted had to do something. He had to set things right once and for all. The newspaper people needed to know the truth.

He slammed his hands on the wheel in frustration and gritted his teeth. There was no choice for him, not really. He started the engine, reversed the car, and headed back in the direction he had come from. This farce of a wedding had to be stopped, one way or another.

Three weeks later and Ellen knew there was no denying it. Her period was late, and it was never late. Four days to be exact. The obvious couldn’t be denied any longer. Ellen grabbed sunglasses, a cap, her bag and coat, and headed for the nearest chemist.

“Please don’t be pregnant! Please don’t be pregnant!” she told her body.

She didn’t know if Kane had used protection on that one horrible night. It was such a hazy memory. She hadn’t seen him since leaving his apartment in shame the next morning, although he had started calling every day – sometimes twice per day. She never answered. Sooner or later she knew the calls would stop. He was going to get the message. Her night with him was a tragic mistake. It was Tom she loved, and as if to prove it to herself, she had no intention of ever seeing Kane again.

While in Switzerland, Tom had talked of the future that he saw for them as a couple. He wanted a family and for him and Ellen to raise happy and well-balanced children together in harmony. Ellen wanted to make him happy, but also to go to university. If she hadn’t met Tom, children probably wouldn’t have been a priority for some years. However, given his age and his desire to be a father, they had taken a relaxed approach to birth control. They had been so confident in their upcoming life together. It had been as if nothing could keep them apart. Given their attitude to birth control and the hazy memories associated with the night with Kane, the pregnancy could be either man’s. It was the worst case scenario.

Ellen purchased two pregnancy tests, and immediately went home, jogging most of the way. There was no time to waste. She grabbed a plastic cup from the kitchen and headed for the bathroom. The instructions were easy enough to follow.

The moisture climbed slowly along the test stick. Every second felt like a year, but she knew the results would be known within the minute. One line meant that she wasn’t pregnant. Two lines meant she was in big trouble.

The first line appeared and started to darken. The moisture kept climbing, and there it was. A second undeniable line appeared next to the first – initially faint, but gradually darkening. There was a new type of hormone in her body. She was pregnant.

Ellen’s mind instantly started to imagine how she was going to tell Tom. The whole truth would need to come out now. Her night with Kane was a horrible mistake which might ruin their lives as a result. How would he react? It was impossible to know. There was every chance that the wedding would be cancelled, but if so, it was his right to do so. Ellen would accept Tom’s decision regardless of what he chose to do. The worst part of this situation was not her own lost future, but the hurt that Tom would feel. His pain was now guaranteed, and Ellen herself was responsible. How would she look him in the eye and explain her betrayal?

The rest of the day passed slowly as Ellen stayed at home in her apartment and prepared her apology to Tom. No matter how many times she said the words out loud, they never sounded real. How could this have happened? Everything in their life had been going so well after the craziness of the previous year.

She repeated the pregnancy test after lunch but got the same result.

When Tom sent a text message saying that he was finished for the day and to come over for dinner, Ellen knew the inevitable could be delayed no longer.

She drove slowly to his house and parked near the garage. Tom’s butler, Robert, was working on something in the garage, and he waved. She waved back, ashamed to think how differently he would view her after this day.

Tom’s car was already there, and she knew he would be waiting for her inside. Ellen used her key to enter but left it on the sideboard near the front door. It was easier this way than being asked for its return down the track.

“Good evening, Ellen.”

Ellen jumped in surprise.

Tom’s housekeeper, Estella, was passing the front entrance on her way to the kitchen.

“Hi, Estella,” she said, trying to act normal.

“Will you be staying for dinner?”

Ellen shook her head, fighting back a vision of Tom throwing her out onto the street. “No. Please don’t prepare anything for me.”

“Let me know if you change your mind. Tom is in his office.”

“Thank you, Estella. Thank you for everything.” Ellen knew that might be the last time she would ever see Tom’s housekeeper again.

She took a deep breath, and resolved to tell Tom everything as quickly as possible. He was seated at his desk with his reading glasses on when she knocked.

His eyes lit up with an unexpected level of excitement. “Ellen, I’m glad you’re here. Perfect timing.” He ran towards her and kissed her on the lips. He was acting like a schoolboy.

Ellen knew she would never see that kind of happiness from him again. She reached for one of his hands, and squeezed it tight. “Tom. We need to talk. I need to tell you something important.”

Ellen realised that Tom was flapping a piece of paper in his hand. The excitement in his face was clearly not only because of her arrival. Something else was going on.

“Elle, wait. Let me show you something first.”

Ellen hardened her resolve. She should not get distracted. “Tom, I really need to tell you something first.”

“Please, Elle. You’re not going to believe this. I don’t know what to make of it.”

Maybe telling him in this moment was not such a good idea. It would ruin the excitement of whatever else was happening. A few more minutes shouldn’t matter. “Okay, Tom. You go first. What’s in your letter?”

“It’s from the Blood Bank.”

“You got a letter from the Blood Bank... Why would they...?”

“I’m registered on their bone marrow donor list.”

“Are you?” Ellen was surprised to hear that.

“Yes.”

“Huh.” She wondered why.

“One of Mum’s sisters needed a transplant years ago, and Dad and I were tested. Anyway, that’s not the point.”

“Sorry. Go on.”

“Apparently, I’m a suitable match for someone living in New South Wales.”

“Someone who is ill, you mean?”

“Yes.”

“And they want you to donate bone marrow to a stranger? That is something for you to think about, I guess.” Ellen wondered how much pain and effort was required to donate bone marrow, as she really knew nothing about it.

“Wait, there’s more,” said Tom excitedly. “They have indicated that both my brother and I are suitable donors. It says they have written to my brother also, and they want to encourage one of us to donate.”

“But you don’t have a brother.”

“Exactly.”

“What? I don’t understand.” Ellen was thoughtful. “Obviously this is a mistake.”

“I suppose so.” Tom seemed disappointed to say so.

“What do you mean – you suppose so? Of course it
must
be an error.”

“Maybe my dad had an affair?”

“You think Jack had an affair which produced a son?”

“It’s possible.”

“Margaret would have told you.” Ellen couldn’t imagine Margaret keeping a secret like that.

“Maybe Mum doesn’t know about either the affair or the child.”

Tom had obviously already put a lot of thought into this idea. “That’s a lot of maybes, Tom.”

“I’m going to show the letter to my parents.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

“You know I’ve wanted a brother. If there’s any chance that this is true, I need to know.”

Ellen could imagine the conversation between Tom and his parents. It reminded her of the time when she confronted her own parents about her adoption. It wouldn’t be easy for any of them.

“Elle, I know this is a lot to ask. But I really want to investigate this matter now. It can’t wait. The wedding will still be my number one priority, but this matter will be a close second. Is that okay with you? I wanted to check with you before I do anything.”

Ellen was surprised and shocked by the turn of events but managed to mumble, “Of course.”

“I will really need your support to follow this through. I won’t be able to do it without you.”

Ellen thought through what she had come here to tell him. This wasn’t the right time, but she couldn’t put it off forever. “I love you, Tom. You know that.”

“I love you too. Does that mean you’ll support me?”

“Yes, I’ll support you through this.” How could she do anything else? This was the man she loved.

“That means everything to me. Now, sorry – what did you want to talk about?”

Ellen hesitated. She tried to think of something else to say, but nothing came to hand. “Oh, it doesn’t matter now.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, it was just a wedding thing. I might talk to our planner tomorrow first, before I raise it with you.”

“Well, just so you know - whatever you want is fine with me. Just tell the planner and she will make it happen.”

Ellen smiled even though there was worry in her heart. “Thanks, Tom.”