A Family Affair - First Born (5 page)

A few hours later, Ellen awoke, unsure of where she was. It was so dark. Her head was heavy and hazy, and she couldn’t remember going to bed. Was she at Tom’s house? It was hard to breathe properly and even harder to open her eyes. What was going on? She’d never felt so confused. Where was Tom?

“I need you, Tom,” she called out. “Are you there?” There was no answer. “Baby, I need you. Are you there?”

Before long, warm arms encircled her and kissed her. Tom had a way of making everything feel better. He carried her to his bedroom, and before long she was warm and secure in his welcome embrace. Her head was still so heavy, but she fell deeply into a peaceful sleep this time.

Kane watched every movement Ellen made. She was still asleep even though the sun had risen half an hour ago. Its light streamed through the window bathing his bedroom in a beautiful glow. It was the most perfect morning of his life.

Ever since learning of his adoption as a young boy, Kane had struggled with the feeling that he did not belong in this world; he did not belong to anyone. Yes, his adoptive parents had always said they loved him, and they seemed sincere, but he did not truly belong to them. The fact that his birth parents gave him away was so hard to deal with. He had worked hard to make a life for himself, and to make them proud, but deep down the feelings had never been overcome. Until now, that is.

As he watched Ellen, he realised that he did belong in this world. He belonged to her. The old feelings were like a dream from the past. He tried to recall them, but they faded into the background of his mind. How could he not have seen it until now? She belonged to him in the same way. Their bodies bonded perfectly last night. Ellen had called to him in the night, and allowed him to comfort her. One thing had led to another and they had kissed and made love. She hadn’t pushed him away. In fact, she had encouraged him. Maybe she had come to her senses, realising that Tom was too old for her. It was true that he didn’t have as much money as Tom, but he owned his apartment, and he would work hard to provide her with everything else she needed.

It had not been easy to be Ellen’s personal trainer over the past three months. Being so close to her every day, but not being allowed to touch her. He had wanted to kiss her so many times in the gym. The only thing that had stopped him was her constant talk of Tom. Tom this... Tom that... It had been aggravating, but the time for being denied and pushed away was over. Ellen was now his to keep. She was naked in his bed, and so beautiful. She had chosen him over Tom. What a fool that man must be, Kane thought. He’d taken another woman on a date while engaged to Ellen. Kane would never hurt her that way. There would only be room for one woman in his life.

She was as beautiful in the morning as she was in the magazines, of which he had collected numerous. Her soft hair fanned her angelic face. As she was naked under his bed covers, he wished she would roll over so he could see the curves of her breasts again.

Suddenly Ellen stirred, and groggily opened her eyes, catching him in the act of watching her. Her eyes seemed confused, as if her brain was struggling to catch-up.

“Morning, Elle,” Kane said, with concern. “I’m so happy you are awake. How about I make you breakfast in bed?”

“Where am I?”

“My place, silly.”

Ellen lifted the covers. “I’m naked under here.”

“I know.”

“Why am I naked? Naked... at your house?”

Kane wondered why she was looking so confused. She shouldn’t be looking at him in that way, not after last night. “I’ll make us some coffee.” He slid out of the bed and headed for the kitchen.

“Did we?”

It was a strange question. She had called to him in the night. She should remember what they did. He would never forget. He couldn’t answer her.

“We didn’t...”

Kane was disappointed in her attitude which was destroying his happy buzz from earlier. From the kitchen, Kane could hear her moving about frantically, obviously looking for her clothes. He gave her a few seconds and went back to check that she was okay. “Hey, where are you going?” he asked.

Ellen was fully dressed and heading for the door. “Did you drug me or something?” she asked angrily.

“What?” Why would she say that? Kane’s head was starting to spin.

“I don’t remember anything.”

How could she not remember the most beautiful night of his life? “You don’t remember anything? You don’t remember being with me?” he asked sadly.

“Well, did you drug me?”

“Of course not! How could you say something like that to me?” Kane’s heart was breaking with every word that came out of her mouth. Couldn’t she see how much he loved her? “Ellen, I would never hurt you. I care about you too much.”

“What happened then?”

“Come and sit down, please. Have the coffee I just made for you.”

“No, thanks.”

Kane felt disappointment ripple through his body. She was looking at the coffee with suspicion. Did she think he had spiked it or something? He pushed those feelings aside and put the coffees down. If she didn’t want coffee she didn’t have to have it. He tried to explain, “You were upset because Tom went on a date. We had a couple of drinks. I comforted you. You took a sleeping tablet to help you sleep.”

Ellen looked upwards. “I think I remember that.”

“Right. That’s good. Keep trying to remember.”

“And then...? How did I end up in your bed?”

“You called out for me in the night. I came to check on you, and you started kissing me.”

Ellen looked horrified to hear that she started kissing him. “Why didn’t you resist? I didn’t know it was you. The sleeping pill must have reacted with the wine somehow...”

“I tried to walk away from you, but you followed me back into my bedroom. I thought you wanted me too.” Kane shook his head. “I love you, Ellen. I see now that we belong together. I’m not going to pretend otherwise anymore. I want to love you again, every night. I’ve felt this way ever since we met. I’m not going to fight you off, as if you mean nothing to me.”

“You know I don’t feel the same. I could never love you.” The look in her eyes told Kane that she meant it.

“But he cheated on you. He is too old for you to be with.”

“Nonsense.” Ellen looked at him with anger and disgust written all over her face. “I can’t see you again. I can’t believe what seems to have happened. Please don’t tell anyone. This shouldn’t have happened.” Ellen was walking towards his door and he saw that she was shaking.

“I’ll call you. We can talk about this later on.” Kane couldn’t believe that she was really leaving.

“No. Don’t call me. Ever again.”

Waves of shame and regret rolled through Ellen as she left Kane’s apartment on foot. She had left with only one shoe on, in a bid to get out of there as quickly as possible. The alcohol and sleeping pill had created a hung-over drowsy feeling in her, but luckily her mind was clearing rapidly. The fresh air must have been helping too. Tom would have a reasonable explanation for his dinner date last night. It was her who had betrayed his trust.

Remembering that her phone was off, she found it in her handbag switched it on. Three missed calls from Tom, and two text messages.

Hey Elle. You’ve got your phone off, I guess. Call me when u r free. Xox

Going to bed now zzz. Hope the dress fitting was fantastic. Can’t wait until big day. Love you. T xox

Ellen’s phone started ringing once she was finished reading the message from last night. It was Tom.

“Hi,” she said, answering.

“Hey, your phone’s back on.”

“Sorry. I forgot it was off.”

Tom laughed. “That’s not like you. How was the fitting? I’m dying to hear about it.”

“Postponed. The designer was sick.”

“Oh, no. If I’d known I would have come over. What did you get up to then?”

Ellen paused. This was definitely not a conversation to have over the phone. “Listen, I’m not feeling too well.”

“That’s not good. I was going to see if you wanted to meet for breakfast.”

“Are you free later on?”

“Of course. Wait a sec.” Ellen guessed Tom was checking his calendar, as the line went quiet. “I can pop over after eleven. Will you be home?”

“Yes.”

“Can I bring you anything?”

All Ellen wanted in this moment was to relive the past twenty-four hours again, and to do things differently. Maybe Panadol and coffee were a close second place, but she herself could find those things. “No, thanks. I’ll be fine.”

“I missed you last night. I’ll see you soon.” He seemed sincere.

Ellen was feeling very silly all of a sudden for the way she had reacted. She checked her watch. It was a little past seven o’clock. The sun was up but its rays offered her no warmth. Her heart was cold and afraid.

Normally she would be up at this time of day and preparing for a workout. How had everything gone wrong so quickly? She would need at least a couple of hours to freshen up, and could only imagine how bad she looked at the moment.

When Tom arrived after eleven as promised, Ellen had scrubbed her skin to remove any trace of Kane’s touch, cleaned her teeth thoroughly and drank three coffees. She was alert and focussed, and ready to hear Tom’s version of events without jumping to any conclusions this time. She was definitely not ready to talk about what had happened with Kane. She herself didn’t understand it yet.

He kissed her softly on the cheek, while looking quite worried. “How are you feeling?” Ellen was about to answer when he revealed a takeaway container which smelled of hot soup. “It’s chicken noodle.”

She smiled, trying to look pleased. Eating was the last thing on her mind. “Thank you. Now that you’re here, I’m feeling better.” Being around Tom helped her forget about the past twenty-four hours. It was starting to seem like a bad dream.

“I had a missed call from you last night. I had my phone off too for a short while.”

This was Ellen’s chance. “What were you doing?”

“Just business.”

Ellen’s heart sunk. It certainly hadn’t been business that she saw. Why wasn’t he telling her the truth?

“What’s wrong, Elle?” He could read her so well.

“Elizabeth told me about your restaurant booking. I dropped in and I saw you...” She said the words slowly, trying to find meaning in what she had seen.

“Oh.”

“You were out with a woman, who was pretty and well dressed. It didn’t look like business.”

“You’re not thinking...” Tom seemed surprised with their conversation. “I would never do what you’re thinking, you know.”

“What was going on then?”

“I can’t believe you are asking me this.”

Ellen didn’t say anything, hoping he would continue explaining.

“Well, it was going to be a surprise.” Tom took a deep breath and looked disappointed. “I can see from your expression that I’m going to have to tell you.”

Ellen’s eyes dropped to the ground. It was hard to look at someone when accusing them of betraying you. “I’m sorry for asking,” she whispered.

“Last week, I rang some contacts in order to meet Nikki Lucas – the singer. She is the lead singer of the
Blue Roses
. Remember, we heard that song while shopping last week. You said you liked it.”

Ellen remembered of course but hadn’t thought Tom was paying attention to her comment.

“Anyway, she agreed to meet me for drinks. I asked her to perform at our reception, Elle. Just her, not the band. I can assure you it was definitely not a date. I wanted her performance to be a surprise for you; something magical for our first dance as husband and wife. Nikki and I ordered drinks and because she was hungry, I ordered a shared entrée. She had to meet someone at eight, so we didn’t stay there long. I was talking about you most of the time, you know.”

“Oh.”

“You should have joined us if you were there. I can’t believe you don’t trust me?”

Ellen felt the tears starting to form, as his accusatory tone echoed in her head. “I guess it just makes more sense,” she softly explained.

“What does?”

“You being with a famous singer. When I saw the two of you, it just looked right, you know.”

Tom pulled Ellen’s hand towards the sofa, and they both sat down next to each other. “No, I don’t know that. I obviously need to show you exactly what you mean to me. It’s clear that you have no idea. I’ve spent years dating different women – some of them exactly like Nikki. None of them have ever meant to me what you meant from the very first moment I saw you. From that second, you understand, you changed something in me. I’m not going to throw away our relationship for another woman. It’s almost absurd that you are feeling insecure.” Tom shook his head. “If only you could see the situation from my perspective, you would understand. Forgive me, Ellen, for what happened with Chloe, and for not showing you what you mean to me. Let me make it up to you. You’ll never feel insecure again, I promise.”