A Fate Worse Than Death (13 page)

“Do you know who these people are that took over the operation?” I asked.

“No idea,” he replied. “You know me. I just do what I’m told, no questions asked. Now are we going to finish this game or not?”

I looked at the table. The only ball that had gone near any of the pockets was the white one. “I really don’t see any point.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” said Bully. “Anyway, this dump is dead. I think it’s time you and me split. I know a rocking little place around the corner. If we’re quick enough, we may still be able to catch some action.”

“I think I’ve had enough action for one day, Bully. I need a rest.”

“Okay, suit yourself.”

We walked back through another quickly-cleared path towards the door. As we left the club, I couldn’t help noticing the band finally returning to the stage.

Back out in the street, Bully turned to me, handed back the bottle, and grinned.

“It was good to see you again, Jimmy. And thanks for the drink. I hope the information I gave you was helpful.”

“So do I, Bully,” I said. “So do I.”

“So, I guess I’ll see you round.”

“I can’t make any promises.”

“Well, good luck anyway.” He turned and began walking quickly up the street.

“Good luck to you too, Bully,” I said. It felt strange wishing good luck to the guy who had shot me down. But I guess when you share a drink and shoot some pool with them afterwards, it puts everything into a different perspective.

I began walking the other way, pondering the new information I’d received. They say dead men tell no tales, but Bully had told me plenty. After our conversation, the plot hadn’t just thickened—it had congealed. I needed a place where I could think in peace, but more importantly, I needed somewhere I could sleep. It had been a long day and I was absolutely exhausted.

My plan was to return to the warehouse at the end of the alley where I’d first arrived, so I could have a brief lie-down on the mattress Jessie had left behind. Unfortunately, there turned out to be so many dark side alleys that finding the right one was virtually impossible. After a while, I gave up trying and decided that the first unlocked door I could find would provide sufficient sanctuary.

I turned into the next alley, but I hadn’t taken more than a couple of steps before I began to get that feeling when you know you aren’t alone. I turned to see a large shadow blocking the end of the alley. From out of the shadow, a voice hissed.

“This is what happens to people who stick their noses in places they don’t belong.”

The shadow split into five smaller but still significant shadows. Closer and closer they advanced, rapidly cutting off all of my light. For a fraction of a second, there was pain, and then my whole world became nothing but a shadow.

I WOKE
UP
.
I WAS LYING ON A HARD BED
, with a head that felt as if it had recently become acquainted with a very large rock. Too weak to even consider opening my eyes, the most I could manage was to let out a low groan.

“Just try to relax,” said a voice I had no trouble recognising. It was a soothing melody, a soft light in the heavy darkness.

“Angel,” I said. “Am I back in Heaven?”

Jessie laughed. A bitter, mirthless laugh. “Open your eyes and tell me if this looks like Heaven.”

I opened my eyes. I was in a small room. The walls initially appeared to be covered with brown, patterned wallpaper, but a closer inspection revealed that it was actually a swirling mix of grot and grime. Tatty olive carpet covered the floor, and the only furniture apart from the bed I was lying on were a table and a couple of chairs that looked as if they’d been carefully crafted from scrap timber and splinters. Jessie stood beside the table, a joyless smile on her face.

“This isn’t Heaven,” I said.

Jessie shook her head.

“I’m still in Hell.”

Jessie nodded. “I found you lying face down in an alley and I brought you here. What happened to you?”

“I’ve been spending my time getting to know the locals, but it seems they’re not so keen on getting to know me.”

Jessie sighed. “I tried to warn you, Jimmy. I tried to let you know that Hell is worse than you could have possibly imagined. How do you feel?”

“As good as anyone would feel if they’d just received a back massage from a steamroller. But why are you here? You’re not telling me that—”

“Yes, I’m afraid I am. Sally discovered who I was and made sure everybody in Heaven knew about it. So I’ve been sent back here to serve my penance.”

“I’m really sorry,” I said, feeling uncomfortably like someone trying to cheer up a friend after their grandmother died.

“I guess it was bound to happen eventually. There’s only so long you can keep someone like Sally fooled.”

At the mention of Sally’s name, I couldn’t help thinking of my last encounter with Jessie. I’d had lipstick on my face and a semi-clothed Sally draped around me. Despite everything I’d said to Jessie, I had a horrible feeling she figured I was the one who had turned her in.

“Please trust me, Angel,” I said. “It wasn’t me.”

“It’s a little difficult for me to trust anyone at the moment.” Jessie sat down and buried her head in her hands.

“But you’ve got to believe me. I don’t know how Sally found out, but I promise you I didn’t tell her anything.”

She looked up again. “You don’t have to worry, I know it wasn’t you. It was actually an unfortunate accident that gave me away.”

“What happened?”

“My batteries went flat.” For a moment, Jessie looked almost embarrassed. Then she frowned again. “As for you and Sally, I guess that’s none of my business. I can see why a man like you would be attracted to someone like her.”

I started to laugh, but protests from my body stopped me mid-guffaw. “If you’d only stayed another minute, you would have been seen me pick Sally up and throw her out on the street.”

“You threw Sally out on the street?”

“Dumped her like a broker dumping stock in a bear market.”

Jessie almost smiled at that. “How did she take it?”

“Not well, I’m afraid. Apparently, as far as she’s concerned, I’m about as welcome in Heaven as the bubonic plague.”

“You’re right, I wish I had stayed to see it.” Jessie paused. The smile that had flirted with the idea of appearing on her face clearly thought the better of it. “You’re a brave man to take her on, but it looks like she’s not going to let you have the last laugh.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“Isn’t it obvious? Just look at you.”

“So I got beat up by a local gang. It could have happened to anyone.”

“Come on, Jimmy, you’re not that naive. You don’t think this happened purely by chance.”

Jessie was right. Who was I kidding? This had definitely not been a random attack. Those thugs, whoever they were, knew exactly who they were targeting. And the fact that Sally had some serious connections within the underworld was as clear as a teenager’s skin wasn’t.

“Okay,” I said, “so Sally and the Devil are hatching something, but for what purpose? Sally seems pretty comfortable as it is. She’s got her mansion on the hill, and she’s got God practically eating out of her hands. What else could she possibly have to gain?”

“I don’t know,” said Jessie, “and to tell you the truth, I don’t want to know. I’m in enough trouble as it is, and I’m damned if I’m going to get embroiled any further.”

“Seems to me you’re already damned.”

“That’s not funny.”

“I’m sorry. I’m not usually at my funniest straight after I’ve been beaten up. I’m usually much funnier while they’re doing the beating.”

“I assume from that comment that you’re starting to feel a little better.”

“I feel well enough to eat a horse.”

“Then perhaps I can get you some breakfast?” She stood up and walked towards the door.

“Please do. But before you bring it out, can you do me one favour?”

Jessie stopped and turned to me. “What would you like?”

“Whatever you bring me, mash it up just a little. I think I’m going to have to drink it through a straw.”

Jessie chuckled and then disappeared through the door. While she was gone, I finally managed to sit up, and by the time she returned, I had made the momentous journey from the bed to one of the chairs.

Jessie placed a bowl on the table in front of me and handed me a spoon. I dipped the spoon into the thick brown sludge in the bowl, took a mouthful, and then spat it straight back out again. I’d never actually eaten mud before, but I was sure it would have tasted like nouvelle cuisine compared to what had just passed my lips.

“What in God’s name is this supposed to be?” I gasped.

“You don’t like cereal?”

“I didn’t realise ‘cereal’ was the word for toxic slime here in Hell.”

“That mediocre food up in Heaven isn’t looking quite so bad now, is it.”

“Come on,” I protested, “you can’t tell me there isn’t good food in Hell. I’ve seen some of the restaurants down here.”

“There’s plenty of good food in Hell,” Jessie agreed. “It’s just practically impossible to eat any of it.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, first of all, you’ve got to be able to afford it. And secondly, even if by some chance you do manage to get enough money, you’ll probably find they’ve run out of the ingredients for the dish you want to order, or the chef has taken the day off, or they just don’t feel like cooking it.” Jessie paused and looked at me with a strange, cock-eyed grin. “But I shouldn’t have to tell you any of this. You’ve been in Hell for a while now. So, how are you enjoying it?”

I put the spoon down and pushed the bowl away. “When I first got here, I thought it was great. Here I was expecting fire and torment, but what did I find instead? Streets full of people. Bars and nightclubs playing music till the early hours.”

“But did you actually get into one of those nightclubs to hear some of the music?”

“No I didn’t. Well, I got into a club, but the band left the stage straight away.”

“Exactly,” said Jessie. “The band always takes a break whenever you go into a club. And they always come back just as you’re leaving. You never actually get to hear them play.”

“But what about all the people who were in the club when I arrived? They would have heard them play.”

“That’s right, the other people would have. Good stuff only ever happens to other people in Hell. When you go to the movies in Hell, the ticket office always sells out just as you reach the front of the queue. When you go into a bar, you always leave by yourself, even though everyone else seems to be leaving in pairs.”

“Come on,” I said. “I’ve had a bad night, but you still can’t convince me Hell is so terrible. With the attitude you’ve got at the moment, I’ll bet the Garden of Eden would look like a cesspit. By the way, I don’t suppose you’ve got a cigarette? Suddenly I’ve got a real craving.”

“It wouldn’t help if I did. The cigarettes in Hell don’t satisfy the craving. They only make it worse. But tell me something, Jimmy. Did you have that craving while you were up in Heaven?”

Of all the things that Jessie had said, this was the one that really floored me. She was absolutely right. Even when I’d thought about cadging a cigarette from God, it hadn’t been a pressing need. I hadn’t even been that upset when I’d found out He’d given them up.

Jessie must have noticed the sudden glint of madness in my eyes, because she gave me a knowing smirk. “It’s starting to hit home, isn’t it. You’re starting to see how Hell really is. Everything here goes wrong. Absolutely everything.”

“Hang on a minute,” I interjected. “Not everything went wrong. I not only succeeded in making an ally out of my old enemy Bully Malone, but I actually got a lot of information from him about . . . damn!”

“What’s the matter?”

“I wanted to get information about Sally and her connections here, but I completely forgot to ask.”

“No,” said Jessie with unexpected fierceness. “You didn’t forget. It’s just the way it works down here. As long as you’re in Hell, you’ll never be able to get what you want. Hell is constant craving and constant disappointment. In Hell, you can never be satisfied, no matter how hard you try. There’s never any time for rest or peace. You’re forever rushing around, desperately searching for the one thing you think will bring fulfillment. But even if you find it, it’s never enough. It never fills that burning, gaping hole inside your soul. That’s what it’s like here in Hell.”

As Jessie finished her diatribe, she pounded her fist on the table. The force of the blow sent the bowl flying into the air, raining thick brown sludge all over her.

I grabbed what looked like an old piece of cloth that was lying on another chair and tried to wipe her down. Immediately, she screamed and reached out to grab the cloth from my hand.

“Keep still, Angel,” I said. “I’m trying to clean you up.”

“Stop it,” she cried, still clawing blindly for the cloth.

I stepped back. “Take it easy. Even in Hell, I don’t think a face full of toxic slime is a good look.”

“You don’t understand. I have to wear that.”

“This?” I held up the cloth. Underneath the grunge that had been smeared all over it, it appeared to be some sort of body stocking. “Why do you have to wear this?”

“I told you before I had a penance to serve.”

“Wearing this is your punishment for sneaking into Heaven?”

“It’s worse than that,” Jessie sighed. “I have to go out into the street looking like this. I have to do a mime performance.”

“A mime performance here? Out on the streets of Hell?”

Jessie nodded sadly.

“Ouch,” I groaned. “That’s cruel and unusual punishment.” I shut my eyes, trying to hold back an image of Jessie in her filthy bodystocking, walking against the wind out on the busy streets of Hell. It wasn’t working. Suddenly, this room was starting to get awfully claustrophobic. I had to get out.

“I’d love to stay and watch your performance,” I said, “but I’ve got to get going. There’s still plenty of work for me to do here.”

“You’ll come back though, won’t you?” said Jessie, her eyes big and round beneath the layers of caked-on cereal. “I’ll be here, waiting for you.”

“I’ll do what I can, Angel. This case is starting to get awfully complicated. And if what you’ve said is right, I’ve got to watch my back. But whatever happens, just remember I’ll be thinking about you.”

“I’ll be thinking about you too, Jimmy.”

I walked through the door, trying my best not to think about her. Of course, I banged my head on the way out.

It was daytime in Hell, but there wasn’t a lot of sunshine creeping through the clouds. A light drizzle was falling as I made my way through the gloom of another side alley, back towards the main street.

In the cold light of day, the main street of Hell didn’t scrub up so well. What had seemed bright and exciting at night now seemed faded and tired. The music that still thumped from the bars sounded atonal and jarring, while the neon signs glowed feebly, barely illuminating the dimness all around.

There was less foot traffic than the previous night, but it was still pretty busy. I walked slowly through the crowd, quietly observing the faces that suddenly didn’t seem to be quite so becoming. There were the women whose lipstick and powder couldn’t disguise their thin mouths and dry, lined skin. There were the young stallions with their clinking jewellery, thrusting out their chests and shoulders but impressing no one but themselves. There were the old drunks in faded dinner jackets, dancing to the music of parties that had long since ended. In all of their eyes, I could see a look that I might once have taken for purpose and determination, but which now looked a lot more like futile desperation.

I trudged along the street, stepping in every puddle along the way, until I arrived back at the Devil’s castle. Even that didn’t seem to be quite so imposing. It was neither as black nor as solidly threatening as I’d remembered it from the night before.

I stood for a moment, examining the gruesome door buzzer. The business I had today was a little too private for me to be ringing the front doorbell. I looked around. On either side of the door, a series of open windows gaped darkly like a row of demons’ jaws hungry for food. It seemed that security here was more than a little lax, though I could understand why. Who could possibly be foolhardy enough to consider breaking into the Prince of Darkness’s stronghold? Only one person I could think of.

I racked my brain trying to remember the position of the side door I’d seen Sid scurrying into the night before, then counted across the windows on the left side to see if I could match window with door. Once I’d made my selection, I hoisted myself up and through the window, and immediately discovered my calculations were hopelessly wrong.

Instead, I found myself in what appeared to be a tearoom. There was a counter with a kettle, a toaster, and a griller. There was also another person in the room.
Click
went the kettle as that other person switched it on.