A Love to Last Forever (38 page)

A fire, of course, would never be welcome, no matter the timing. Still, it wasn’t the fire and destruction that preoccupied Beth’s thoughts as much as the way her husband might decide to resolve the situation.

“You know, you and your family are welcome here as long as you like,” Hank said, looking to Gwen. She nodded and waited for Hank to continue. “We can even help you rebuild a corral and shelter for the horses while you stay with us. That way you can at least keep up with the stage.”

“That’s so kind of you,” Beth said in a barely audible voice. She was afraid to say too much, for fear it might cause Nick to reject the idea. She didn’t know him well enough, even now, to be able to anticipate his reaction to this situation.

“You’re family,” Hank stated. “Look, I know this is devastating, but I’ll lend you whatever you need to get through. It might not be wise to rebuild everything, what with the town’s existence being so questionable, but we can do enough to allow you to continue to earn a living. I can also get additional blacksmith supplies.”

Nick finally put his coffee cup down. “I don’t have any way to pay for such things. We were barely able to meet all our needs on the stage salary as it was. The side jobs from the various ranchers helped keep things running smoothly, but it won’t be enough to rebuild—not with winter coming on.”

“But surely if we stay here,” Beth put in, “I can work at Gallatin House and earn some money. That would help us rebuild.”

Nick frowned. “I won’t have this family be dependent on you working a job. I’m the man of the house, and I will see to my family’s needs.”

“But sometimes,” Hank countered, “we have to turn to others for help.”

“That’s right,” Gwen added. “The Bible says we’re to bear one another’s burdens. That’s what being a family is all about.”

Beth looked at Nick. “Everyone knows you’ve always worked hard and can provide for your family. Don’t let your pride get the best of you. Things will come back around. We can rebuild in time.” She tried to sound as encouraging as she could, hoping against all hope that he wouldn’t consider any other possibility.

“If the town is going to be relocated anyway,” Nick said after a few moments of silence, “then there’s no reason to rebuild.”

“That is a valid point.” Hank put down his fork. “In fact, maybe it helps to make the decision that much easier. I’ve asked Adrian Murphy to wire his superiors and get us an exact location and availability of land that the Northern Pacific has for sale. Once he gets back to us, we’ll know better. You could relocate the shop and secure the stage contract by building near the rail line.”

Nick shook his head. “I’m not talking about relocating to the railroad or rebuilding, for that matter. Simon wrote and told me he could easily get me a job with the railroad in Tacoma. I see now that letter must have come for a reason—especially since the fire destroyed everything that would keep me here.”

Beth found she couldn’t take any more of the conversation. “If you’ll excuse me,” she said, getting up quickly. She hurried from the room and fled the house.

Without thought as to how it might look, she hiked her blue skirt and ran down the road in the direction of the cemetery. If someone had seen her, they might have thought she were being pursued by a bear or a highwayman, but Beth ran from something entirely different. Unfortunately, her heartbreak seemed to keep perfect pace with her, meeting her face-to-face when she finally came to halt at her father’s grave.

“Why does this have to happen?” she asked, staring at the small headstone that bore her father’s name. “Why now? Why in this way? Why . . . when I finally had all the things I’d dreamed of?” She buried her face in her hands and began to cry.

Falling to her knees, Beth longed for the comfort of her husband. If only Nick would come to her and tell her it was all a mistake—that he would never want her to be unhappy and therefore would never force her to leave all that she loved.

But instead of Nick’s embrace, Beth found herself wrapped in her sister’s arms. She recognized Gwen’s perfume without even looking up. For several minutes, Gwen said nothing. She just held Beth close and let her cry. Beth remembered times when she’d been much younger that Gwen had done much the same.

“I can’t do this,” Beth finally managed to say.

“I kept thinking of what you had confessed to us—your relief when Pa died, because you didn’t want him to move us again. Now Nick speaks of leaving, and I know it must pierce your heart with many sorrows.”

Beth looked up and nodded. “I don’t want to go. I don’t want things to change.”

“But they
have
changed, Beth. You married. You left Gal-latin House for a home of your own. Now that home has been destroyed, but your family is still very much in place. Your husband and son need you.”

“But I have needs, too,” she said, sniffing back tears.

Gwen relaxed her hold on Beth and eased off her knees to sit on the ground. “Sometimes needs are based on illusions and false understandings.”

“What are you saying?” Beth asked. “That I don’t know what I want? That I’m not really sick and tired of moving from place to place—that it’s an illusion and not a real problem?”

Gwen lowered her gaze and shook her head. “I know it’s real to you. But, Beth, your marriage is more important than the place you live. You made a commitment to Nick—a commitment to be obedient and to trust him for the future. You promised to love him until death separated you. Are you willing to just cast that promise aside?”

Beth considered Gwen’s words. Was she willing to walk away from Nick and the marriage—from Justin and her motherhood—just because they might find it necessary to relocate?

For a long moment, Beth wasn’t sure what to say. The fact was, she could see herself doing it, and that frightened her. She loved Nick—didn’t she? Would she really not keep her vows to him and God if he decided to move them to Tacoma?

Gwen reached over and took hold of Beth’s hands. “I know this hurts you. I know you cannot begin to imagine how this could work out for the good of anything, but I’m telling you that God can take such tragedy and turn it into something wonderful.”

Beth’s anger got the best of her, and she jerked her hands away. “How can you say that? How can you possibly know that?”

Her sister looked at her oddly. “How? Because I’ve lived it. We lost Mama and then Pa, we moved from place to place, we had to work our fingers raw to keep us fed and clothed. I lost a husband. I loved Harvey dearly. He died, and I couldn’t see anything good in that. My entire life has been filled with challenges, but God has shown himself faithful. If we hadn’t come here, I wouldn’t have met Harvey and married—and I certainly would never have met Hank. If Harvey hadn’t died, I couldn’t have married Hank, and I wouldn’t now carry his child. I have to see the good with the bad.”

Beth felt stupid for having challenged her sister. They had all endured suffering and sadness. Beth’s situation certainly didn’t rank above the misery of others. “I’m sorry,” she said softly. She looked toward the eastern mountains. They had already been kissed with their first snow. It wouldn’t be all that long before the days would grow short and cold.

“I know you didn’t mean anything by it,” Gwen continued. “I just want you to see that your place is with your husband, and your faith has to be in God. They both love you, Beth. Nick, as a man, has his limitations, but God’s love surpasses all of them. God knows your pain, but I promise you He has a plan, even in this.”

“I wish I could know what it was,” Beth replied. “I certainly can’t see anything good in this.”

“Then ask Him to show you,” Gwen suggested.

Beth looked at her sister, knowing the wisdom of her advice. “I’m afraid. What if He shows me, and I cannot bear what the truth of it is?”

Gwen nodded. “Then we must pray that God will also give you strength to face whatever it might be. He won’t leave you orphaned in this. He can ease this sorrow and strengthen your heart so that you can not only endure what you must, but you can come through victorious and strong—even happy.”

“I want to believe that,” Beth said. “I truly do.”

The noon stage brought very few passengers. Nick brought up the horses and began changing out the team while the people filed into Gallatin House for their lunch.

“What happened, Nick?” the driver asked.

“Not sure, Fred. Woke up to it last night. Whole place burned before we could do much, but we did get everyone to safety.”

“So your missus and little boy are all right, then?”

Nick worked to unhitch the team. “Yeah, they’re fine. We’re staying here temporarily. I managed to get the horses to the far pasture, and so I can continue to work the stage stop. I’m gonna have to get some additional feed, though. All the hay was lost.”

Fred nodded and pulled off his neckerchief to wipe his face. “So you can still handle us coming through?”

“For now,” Nick replied. He didn’t know what else to tell the man. “You’d best get your lunch, Fred. I have this under control.”

The older man studied Nick for a moment, then pocketed his neckerchief. “Guess I am a bit famished. You holler if you need anything.”

“What I need, you can’t provide.”

Nick didn’t wait for his response but moved the exhausted team out away from the stage and tied them off at one of the hitching posts at the store. He then began the task of positioning and securing the fresh team of four. Once they were hitched, he collected the now-cooled-down horses and led them to the pasture, where they would find water and grass. After the stage left, Nick planned to ride out to the Shepards’ place and see about getting some hay on credit. He hated the idea, but he had to at least honor his contract. It wouldn’t be long before the stage line would send someone to renegotiate it anyway.Nick would see his duties through until that happened.

“So did you figure out what caused the fire?” Rafe asked as Nick walked back from the pasture to Gallatin House.

He looked up to find Rafe casually leaning against the door as if he didn’t have a care in the world.

“No. Dave Shepard plans to investigate it, but otherwise, I don’t have any idea,” Nick said, not even bothering to stop.

“I’m wondering if you’d like to sell your land to me,” Rafe said.

This did cause Nick to stop in midstep. “What?”

Rafe shrugged. “I’m just wondering if you plan to sell out.”

“I hadn’t really thought about it.” Nick hadn’t figured anyone would be interested in making him an offer on the land alone—especially not Rafe, who’d just managed to wheedle the property behind his place out of Hank.

“Well, I can make you a good offer. Not as much as it might have been worth with the house and stable, but a fair deal, nevertheless.”

“I’ll think about it, Rafe.”

The man smiled. “Good. Glad you aren’t against considering it.”

Nick nodded and turned to head to where the stage was already reloading. He caught sight of Beth on the path just ahead. She’d obviously overheard his discussion with Rafe and looked quite upset. The destruction of their home had left her very shaken and emotional. She’d run off at breakfast, and when he’d started to go after her, Gwen had waved him back, asking him to let her talk to Beth.

The stage pulled out, kicking up dust and leaving the road strangely deserted. Nick decided perhaps he should try to speak to Beth about the situation. He hardly felt capable of comforting her, but he didn’t want her to think he didn’t care.

“Walk with me?” he asked, meeting her questioning gaze.

She nodded and took his offered hand. Nick drew a deep breath. “Where’s Justin?”

“Working with Lacy. He was rather disappointed that we managed to save his schoolbooks,” Beth answered.

Nick could hear that she was trying her best to sound unconcerned with what she’d witnessed between him and Rafe. He wondered how to best broach the subject, but Beth put an end to that when she questioned him.

“So Rafe wants to buy you out?”

“Yes. I was surprised, but he asked.”

“And what did you say?”

Nick blew out a heavy breath. “I told him I’d consider it. I figured you probably overheard.”

Beth nodded. “I just wasn’t sure I’d heard right.”

They followed the road in the direction the stage had gone. Nick couldn’t bear the idea of walking the other direction and being faced with the reminder of all that he’d lost.

“It’s already September, Beth. We really need to think quickly on this.”

“On what, exactly?”

“On our decision about where to move.”

“But I don’t want to move.” She stopped and looked at Nick with a pleading look that went straight through him.

“I know, but there isn’t anything here for us. At least, not for long. The stage contract is nearly up—for Gallatin House, too, as I understand it.”

“But that doesn’t mean anything,” Beth said, clearly upset. “The railroad won’t come in for another year or two, and until then, this is the best place for the stage to stop. It’s established and a perfect location. We shouldn’t have to worry about leaving for at least that long.”

“But it seems senseless to rebuild, only to leave in two years.”