A New York Romance (7 page)

“No, I couldn’t. I don’t want you paying for me,” she said.

Charlie felt like a high school kid asking a girl out for the first time.

“At least stay one more day. You haven’t really even visited the city yet. It’s getting late and all we did was shop,” he almost begged.

“It’s only around 3 o’clock,” she replied. “I have plenty of time today if you want to see something.”

“By the time you have dinner and get to the bus station you’ll be traveling at night,” Charlie pleaded.

“Are you asking me to dinner?” she raised her eyebrows and smiled.

“I guess so,” he shrugged.

Charlie was attractive physically, but Julie did not feel attracted to him in a romantic way. He was simply interesting, carefree, and she was beginning to see the humorous side of him that she was not certain existed before. Besides, what else was she to do and who else was she to talk to in this city of infuriate-faced strangers? And she did want to stay longer. The only thing that would make her run away from him was if he tried to get too close or he revealed something too dark from his secret personality. Of course, if he sang again she would have to leave him for the moment. What were those horrible sounds coming from his soft voice when he tried to sing?

“Well, okay. One more day,” she agreed.

After sightseeing and a late dinner, the coldness of the night forced them to walk to the nearest vacancy sign. It was a two floor motel, the kind that is found along a desolate freeway hoping to pick up vagabond travelers who become too tired to drive any further in the night. The cracked paint and crumbling sidewalk was evidence that this was probably not one of New York City’s finer establishments.

“May we have two rooms for the night, my good sir?” Charlie asked the sloppily dressed man behind the counter. He was tall and skinny, probably in his early thirties, working there for a paycheck without motivation to do what he really wanted to do in life. Charlie simply loved him the way he was.

“We only have one more room available, but it’s two beds,” said the motel clerk.

Charlie paused.

“That’s fine,” Julie agreed as she opened up her purse. Charlie smiled inwardly that she agreed to stay in the same room. It made him feel ‘not rejected,’ in a strange human way. He noticed that she only had about $150.00, mostly fives and tens with ones thickening the stack. She probably had just enough to get home, but still wanted to contribute to the price of the room.

“I can get it,” Charlie said.

“No, I’ll give you something. As long as I have enough for the bus ride home. You bought dinner.”

Charlie agreed. The greasy-haired fellow behind the counter took the money without ringing it up in the cash register. He grabbed the key and handed it to them. “Room 113. Have a good night,” he said with a wide-eyed grin toward Charlie, staring at Julie as she walked away.

Julie watched as Charlie nervously opened the room door with the key.

“Look Julie, I don’t want you to be uncomfortable. I’ll sleep in the lobby or something.”

“Don’t be silly. I trust you or I wouldn’t be here now,” she replied.

They entered the room and Julie went into the bathroom with her purse and a package from the mall. Charlie sat in the chair and emptied his mind of all thoughts. A moment later she came out in her new, long T-shirt and quickly hopped into bed. Charlie noticed her out of the corner of his eye and quickly turned to look out the window, his mind now filled with so many thoughts that he could not keep track of them. His blood rushed through his veins, his palms began to sweat, and his heart beat faster.

“What’s wrong? Aren’t you tired?” she asked seeing Charlie fully clothes with his shoes still on.

“Yes.”

“Are you going to go to bed?

“No.”

“Are you just going to stare out the window?”

“Yes,” he answered, trying to ignore the rush of chemicals that flooded his veins, struggling to fill his mind with something else besides the image of her legs hanging out of a long shirt.

There was a long pause. Charlie stared out the window at the 24 hour mart across the road, simply wishing the patrons happiness, love, and good health as they walked in and out of the store.

Charlie thought of the chubby man crossing the street last night, how embarrassed he must have been losing his pants in the middle of the street. He considered how he might have affected the man, as the drivers taunted him. He looked up at the moon over the all-night mart and wished the chubby man love and happiness. He also wished that every time the man looked at the moon that good things would happen for him the next day. He imagined the man waking up happy and finding love and happiness throughout each day.

He turned around and Julie was covered up in her bed already asleep. He kicked off his shoes and pulled back the covers on the other bed and laid there staring at the ceiling, while dwelling in the feeling of love and happiness for all creatures until he drifted off to sleep.

“Ahhhhhhhhh,” Julie screamed.

Charlie woke as she struggled in her bed, perhaps to pull the covers up over herself.

He turned away and said, “I’m sorry, I cannot always help what I dream about.”

“What?” She jumped up and ran into the bathroom. She peeked around the corner, “There’s a huge black spider in my bed, get it Charlie!”

“A spider? That’s all?” he whispered.

“It was just there dangling above me when I opened my eyes! I think it was going to crawl in my mouth or something!” she said, following the nightmares of her imagination.

“Oh,” he sighed softly enjoying the morning sunlight in his eyes. He turned to see the spider and smiled. He let it crawl on his hand then gently placed the creature outside.

“I’m going to shower. We have to get out of here now,” Julie said.

Charlie casually agreed uncertain why people were so afraid of such a tiny bug.

When she finished getting dressed in her new clothes, Julie saw Charlie’s reflection in the mirror and quickly turned to him, “How did your cuts heal so quickly?”

“They did? I hadn’t noticed,” he remarked mysteriously, with the shrug of a shoulder.

Charlie showered himself and put on his new pants and hoody. When he came out of the bathroom Julie asked, “So what did you dream about last night, Charlie Daniels? Fiddles? Hickory stumps? The Devil?”

“If you do stay longer we should get you some new pajamas. Big, ugly pajamas and maybe some of those pointy glasses from the fifties. Oh no, forget the glasses,” he said.

“They are pretty sexy, aren’t they?”

Charlie turned away. She couldn’t see but he may have been blushing.

“Yep,” he admitted.

“So what do you want to do today?” Julie asked.

“Eat breakfast and then, who knows.”

Julie nodded then finished brushing her hair while Charlie paid for another night at the motel so they did not have to lug their bags with them. Charlie was planning to stay anyway, and he didn’t mind sharing his room with spiders.

As they walked down the street Charlie became tense from the screeching cars, blaring horns, the variety of music mixing together from the shops, and especially the sound of construction machinery. He could not recall a time throughout history when daily life was filled with so much noise.

“What’s wrong, Charlie?” She could see the tension in his eyes.

“All the noise,” he replied. “I do not do well in the city. I am not used to…”

“To what, Charlie? You’re keeping something from me. You should just tell me and get it over with. What can be worse than hurting a bus full of people?”

She was still in disbelief about that claim.

“It is nothing I have done, it is who I am. You will think I’m
crazy
, or should I say
even crazier
.”

“Let’s go in here and get some breakfast.” She grabbed him by the arm and pulled him into the nearest café. There were enough of them.

“You mean lunch,” Charlie said, referring to how long they took to get out of the motel and find a place to eat.

They sat down, watching what might be the last heavy snow fall from the winter season.

“You might as well tell me what’s on your mind, you know, the reason I will think you’re crazy. Try me. I bet I don’t run out of here screaming and I promise I won’t laugh. I’ll just listen. Besides, I’m too hungry to leave without eating,” she promised with comical sincerity.

“Well, alright,” he hesitantly agreed.

“Good Afternoon! What can I get ya’ll?” the waitress said with her dominate southern accent.

They ordered their food and the waitress let them know she would have it out in a
jippy.
Charlie wanted to ask what a jippy was but Julie spoke up first.

“Well, tell me. Tell me everything, Charlie.”

He took a deep breath.

“Okay! My name is not Charlie Daniels. That is just the name I chose,” he paused and looked around the room as if making sure no one else would hear him.

“What do you mean
chose
? Who are you?”

“I’m Cupid,” he stated quickly.

“Cupid?” she huffed, remembering her promise not to laugh. “Like the little boy with wings who shoots arrows at people?”

“I knew I shouldn’t have told…”

“I’m sorry,” she interrupted, wiping the growing smirk off of her face.

“I am not a little boy and I wish you humans would quit putting diapers on the pictures you draw of me. I don’t have wings either. Never have. And I don’t shoot people with arrows. That’s just inhumane. You know nothing of who I am anymore, just like you humans know nothing of true love anymore.”

He might not shoot people with arrows but his words felt as sharp as one. It was a tone that let Julie know he was serious and a little upset, like the way a person feels when they are underappreciated for all they have done.

Julie also remembered her promise not to run away. She did not know what to say. She simply let Charlie, or Cupid continue.

“You see, people used to call upon me when they needed my help with love, but not anymore. People do not really fall in love anymore the way they use to, like that couple in the café this morning. It is very rare and that is why the couple was so important to me. I suppose I needed them more than they needed me. I needed to see them to know people can still find true love.”

“I see. You mean you’re the real Cupid? The Greek god, Cupid?” she questioned in disbelief as he seemed too ordinary in appearance, but she was intrigued with how much he thought about love.

“Yes, I am. I was a god to the ancient Greeks, but today people do not even see me as an angel. They do not ask for my help. So I took the form of a human so that I could come here and understand why humans do not want true love anymore. Of course I did not know how to take care of my body, I mean it seemed simple from watching humans for so long, but it was more difficult than I expected. I never felt hunger before, or any physical pain for that matter. The first time I put my finger in a light socket, it was very shocking to me, literally and figuratively.

“This body took me a while to get used to. The first time I soiled myself I thought my body was turning inside out. I met an older couple and they took me in until I figured things out, but I never told them who I was. When I was ready I set out to find answers to the problem with human love, but as you know personally, I have trouble being around people. I have trouble controlling the emotions that go along with this body. My mind is still quite powerful, but in the body I’m sometimes
out of control
, as you humans say.”

“Like accidentally hurting a bus load of people,” Julie said.

“Yes,” he replied, “exactly like that.”

There was a long pause, which was uncomfortable for Julie. She still did not know what to say. Then the waitress broke the silence, “If there’s anything else, just holler,” as she placed their brunch in front of them.

“If you’re Cupid, can’t you just make everyone fall in love? Why can’t you just slip that purple potion in the water supply?”

“It doesn’t work like that. All I can do is reveal to them true love, but they must be close to it already. The problem today is that people do not know what true love is. Most people are
pleasure seekers
or they get in a relationship because they are afraid to be alone. For true love to work, you cannot be afraid to be alone. Most people compare their love to how much love they see coming toward them, how much they are receiving from their partner. But true love starts with how much love is coming out of you, and you need a certain amount of time alone to understand its power. There is nothing more beautiful than two people who find true love and see it in each other. That is what I perfect. But in order for me to help anyone, they must first believe in it, and in these days that is very rare.”

“That is interesting Charlie, or, I mean Cupid. Do you want me to call you Cupid now?”

“Charlie will be fine,” he said. “I’m kind of undercover, you know.”

“You obviously thought a lot about what love is. Have you fallen in love with a girl?” Julie asked out of curiosity.

“Why?”

The look on his face as he had questioned
why
made it appear as if Julie’s question did not make sense.

“What do you mean why? Everyone wants to find someone else they can share their life with.”

Charlie looked puzzled. The words of the older woman who claimed to be his mother echoed in his mind,
You’re going to grow old and be all alone…
He considered that Julie might not be able to perceive the truth in his claim. It was too farfetched for her to even consider it to be true. But he answered anyway, “I am not human. I do not need such things. It is my job to help humans find love.”

“I’m not buying it,” she shook her head. “You called me beautiful. You were attracted to me. You obviously have some human desire to be with someone.” Julie indulged him as if to find the flaws in his story that would acknowledge that he is not Cupid. She was more irritated now than attracted to him.

“No, it is just because of the body I am in. I don’t need physical love like humans do. I am not a physical creature,” he pointed out as he began to shovel down his veggie omelet and sipped on yet
another
café mocha.

Julie stared into his eyes refusing to turn away. Charlie felt uncomfortable, like he still had something to hide from her and was about to be exposed. He diverted his eyes and attention back to his food and drink. She noticed his unkempt hair. He washed it but he never combed it as if he didn’t think twice about impressing anyone.

“I think your story is one of the saddest stories I’ve ever heard.”

That caught his attention. Charlie recognized the sincerity in her voice. He felt a spark of hope that she might believe his story. He felt the weight of having to hide from the world lifted off his shoulders. But he didn’t understand why she would feel sadness for him.

“What do you mean?” he asked. “I am very happy. I feel love for everything all the time. There is great joy in this. It is just this human body, you know, it is easy to become frustrated in it, but I know what love is.”

“But you do not share that love with anyone,” Julie argued. “That is what we humans want.”

“I share my love with everyone all the time. I, of all creatures, know what true love is. It’s the gift I give, or at least used to give, to humanity.”

“It‘s not that. If what you’re saying is true, then you have spent eternity helping others fall in love, in
true love
, but you haven’t found it for yourself, with someone else. That is what I think is sad.”

“You’re talking about the human part of love. Where I’m from we do not fall in love in human ways, despite what your mythologies say.”

Julie paused. She could feel the frustration in his tone. She considered the possibility that what he was claiming was true.

“You’ve spent your whole existence giving the gift of true love to others and you never experienced it yourself with someone else in a human way,” she admitted the humanness with pride. “You’ve never expressed that true love you feel with the closeness we humans have. That is what I think is sad.”

“Of course not. I am not human!” he repeated. “Many of us gods found ways of bringing humans closer to God. I did it through human love, but I have no need for it. I’m already with God.”

“Maybe,” she indulged him, “but you’re human now. Don’t you think you should know what human love is like if that is what you are selling?”

“It is too dangerous for me to be close to someone even if I wanted to be. I’m not used to this body and if I get angry bad things can happen,” he recited the warning again, like a broken record to her bored ears.

“So you desire love in a human way but you’re too afraid that you may hurt someone if you love them?” she made clear.

“Yes, I mean no,” Charlie shook his head. “I do not need love in human ways. It is just this body that needs it. It will not last and I will be formless again. It’s this body; I have difficulty with these human emotions. They are new to me. Human love ignites passions, which can be difficult to control, and I can harm someone with my thoughts just like that. It is best that I stay away. I’m just here to observe more closely, Juliet,” he explained. “To find out what happened to love.”

Julie stared at him again as he looked around the room, observing all the couples talking over their mochas, lattés, and pastry snacks.

“I tried to tell people who I was before. I didn’t think it would be such a big thing, but they just thought I was nuts. So I kept quiet about it, until now. I live alone and just do my work. I never tell anyone these things, not even the couples I help. Not even the older couple who took care of me believed me.”

“So you did tell them?” she asked.

“Yes, I did, but then I denied it when I saw the look on their faces. They thought I was so sincere about it that I should go into acting.”