A Perfect Trade (Harlequin Superromance) (26 page)

He rose slowly. “I told you I loved you. Something I’ve never told another woman. What did I get from you in return? Not a damn thing.”

Jenny wrapped her arms around herself as his angry words hammered her. She wanted to make him stop, to tell him he was wrong, but she couldn’t speak past the tightness in her throat. She turned her face to the window, unable to face the bitterness in his green eyes and unwilling to let him see the tears burning in her own eyes.

“You win. I give up.” Tru strode to the door, then halted. “I was in this relationship by myself all along.”

Jenny didn’t move until she heard the door swish shut behind him. Then in the silence of the empty room, she let the tears fall.

* * *

J
ENNY
SHOULD
HAVE
been happy that she was being released. She’d spent the past two days longing for the peace of her own home, where no one would bother her for blood-pressure readings or stick her with a needle for tests. She wanted to scrub that awful disinfectant smell off her body before it became ingrained, and eat anything but hospital food.

Yet, now she was about to be discharged, nerves gnawed at her stomach. In here, she’d been cocooned from the outside world. Maggie and Jake had visited, but everyone else had kept their distance. Jenny was glad; she hadn’t wanted pitying looks or well-intentioned platitudes. Once she walked through the glass doors downstairs, she became fair game.

Don’t flatter yourself. You’re not that important.

Her uncle’s sniping voice pissed her off. “You’re wrong—
you’re
not that important.”

The solitude had given her a chance to think about everything that had happened since that fateful night, long ago, both good and bad. She’d been shocked to realize how much of what she’d done in her life had been driven by that vile voice in her head. She’d banished him from her life, yet he’d continued to dictate it. Harboring that shameful secret had given him way too much power over her.

Now her secret was out, she had nothing left to fear. And she was damned if she’d allow Douglas Boult to affect one more second of her life.

Instantly, she felt better. Stronger. Free.

The irony didn’t escape her. What Tru had done actually
had
been for the best.

Her chest squeezed. She’d also had plenty of time to think about him. It hadn’t taken long to come to a painful conclusion.

She missed Tru.

He’d always been there for her. Even during the years when she’d thought she hated him. Somehow, the knowledge of that safety cushion had enabled her to survive. To have the confidence to live her life.

Now Tru wasn’t there and never would be again. The gap he left yawned larger by the day.

Jenny hadn’t heard the outcome of his trip to Denver and Detroit. Her gut told her he’d choose the exciting young team the Avalanche were building. They were a team on the rise, with a bright future.

Plus, Denver was a long way from New Jersey...and her. Her chest squeezed tighter, making it hard to breathe.

The door swished open and one of the nurses bustled in. “I need you to sign the paperwork and then you’re ready to go.” She handed Jenny a clipboard and pen. “I’ve highlighted the relevant parts.”

“Great.” Jenny forced a smile as she signed the forms. “Can I get a cab downstairs?”

The nurse frowned. “But you have a ride home.”

Jenny’s heart skipped. “I do?”

“Sure. She’s waiting outside your room.”

She.
Must be Maggie. Jenny was grateful for the thoughtful gesture, but she couldn’t help the twinge of disappointment.

“I’ll give you your final instructions when you’re ready to leave.”

Once the nurse had gone, Jenny rose and gathered her things. She looked up when she heard footsteps. “Lizzie, what are you doing here?”

“You mean because you didn’t tell me you were in the hospital?” her sister retorted.

Guilt tugged at Jenny. “I didn’t want to worry you. It was nothing serious.”

“So it was better for me to panic when I couldn’t reach you on the Fourth?” Anger flashed in Lizzie’s eyes. “If I hadn’t got hold of Maggie, who told me where you were, I’d have called the police.”

“I’m sorry.” Jenny reached for her sister, who shrugged her off. “I should have let you know. But I thought it best to wait until I was home.” She winced at her choice of words.

“Is that why you didn’t tell me you were pregnant?” Lizzie’s voice rang with hurt.

Jenny sank onto the bed. “It’s complicated....”

Lizzie swiped the air, as if swiping away Jenny’s excuse. “How complicated is ‘I’m having a baby’?”

“The situation is complicated. It wasn’t something I wanted to tell you over the phone.” She sighed. “I was waiting until you came home, so we could talk about it face-to-face.”

“Why didn’t you insist I came home?”

“It’s not that important.” God, she was making a mess of this. No wonder Lizzie stared at her as if she’d lost her mind.

“My unmarried, not even dating sister is expecting and you don’t think it’s important?”

“Like I said, it’s complicated.” Jenny rubbed her forehead. “Let’s go home and discuss this there.”

Lizzie got a familiar stubborn expression. “Is it because you don’t trust me?”

“Of course not.”

“Then why don’t you tell me things?”

“I...” She couldn’t lie; she
had
kept secrets from her sister. “I’ve tried to protect you. That meant there were some things you didn’t need to know. I’ve done the best I could.”

“I’m really grateful for all you’ve done.” Lizzie gave her a half smile. “But have you ever thought that I might want to look after you, too? You don’t have to do everything alone.”

“She’s right,” Maggie said from the doorway.

Jenny’s head snapped up in surprise. “What are you doing here?”

“I came to take you home.”

“But I said I’d get a cab.”

“Like I’d let you.” Her friend shook her head. “That’s the point your sister is trying to make. When was the last time you let someone help you? I admire your self-sufficiency, but, sweetie, you have to stop shutting us out.”

“I don’t mean to hold back,” Jenny said slowly. “Least of all, from the two of you.”

Maggie’s brown eyes shone with understanding. “I know how hard it is to let people in. To risk being hurt even more. But if you don’t let those barriers down occasionally, you risk losing the chance to experience the important things like love and happiness.”

As she’d done with Tru.

He’d given her a chance to let him in and she’d blown it. The truth of that thought hit her with the force of a slap shot. Her body bowed as the pain of all she’d thrown away cut through her.

The bed dipped beside her, first on the right, then the left. Lizzie put an arm around her shoulders, then Maggie did the same. They held Jenny tight, saying nothing, but transmitting their love through their hugs.

After several moments, Jenny hugged them back.

It was too late for her and Tru. But she wouldn’t make that mistake with Lizzie and Maggie. “I promise, I’ll do better. You’ll have to remind me when I slip up.”

“Don’t worry, I will.” Lizzie got to her feet and gathered Jenny’s things.

Jenny and Maggie laughed, then rose, too.

At the door, her sister turned. “You haven’t told me who the lucky father is.”

“That’s a long story.”

Lizzie rolled her eyes. “Seriously?”

Maggie gave Jenny a pointed look.

Jenny sighed. “It’s Tru.”

Her sister’s eyes widened. “The guy you’ve hated for most of your adult life?”

“Like I said, it’s complicated.”

“I can’t wait to hear all about it.”

As they walked out of the room, the nurse came up to them with a wheelchair. “Sorry, but you have to ride. Hospital rules.”

Jenny hid her relief as she sat in the chair, not wanting to admit how drained she was from the conversation. Lizzie pushed her down the corridor and into the elevator. Jenny didn’t notice where they were going until an automated voice said, “Eleventh floor.”

“This isn’t the way to the parking garage.”

“I thought you might want to stop by and see Harry before we left,” Lizzie said airily. “The nurse said you hadn’t visited while you were here.”

Yet more guilt. Jenny had felt she’d let Harry down in some way, so she’d stayed away. “It would be good to see how he’s doing.”

As Lizzie wheeled her through the doorway to Harry’s room, Jenny’s jaw dropped open.

Harry wasn’t lying in bed, motionless. He was sitting up—wide-awake.

“About time you came to see me, missy.”

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

“Y
OU
’
RE
PACKING
ALREADY
,
BRO
?”

Tru looked up from the suitcase he was zipping shut to see Jake standing by the open front door. “I’m heading to Denver as soon as Andy nails down the contract details. They want to announce my signing on Monday.”

“From the amount of stuff you’re taking, I’m guessing you won’t be back home anytime soon.” His friend waved a hand over the piles of clothes and other junk spread across the hall.

“Not until I’ve got a place to live.” What was there to come home for? “I haven’t decided what to do about my house, but I’ll hang on to it until I see how things pan out.”

“You’re not coming back for the off-season?” Jake stared at him, surprised.

“There’s not much point.”

When Jake started to argue, Tru held up a hand to stop him. “I won’t decide anything right away. I’ll take enough with me to see me through the first month or so, then I’ll get Maggie to ship whatever else I need.”

“She’ll appreciate the business. Hardshaw’s been screwing her and Tracy around lately.” Jake stepped through the obstacle course of items and sat on the stairs.

Tru got another empty suitcase and laid it on the hall floor. He tried to decide what to pack next, when the truth was he didn’t give a crap.

After several minutes, he swore. “The hell with this. Want a beer?”

“Sure.” Jake followed him into the kitchen and sat at the table. “Were you planning to say goodbye or sneak out of town?”

“I’d have stopped by to see you.”

“What about everyone else?”

Tru hitched a shoulder. “You expected me to throw a goodbye party?”

“That’s what we do normally, when any of us leaves.”

“Except no one’s speaking to me.” Tru lifted his bottle in a mock salute.

“You’re exaggerating. They’re all talking to you.”

Tru raised an eyebrow. “All?”

“Okay, probably not Ike.”

“Or Kenny or Linc. For sure, not my mom.”

That last one stung the most. Almost as much as losing Jenny. And boy did that hurt like a son of a bitch. Tru clenched his jaw, fighting the anger and pain that surged through him, scraping over still-raw wounds.

“Your mom may not agree with what you did, but she’d never cut you out of her life. Kenny hates anything confrontational and Linc’s buried himself in something he understands—hockey.”

“Then why isn’t anyone answering my calls? Mom wouldn’t even pick up and she’s obsessive about the phone. She can’t stand letting it ring.”

“I don’t know. Have you thought about going over there?”

Sure he had. But he didn’t want to face her sadness. Feel the weight of her disappointment. He knew he deserved it. Only, after what had happened with Jenny, he couldn’t handle any more. “I thought it best to communicate from a distance.”

“Why the hell would you think something that dumb?”

“I let everyone down.” Tru sank into a chair.

“No, you didn’t.” Jake slammed his beer down on the table. “You made a mistake. A big, hairy monster of a mistake. You upset your family, but you didn’t let them down. Your bastard of a father did.”

“I should have listened to you and Jenny. You both warned me.”

“It’s easy to say that with the benefit of hindsight. You did what you thought best, bro.”

Tru’s laugh was short and bitter. “Funny how that always blows up in my face.” Why had it taken so long to learn that lesson?

“You’ve been helping everyone for years. It’s only gone against you twice.”

“Four times, if you include the fiasco with my old man and—” Tru swallowed to ease the tightness in his throat “—Jenny.”

Understanding glimmered in Jake’s eyes. “Have you spoken to her since you saw her at the hospital?”

Tru shook his head. “She doesn’t need me. I’m doing fine without her, too.”

“I can see that.”

That was the problem with friends; they saw through lies. Even those you told yourself. “Okay, it’s a load of bull. Happy?”

“No. But at least you admitted it. Now maybe you’ll get off your ass and fix it.”

Tru threw his hands in the air. “Trying to fix things is what got me into this damn mess in the first place. I’m done.”

“You’re missing the point, bro.” Jake pointed his bottle at Tru.

“What’s that?”

“Helping people solve their problems isn’t the issue. Flying solo is.” Jake blew out a heavy breath. “I don’t get it. On the ice, in the locker room, you’re always ‘team first.’ Everywhere else, you think you have to be like Superman, Batman and every other dude in tights rolled into one—saving the world and conquering evil by yourself.”

“So what should I be doing?”

“What you’d do for a teammate—help people to help themselves.”

What Jake said made sense, but it was too late. “Fact is, I won’t be getting many calls in Denver, especially from my family. But, if miracles happen, I’ll approach things differently.”

“They’ll call.”

“We’ll see.” He drank his beer to cover how much he wanted Jake to be right. “None of this helps me resolve things with Jenny. She can’t trust me enough to let me be a proper partner in her life. And I won’t settle for anything less.”

“You love her.”

“Yeah, but she doesn’t love me.”

“Are you sure?”

Tru started to say
yes,
but Jake’s expression made him stop and think. “Maybe she
did
love me. Now...” He shrugged, trying to hide the burning pain the memory of their last conversation caused. “It’s safe to say she’s over me.”

God, he needed to skate. To slam bodies and fire pucks. To play until his body was too tired to feel and his brain too tired to think. “What am I going to do?”

“Give her time. She’s had a lot to process, not least Harry waking up and turning everything upside down again.”

“Once she has her old job back, she won’t need me.”

“What about the new lives growing inside her? Are you really prepared to let your kids grow up without you?”

“As she said, it’s better for them to have no father than one who doesn’t live up to expectations. I wouldn’t see much of them anyway.” His gut twisted.

“That’s bull. You’ll be a great father.”

“That’s assuming she wants me to be involved, which she doesn’t.”

“She will. Love doesn’t disappear because of a few mistakes. Look at me and Maggie. I’d thought we’d never get over what I did at that gala evening. But we got through it. Trust that Jenny’s love will guide her back to you.”

Tru hated feeling helpless. Hated that he had to let someone else dictate the play. “I won’t be holding my breath. In the meantime, I’ve given her what she wants.”

“Be patient. Take it one day at a time. That’s how we won the Cup.”

“I thought we won because we played better.”

“We were smarter, too. That’s what you have to be now. It’s Game 7 for you and Jenny.”

What choice did he have? “You’re right.”

Jake grinned. “Can I have that in writing? Truman Jelinek just admitted I’m right.”

Tru punched him on the arm. Jake punched him back. Chairs scraped back and they hit the floor, wrestling.

As they scuffled, a sense of loss swept through Tru. He’d miss his friend. On and off the ice. “Any word on who your new defensive partner will be?” he gasped, as they collapsed on the floor.

Jake’s chest heaved. “Not yet. They’ll probably put one of the young guys with me, so I can teach him what I know.”

“Whoever it is will be damn lucky.”

“Not as lucky as the kids in Denver.”

Determined not to let the conversation get maudlin, he grinned. “Yeah, well, they’re getting the best defenseman in the league.”

“Zdeno Chara is moving to Denver, too?”

“Ha-ha. You should do stand-up.”

A commotion in the hall caught his attention, causing him to miss Jake’s reply.

His mother bustled into the kitchen. Fitzpatrick followed behind at a sedate pace, carrying a cardboard box. Jake’s parents brought up the rear, each carrying coolers.

Tru’s stomach dropped to his Nikes as his mom jammed her hands on her hips. Her green eyes glittered with anger.

“You think you can leave without a proper goodbye, Truman?”

“I called, Ma, but you didn’t answer.”

“We were away.” His mom blushed as she looked over her shoulder at Fitzpatrick. “We’re back now.”

“Don’t forget to tell him your news, Karina,” Aunt Tina said.

His mom’s color deepened. “In good time. Don’t put the buggy before the horse.”

“It’s a cart, love,” Rory corrected gently.

“Cart, buggy. It’s the same, no?”

“Sure, Ma.” Tru managed a smile. “So what’s up?”

“I...uh... We... That is, Rory and I...”

He’d never seen his mom so flustered.

Jake’s mom rolled her eyes. “They’re engaged.”

His eyebrows shot up. “Really? Wow.”

“I was getting there, Tina.” His mom frowned at her best friend, then reached for Fitzpatrick’s hand. “Rory asked me before, but I said no. Perhaps because I was afraid. After the party, seeing Radek again, I realized I was being silly. I didn’t want to waste any more time.”

At least some good had come out of that disastrous day. Tru stuck out his hand to Fitzpatrick. “Welcome to the family. You’re getting the best woman in the world.”

Rory shook his hand. “I’m definitely the luckiest man in the world.”

Tru hugged his mom. “Congratulations, Ma.”

“You don’t mind?” She looked at him anxiously.

“No way. Be happy.”

“Now, Tru,” Aunt Tina said. “We’ve brought your goodbye party to you.”

“We’ll have a proper celebration when you come back home,” Uncle Gio added, as he took foil-wrapped containers out of the cardboard box.

“You’ve forgiven me for screwing up the party?” Tru asked.

Aunt Tina huffed. “There was nothing to forgive. That fool father of yours is the one we’re cross with.”

His mom reached up and took his face in her hands. “Maybe you didn’t do it the right way, but it was time we put that mess with your father behind us.” She pulled his head down and kissed his forehead.

A spark of hope glimmered inside. Perhaps his brothers weren’t totally lost to him.

The spark began to burn more brightly.

And maybe Jenny wasn’t, either.

* * *

“H
AVE
YOU
DECIDED
if you’re coming back to work?”

Jenny had been expecting Harry’s question for the past few days. After their emotional reunion, it hadn’t taken long for him to get back to his old, meddling self. Every time she’d stopped by, he’d had more questions about everything from work to her financial situation to the latest news about her pregnancy.

And, of course, Tru.

Harry had listened quietly to that sorry story, then said simply, “Follow your heart.”

He’d had plenty to say about Irving firing her. Within twenty-four hours, the whole thing had been reverted, as if it had never happened. Except for Jenny’s new, accurate contract that had been signed and lodged in the files.

Anticipating that his next step would be to give her back her old job, Jenny had thought of little else. She was surprised to find she wasn’t as excited about the prospect as she’d expected. Her current job with
The Journal
was more satisfying and she wanted to see how far she could take it. There were no guarantees, but it had potential.

Then there was the realization that the twelve-hour days and six-day weeks, the requirement to be available whenever, to do whatever Harry wanted, and the stress weren’t ideal for a single mother.

Jenny hated letting Harry down. Especially since she’d just got him back.

She looked across the ward’s sunroom to the man who’d been more of a guardian than Douglas Boult ever had.

Harry looked surprisingly well, though he still had some weakness on his left side, in his arm and leg. He also hated having to use a cane and complained long and hard about having to stick to a mainly liquid diet until his stomach got used to solid food again.

“Well, missy, what’s the verdict?”

“I’m really grateful for everything you’ve done for me....”

“Yeah, yeah. Cut to the chase.”

Jenny took a deep breath. “I’m sorry, but my answer is no.”

“Good.” He nodded approvingly.

She sat back, startled by his reaction. “Haven’t you been maneuvering and plotting these past few days so you can give me my old job back?”

“I wanted it to be there, if that’s what you wanted, but I hoped you’d come to your senses and follow your heart.”

Not that again. “Tru and I are finished.”

“Why? You love the man. You’re carrying his babies. So what—the two of you had a spat. It’s time you made up.”

Her jaw dropped. “It was way more serious than a spat. We can’t just kiss and make things better.”

Something else she’d thought a lot about since her discharge—how to fix things with Tru. Having figured out she wanted her life to change, she’d also decided she wanted Tru in it. Making that happen wasn’t straightforward, though.

“Why not?”

“Because,” she sputtered, “it’s complicated.”

“Bull. Looks simple to me. I know you’re scared to trust him, but you’re so busy trying to avoid being hurt again that you don’t realize you’re only hurting yourself more.” He grinned. “Put on a pretty dress, some lipstick and your sexiest high heels. Say you’re prepared to compromise and start over.”

If only it was that easy. “I can’t. He’s left New Jersey
and
me, and started his new life.”

“Planes don’t fly to Denver anymore?”

She gave him a wry look. “I can’t just turn up. Besides, I don’t know where he’s staying.”

“That’s the best you can do?” Harry waggled his finger at her.

Her pulse skipped with hope. “What would I say to him, when I got there?”

“The truth. You love him. You want to marry him and have him be a real father to your children.” Harry puffed out his chest. “That is what you want, isn’t it?”

“Yes, but how can I be sure I won’t be making a big mistake? Can I really trust him?”