A Road to Let Go (Fallen Tuesday #4) (30 page)

In her mind, Mel calculated what
she would be getting in her next paycheck, assuming it was going to be her last.
Now that she didn
’
t have to
pay Jon anymore, she would have enough to pay off the remainder of her apartment
lease so she could leave.

To go where?

Jon had called her three times
already, leaving messages. He begged her to call. He wanted to apologize for
what happened in Washington and he wanted to check on her. It touched Mel that
Jon was showing a different side of himself to her. There was nothing Jon would
be able to say, because it wasn
’
t
so much about what happened in Washington involving her father as much as it
was about Jake.

Jake.

He had stolen Mel
’
s heart and Mel didn
’
t know what to do. She couldn
’
t stop thinking about the woman
in his apartment.

Together? Pregnant?

A knock sounded at the door.

Mel pushed from the table, figuring
it was probably Jon or Alex coming over to check on her.

Mel looked at the artwork laying on
the table. It had felt good to actually create something, but she only painted it
because Jake told her to.

When Mel opened the door, Jake
stood there holding a bag in one hand and a guitar in the other.

“
Jake
…”

“
I
probably have no right to be here,
”
Jake said.
“
But I have to
be. I won
’
t back down and
walk away from this without a fight, Mel. I
’
m
sorry I didn
’
t just share
everything at once. I didn
’
t
want to scare you. I didn
’
t
want you to think of me as some kind of asshole musician that did whatever he
wanted to whoever he wanted. Bad enough how I met you. But the second I met
you, you changed me. That first I saw you will forever be within my heart, Mel.
I
’
m sorry about Chloe and
that she was there. She
’
s
history, okay?
”

“
Is
that everything?
”
Mel
asked.

“
No.
I
’
m done with my apartment.
I
’
m moving somewhere else.
Chloe is gone and I
’
m out.
And you have the album artwork that I need. And I want to play you a song on
this guitar. And I want to love you forever, Mel."

Mel swallowed a lump in her throat.

"I love you. I am in love with
you, Mel."

Mel eyed him again. The bag. The
guitar. His clothes. His chiseled jaw line. The scruff on his face. The look in
his eyes. Everything about him was so sincere. He was sexy, handsome, and he
could take care of her
…

“
What
do I do right now?
”
Mel
asked.

“
I
can
’
t answer that,
”
Jake said.

“
I
wish I knew everything.
”

“
You
do,
”
Jake said.
“
I
’
m
sorry. I can tell you my entire past if you want. But the bottom line is
simple. I messed up and she got pregnant. But she lost it. Now she
’
s gone. If that makes me sound
mean, that
’
s fine. I accept
that. But I
’
ll tell you
anything you want to know, Mel. My past is over. The present is now. But my
future is in front of my face.
”

Mel felt her hands started to
twitch. She could jump into his arms and forgive him. Or she could slam the
door in Jake
’
s face and
disappear to anywhere in the world. But there was no fun in that. Not with the
way her heart felt.

Mel grabbed Jake by the shirt and
pulled him into the apartment. He opened his hands and dropped his bag and the
guitar. Mel touched Jake
’
s
face and felt her lips trembling. She wanted to kiss him. She wanted to have
him for the rest of her life.

It hit her then.

“
Jake,
I love you too,
”
she said.
“
I can
’
t believe everything is a mess around us when we
feel like this.
”

Jake touched her face.
“
Maybe that
’
s just how it
’
s going to be for us. It
’
s always going to be a mess, but
we have to find each other through it all. No matter how dark it gets. No
matter how busy. No matter how scary. We have to make sure we stop to look into
each other's eyes so we always remember this feeling we have right now.
”

“
I
need you to kiss me right now.
”

Jake stroked his thumb along Mel
’
s cheek.
“
Sweetheart, I plan on kissing you for the rest of
my life.
”

Jake
’
s
lips touched Mel
’
s and she
closed her eyes. Somehow that kiss fixed the ache in her heart.

(28)

Jake kept his hand over Mel
’
s eyes and held her other hand
tight as he guided her along.

“
Don
’
t let me fall,
”
she warned.

“
Never,
”
Jake said.
“
Just trust me.
”

“
I
don
’
t like this at all.
”

“
I
know you don
’
t. But deal
with it.
”

Jake walked along the front of the
stage. The band had another radio station interview and a free concert that
night. This one was going to be the biggest. They weren
’
t in a parking lot anymore. This one was in an open
field. Initial reports were that they were expecting five thousand fans. It was
a fraction of the crowds that would be out on the tour, but it was still a lot
of people.

The first single for the new album
hit and went straight to number one. The second song would be released in just
a few days. The tour dates were ready to go for the first leg of the tour.
Frank was now working with the record company and the band to prepare for the
show. That meant getting the stage setup complete, making set lists, picking
out guitars and amps, plus preparing to live on a tour bus for weeks at a time.

It was amazing. Everything a
rockstar could ever dream of.

Jake stopped walking and took his
hand off Mel
’
s face.

“
Okay,
”
Mel said.
“
I see a field.
”

“
That
field is going to be filled with people,
”
Jake said.
“
Thousands of
fans cheering the band.
”

“
I
know,
”
Mel said.
“
I
’
ve
seen
…”

“
But
not this,
”
Jake said.

He turned Mel around and pointed.
The backdrop behind Mack
’
s
drum kit was the official album cover for the new Fallen Tuesday album. The
second Jake saw Mel's artwork he knew it would make the perfect album cover.
The rest of the band agreed.

Mel let out a small gasp and
covered her mouth.

“
How
’
s it look?
”
Jake asked.

“
That
’
s my painting,
”
Mel whispered.

“
That
’
s right. You made that. It
’
s beautiful, Mel, just like you.
”

“
I
can
’
t believe this,
”
Mel said.
“
It
’
s
another dream come true.
”

“
A
dream that you get to pursue,
”
Jake said.

Frank had arranged for Mel to meet
with the record company about doing cover art for more bands, but she declined
the meeting. She didn't want to be involved with the band or the music.
Instead, she confessed to Jake that her mother
’
s
dream was to have a small art studio where she could give lessons too. With the
money Mel was paid for the album art, she was putting that toward her mother
’
s dream. And thanks to the promotion
of the upcoming Fallen Tuesday album, Mel's cover art was already raking in
interest for lessons.

“
I
can
’
t look away,
”
Mel said with a big smile on
her face.

Jake stared at Mel and nodded.
“
Neither can I.
”

Mel turned her head and squinted
her eyes.
“
You
’
re staring at me, Jake.
”

“
I
can
’
t help it,
”
Jake said.
“
Melanie
…
”

“
No
way. No.
”

Jake laughed.
“
What are you going to do about
it?
”

They came together and hugged. Jake
wrapped his arms around Mel and spun once as he kissed her. There was silence
all around, but in just a few hours, the air would be filled with music,
singing, and screaming fans.

“
I
can
’
t believe how things
happen,
”
Mel whispered with
her lips lingering near Jake
’
s.

“
I
try not to think about it,
”
Jake said.
“
It
’
ll drive you mad. Enjoy today
and look forward to tomorrow.
”

“
Poet.
”

“
Rockstar,
”
Jake said and laughed.

“
Good
save.
”

Jake held Mel
’
s face in his hands. The emotion
was so real that it was almost overwhelming.

A whistle came from above Jake. He
turned and looked, seeing Luke, Gray, and Trent.

“
What
are you two doing down there?
”
Luke asked.

“
Enjoying
life,
”
Jake called out.

“
When
you
’
re done enjoying, come
talk to us,
”
Gray said.

“
I
guess you need to go,
”
Mel
said, placing her hands on Jake
’
s
chest.
“
Not just for this
show, Jake, but your tour starts soon.
”

“
That
’
s okay. That
’
s part of our journey, remember?
The mess
…
the darkness
…
our eyes
…”

Mel smiled.
“
You know, you never told me where you
’
re planning on living.
”

“
I
don
’
t care. As long I
’
m with you.
”

“
You
’
re really getting rid of your
apartment?
”

“
Never
going back,
”
Jake said.
“
Going back is what caused the
mess in the first place. I
’
ll
only go forward.
”

“
My
apartment
’
s nothing
special,
”
Mel said.
“
It
’
s
a crammed loft.
”

“
It
has you,
”
Jake said.
“
Sounds perfect to me. If you
’
ll have me.
”

“
I
don
’
t know,
”
Mel said.
“
It
’
s
really made for one person. I mean, look at the shower situation
…
only one of us could ever take
a shower.
”

Jake smiled. He gently kissed Mel
’
s lips.
“
But we already solved that problem, sweetheart.
”

“
Oh?
”

“
We
will just have to shower together. All the time.
”

Jake kissed Mel again. And again.
She finally pushed him away and giggled as she strutted away, feeling
really
good
about herself. She wanted the feeling forever.   

*

Jake saw the guys standing at the
end of the hall. Luke ran a hand through his hair and Trent had his hands on
his hips. Gray's arms were folded, and he was staring out the window. It didn
’
t look like a pleasant scene at
all. Jake licked his lips and could still taste Mel.

He approached his band and as he
started to say something, he realized Mack wasn
’
t
there.

“
Hey
…
where
’
s Mack?
”

Luke looked and the mood got even
more somber.
“
Drunk.
”

“
Drunk?
”

“
Drunk,
”
Gray said.
“
Working up a good one in the
back room over there.
”

“
Shit,
”
Jake whispered.

“
Every
year,
”
Trent said.
“
Every damn year. And there
’
s nothing we can do about it. We
just have to ride this out and hope for the best. I can
’
t stand it.
”

“
He
’
s going to hurt himself soon,
”
Luke said.

“
Let
me check on him,
”
Jake
said.

Trent took a step and Jake put his
hand out.

“
What?
”
Trent asked.

“
Let
me go by myself,
”
Jake
said.
“
If we all approach
him he
’
s going to flip. We
have a radio interview and a concert tonight.
”

“
And
he needs to start drinking some damn water,
”
Luke said. He made a fist and punched the wall.

Luke walked in the opposite
direction of Jake. Jake opened a door and found Mack sitting on a couch with
his legs sprawled out. He was burly, angry, and the flask in his hand proved
what the rest of the guys had said.

“
Mack,
”
Jake said.

“
Brother,
”
he said.

He looked at Jake and his eyes were
a mess.

“
Why
are you drinking like this? We have a show, man
…”

“
Because
I can,
”
Mack said. He
lifted the flask.
“
Cheers,
my brother. Cheers. You
’
ve
found yourself life and love out there, huh?
”

“
Yeah,
it would appear so,
”
Jake
said.
“
What about you,
Mack? What
’
s happening
right now?
”

Mack drank from the flask and then
closed it. Jake watched Mack
’
s
coordination closely. He managed to close the flask without a problem. He hoped
Mack would make it through the show.

“
You
know we have a show, brother,
”
Jake said.

“
Hell
yeah, man. Hell yeah.
”

“
We
’
re better off sober with these
shows.
”

“
Sober.
None of us are sober.
”

Mack swung his feet off the couch
and stood up. He lumbered over Jake and stared down. There was always anger in
Mack
’
s eyes, something dark
and hidden lingering. And it was growing.

“
Mack,
”
Jake said.
“
We
’
re
so close to this album and tour. So close to being back on the road, doing what
you love most.
”

Mack put a hand to Jake
’
s shoulder and squeezed.
“
What I love most
…
that
’
s gone, brother. Look at the calendar.
”

Jake swallowed hard and gave a nod.
There were no words for Mack right now and maybe there would be no words for a
little while. Mack loved the band, the music, and the road. But there was one
thing that Mack loved more, and the anniversary of her death was right around
the corner
…