A Shining Light (18 page)

“I would not have suggested his name if I had known.” I had seen Christoph only yesterday. “When will he leave for his year of separation?”

“Sister Anna said they have received permission to marry, but the elders haven't decided about their separation yet. There is a need for Christoph in West, so who can say—the elders may let him remain here, which would be very nice for both of them.”

“Ja, for sure it would.” I massaged my forehead and tried to think of some other prospect. “Maybe by tomorrow I can think of someone else.”

She folded her arms against her waist and glared at me. “What about you, Dirk? You're the one I want to help me, not Christoph or August or anyone else.”

“
Me
? But I—”

“But you are what? In love with Andrea?”

She didn't give me a chance to admit or deny her question.

“Well, I am in love with Benjamin, so that makes it ideal. My Vater will think it is perfect. He has always wanted us to be together.”

“Ja, but what if your Vater discovers this is only a trick? I think he would be angry with both of us. There would be no defense for our behavior. Both of us would be demoted to children's church—or maybe forbidden to attend Sunday meetings.”

The longer we talked, the more I disliked this idea. Unless a member remained home due to illness, being absent from Sunday meetings meant only one thing—the elders had deemed your misdeeds especially serious. Being relegated to children's church would be an embarrassment, but not as serious as being banned from meetings. And even more important, this idea of deceit went against all of our teachings—against God's Word.

“I do not think—”

Greta grasped my arm. “It is my only chance, Dirk. Please say you will pretend to care for me. You haven't been anywhere with the rest of us since Andrea's husband arrived. We will have fun, like the old days, but we should not tell anyone we are playacting. If my Vater found out, he would be furious.” She tightened her hold. “Please help me.”

Greta was my friend. I did not have the strength to refuse her. But what would Andrea think?

On several occasions over the next two days, I considered telling Greta that our decision had been made in haste and we should consider a different solution. The names of other single men had come to mind, and any one of them would doubtless satisfy her father's wish for a mature, conscientious, godly husband for Greta. Perhaps she might actually fall in love with one of them—something that would never occur between the two of us.

I had not been surprised by her father's reluctance to give the couple his blessing. Benjamin was a godly young man, but his behavior often appeared immature and childlike. He enjoyed laughter, fun, and practical jokes more than most, and while Greta found him charming, her father considered Benjamin's carefree attitude unsuitable for a grown man. If Benjamin had behaved in a more restrained manner in the presence of the older men, I would not be in this predicament.

Though it didn't appear to deter Greta in the least, the thought of being banned from meetings continued to plague me, and after prayer meeting I hurried to her side. “We need to talk.”

She smiled at me in such a beguiling manner that I took a backward step. “Vater is watching us. You should not back away from me.” She tipped her head to one side and batted her eyelashes.

“Stop doing that, Greta.” I glanced over my shoulder and caught sight of Andrea. She was watching us as closely as Greta's father was. My stomach clenched. “Did you speak to Andrea about this plan of yours?”

“Nein. For either of us to tell anyone would be a mistake. It is too easy to forget and let things slip. She might mention our plan to Sister Erma, and she would tell my Mutter, who would then tell my Vater, and then—”

“And then we would both be banned from meetings for weeks, maybe months.” My muscles tightened at the thought.

“Ja, so you should keep your lips sealed.” Greta's charming smile returned as her father and mother approached.

“Brother Dirk! Is a fine evening, ja?” Greta's father lightly slapped my shoulder. “You should walk back to the house with Greta. I am sure she would enjoy your company.”

Unless I moved quickly, my opportunity would disappear. I needed to call a halt to this idea before it went any further. I came alongside her and then motioned for her to fall back a short distance. “I have decided this arrangement is not a gut plan. It goes against everything we believe.”

Any sign of her earlier smile disappeared. “There is no reason to change things. The plan is perfect.” Her angry words hissed on the evening breeze.

Startled by her animosity, I returned her frown. “It is a very bad idea. Now that I have had more time to think, I cannot agree to
deceive your Vater. If you are determined to carry out this idea, you will need to find someone else.”

She stopped midstep and glared at me. “You already agreed, Dirk. You cannot go back on your word. Besides, you know I have no interest in anyone other than Benjamin. And how could I tell another man what I have told you? They would never agree to spend time with me if they knew it was only a scheme so that I could eventually marry Benjamin.”

I sighed. It would do no good to tell her she might find another man more appealing once Benjamin moved from the village. She had considered this plan for a far longer time and in much more detail than I had imagined. “Let me have some time to think about some other idea.”

Her mother stopped and glanced over her shoulder. “Greta! You should continue walking.”

She dismissed my suggestion with a shake of her head. “You are supposed to be my friend. Friends help each other, Dirk.”

We were within hearing distance of her parents, so I lowered my voice and leaned closer as we walked. “It is unfair to deceive your Vater, and I do not think our heavenly Father would approve of such a decision, either. There must be some other way.”

“There is not. Besides, I told my Vater you asked to take me on a picnic next Sunday afternoon.” She smiled. “He was very pleased to give his approval.”

I gasped. “But I did not invite you to go to a picnic next Sunday. I have not invited you to go anywhere.”

“I know, but I wanted to move forward with the plan. You had already agreed, and I decided the sooner we began, the sooner I could tell my Vater that my feelings for Benjamin have not changed.” Her eyes flashed with anger. “Don't make a fool of me, Dirk.”

My stomach muscles tightened. “I will go to the picnic, but only as your friend, and you should not take this plan any further. Do not tell others we are courting, and understand that I will not ask for your father's permission to court you. If anyone asks, I will tell them we remain no more than friends.” I met her fiery gaze. “I do not want you to tell others untruths that will later cause you embarrassment. You understand what I am telling you, ja?”

She clenched her lips together and marched off without an answer. There was no doubt I had angered her. If I had refused to help her when she first asked, I wouldn't be in the middle of this precarious situation. Though she hadn't agreed, I would have to trust that Greta would go no further with her scheme.

Andrea

Sister Erma bustled into the kitchen on Sunday wearing her black gauze cap with delicate black tatted edging and her sheer black wool shoulder shawl. Tucked in the crook of her arm, she carried her Bible and
Psalterspiel
, the large book that contained the psalms and hymns sung during Sunday meetings.

She stopped in front of the kitchen door. “Before long, the snow will fly and I will need to replace this lightweight shawl with my heavy one. Each year the seasons pass with greater speed. As you get older, you will notice.” Her eyes clouded with a hint of sadness as she turned to face me. “You have any questions before Lukas and I depart for meeting?”

I shook my head. “Lukas is waiting for you on the porch.” I had given him strict instructions to remain on the porch. The grass remained wet with early morning dew, and I didn't want him going to meeting with wet or dirty shoes.

“The two of you are going to visit Fred this afternoon?”

“If you do not need me to help in the kitchen.” Greta normally helped prepare supper on Sundays, and I assumed she would do so today.

“Greta is going to attend a picnic, and I told her I could make do without her if she did not want to come back early.” Sister Erma shifted the books to her other arm. “She has been sad since Benjamin moved to Main, and I thought the picnic would be gut for her.”

I was surprised to learn that Greta would be attending a picnic this afternoon. In the past, she had always told me whenever she had special plans. “I can come back early. Fred will understand.” I gestured toward her arm. “Have Lukas carry the Bible and
Psalterspiel
for you. It will make him feel important.”

She chuckled as the bell tolled from the village tower. “And it will make the walk to meeting much easier, too. We better hurry or we will be late.”

I rushed to the door as she stepped from the porch. “Should I prepare a picnic basket for Greta?”

Sister Erma turned. “If you have time, that would be nice. Otherwise, she can see to it after we return from meeting. Pack enough for two. Brother Dirk will be escorting her.”

“Dirk?” I'd barely whispered his name, but Sister Erma heard me. She turned and gave a firm nod.

“Is gut, ja? I think Brother Dirk will cheer Sister Greta, and I think it will go the other way, too.” She twisted her fingers back and forth to emphasize her point.

My stomach squeezed tighter than a pair of new leather shoes. I wanted to shout that it was not good, but I forced a smile and gave a slight nod before turning away. Had Greta avoided telling me because she knew the news would give rise to questions—and
injured feelings? Did she believe it would be easier for me to discover the information from someone else? I caught my lower lip between my teeth. Those ideas weren't the reason.

Instead, I was certain she hadn't mentioned the outing because she knew I would question her for details. And if that was her supposition, she was correct. Although she had every right to go on a picnic with Dirk, her secretive behavior caused my thoughts to scatter.

While the two kitchen helpers peeled and sliced potatoes, I prepared the horseradish sauce to be served with the beef. My nose and eyes watered as I grated the pungent root. Usually the junior girls would have been assigned the task, but today I wanted an excuse for my tears. I had lost Dirk as a friend, and now it seemed I would lose Greta, as well.

While the girls went into the dining room to set the tables, I sliced bread and slathered it with butter before wrapping it in a cloth and placing it alongside a small packet of sliced beef in the wicker basket. I doubted they would want to take a jar of soup, but Dirk would likely want some of the fried potatoes and some of the horseradish sauce for his beef.

The dinner bell tolled as I placed the basket on a worktable at the far end of the kitchen. I hurried to check that the girls had completed preparations in the dining room and then returned to the kitchen. I wanted to be present when Greta arrived.

Sister Erma was the first to enter the kitchen. “I will be downstairs as soon as I change my dress and shawl.”

“No need to rush. Everything is ready.”

She glanced over her shoulder. “The food is not ready until I have tasted it. You learned this a long time ago, did you not, Sister Andrea?”

I smiled as she disappeared from the room without waiting for
my answer. On my first day in the kitchen, I had been warned that nothing should be placed in the serving bowls until it had passed Sister Erma's taste test. “If you put food in the bowls and it needs more seasoning, then it wastes too much time,” she'd explained.

Sister Erma usually decreed that the foods prepared by Greta or me needed more salt or pepper, or perhaps some additional dill or extra chives. At first, her critique of my food preparation had frustrated me, but it hadn't taken long for me to learn that her assessments were correct. I doubted she would find my horseradish sauce perfect. She considered sauces and gravies her specialties.

The hinges on the back door creaked, and I turned to see Greta entering the kitchen. I moved to the far end of the kitchen and stood beside the table, my hand resting on the wicker basket. “Is this what you've come for?”

Her smile lacked its usual warmth. “You did not need to prepare the basket. I told Sister Erma I could do it after meeting.”

“Sister Erma tells me you are going on a picnic with Brother Dirk.”

She crossed the room, but I continued to rest my hand on the handle of the basket. Her gaze settled on my hand. “Ja. Unless he decides on another spot, I think we are going to the pond.”

“Why did you not tell me you and Dirk were going on a picnic this afternoon? When I asked you if you had any plans for today, you never mentioned your outing. Why is that, Greta?”

She frowned. “Because it slipped my mind. I do not understand why you are annoyed that I am going out for the afternoon. Sister Erma gave me permission.”

“And is your father happy now?”

Greta perched her hands on her hips. “What do you mean by that question?”

I knew she understood what I meant, but since she asked, I
forged on. “He wants you to marry Dirk. You told me that when I first arrived. Now that Benjamin is gone, it appears that you have set your cap for Dirk.”

“What does ‘set your cap' mean?”

“That you intend to win his affection and marry him.”

She reached for the basket, but her lips remained sealed.

“So it is true. When I first asked you about Dirk, you told me that you were friends and you thought of him as a brother, nothing more. It seems you've changed your mind.”

She tugged on the basket. “You have a husband, Andrea. What happens between Dirk and me should not concern you. Not at all.”

I released my hold and took a backward step. She was right. Shortly after Fred arrived, I had told myself that Dirk deserved to be happy, to marry and have children. But I hadn't meant it. Not unless it included me.