A Year of You (21 page)

“I want to feel you,” she whispered. “Make me feel, West.”


“I don’t want to hurt you,” he replied, drawing his hand up and down her side. Her skin was so soft, magnetic. He reached around her hip and delved into her hot, slick center. She gasped aloud and arched her hips into his hand.

Without warning she tensed and froze. “West—” she whispered. Her voice shook.
She’s scared
, he thought.

“Mattie?”


“Don’t break my heart,” she said, a plea that cut to his core.


“I won’t. I told you, I won’t hurt you.”

She leaned against him again, still tense, still scared. West touched his lips to her cheek. With the hand that wasn’t still inside her pink cotton panties, still massaging her, he held her to him. “Baby, I’m not like whoever’s hurt you before.”

She nodded and gasped, her body arching against him. She was so close to coming. He could feel her muscles trembling, the strengthening contractions of her body around his hand.

“I want you to,” she said breathlessly, dumbfounding him. “What?”


“Hurt me. I need you to. I want you to push me around.”

“Shit, Mattie.”

Abruptly, she broke away from him, arms over her breasts. “I’m sorry, West. I really am, I just sort of let that slip—I know I’ve got issues—I probably just completely freaked you out.”

“Whoa, no, Mattie. It was just sort of something you don’t hear from too many women.”

“I’m sorry.”


“No. No, you’re not. I’m not.”


She looked up, surprised. “You’re not?”

“Not in the least. I got feelings and stuff inside me that I’ve never been able to explore.”


“You sound like a chick.” She laughed softly.
”Explore your feelings…” She cut off short when he popped her ever so softly on the cheek, just hard enough to sting. Her eyes widened, flaring with a hot burst of lust. It amazed him how he was able to read that in her face, her body.

“Don’t make fun of me.”

“Sorry.”

“No, you’re not.” He turned her around and walked her to the bedroom. He was close to trembling; he was so overwhelmed by the sense of possession and release of all the things he’d pent up for as long as he could remember.

And Mattie wanted all of it. The way she submitted to his hand guiding into the bedroom, the way she glanced over her shoulder for approval when she opened the bedroom door. He should have seen it that night in the Navigator the first time she went down on him, in the way she took him into her mouth, so eager to please him.

Yeah, it wasn’t going to take much to fall in love with this woman.

Once they were in the bedroom, he smacked her ass, hard enough to elicit a yelp from her. “Bend over the edge of the bed.”

She complied, looking up at him over her shoulder.

“Do you know how amazing you look, standing like that?” West began to stroke himself slowly, as he followed the line of her legs, the dip and curve of her ass and back, the way her eyes glittered in the blue moonlight coming in through the window. He could smell her, vanilla and sex, sweet as sugar.

The way she was looking at him was just plain wrong. Dirty. Wicked. And making him harder than he’d ever been before.

West ran his fingers down her spine, pushing her lower back down and urging her ass higher. Being so close to her, feeling the heat radiating from her body, smelling that heady scent, was driving him mad, and all he could think about was taking her, making her his.

Even if it was just for the dark hours. In the light of day, things were different between them. It was all just business.

“West?” Her voice broke through his thoughts.
He squeezed her hips. “You’re beautiful like this, but I need to feel you under me.”
She nodded and crawled on to the bed, stretching out on her back. West followed her, kneeling between her legs, hands on her thighs. She was solid beneath him, real, ready, and waiting.
“Matilyn West,” he said, sliding his hands up her body, stopping to cup and fondle her breasts. He tasted one nipple, then the other, laving it until she arched her chest into his face. His fingers slid through the wiry curls of her pubic hair and dipped into her hot, wet folds.


“West. West.” Her fingernails dug into his biceps.
He couldn’t take much more.

“Are you sure you’re ready for this?”


“If you stop, I’ll hurt you. Really bad.” She moved against his fingers, encouraging his fingers to move faster, harder.


“As if. This will change things, you know.”


“Wait, condom!”


“Shit. Shit. I don’t know if I have any—”
He leaned over the edge of the bed and plundered through the nightstand. He came up with a box of prophylactics, but when he shook it, it was empty.

“Ah, damn it.”
Mattie sighed and propped herself up on her elbows. “All the wild sex you and Em had, and you don’t have any?”


“Mattie, we didn’t—I mean, we—” Dang it, this was embarrassing. Most women would be relieved to hear that he hadn’t touched anyone sexually in over a year, but knowing Mattie, she’d make fun of him.

Wait! Who’s the man here?
West mentally rolled his eyes at himself. What’d that matter? It was still fricking shameful to be dating a woman for three years and only tapped it a couple of times. Even when she’d been so drunk she would have humped a fire hydrant.

She grinned and turned on her side, holding herself up on one elbow. Her other hand rested on her lovely hip. “Don’t tell me you didn’t ever have sex with her.”

“Well, yeah, we did, but I was always busy, and she was always busy, and it only happened a couple times.”

She laughed and rolled her eyes at him. “West, you are a great guy, you know that?”

“Are you being sarcastic?” He sat up and crossed his arms over his chest. He was getting a little irritated with her twinkly, dancing eyes and the way she was fighting a smile.

“No.”
He flicked on the lamp next to the bed. Her eyes had those little wrinkles around them that meant she was smiling inside, even if her mouth wasn’t. It amazed him, once again, how well he was able to read her.

She scooted closer, sliding off the bed and kneeling between his knees. She took wicked liberties with his body, licking his nipples, biting them, kissing a straight line down his torso until she got to his dick.

“I meant,” she said, bypassing little West and going straight for the balls. When she was done doing terrible things to him, she said, “You’ve held on to that horrible chick for years. Even though she’s not even putting out and she’s getting it from everybody but you. You’ve stuck by her. It’s...I just hope that one day, somebody wants me to be his that badly.”


She went down on him, taking him deep into her throat, pulling back, doing those little tongue-flicks that drove him wild.
Even though his brain was hollering,
You’re mine!
he couldn’t voice the words. He laced his fingers through her hair, and he had to breathe through gritted teeth from the things she was doing to him. He tightened his fingers into fists, knowing he was pulling hard, and that she was loving it. The more it hurt, the better the head got.

He was so close...
No, he wanted to be inside her when he came.
He hauled her up and pushed her down on the bed, gouging her arms accidentally with his fingernails.
“What about protection?”


“Unless you’re insisting on it, I don’t give a fuck. We’re married. We can deal with the consequences later.”


Nodding, desperate, she reached out for him. West sank into her outstretched arms. Her hand reached between them, guided him into her tight, hot entrance. Never had a woman felt this good, been this hot, been this tight around him. “Oh, shit, Mattie.”

He wasn’t going to last long. Mattie scraped her fingers up his back, digging in deep. The pain lit him up, sparked something inside him. He withdrew from her and urged her on to her belly.

Her body conformed to his, her hips rising off the mattress a little higher with each thrust. The soft cries did as much to him as her body was doing, and he didn’t think he could stop pounding into her if he wanted to. She met him stroke for stroke, taking him higher and higher until he exploded within her.

For a long precious moment he couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think, couldn’t do anything but hang on tight. The moment was transcendental.

When his muscles finally unclenched, he collapsed on Mattie, wrapped his arms around her. Together they moved on their sides, facing each other. It felt wrong being separated from her. She must have felt the same way, because she threw her leg over his hip and wiggled around, using her hand and her hips, until he was nudging her entrance once more.

“Can I have a turn now?” She touched his lips with hers, soft little kisses that he barely felt.

“Gimme a second. I think I got hit by a train.”
Her little kisses peppered his lips, his cheeks, while her hands slid into his hair. Her hips moved slowly, just enough to cause enough heat to keep his cock interested. The angle was awkward, and he wasn’t quite long enough to stay fully inside her.

She rolled over and kissed his chest. Her lips meandered up his throat to his jaw, finally to his lips. The kiss was enough to wake him up, get him ready once more. He held her close and kissed her back until they were both breathless. He couldn’t keep his hands off her heavy breasts.

Grabbing her hips, he rolled to his back, pulling her down firmly. She gasped and he felt her muscles contract around his penis. West sucked in a breath, moved his hips in a figure-eight. This time, she gasped and ground against him.

He hadn’t been this deep inside a woman in ages. Shit, never! He imagined her bent over the edge of the bed. He pictured himself even deeper inside her, making her holler out his name.

“I want to watch you,” he said, grinning crookedly at her. She smiled back and he felt powerful. Hot blood raced through him. “You are so tight,” he whispered, bucking his hips slowly. “It’s been a long time, hasn’t it?”

“Yeah.” She was breathy from what he was doing to her. She picked up on his rhythm and adjusted her legs so she could rise and fall with him. “Watch me do what?”

“Touch yourself. I want to see your face when you come with me inside you like this.”

Mattie laughed softly, a laugh that turned into a gasp when he gripped her hips and pulled her down hard. She yelped. “You’re huge, West! Feels like you’re poking my stomach from inside!” Still laughing, she raised herself up on her knees and braced herself with one hand on the headboard. Her hips moved in a subtle figure-eight as she rode him.

“Come on, now, hand down there,” he said.


“I’ve never really done this in front of somebody.”


“You do it nearly every night with that damn vibrator. Speaking of which—” He flailed for the nightstand but couldn’t quite get the drawer open.

“I’ll get it.” Mattie leaned over, never rising off of him. The angle of her body rubbed against him in ways that made his eyes roll back in his head. All too soon she was back, holding the green vibe. “I want another one. One of the little pocket-rocket kind.”

She turned it on and slipped it between their bodies, into their combined wetness. The vibration echoed through her body into his, making him clench his jaw and curl his toes. “I’ll get you one—no, I’ll get you ten—tomorrow—”

Her body clenched around him and her breathing quickened. He’d never been this ready to go twice in such a short amount of time, even back in his horny teenage days. Abruptly, West dumped her off. With her ass on his thighs, his knees under her hips, he couldn’t fight the animal in him. He plowed into her with a ferocity that made her cry out, over and over again. He was hitting it hard, and she loved it. She responded, wrapping her legs around his waist. “Keep using that damn thing,” he grunted when the sensation of the vibrator lessened.

“I think the batteries are dying,” she replied, breathless.

He had to feel her come before he did. He had to feel her body tightening around his dick like it did his hand.

The vibration stopped altogether. “Damn it, Mattie. Just make it happen, then.” He let go of her hips and pinched both of her nipples, twisting them until she cried out. When he released her, she grabbed his hands and put them right back.

“Hurt me,” she said. “I want to feel it.”

West flashed her a wicked grin. It was no-holds-barred. He knew he had to be hurting her from the force of his thrusts, but even as she cried out she was trying to get closer, trying to pull him in deeper. He ravaged her body, withdrawing from her—that made her cry out louder than it did when he bit or pinched.

Release was forgotten, even though his dick was so hard it hurt and the insistence of orgasm seemed to be right there. He ground his teeth and slowed down. He pulled out until just the tip of his cock remained inside her.

He concentrated on her breasts, on eliciting the sharp gasps of pain, or making her eyes flutter open. He could feel her finger swirling around her clit, gentle rhythmic pokes that were threatening to drive him crazy.

“West, please, I need you,” she moaned.


“All right, baby.”
He plunged into her, driving deep, knowing he was only going to last a moment inside her. She worked her clit for just a second before she crested, consuming him. The force of her orgasm rocked through him. “

“Ah, Mattie, Mattie,” he grunted before he lost the ability to think coherently.

Chapter Fourteen

“We should probably talk,” West said. Mattie’s heart sank as she carried his toast to the table. His coffee was probably cold. She reached for the mug, but he caught her hand. “Sit, babe.”

She sat and waited for him to tell her the night before had been nothing. That Emeline meant more. She grew numb as she disassociated herself from what had happened. He was going to tell her that it had been a mistake. He’d been too quiet all morning. Granted he wasn’t much of a talker, but it was still unusual for him to be that quiet.

And he was late to work. Something was going on inside his head. “I don’t love you,” he said.
Unsure of how to reply, Mattie just said, “I didn’t think you did.”

“I don’t want to love you.”

Ouch.

“And it’s not why you think, Mattie.”