Alien in Chief

Raves for the
Alien
novels:

“From alternate realities to alternate galaxies, Koch takes us on the wildest adventures. But it is the camaraderie between the characters that keeps the over-the-top tale grounded and compelling.”

—
RT Book Reviews
(top pick)

“Koch still pulls the neat trick of quietly weaving in plot threads that go unrecognized until they start tying together—or snapping. This is a hyperspeed-paced addition to a series that shows no signs of slowing down.”

—
Publishers Weekly

“Aliens, danger, and romance make this a fast-paced, wittily written sf romantic comedy.”

—
Library Journal

“Gini Koch's Kitty Katt series is a great example of the lighter side of science fiction. Told with clever wit and non-stop pacing . . . it blends diplomacy, action and sense of humor into a memorable reading experience.”

—
Kirkus

“The action is nonstop, the snark flies fast and furious. . . . Another fantastic addition to an imaginative series!”

—Night Owl Sci-Fi (top pick)

“Ms. Koch has carved a unique niche for herself in the sci-fi-romance category with this series. My only hope is that it lasts for a very long time.”

—Fresh Fiction

“This delightful romp has many interesting twists and turns as it glances at racism, politics, and religion en route . . . will have fanciers of cinematic sf parodies referencing
Men in Black, Ghost Busters, and X-Men.”

—
Booklist
(starred review)

“I am a huge fan of Gini Koch, and this series. I adore the world building. I love the sarcasm, banter, romance, mystery, action, and a slew of superhero-like characters that stand up against evil wherever they go.”

—Gizmo's Reviews

DAW Books Presents GINI KOCH's
Alien Novels:

TOUCHED BY AN ALIEN

ALIEN TANGO

ALIEN IN THE FAMILY

ALIEN PROLIFERATION

ALIEN DIPLOMACY

ALIEN VS. ALIEN

ALIEN IN THE HOUSE

ALIEN RESEARCH

ALIEN COLLECTIVE

UNIVERSAL ALIEN

ALIEN SEPARATION

ALIEN IN CHIEF

CAMP ALIEN

(coming in 2016)

Copyright © 2015 by Jeanne Cook.

All Rights Reserved.

Cover art by Daniel Dos Santos.

Cover design by G-Force Design.

DAW Book Collectors No. 1713.

Published by DAW Books, Inc.
375 Hudson Street, New York, NY 10014.

All characters and events in this book are fictitious.

Any resemblance to persons living or dead is strictly coincidental.

The scanning, uploading, and distribution of this book via the Internet or via any other means without the permission of the publisher is illegal, and punishable by law. Please purchase only authorized electronic editions, and do not participate in or encourage the electronic piracy of copyrighted materials. Your support of the author's rights is appreciated.

Nearly all the designs and trade names in this book are registered trademarks. All that are still in commercial use are protected by United States and international trademark law.

ISBN 978-0-698-16171-9

DAW TRADEMARK REGISTERED

U.S. PAT. AND TM. OFF. AND FOREIGN COUNTRIES

—MARCA REGISTRADA

HECHO EN U.S.A.

This is dedicated to the ones I love. All of you.
You all know who you
are.

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

As always, love and thanks to my fantastic editor, Sheila Gilbert, my awesome agent, Cherry Weiner, my amazing crit partner, Lisa Dovichi, and the best beta reader in the West, Mary Fiore. Cannot do this without you guys. Okay, I can, but everything I do is better because of the four of you.

Love and thanks to all the good folks at DAW Books and Penguin Random House, to all my fans around the globe, my Hook Me Up! Gang, members of Team Gini new and old, all Alien Collective Members in Very Good Standing, Members of the Stampeding Herd, Twitter followers, Facebook fans and friends, Pinterest followers, the fabulous bookstores that support me, and all the wonderful fans who come to my various book signings and conference panels—you're all the best and I wouldn't want to do this without each and every one of you along for the ride.

My list of those I want to give special thanks to is normally pretty darned long, but time is tight (I'm late again, what were the odds?) and so I'm going with the time honored “If I thanked you before I'm thanking you again, even more so” approach. So, if your name is not listed, I still love you and thank you for all you do, I just ran out of time to shout your name from the rooftops again.

So, special love and extra shout-outs to: my awesome assistants, Joseph Gaxiola and Colette Chmiel for continuing to always keep me sane, on time, and efficient; Adrian & Lisa Payne, Hal & Dee Astell, and Duncan & Andrea Rittschof for continuing to always show up everywhere, with smiling faces and books (and Poofs) in hand, ensuring anywhere I'm at is always a warm, fun place to be; Scott
Johnson for being the nicest bed & breakfast spot and the oasis of calm in my book tours; Tom & Libby Thomas, Pat & Barbara Michel, Koren Cota, Chrysta Stuckless, Missy Katano, Christina Callahan, Amy Thacker, Jan Robinson, Mariann Asanuma, Koleta Parsley, Mikel Dornhecker, Carien Ubink, Terry Smith, Joan Du, James Du, Michael Shelton, Janet Armentani, Colette Chmiel, Anne Taylor, Heidi Berthiaume, and Shawn Sumrall for bestowing beautiful, supportive, wonderful, and delicious things upon me what seems like all the time; Robert Palsma for continuing to like everything I do; all the fans who travel from far away to see the me, like Missy Katano, Michele Ogle, and Paul Sparks; and for a ton of physical labor and emotional support during cons, special love to Duncan and Andrea Rittschof, Terry Smith, Missy Katano, Brad Jensen, Joseph Gaxiola, Edward Pulley, and Kathi Schreiber.

Always last in the list but never in my heart, thanks to my Husband in Chief, Steve, and our First (and only) Daughter, Veronica. You're the best in the world and I love you both more than words can say.

A
H, TO SEE THE WORLD,
travel to exotic locations, and meet interesting people. Sounds great, doesn't it?

Of course, most people get to plan their exotic trips and exciting vacations. I get yanked into mine, almost always against my will and often through literally being dragged there by powerful forces unknown to man. Well, okay, known to some men, and women, too. Hey, can't blame a girl for adding a little drama.

Anyway, vacations are a little different when you're seeing new solar systems, traveling to exotic planets, and meeting lots of interesting aliens, many of whom are trying to kill you. Well, of course, as I look at my life over the past six years or so, that just kind of sounds like business as usual.

Oh, it's not all negative, though. I've gotten to save the world so many times I've lost count. Saved the galaxy at least once. Saved other solar systems, too. I'm just that kind of can-do girl.

And though discovering aliens were living on Earth came as a shock six years ago, nowadays it's almost commonplace. Almost.

“My” aliens are all from Alpha Four in the Alpha Centauri solar system, and they're all drop-dead gorgeous,
super brainy, and come loaded with a lot of special talents including hyperspeed, faster regeneration, super strength, and then some. They really are all that and a Bag of Super Deluxe Just Like the Justice League and the X-Men Chips.

Other aliens seem split between the Friends of Earth or Want To Destroy All Other Life Forms factions. So far, we and the Friends of Earth side have been doing okay, despite the fact that Earth itself has a plethora of cackling evil geniuses, multinational crime lords, and cuckoo megalomaniacs. We could export them, we have so many.

Not that I am for one minute suggesting we should. We have enough problems out there, why give our enemies a chance to gang up on us? I mean, more than they already do.

One of those evil geniuses in particular is the proverbial thorn in our sides: The Mastermind. Someone we all trusted. Someone we all wanted to eliminate with extreme prejudice. And someone who—until we can find all his strongholds, and all his plans, and all his cohorts, and make sure that he doesn't have some awful doomsday plot or three that will activate if he dies suddenly—we cannot touch.

I'd thought I'd have taken him down a year ago, but the cosmos had other plans and, instead, we got to avert a gigantic system-wide civil war over in Alpha Centauri while also stopping yet another huge invasion of Earth. We did get some cool parting gifts in the bargain, including two clones of former enemies who are now on our side, plus some alien pigdogs and foxcats. I'm in the minority in thinking these made everything else worthwhile, but some people just can't see the roses for the trees. Or some such.

We also made a lot of new alien friends. Many of whom want to visit Earth. Because, to them, Earth is that exotic
tropical island way out in the middle of nowhere where a person can just relax and get away from it all.

Yeah, I know, right? They're thinking they're going to waste away in “Margaritaville,” but we're a whole lot more like “Welcome to the Jungle.” After all, there's a reason it took Axl Rose twenty years to write “Chinese Democracy.” And a classified reason for why it had to suck. But I digress . . .