All She Wants for Christmas (12 page)

It made him wonder why. He wanted to ask, but it wasn’t his business.

“Not that any man’s seen my underwear for a very long time,” she said in answer to his unspoken question. “I just have a thing for lingerie.”

His lips lifted. “No woman’s seen mine for a long time either. But the only lingerie I have a thing for is yours.”

She sat up and reached for the button of his jeans. “How disappointing. And I was so hoping?”

“Does Calvin count?”

She waited while he kicked his boots off, then drew his zipper down, her gaze meeting his as she shoved his jeans to the floor. “Calvin definitely counts.”

When she helped him divest himself of his Calvins, he pulled his shirt off and climbed onto the bed, way more interested in what she was wearing. He smoothed his hands over the hills and valleys of her bra, paying attention to her breathing, the way her eyes went all glassy when her nipples peaked and hardened. He swept his fingers over the cups, seeing the buds of her nipples arching against the silk.

Leaning over her, he took a taste of her through her bra.

“Ethan,” she said, her voice soft and buttery as she slid her fingers into his hair. He drew the cups down to taste her, teasing her with his tongue and his mouth until she arched her hips against him, letting him know she was ready for more.

Pleasuring her was so easy because she was so responsive with her body, and he loved touching her. He moved down her body and slid his hands over the silken softness of her panties, rewarded with a rush of unintelligible words from her lips. Ethan was pretty sure they were all good words as he slid his hand inside her panties and took her to the edge, watching her face as she came apart for him, shuddering out a cry that held his name.

She was undoing him with every minute he spent with her. When she took off her bra and panties and climbed on top of him, taking control, he might have died a little.

And when she leaned over, her breasts sliding against his chest as she took his mouth and claimed him at the same time she took possession of him with her body, he knew for sure she was his, always had been and always would be. And neither time nor distance had ever changed that or ever would.

She held his hands and rocked against him, and he couldn’t remember ever being with a woman who surprised him, challenged him, or made him question his priorities more.

And when they came together, both of them holding tight to each other in the darkness of night, he knew then that no matter what, he was never going to let her go.

Because for the first time in his life he wondered just what he’d be wiling to give up to have Riley in his life forever.

After, they held each other in the dark, both of them quiet for awhile.

“Ethan?” she finally whispered.

“Yeah.”

“This time we’ve had together has been really amazing.”

“Yeah, it has.” His gut tightened. This might be an “It’s been great, but” kind of speech.

“I wish it could last forever.”

“Me too, Riley.”

He waited, but she didn’t say anything else, making him wonder if she hesitated because she didn’t want to hurt him, or if she was waiting for him to make the next move.

Hell, he’d never been very good at figuring out what women thought, or what they wanted.

It took awhile before he realized she’d fallen asleep.

While she slept, he got up and wandered the house, wondering how he was going to approach this, how he’d ever ask her to stay with him.

Hour after hour he walked from room to room, realizing he’d be asking her to make all the sacrifices. He’d be giving up nothing, and she’d have to give up everything, or at least make a hell of a lot of adjustments in her life.

Great for him. Not so great for her.

Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea after all. Maybe the best thing he could do for her was let her go, instead of presenting her with a no-win scenario, because it was his only option, which meant what he had to offer her was really nothing special.

Really, nothing at all.

Chapter Nine

Ethan woke Riley early the next morning. Like, before dawn kind of early. He said he had to get over to his parents to be there before Zoey woke so they could do the whole gifts and Santa thing. He wanted to take her with him, but Riley thought it would be best if he had Christmas morning alone with his daughter.

Plus, there was something she had to do, so she told him she was going to go back to the B and B, take a shower and change clothes, and then she’d drive over to his parents.

She’d read his hesitancy last night, and at first she was hurt. She’d been hoping for some kind of declaration from him. She thought she knew how he felt, knew for sure how she felt, and was determined not to be the first to say something.

But she realized she held the upper hand now, that the situation wasn’t at all the same now as it had been ten years ago.

He wasn’t going to ask her to stay. Not now, not when he knew she had so much at stake.

Silly men and their egos. Didn’t he realize she was in love with him?

And love always trumped everything, especially money and career. At least it did with her. And when you were in love, the rest of it could be worked out.

Not that she had any intention of walking away from her career. She wasn’t stupid.

But she had an idea, so when Ethan dropped her off, she ran upstairs and took a shower and dressed, then grabbed her guitar and got to work. It took a few hours, but she finally had everything figured out. She’d already been working on it for days, she realized.

She loaded the gifts she’d bought into the car and drove over to Ethan’s parents’ house. Brody opened the door and grabbed her, planting a short but deep kiss on her lips.

“Merry Christmas, Riley!” he said, clearly already deep into the rum punch.

She laughed. “Merry Christmas, Brody.”

He carried the gifts into the house for her while she greeted everyone. Zoey ran up and hugged her, waved some kind of fancily dressed doll in front of her face, then dashed off to play with all her new “stuff” as she called it, but extracted a promise from Riley that she’d come see all her presents as soon as she got settled and said hello.

“Coffee, hot chocolate, or rum punch?” Ethan’s mother asked.

“Actually, a cup of coffee sounds great, thanks.”

“With or without brandy or whiskey in it?” Ethan’s dad asked as he came up and hugged her.

“Oh, now you’re tempting me. How about a little brandy?”

“There’s a girl after my own heart.”

“There’s a girl who’ll be face down on the floor before lunch,” Ethan said. “Merry Christmas, Riley.” He pulled her into his arms and planted what Riley considered to be one seriously hot kiss on her lips. In front of his parents, and his brothers.

“Daddy, you kissed Riley.”

And his daughter.

He broke the kiss and grinned at his daughter. “I did. Is that okay?”

Zoey nodded. “Yup. Will you come take my game out of the package?”

“Sure, honey.” He shifted his gaze to Riley. “Sorry, Dad duty calls. Back in a sec.”

Apparently, Zoey was utterly unfazed about the kiss between her and Ethan. One hurdle down. And as she surveyed his parents and his brother, Wyatt just shrugged, Ethan’s mother beamed a smile, and his father grinned from ear to ear as he poured what Riley considered a face-down-on-the-floor-before-lunch dose of brandy into her coffee.

“You trying to get me drunk, Mr. Kent?”

He laughed and smacked her on the back. “Nah. Figured you’re a tough girl and you can take it. Drink up, it’ll put hair on your chest.”

“Now there’s an unattractive visual,” Wyatt grumbled, taking the bottle of whiskey and pouring it straight into the glass with a couple ice cubes.

“Too early for that, Wyatt,” his mother warned.

Wyatt kissed Mrs. Kent on the cheek. “I’m here. Isn’t that enough?”

“I suppose, but that’s all the whiskey you get today. Switch off to coffee after that.”

Wyatt nodded, but Riley caught the roll of his eyes as he walked away.

“He’s had it rough the past couple years,” she explained to Riley after he walked out. “But I sure wish he’d get over Cassandra, stop with the bitterness and move on with his life.”

“With some people it takes awhile.”

“You talking about yourself?”

Riley laughed. “I guess so. I carried a grudge for a long time.”

“But now you’re over it.”

“I did it all wrong, Mrs. Kent. Stacy. I wish I had known then what I know now. I would have done things differently.”

Ethan’s mother held up her hands. “No way to change the past or predict the future.”

“I made a mistake in running. I should have stood my ground and fought for Ethan.”

She smiled. “I’m glad to hear you say that. Did you tell him that?”

“Not exactly.”

Mrs. Kent rolled her eyes. “Hell’s bells. What is it with you kids not telling each other how you feel? You’re talking to the wrong person. Go. Go tell my son you love him.”

Riley smiled. “I will. Sometime today. I promise.”

She gave Ethan’s mother a quick hug, then wandered out to find Ethan. He was on the floor with Zoey, who was playing a handheld game while Ethan frowned over instructions.

“It says to reach Level two—”

“I’m already on Level four, Daddy,” Zoey said, not looking up from her game.

“Oh.” Ethan tossed the instructions in the pile of trash.

Riley laughed. “Technology is for children, you know.” She sat down on the floor on the other side of Zoey.

“So I’m beginning to understand.”

Riley watched Zoey play the game for a while, then Zoey handed it over to Riley to play.

She figured it out after a few rather embarrassing tries and Zoey showing her how it was done. Then she realized she wanted one of these handheld game devices, especially when Ethan showed her the catalog of software that went with it.

“It has cooking recipes. It tells you step-by-step instructions while you’re cooking. And here I thought it was a kid’s device.”

“It’s multifunctional for all ages,” Zoey said.

Riley looked at Ethan, then at Zoey. “How old are you again, kid?”

“Seven.”

“Are you sure? You’re awfully smart for seven.”

Zoey giggled. “That’s what my daddy says, too.”

Riley excused herself to help Mrs. Kent set the table for lunch. They ate an abundance of turkey and dressing with more side dishes than Riley could count. It was the best holiday home-cooked meal she’d had in ages. After they cleared the table and loaded the dishwasher, it was time to sit in the living room and Riley handed out the gifts she’d bought for everyone.

She’d bought Wyatt and Brody new coats, thick down ones that would be great for the job site. She gave Mr. and Mrs. Kent a new television because they’d been complaining their old one was about to give up the ghost. She gave Zoey a guitar and the little girl’s eyes widened. Then she squealed.

“Really?”

“You’re old enough, but you’ll have to take lessons.”

“I’ll practice every day. I want to play like you do.”

“You have a beautiful voice, Zoey. But you only have to play guitar if that’s what you want to do. Otherwise it can just sit in your room and you can look at it and think of me.”

She grinned. “Cool.”

“Now I have a gift for you,” Ethan said, interrupting her. “It’s not as nice as the gifts you gave my family, but I’ve been working on it for the past ten years.”

She tilted her head to the side. “You have?”

“Yeah. You seeing Zoey’s room last night reminded me, so I finished it today.”

He handed her a box. She opened it and inside was a carving much like the ones of Zoey’s Noah’s Ark animals. Only it was a woman sitting on a stool with a guitar.

“It looks just like you, Riley, when you’re singing and playing your guitar,” Zoey said.

Riley’s eyes filled with tears. She lifted her gaze to Ethan. “It does. Thank you. Thank you so much. It’s the best gift ever.”

Ethan leaned over and brushed his lips over hers. “I love you, Riley. I always have. I always will. I don’t have much to offer, but what I have is yours. A home. A family. My family. My love. Forever. I want you with me. I want you to be a part of my life.”

Her heart swelled and soared. The words she needed to hear made joy spring from every pore, from every fiber of her body.

She sniffed, fighting back the tears. “I have a gift for you as well, Ethan.”

She went to get her guitar. “I thought about what it meant to come back here again. To come back and see you again. But now I realize that seeing you was what I needed, and what I wanted the most. And also what I was most afraid of.

“I ran once, but I want you to know I’m never running again, no matter how hard it gets. I love you, Ethan.”

She started the song, the music perfectly clear in her head, soft melody, heart-filled strains of love pouring from her guitar as she sang only to the man she loved. A slow, sweet melody, a pouring out of her heart, her very soul, for Ethan.

“The swing out back where we’d talk for hours

You’d smile, I’d blush, the world was ours

Back then I didn’t know all I had

I threw it all away when it all went black

Girlish dreams are glitter and polish

Up in smoke without a backwards glance

You gave me your heart then you let me go

I thought you didn’t care. I didn’t know

You set me free to give me a chance

I took my heart with me and never looked back

I hurt you then because I didn’t see

What it was you did for me

I was blind and foolish on my own

The lights were bright, it was all for show

Lonely nights, years on the road

It’s not enough anymore. I want to come home.

The world’s a big place with so much to see

I’ve learned a lot, I soared and was free

But the tie still remains, drawing me here