Alluring Turmoil (3 page)

Shaking my head to clear it, I look at her. I see the concern and confusion on her face. I’m finally able to comprehend that she’s talking to me, though I can’t yet understand what she’s saying. “What?”

“Lexi!
WHAT THE FUCK?
Why are you and Jude Delecroix…
‘Jude Fucking Delecroix’
, eye fucking and strangling each other from across the room? Do you know him? Lexi, tell me now!
DO. YOU. KNOW. HIM?
” Bradi is squeezing my hands now; I never even noticed she’d grabbed them.

I sigh and look into her eyes, before glancing back at him. He’s still staring and I can see the rage on his face and in his eyes. The rage directed at me. I tear my eyes away from Jude and look back at my confused best friend. Suddenly I feel defeated. “Yeah.” I sigh. “Yeah you could say that. There was a time when we knew each other very well. A time when we ripped each other’s clothes off at every available opportunity and fucked like rabbits. A time when the only way I was me, was with him. So yeah… you could say I know him. Or I guess I knew him.” My voice fades in and out as I talk. My voice is flat, monotone, as if I have no emotions.

Bradi’s mouth is opening and closing like a fish and her eyes are wide, like saucers in her head, as if she can’t form a coherent sentence. She’s looking from me to Jude and back, like she simply cannot believe it. Finally, she closes her eyes and takes a deep breath before looking into mine. “The fuck you say? You… you and Jude Delecroix?
THAT
Jude Delecroix?” She points at him. “The
ROCK STAR
! The one I talk about non stop? Are you
fucking serious
? How? Why? Oh my God… I don’t understand this.”

I sigh long and loud. My heart is still racing. I cannot believe he’s here. He’s
here
. In my shop and in
my
space. It’s hard for me to breathe and I feel as if I’m going to throw up, but I can see the confusion and a hint of betrayal on Bradi’s face. I know I owe her some sort of explanation. “We grew up together. You know he’s from here. We were inseparable. The three of us were inseparable, Erik, Jude, and me.” I swallow and close my eyes so I can continue. “You know the guy I told you about? The guy I said I lost myself in? The guy who broke me… well… there you go. That’s him. It was Jude.” I’m flapping my hand in his direction as I talk.

Looking at her and waiting for her reaction, time stands still. I don’t know what I’ll do if she walks away. With Jude here, with my emotions all over the place, with my heart in my throat and fear consuming me, I just wait… and wait.

She takes another deep breath and she looks at me, really looks at me. It feels like an hour has passed, but I guess it’s really only been a few seconds.

“Ok. Ok then. You and Jude Delecroix. Ok. It’s perfectly fine. But wait, no. No, you know what? It’s not ok! You and Jude Delecroix! You and Jude and you never told me?!?! Why didn’t you ever tell me Lexi? I’m your best friend! You should have told me!”

Suddenly we realize the coffee shop is no longer quiet. We both look around. Girls are screaming. Laptops are left on tables and couches as Jude is completely surrounded. Hands are all over him, people are in his face, thrusting things at him to sign. He meets my eyes one last time and then it’s as if a switch is flipped. He turns away from me, dismissing me, and turns towards his fans. He’s instantly smiling, signing things, shaking hands. He’s no longer the boy I once knew. The boy I can’t get out of my head. He’s in his element; he’s Jude Delecroix… the rock star.

I grab Bradi’s arm and pull her into the back, towards my office. I have to get away, away from Jude, away from his fans, away from the chaos in my beloved shop, I
need
to get away!

Jude

I look up from my fans. My fans, the people who love me. Guys who want to be me. Girls who want to be with me. I notice that Lexi is running from the room as if the hounds of hell are on her heels, dragging the blonde bombshell with her.

I smile. I take photos. I shake hands and sign whatever is thrust at me. I’m going through the motions. I can do this in my sleep, but my mind continues to focus on the redhead who just tipped my world on its axis, again, and then fled. Leaving me and racing from the room as if she can’t get away from me fast enough.

I don’t know why I’m surprised. It’s Lexi, and that’s what she does. It’s what she’s good at. At least with me.

I come to a conclusion as a busty brunette rubs intimately against me and slips me her phone number and address on a Java and Sweeties napkin. I give the brunette a sexy smirk, place the napkin in my pocket and use her hand to pat it. Then I gently squeeze her ass, as I look in the direction Lexi just fled.

Lexi can run, but she and I have unfinished business. And it’s past time she gets the fuck out of my head.

Lexi

I
fall against the desk in my office. Bradi is as breathless as me, and is still looking at me like she’s never seen me before. I cannot breathe. Like at all. I feel like there’s not enough oxygen in the room. Dammit, I will not let him do this to me. He’s just a guy. A guy I used to know better than I knew myself,
I thought,
but still he’s just a guy.

I try to take deep breaths and calm my racing heart. Finally, I am able to see straight and as I look into the shell shocked face of my best friend I realize he’s
not
just a guy. He’s Jude. He was
my
Jude. My life. He’s back. And I’m totally and completely fucked.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you, Bradi. I don’t talk about him. I can’t talk about him. I just… can’t.”

I’m biting down so hard on my lip, I taste blood.

As Bradi looks at me, she takes in my wild, glazed eyes, my erratic breaths, my lip biting, and her face softens. She walks over and sits next to me on the desk, taking my shaking hands in hers. “Lexi, it’s ok. I don’t really understand what just happened, but I get it. I’m not mad. Honestly I am shocked though. You’re my best friend. We’ve been best friends for seven years, since sophomore year of college, and you’re always so put together. The Lexi I know hates rock stars, so the thought that you’ve gotten jiggy with one of the hottest rock stars on the planet is a lot to take in, ok? But it’s cool. I love you.” She sighs softly. “Are you going to be ok? What are you going to do?”

Breathing in through my nose and out through my mouth, I look at her and shrug. “I have no idea. What
can
I do? He’s
here
. I don’t know why he’s here or why he came into my shop, but he’s here! Fuck me.”

There’s a knock at the office door and it slowly opens. Erik pops his head in. “Hey love, you ok?” He looks at me with concern. “That was… well shit, that was intense. I’m sorry it happened. I shut the place down for the night.”

Nodding my head yes, I drop Bradi’s hand and look at Erik. “Yeah… is he gone?”

“Yeah babe, he’s gone and his fan club along with him. Now tell me the truth. Are you ok? Remember I know you, so I know when you lie. And I know that was hard for you.” He throws his arm around me and I lay my head on his muscled chest and squeeze his jean-clad thigh.

“I dunno, E. I really don’t know. I wasn’t expecting that, although I should have. I mean I knew he was in town with the concert and all, but why did he come here? Why
would
he come here? Did you
know
he was coming here?”

Erik hugs me tight and I wrap my arms around him. He’s so built, my hands can barely reach around his stomach. He’s warm and comfortable and he feels like home. I love him so much.

“Well, I’ll give you three guesses why he came here. Did you really think he wouldn’t? I mean, Lexi look at you. Did you honestly think you two could avoid each other forever? After everything…” He looks at me closely, taking me in. “I’m sure he wanted to see you. He wants to know if you’ve changed. And I know he wanted to see if you were still the sexy thing he used to know. But to answer your other question, I didn’t know he was coming here. I imagined he might show up eventually, but I didn’t know. And if I did know, you know I’d tell you. I’ll always tell you.”

I know I’m attractive. I’m not stupid or naïve. I’m petite, only 5’3 with long bright auburn hair, that no matter what I do, always has waves. My eyes are a bright golden brown. They’ve been called bedroom eyes by more than one person. In fact, they’re almost the same color as my hair. My face is clear of blemishes and I have a few freckles across the bridge of my nose. I have long, thick eyelashes and full, naturally red lips. I’m not skinny, but I’m not fat. I have curves. I have large breasts for someone so short and my waist curves in while my hips and butt flare out. My legs are naturally toned. I get attention from males. So yes, I am attractive.

“Well, he got a look. Now hopefully he’ll just leave me alone. It was obvious he still hates me, so maybe we won’t run into each other again, right?” I mutter into Erik’s chest as I rub my face back and forth just breathing in his smell. It’s comforting to me. A mix of coffee and musk, that’s naturally Erik.

Erik pets my head, soothing me, stroking the waves off of my face. “Yeah, sure love, whatever you say. But I wouldn’t hold my breath.”

I sigh again as I look up into his smoky blue eyes, hugging him tighter. “I know… I know… his eyes sent a pretty clear message. I just hope I have a couple of days to regroup.”

Erik kisses the top of my head and jumps off of the desk, pulling me down with him. “Whatever happens, I’m here. I’ve always got your back, love. You know that.”

Bradi hops across the room, after sending a text on her phone, enveloping us both in a hug and says, “I’ve got your back too, babe. But for now, all this crazy anxiety and sexual tension has me needing a freaking drink. Both of you get your sexy asses in gear! We’re going to Bruno’s. Micah already has us a table!”

I smile and hug both of my best friends; I really do have the best damn friends in the world. As we make our way to Erik’s car, I try to push the tension at the back of my neck down. I need this and I’m determined to have some fun tonight. All the craziness can wait until tomorrow. I’ll try to figure it out then.

Bruno’s is packed. We finally find a place to park behind the bar and all get out, focused on putting the insanity of the past two hours behind us.

Once we clear the door, we see Micah waving to us from across the bar. He’s secured us a table at the edge of the dance floor, near the pool tables, and there’s already a pitcher of beer waiting on us. We reach him through the smoke and lights and he kisses Bradi lightly, fist bumps Erik, and pulls me in for a hug. “So, exciting night, huh?”

I laugh, I just can’t help it. It’s either that or cry and I promised myself a long time ago, no more tears over Jude Delecroix. “Yeah, you could say that. You know, one of those nights that will go down in history, but for now, let’s drink… and dance.”

I grab my beer and down the entire glass. I’m not a big drinker, in fact, I rarely get drunk, but tonight? Tonight is one of those nights where I know I’m going to get shitfaced.

After finishing my beer, I grab Bradi and pull her towards the dance floor. Usher is on, the lights are low, and I
need
to just dance and forget about the rest of the world.

We drink and dance, and drink some more. I lose track of the number of pitchers we’ve gone through. After about two hours, I’m pretty buzzed and feeling great. Erik and Micah have joined us on the dance floor. We’re all having a good time.

Micah and Bradi are grinding on the dance floor, practically having sex. Erik has found a sexy guy to dance with and they’re enthusiastically grinding each other into oblivion. I’ve switched partners on the dance floor a few times, but I’ve been dancing with the same guy for about half an hour or so.

I love dancing. I always have. And I can move. I never have a shortage of willing partners on the dance floor, but that’s where I generally leave them, on the dance floor! Tonight I’ve let things go a little further than normal. With my emotions running rampant, the alcohol, and the anxiety flowing through my body, I’ve let my dance partner get a little handsy.