Alyssa's Desire (6 page)

   
Although Alyssa lived about twelve blocks away, she decided to walk home rather than taking a cab or the subway. She figured it would do her good even though she had already run for nine miles on the treadmill. She enjoyed being outside and the walk was a good opportunity to just think about what had happened that day. Needless to say Alyssa had a lot to process and she had a lot of difficult feelings to work through.

    When Alyssa got
back to her apartment building, she noticed that a blue car with black, tinted windows was parked outside. For some reason the car gave her a bad feeling. The hairs on her arms and the nape of her neck stood up and she felt a strong sense of fear and anxiety although she had no idea why she was reacting this way. Alyssa couldn't remember ever seeing the car before. Why did she have such a strong reaction? Nonetheless, Alyssa stood outside the apartment for a few minutes, debating whether or not to go in. Finally she convinced herself that she was being silly and that the bad feelings were just a result of her generally crappy day and the guilt she felt over hanging up on her mom.

   
Feeling confident that the strange feeling was all in her head, Alyssa made her way to her apartment. She put her key in the lock but the door opened before she turned the key. It was like the door wasn't shut at all. Alyssa stayed very still for a minute. She listened at the door and she did not hear anything inside. Could she have left without pulling the door shut all the way? She supposed that it was possible, considering how upset she was when she left. She looked around at the door. There were no marks or damage, nothing that would indicate a break in. Alyssa decided that she must have thought the door was closed when it really wasn't. Alyssa pushed open the door and peeked inside. Nothing was out of place, the lights were all out and Alyssa didn't hear anyone inside. She breathed a heavy sigh of relief and she shut the door and locked the deadbolt and the chain.
What a day!
She went right to the cabinet and grabbed a bottle of wine and a glass. She was already slightly buzzed from the Mai Tai's she had at June's place. This wine should finish the job. She drank the whole bottle and ended up falling asleep in her chair.

     The next morning, Alyssa was really feeling the effects of her overzealous alcohol consumption. Her mouth was dry and her head was pounding. Her stomach turned and her body ached. She didn't think that she had been that drunk, but the hangover was undeniable.
Great, Mom's a junkie and I'm a drunk.
She cursed herself silently. Feeling filthy and outwardly frustrated, Alyssa went to take a shower. When she walked through her bedroom, she noticed that an old photo album was on her bed and open to a page of pictures of her mother. She couldn't remember getting out the photos. Had she really gotten that drunk? Alyssa walked over to close the album when she saw a note lying on the open page. She picked it up and read it to herself.

   
The five grand you paid covered your mom's old debt but she owes us for the products she picked up recently. Heard she was incarcerated. You can either make things good or she might not make it out of there alive. We'll be in touch.

    Alyssa's hands shook with fear as she read the note. Sweat beaded on her forehead and her stomach
churned. There had been someone in her apartment! Alyssa was so angry with herself for ignoring the open door. Now she was faced with the realization that an intruder had been in her house and could have still been there when she got home! She figured it had to have been Trevor Barnes because he was the man she paid the other money to, but how did he know where she lived? Was she even alone now? What if she was being watched? Terrified and shaking, Alyssa grabbed her purse and she ran out the front door and down the road to a public shopping area. She felt safer being out in public. She got out her cell phone and dialed 911. She told the dispatcher that someone had broken into her apartment and that she would meet the police nearby.

    About an hour and a half
later a police car finally arrived. Alyssa was annoyed that they only sent one car and even more irritated that it had taken them so long to get to her. If she had called from home, and someone was still there, she probably would have been dead by now. She told the police the entire story. She told them about her mother and the money and the drugs. Then she showed them to her apartment and she gave them the note. She was expecting the police to do something about it, to protect her somehow. Instead they arrested her! Alyssa was charged with purchasing an illegal narcotic because she had given the money to Trevor Barnes. Even though it was her mother's debt and her mother's drugs, the police said that by paying the debt Alyssa had in fact purchased the drugs. So now in a strange twist of fate, Alyssa found herself in a holding cell, facing nearly the same charges as her mother, minus of course the solicitation charges.

    Alyssa sat on the cold, hard bench staring at the concrete walls of the holding cell. Three other women were in the same cage that held Alyssa. She didn't look at them or speak to them. She didn't know why they were there and she didn't want to find out. She sat alone in the corner, with her legs crossed beneath her. She closed her eyes and rested her head against the hard wall behind her. Before long an officer came to escort Alyssa to make her one phone call. Alyssa figured this was karma for hanging up on her mom earlier that day. Alyssa made her way to the payphone and the guard handed her two quarters. She picked up the receiver and just stared at it for a second. She didn't even know who she would call. The only family she had was her mother and she didn't have any close friends. She had friends that she saw on occasion, but no one that she could call in this situation. Hesitantly, she decided to call June.
She knew that she couldn't ask June to post bail for her but maybe June could at least tell work that she wasn't going to be in. She figured that she would be fired anyway, but at least she could give them some form of notice. Sadly she realized that she would probably never see Jack Coleman again.
It's for the best,
she told herself. Then she left a message on June's answering machine, telling her what happened and where she was. Then she asked June to please tell work that she wouldn't be back and then Alyssa just hung up. Hanging up that phone felt like hanging up on her life. In less than a minute, one phone call probably meant the loss of her job, her apartment and the man she so desperately loved.

Chapter Five: New Hope

    After Alyssa hung up the phone, she went through the booking procedures in silence. She cooperated fully with the officers but she didn't say a word unless she had to. She just stared off into space, trying desperately to wake up from this newfound nightmare. Alyssa's silence and disconnected demeanor weren't meant as an act of defiance, nor was she keeping quiet to protect her rights. She was just trying to accept the situation and to process what had happened. Although she had never intended to do so, she had committed a crime. By paying her mother's debt she had in a roundabout sort of way, purchased street narcotics. She had not gone to the police when it happened and therefore she was responsible. On the other hand she was bitter and angry about being arrested. She had called the police because someone had broken into her home and threatened her and she was asking for help. Instead she was treated like a criminal, arrested and thrown in a cage like an animal. No wonder so many people had a deep mistrust of the police and of the government.

     Alyssa kept thinking about the karma of her actions. When her mother had called her from jail that morning, she had turned her back on her. How ironic it was that Alyssa now found herself in the exact same situation as her mom. Fate it seems has a sense of humor. Alyssa knew she had lost everything. Her mother would probably never speak to her again. Once June told her employer what
happened, Alyssa would most likely be fired. What law firm after all would keep on a low level paralegal after a criminal arrest? Certainly a big name establishment like Coleman, Patters and Schleicher would frown on such a thing. Losing her job would have a ripple effect on her already shitty life. She would lose Jack, not that she ever had a chance with him anyway. With no money coming in she would not be able to pay her debts. She would lose everything she owned and no doubt criminals would come after her for the rest of the money her mom owed as well. So best case scenario, she ends up with an extended jail sentence followed by probable homelessness and ruined credit and worst case, she ends up dead in a ditch somewhere. She was screwed, plain and simple.

     At least for the time being she was safe. After booking, they had taken her to a cell where she was all alone. Although she despised the bars that contained her, they did serve the purpose of protecting her from
the other inmates. For now, she had no bunkmate to potentially hurt her and the other women were kept at bay by the sheer will of iron and steel. Despite feeling some comfort in her solitude, Alyssa had fallen into a deep depression. She refused to eat or to talk. She just sat in her cell with her eyes closed until she fell asleep.

 
"Snyder?" An officer's booming voice cut through Alyssa's dream state, rudely rousing her from the only peace she had.

     "Alyssa Snyder!"  The voice commanded and the bars rattled. Alyssa opened her eyes to see a rather large prison guard who was banging on the bars to her cell with a night stick. His massive size and the irritated tone of his voice nearly caused Alyssa to pee in her pants.

    "Yes?" Alyssa asked meekly. She hoped against hope that she hadn't inadvertently violated some rule or policy that she was unaware of. The last thing she needed was to get into any more trouble.

    "Let's go, your lawyer is here to see you," he said as he unlocked the cell and opened the door.

   "My lawyer?" Alyssa questioned and then she realized that they must have assigned her a public defender. She didn't figure that it would do her much good, but she knew better than to argue. She was escorted to a small, isolated room that was meant for prisoners to speak privately with their attorneys. Alyssa sat there expecting to see some loser guy like the idiot lawyer she had worked for right out of college. Her jaw dropped when Jack Coleman walked into the room.

    "Mr. Coleman?" Alyssa asked in a mixture of shock and embarrassment.

    "Don't worry Alyssa, I'm handling your case 'pro bono.' June told me what happened with your mom. These charges are bogus. I can get them dropped easily if you give an official statement about what happened. I'm not going to lie to you though; the police will use the information you give them to go after Trevor Barnes and your mother as well. If you take this option the charges against you are dropped in full. This mess goes away and you can come back to work. No one will know. If you don't want to do it this way, I will still represent you and we will probably win in court, but you will lose your job. It's company policy. The choice is yours," Jack said with seriousness to his voice that Alyssa had never heard before.

   
"I will make the statement," Alyssa said without emotion. She just looked down at her lap as she spoke. She was so relieved that Jack was helping her but she was so devastated that he knew about all of this.

    "You do understand that you will possibly be incriminating your mother?" Jack asked.

    "I understand but I have to make my peace with it. I tried to help her but I ended up in major debt, I was threatened by drug dealers and then I was arrested. I hate to say it, but I'm done with her until she decides to get some help for her addiction. I am worried about making a statement against Trevor Barnes though. If he gets arrested and he knows that I had a hand in it, he will come after me. I'm pretty sure he was the one who broke into my apartment and left me that nice little note."

    "Okay, we'll figure it out. I promise I won't let anything happen to you, Alyssa."

    Jack reached out and gently touched Alyssa's hand as he spoke and then got up from the table and motioned to the guard through the window. He turned and winked at Alyssa and he gave her a reassuring smile. The guard opened the door to the conference room.

    "My client will be accepting the offer with a few minor amendments regarding her safety including a protection detail and anonymity in her statement. I would like to propose the terms to the prosecutor immediately. Can you please escort my client back to her cell until all the arrangements have been made?"

    "Yes, sir," the guard answered complacently and then he took Alyssa back to the cell and asked her to wait there. Alyssa just nodded and she made her way to the cot where she had previously slept. She was just starting to drift off again when the guard returned and informed her that her lawyer had made the necessary arrangements for the charges to be dropped. He told Alyssa that she would be taken to an interrogation room where her attorney was waiting. She was to give her statement and then she would be released with no pending charges.

   
Alyssa was brought into the interrogation room wearing handcuffs. She was honestly more afraid of being escorted into this little room with a camera and a microphone than she was of being put in a jail cell. Jack was sitting at the table when she entered the room. She must have looked frightened because he made it a point to tell her several times that everything would be okay. Jack promised that Alyssa's statement would be kept confidential. As an added bonus, a protection detail would be in place outside Alyssa's apartment until Trevor Barnes was behind bars. Jack also assured Alyssa that her mother would not know anything of her testimony. 

   
Alyssa sat down across from Jack. He positioned the microphone in front of her. He then opened his briefcase and he pulled out a stack of very official looking papers. He explained each document carefully. They indicated that Alyssa, who was named "anonymous defendant," would be absolved of all charges in exchange for an official statement pertaining to the criminal activity she witnessed. The papers also agreed to the protection detail and a confidentiality agreement. Alyssa signed each paper with great hesitation as she was worried about incriminating her mother and a man who was potentially dangerous. But Alyssa didn't want to lose her job or her apartment nor did she want to do time for unwillingly committing a crime, and so she signed everything and prepared to give her statement. Jack assured her that she had made the right decision and that no one at work would know anything about this. Then a detective entered the room and said he was going to record Alyssa's statement but that her face and voice would be disguised if it was used in court.

    The detective turned on the video camera and checked the audio feed. He then reminded Alyssa that she should phrase things in a way that did not give away her identity. For example she should
address her mother by her name to avoid giving away their relationship. Alyssa nodded in understanding and then she told Jack and the detective that she did not know how she could phrase what had happened without giving away her identity because she was the only one in the room with her mother and Trevor Barnes at the time. The detective advised her to say something like, "I have knowledge that an associate of mine was engaged in said activity."

    Alyssa raised her eyebrows skeptically and she looked at Jack. He gave her a crooked smile and he nodded his head. It was clear that he approved under the circumstances but that he had his doubts as to how effective her statement would be.

    "What good would that do? Wouldn't my testimony be thrown out as hearsay?" Alyssa voiced her skepticism but then she immediately regretted speaking up. After she had spoken the thought occurred to her that she might be pointing out the one thing that could spoil her deal. She clamped her mouth shut and looked again to Jack.

   
"Quite possibly, yes. The truth is that I would have evidence of this sort thrown out immediately. However it is unlikely that either your mother or Mr. Barnes will recognize this. Chances are they will simply hear that someone gave a statement about their criminal activity and then they will take whatever deal is offered to them at the time," Jack responded.

  
"Seems like a shady practice to me," Alyssa replied.

    "Sometimes the law is shady, Alyssa. I hate to say it but there is a lot of gray area when it comes to the judicial system," Jack motioned for Alyssa to begin the recording as he said this. As much as she adored him, Alyssa regarded jack coolly but she told the detective
that she was ready. He turned on the camera and Alyssa began to tell the story.

    
"I have knowledge that an associate of mine was involved in the criminal distribution of heroin. I know through my contact with certain people, that Trevor Barnes gave Valerie Snyder a fair amount of heroin and that Valerie was supposed to then sell it for him. Valerie is a drug addict and she ended up using the heroin rather than selling it. Trevor Barnes then demanded that Valerie Snyder pay him $5,000 for the drugs that she used. Valerie Snyder supposedly borrowed this money from her daughter and paid Trevor Barnes. Later Trevor once again supplied Valerie Barnes with drugs with the understanding that Valerie would sell it and once more she used it instead. To the best of my knowledge Valerie did not pay Mr. Barnes for the second round of heroin. Valerie Snyder was then arrested and Trevor Barnes was threatening to kill her and her family for nonpayment. That's really all that I know, except that the first time around Trevor Barnes beat up Valerie Snyder pretty good and did some damage to her apartment."

    After Alyssa was done giving her statement, the detective and Jack spoke outside for a few minutes. Alyssa was very nervous as she watched them talking through the small window on the door.
Was her statement inadequate? Had the detective decided to keep the charges against her? What about the DA, had he rescinded the offer?
Thoughts kept racing through her mind, and none of them were good. Jack and the detective were only outside the door for a few moments, but it seemed like an eternity to Alyssa who felt like her fate was being decided by these two men. A minute later Jack returned and he told Alyssa that the detective went to submit the papers and set things in motion for her release. He told her that they would have to stay in the room for about an hour while the paper work was processed and then he would drive her home. Alyssa was relieved but also so ashamed to let Jack see her like this. She hung her head and then wiped away a few stray tears before offering Jack a thank you for everything he had done to help her.

    "Hey, it's okay. I can't tell you how many times I have represented someone who wasn't a criminal but who got involved with something due to a friend or a family
member. Shit happens. What happened here is not your fault. You were trying to help your mother, to save her life. You and I both know that guys like Trevor Barnes only care about making money and pushing their product. He wouldn't have thought twice about killing her and you did what you did to prevent that. I am sorry that your mother has such a dependence problem that she got herself in the same situation twice, and I am sorry that she put such an emotional and a financial burden on you in the process. I can see that you feel embarrassed about being in this situation, but I want you to know that I understand that none of it was your fault and I do not think any less of you because of it," Jack said with true sincerity in his voice.

   "Thank you. I...I just," Alyssa's voice trailed off as she couldn't think of what to say. The reality of the situation was finally hitting her and she was fighting to keep in all of the emotions that she felt. Jack handed her a tissue and Alyssa started to cry softly.

    "You know, I think what you did was commendable. If anything your actions show that you are a strong and caring woman, someone who would put others first. I think these are fantastic qualities and you should be proud of yourself. These are the kind of qualities that I am glad I found in an employee. I still want you to come and work on my team eventually. You have been doing an excellent job; you just need to spend a little time working where you are at before I can bring you on board full time. If I invite you too soon, people might think I like you or something," Jack said jokingly but Alyssa's heart skipped a beat when he said that. She offered a nervous laugh as a response.
God I wish he liked me,
she thought as she wiped away her tears.