Ambrosia Shore (31 page)

Ash wiped the sweat from his brow and moved on from pushups to work on his abs. He had to keep moving, drown out the maddening quiet of his cell. It had been four days since Rayne left, and as much as Ash hated to admit it to himself, he really missed the guy. Even when they were fighting, it was nice to at least know that somebody was there.

Ash heard everything that took place the day of the hearing, thanks to one of the Court guard’s and his radio. He wasn’t surprised by the way things turned out in the end, and he could truly say that he was happy for Rayne, happy to see him set free. Rayne didn’t deserve to be here like Ash did.

The big wooden door at the far side of the room twisted open, causing Ash to pause and sit upright in his place on the floor. As usual, a Court guard entered the room, but he wasn’t alone. When Ash saw the man standing behind the guard, he jumped to his feet with wide eyes. Hamlin Fairbanks? What was he doing here? Did the Council finally send him down to take Rayne’s place?

Ash watched with concern as the guard ushered Hamlin inside, but they did not go to one of the adjoining cells. Instead, they walked directly toward him.

The guard unlocked the door of metal bars in front of him and said, “You have a visitor.”

Hamlin passed in front of the guard into Ash’s cell then gave the guard a nod. “I’d like to speak to him alone for a few minutes,” he said. The guard nodded back, locking the door behind him and leaving the room.

Ash stood wordlessly, a string of guilt edging through him. Just looking at the man’s face brought everything back to the surface. It was Ash’s fault they were here.

Hamlin spoke first. “I hope you don’t mind the intrusion,” he said. “I just had a few things I wanted to say.”

Ash shook his head. “It’s fine. Whatever you have to say, I’m sure I deserve it.”

“I’m not here to reprimand you,” Hamlin said.

Ash’s brow creased. “Well, you should. I basically ruined your life. Rayne never would have been on that stand if it wasn’t for me. From what I’ve heard, they’re sending you to prison for twenty years.”

Hamlin concealed a smile. “Well, sometimes things aren’t exactly what they seem. I’m going to be fine, and so is Rayne.”

Ash stared at the floor. “I heard everything that happened at Rayne’s hearing. I honestly didn’t think you would stand up for him like that. I told Rayne he was an idiot for wanting to protect you, but… I was wrong.”

“Rayne is like a son to me,” Hamlin said. “I would have done anything to defend him.”

Ash shook his head, exhaling a quiet scoff. “Sorry, I guess that concept is hard for me to understand.”

 “That’s partly why I’m here,” Hamlin said. He paused and took a step closer. “I may not be your father, but I want you to know that I always wished you were my son. I can’t tell you how many times I wanted to tell you I was proud of you. And despite what you might think, I still am.”

Ash’s body went still. For the briefest moment, the constant ache in his chest seemed to lift away. Hamlin gazed back at him with such intensity, Ash almost believed it was true. He wanted to believe it was true.

“You are strong, Ash. Your father let his bitterness and fear control him, but that doesn’t have to be you. For years he pushed that fear onto you, but you never gave up. Don’t give up now. Don’t follow your father’s steps down that dark path. You have to understand that your father is not happy. He is miserable, and the more he feeds his rage the more miserable he becomes. You don’t have to follow him there.”

Ash felt the ache in his chest return. “But I’ve already hurt so many people. I’ve made too many mistakes.”

Hamlin looked Ash directly in the eye. “Believe me, you are not the only one. And I can tell you from experience that it’s never too late to change. I see so much good in you, so much potential. I see your mother in you, her headstrong resilience, her vibrancy for life. She cared about people, and even if you can’t see it, I see that in you.”

Hamlin moved forward and placed his hand on Ash’s shoulder. “Ash,” he said, “the reason why you feel the hurt so much…is because you care so deeply. That is not your weakness; it is your greatest strength. And it is the reason why I know there’s still hope for you.”

Ash’s jaw began to tremble. “I’m sorry that I hurt the people you care about. You didn’t deserve that. My father was wrong and I should have tried harder to stop him. I never wanted to hurt anyone; you have to believe me.”

“I believe you,” Hamlin said. “I want you to know, right now, that I forgive you. And I am proud of you.”

Ash couldn’t speak. The swelling in his chest became so great it overcame him. For the first time in his life, he actually thought he understood what it meant to feel a father’s love.

Hamlin smiled. “I also trust you. Which is why I’m about to share something with you that nobody else can know.” He paused. “Ash, the Council isn’t sending me to prison as they would have the public believe. They’re sending me on a top-secret assignment. I’m telling you this because I want you to understand that, like me, you can have a second chance. If you help the Council, they will help you back.”

Ash understood what Hamlin was saying. He understood what he had to do. Ash nodded, gazing back at Hamlin with both gratitude and determination. “I want to help them find my father,” he said. “We have to stop him before he hurts anyone else.”

Finals were officially over and the last week of senior activities were well underway. We had the senior awards night, a yearbook signing party, the senior breakfast, a huge group photo with everyone in our graduating class, and an all day trip to Disneyland. The students were buzzing with exhilaration, celebrating the final close of this chapter in our lives.

 After graduation practice Friday afternoon, Heather found me in line waiting to pick up my cap and gown.

“Four more days and we’re outta here,” she said happily. “Can you believe it?”

“I know,” I said. “It’s crazy. I can’t believe we’re done.” My tone was upbeat, but all I could think about was how everything was ending too fast. I had no idea when Orion was going to come back for me, or how much notice he would give me when it was time to leave. For all I knew he could show up tomorrow and say we were leaving the minute graduation was over.

“Are you coming out with us tonight?” Heather asked. “Rayne’s invited too.”

I wanted to go, but I had already spent a ton of time with my friends that week and barely any time with my mom.

I shook my head. “No, my mom has the night off, so I think we’re planning to do something.”

Heather pretended to pout. “Are you sure? This is our last weekend as seniors…”

The guy in front of me walked away from the table, and I moved to the front of the line. “Sorry,” I said, “but maybe I can catch up with you guys tomorrow.”

“You better,” she joked. “And don’t forget Nick’s barbeque on Sunday.”

I smiled. “Of course. I wouldn’t miss it.”

When I pulled my car into our driveway at home, a small knot formed in my throat. There was an extra black SUV parked outside next to the curb. I was certain there were only two when I left in the morning, and now there were three. It had to be Orion.

I pulled the straps of my bag over my shoulder, clutching it against my side, and walked with purpose to the front of the house. But when I opened the door and stepped inside, my feet stopped in place. It wasn’t Orion in my living room next to my mom; it was my father.

The breath caught in my throat. How was he here? Did the Council let him go? A million mixed emotions shot to the surface, everything about my father that I had pushed back inside while he was away. I stuttered as I tried to speak. “Oh…uh, Lin, you’re—”

Before I could finish, my mom sprang from the couch beside him. “Sweetie, isn’t it wonderful?” she said. “He came back, just like I told you he would.” Her face beamed brighter than the sun.

It was strange; something inside me wanted to beam too, but the feelings were tangled inside me. I nodded and drifted forward on unsteady feet. “Uh, yeah, that’s…great.” I stared at my father with searching eyes. “Are you planning to…stay…long?” I struggled through the words. Was he actually here, or had he just been given a final chance to say goodbye before they locked him away?

All this time while he was gone I was trying not to think about it, not wanting to accept the fact that I had ruined my one chance to get to know him because I was too scared. He was right here in front of me, and I had pushed him away. When Rayne told me what my father had done for him at the hearing, I was sure I had lost that chance for good.

My father stood from the couch. “We need to talk,” he said. “All three of us.” He glanced at my mom then looked back at me carefully. “But first, Sadie, I need to ask you an important question. Orion mentioned to me your
plans
after graduation.” His voice hung heavy on the word plans. I knew he was referring to my plans to move to Ambrosia. My father spoke slowly, emphasizing every word as he continued. “Before we talk about anything else, I need to know that you still want to move forward with your decision. If you have
any
doubts at all, now would be the time to tell me.”

I didn’t have to think about it. I looked back at him firmly. “I’m sure about my decision.”

He searched my eyes carefully, waiting, giving me one last chance to change my mind.

“I’m sure,” I said again. “I know where I’m supposed to be.”

A quiet smile moved through his face. “I’m happy to hear it…because I have wonderful news.” He turned to face my mother who was watching us closely, reaching to take her hand. “Leena,” he said, “I cannot stay here with you, but how would you feel about coming back with me?”

A sudden spring of hope moved through me. Was there a chance I wouldn’t lose her after all?

A painful smile etched through my mom’s face, like she wanted to cheer and cry at the same time. “They…would let me come with you?”

His eyes filled with a sense of hope and longing at her reply. He drew toward her, reached for her hand. “Yes,” he breathed. As if the word could not contain a lifetime of want, he had to say it again. “Yes…” They gazed into each other’s eyes for a long moment, living in the reality that was once just a dream.

He moved back and continued to watch her face carefully as he explained. “It’s important that you understand something. There is a sacrifice that would have to be made. If you choose to come with me, you would have to leave this life behind—your home, many of your belongings, your job at the hospital, your friends, everything. You wouldn’t be allowed to make contact with anyone here again.” His expression went somber. “You would never be allowed to return.”

My mom’s face creased with concern. “Leave everything? But, what about Sadie?”

“She would come with us,” my father said. “In fact, she’s already decided she wants to come.”

My mom’s neck jerked in my direction, looking for confirmation, a wave of hurt in her eyes when she realized I had hidden the truth from her.

I nodded hesitantly. “It’s true. I talked to Orion about it before he left.”

Mom went quiet. Her head hung down as she pondered.

I watched with expectant eyes, waiting as she took several moments to consider. Then, she finally lifted her gaze. She looked at me with a warm smile, turned to my father, and said, “How much time do I have to pack?”

A jubilant squeal escaped my lips. My mom was coming with me. It felt like a bag of rocks the size of my car had been released off my shoulders. I reached out to hug her.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” I gushed. “It just felt too hard to say goodbye.”

Mom hugged me back. “Well, now you don’t have to.”

A second later I was watching my parents embrace each other for a kiss, and this time, it didn’t make me cringe. I was happy they were finally going to be together. My mom had waited so long for this moment.

“Are you allowed to tell me where we’re going?” my mom asked him.

“Not yet,” he said, “but I promise you won’t be disappointed.”

I snickered. “That’s the understatement of the year…”

Mom’s jaw dropped open to gape at me. “You’ve already been there?”

I shrugged guiltily and took in a long breath. “Well…yeah, sort of. But it wasn’t planned. Rayne took me there after I was shot. He had to, to save me.”

Mom folded her arms. “So basically, everyone knows where we’re going except for me.” Her body was stern, but I could tell from her eyes that she wasn’t mad.

“Well, Rayne did go to jail for taking me there,” I said. “So you should probably be thankful they’re letting you in at all.”

Mom smiled. “I guess you have a point, and since you two both say I’m going to love it, then I suppose I’m willing to take my chances.”

“You will,” I insisted. “Believe me; it’s amazing.”

My father took a few minutes to explain our situation more fully. All of Orion’s agents were being called back through the border except for Agent Duke, who would escort us to the border the following week. We would have two days after graduation to finish packing and make last minute arrangements, and then they would take us to a meeting with three members of the Council where they would give us one last chance to change our minds before it was goodbye forever.

My mom shook her head in bewilderment. “That’s so soon. There’s so much I need to do. She turned and headed quickly out of the room, her tone energized as she said, “I need to call the hospital right away.”

My father and I were alone in the room. I stared down, studying the floor awkwardly. My mom was definitely our buffer.

My father cleared his throat. “Uh, just so you know, they’ve agreed to remove your voice tracker as soon as we cross the border.”

I shot my eyes up at him for only a second, forcing a smile. “That’s… good news.” Truthfully, it was a major relief to know that the tracker would be gone soon, but my nerves were too tense, being alone with my father, to express it.

I looked at the floor again, then the wall, basically anything besides my father’s face. As the silence grew, I focused on twisting my ankle and foot aimlessly over the carpet. I thought about simply walking away to free myself from the discomfort, but I continued to wait, secretly wishing he would find a reason to talk to me.

Finally, I was about to give up and go back to my room. I shrugged abruptly and turned to leave. “I think I have some packing to do,” I mumbled.

“Um, Sadie…” my father called after me.

I stopped. “Yeah?”

He paused again, hesitating. “If you have a minute, I was thinking… well, I brought something with me that I’d like for you to have.”

I nodded back at him, then watched as he moved rigidly across the room and reached for a black leather bag sitting on the floor near the couch. After digging through the contents a moment he started to pull out what looked like a stack of papers of some kind. Just as he had the papers halfway out of the bag, his hand froze. He stared down at them carefully, meaningfully, and then slid them back into the bag.

A second later, instead of the papers, he turned back to me with a book in his hand.

I stepped forward with interest when I saw it. “My diary,” I said with surprise.” I reached out and accepted it from his outstretched hand.

“Rayne wasn’t able to go back for it,” my father explained.

The corners of my mouth lifted. “Thanks. It would have been really embarrassing if some guard at the Court had found this.”

“Don’t thank
me
,” my father said. “Thank Ash Hastings. He’s the one who told me about it.”

My face contorted. “
Ash
? Why would
he
help Rayne? Or anyone for that matter?”

“Well, this may be hard to believe, but it would seem he’s had a change of heart recently.”

I folded my arms to my chest. “I highly doubt that.”

My father paused, his expression turning somber, as if my comment had somehow triggered something that upset him. “Can we talk for a minute?” he asked. “I feel there’s something I need to say.” He gestured toward the couch.

I nodded quietly and took a seat, knowing there were things I wanted to say as well. My father sat next to me, close enough to talk, but without intruding on my personal space.

“Before you say anything,” I began, “I wanted to thank you for what you did for Rayne at the hearing. You really came through for him.”

My father smiled sadly. “Well, it was the right thing to do. Rayne didn’t deserve to be punished.”

My face wrinkled. “I thought they were sending you to prison. I don’t understand how you’re here right now.”

My father shook his head. “Apparently, I don’t know the Council as well as I thought I did. They told me they would have gone easy on Rayne if the situation hadn’t been leaked to the press. Basically, the common citizens of Ambrosia are going to believe that I’m in prison for the next twenty years, while the Council sends me off to a top-secret project out in the middle of nowhere. Only you and your mother, and a short list of top-clearance personnel, will know the truth of my whereabouts.”

“Does that mean the Council is expecting me to go out there with you?” I asked.

My father looked perplexed. “I’m not certain, but I think that was the assumption. Did you have something else in mind?”

I started fidgeting with the bottom of my shirt. “Well…of course it would be nice to be close to Mom, but I was thinking I might like to stay near the city. Rayne said I might be able to go to college, and he’s planning to stay there to start working as a real Keeper…” My voice trailed off, embarrassed.

My father smiled knowingly. “Ah, I should have realized. You would like to stay near Rayne.”

My cheeks filled with heat. “That’s definitely part of it,” I said, “but there’s something else too. Rayne already told me they would say no, but I was kind of hoping the Council would consider letting me into the Ambassadors Academy.” I glanced up at my father with timid eyes. “Do you think the Council would even consider it, you know, since I wasn’t born on Ambrosia?”

After a moment of surprise, my father raised his hand to his chin thoughtfully. “You know,” he began, “a week ago I would have agreed with Rayne completely, but now I’m not so sure. My first instinct is to tell you they would say no, just like Rayne, but the Council has surprised me quite a bit lately. I suppose, if it’s really what you want to do, it certainly couldn’t hurt to ask.”