American Monsters (9 page)

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Authors: Sezin Koehler

BOOK: American Monsters
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9:40 P.M.

The camera drifts from Habanilla’s window and floats again, on the smog, towards The Motel Chain Mansion. The line of cars has been moving faster. It’s not so far now. The camera passes over an Alfa Romeo holding three women. The camera does a double take and then films through the windshield.

Console, Trip, and Skreem are in the car.

Trip:

I feel really weird, guys. Like my body wants to crawl out of my skin or something. So uncomfortable.

Console:

Party withdrawals? How long has it been for you? A week?

Trip:

Shut up. I’m serious.

Console:

So am I.

Console, deciding to overlook her recent crowd phobia to venture out for the night, begins drumming her fingers on the steering wheel. They are approaching the Hollywood Hills, and the line of cars begins moving slightly upwards. In the distance, they can see The Motel Chain Mansion’s gate, an imposing piece of wrought iron. The cars stop and go as attendants at the gate check tickets. Parking is $10.00. As they get closer to the gate, Console sees a glowing figure by the side of the road. It looks like one of the aliens from cocoon, glowing a luminous blue and floating slightly off the ground.

Console:

What is she doing by the road?

Skreem:

Who?

Console:

That girl over there, she’s glowing by the road.

Skreem:

Are you high right now? Jesus, I can’t believe you would put everyone’s life in danger like that, driving while stoned, I mean —

Console:

No, I swear to God. I am not high. There is a girl standing by the road right there. Hey! You! Hey!

Gaze, the recently violently deceased, hears the calls but assumes no one can see her so ignores them. She feels him around here. He’s close, so close. The murderer. Where is his car? Console calls out a few more times until finally Gaze accidentally looks over. The woman is looking right at her. What? She can see her? Gaze walks over to the car, curiously.

Console:

Who are you?

Gaze:

How can you see me?

Console:

Mine first.

Trip opens the backseat door even though she sees nobody there, and Gaze gets into the car.

9:45 P.M.

The camera pans out to capture the imposing view of The Mansion and the trail of cars that creep up her mountain. Dentata, Uteri, and Wake dance in their seats about one block of cars behind Console, Trip, Skreem, and Gaze. Uteri drove all the way from Vegas to visit with her two friends and celebrate Halloween. The three have decided to dress as the Powerpuff Girls, with wigs and everything.

Dentata:

Are you guys rolling tonight?

Uteri:

For sure, dude. I have the next three days off, I’m taking advantage of it. Why, you aren’t going to?

Dentata:

No, absolutely not. Don’t you remember what happened?

Uteri:

The drug had nothing to do with it. You had a totally fucked up experience but being on E just heightened the fucked-up-ness, you know? We are going to have so much fun tonight. It’ll be therapeutic for you. Have a good time, put horrible things in the back of your head and just enjoy it this time. I promise, we’ll make sure you are always okay. Nothing will happen. I promise.

Dentata:

Don’t promise things that you have no control over. We’ll see. It’s better to stay sober in case we want to leave early.

Uteri:

No way! We are not leaving early. Come on, man. I so need this vacation time, please don’t be all crabby like this.

Dentata:

I wish you could just understand that this place feels really fucked up to me. I feel fucked up, still, from what happened. I am not in the mood to party, but whatever, I’ll be cool. I’ll have a good time. Maybe if I find some shrooms. Something organic. E is not my thing.

Uteri:

I want to hang out and have a blast. Dancing! Oh I can’t wait to dance. I’m glad we’re all going together. Let’s try meet lots of people tonight, okay?

They go through the gate, show their tickets to the leery Parking Attendant One, pay the $10.00.

Wake:

That’s fucked up. Where else are we going to park? They can’t be allowed to charge that much when you have no other choice but to park there.

Dentata:

That’s exactly why they do it. It’s the same thing with monopolies. When you have something people need and you are the sole one who controls it, you can do or charge whatever the fuck you want for it. Principles of capitalism. Money, money, money.

Uteri:

Where exactly are we supposed to park? There doesn’t seem to be much organization.

Wake:

There’s guys up there, maybe they tell you where to park.

Parking Attendant One, shining his flashlight into the woods:

Just park over there.

Dentata:

Where? Just anywhere?

Parking Attendant One:

Yes, it’s fine. We have a system.

Dentata parks the car. The women collect their things.

Dentata, calling to him from the car:

Hey, what can we bring in?

Parking Attendant One:

You can bring anything. They don’t check you at the door.

Dentata:

Really? That’s pretty cool. Thanks.

Parking Attendant One:

Have a good time.

Dentata, to the ladies:

Wow, that’s excellent. There won’t be any problem finding substances tonight. I’m feeling more excited about this party now. That’s pretty chill that we won’t get searched.

Uteri:

You have no idea how many lipsticks I have lost, or people I met during the night whose numbers I wanted but couldn’t get because they took our pens. Even cigarettes and lighters for that matter. They usually take candy too, when they are really being assholes. I’m so glad I brought candy and cigs with me. I won’t have to buy any inside.

Wake:

Do you guys have everything?

Dentata:

Yeah, let’s get going.

Uteri:

Cool.

The camera follows them as they walk up to the house. The woods seem to be whispering and laughing around them, but it might just be all of the people parking their cars. It’s weird because there seem to be voices everywhere, but people are not visible. It is as if cars are spread out among the thick woods, too far away to see each other, clueless about what’s around, what’s safe. And the muffled giggles. They give Dentata, Wake and Uteri chills. Oddly enough, the music from the party also fills the hills. There must be speakers in these woods, all through the woods. But the voices are still louder than the music. The three Powerpuffs hold hands as they walk up the hill.

9:55 P.M.

The camera swivels from their pink, blue, and green backs and winds its way down The Mansion’s mountainside. It stops at a bright orange Saturn that contains Lily, NRG, Secrete and Chamelia.

Lily, the cyclops gorgon baby of the group, is dressed as Leela from Futurama, with her hair dyed bright purple.

NRG is an x-files classified project: her body has been genetically altered to produce an enzyme that creates metal, fueled by billions of energy-producing mitochondria. She can, by concentrating, produce knife slivers from any part of her body.

Secrete’s human body was synthesized with orchid genes and can now synthesize chlorophyll and spray poisonous orchid juice. Her skin has a distinct green tint.

Chamelia is a part of the government’s cyborg project. She is a shapeshifter and since it is Halloween she is wearing her “natural” reptilian shape. She has ridges down her back and every so often her tongue slithers out. They have all escaped different government institutions: mental hospitals, labs, and other places that speak boy.

They arrive at the imposing gate, hand over their tickets and $10.00.

Parking Attendant One:

Nice costumes.

Lily, the only one actually wearing a costume:

Thanks, dude.

The women look at each other and burst out laughing. NRG drives the car through the woods of The Mansion. The cars are moving much faster through the whole parking process than they were at the gate, and in about a minute Parking Attendant Two shines a light on their parking spot. There is no one parked nearby, odd because there was just a line of 20 or more cars ahead of them and they seem to have, well, disappeared.

NRG:

Weird, huh? So many cars but where is everyone? Creeps, dude.

Lily:

This must be a really big piece of property. I wonder how tight security will be?

Chamelia:

We all have to stick together. If anything happens and the cops bust people, we have to book like no one’s business. We have to be so careful tonight. I don’t want a lick of trouble.

Lily:

Is it safe to be here at all?

Secrete:

Oh hell yeah. Just so long as there's no cops. The rent-a-cops have no authority whatsoever. They can’t do anything other than be big assholes, you know. Just be cool.

NRG:

Okay ladies, let’s hike up there.

They all get out of the car. None of them smoke or do drugs. They are only here because with their motley appearances they blend much easier at a rave than, say, at the supermarket. They usually stay inside during the day. They met at one of Mr. Motel Chain’s establishments down towards San Diego, trying to lay low.

Lily had been hitchhiking and they picked her up on their way to Los Angeles, after having stolen a BMW. Their meeting was an odd coincidence, but the companionship is very much appreciated by all of the women. They are all hoping to just have some fun for the first time together. They walk up the hill, listening to the blaring trance music. Up ahead, they see Parking Attendant Three walking towards them. He reaches them and stops. He looks them up and down, sneers/grins and creepily giggles.

Parking Attendant Three:

Those are some great costumes. I wonder what you young things look like underneath all that shit.

NRG:

Not much different.

Parking Attendant Three, raising his eyebrow:

Right.

Behind the women, Security Guards 1-4 emerge from the woods. They are all wearing security outfits, but they look more like a pack of hyenas, giggling hysterically, even slobbering a little bit. Oozing with sperm.

Security Guard One:

We can make this quick. One blow job for each of us and you won’t get in any trouble.

NRG:

Get the fuck away from us. You are not getting anything. Come on, ladies.

NRG tries to walk past him but Security Guard Two grabs Lily’s purple ponytail. Lily turns around to face him. He tries to kiss her, and she holds his face in her hands and focuses her eye on him. Before it hits him, he puts his hand in her crotch and squeezes hard. She cries out and concentrates harder, staring him down with her Medusan eye. Security Guard Two begins to stiffen, becoming stone. He shatters between Lily’s palms.

Security Guard One:

What the fuck was that? You crazy bitch, I’m going to fucking kill you.

He lunges towards Lily. NRG blocks him and allows her rage to focus her internal knives. She stands in front of Security Guard One and raises her arms: The slivers shoot through her skin, out of her clothes, and cover him. He falls to the ground, covered in silver prickles.

Security Guard Three pushes Chamelia to the ground and climbs on top of her. He tries to kiss her, and holds her head to his. All of a sudden he begins trembling and Chamelia’s tongue bursts through his head. She pushes him off and vomits in the bushes.

Secrete spits her parasitic poison onto Security Guard Four’s face. It attaches itself to his cheek and begins feeding. Soon he is covered with the pink gooey poison, then becomes nothing but a blob.

The guards down, they women stand around, in shock.

NRG, finally speaking:

It’s good to know we can all take care of each other. Good to know.

They stand in a circle, pull themselves together. Chamelia continues puking in the bushes.

Lily:

It’s moments like these where I wish I smoked. Maybe I’ll start tonight.

Chamelia, wiping her mouth off:

Maybe I’ll start with you.

Lily:

I’m just kidding. Sort of.

Secrete:

Do we even dare go up there, I mean, what the hell was that about?

NRG:

Well I said security could be assholes. Guess they just proved that shit right. Let’s try to brush it off. They could have hurt us much more worse than they did, so we should look up to the sky, say thank you, and let’s have a good time.

They hug and take hold of hands to walk the rest of the distance to the house.

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