Amish Christmas Joy (13 page)

All the older students were working quietly, so she returned to help Joy copy the alphabet in her tablet. When the hour for arithmetic was up, the older students exchanged papers and graded each other’s work. When each student had a chance to see their mistakes, the papers were passed to the front, where Leah collected them.

At ten o’clock, she said, “All right, children, it’s time for recess. Go to the bathroom, get drinks of water and sharpen your pencils now so that you don’t have to do it later.”

The room dissolved into a beehive of activity as the children put away their work and grabbed their coats to play outside.

Anna brought Emmy Chupp to Joy’s desk. “This is Emmy. She wants to play Bear with us. Do you want to play?”

Joy looked eager to join them, but she held back. “I don’t know that game.”

“It’s easy,” Emmy said. “One of us is the bear and we try to catch someone else. Then they are the bear. It’s fun, come on.”

Caleb came forward. He said, “Don’t forget to put on your coat.”

“Will you watch me play Bear, Daddy?”

“That was my intention. Go on outside. I need to speak to Leah for a minute.”

He waited until the last child was out the door before he spoke. “It seems to be going well, don’t you think?”

“Did you expect it to go badly?”

“I had visions of screaming and temper tantrums. I’m happy to see I was wrong.”

“The day isn’t over yet.” She walked to her desk and he joined her.

“What is your assessment of her learning readiness?”

She looked at him in surprise. “Don’t you sound like a teacher?”

He flushed with embarrassment. “I’m doing my best to be an informed parent.”

“I’m happy to see that. By this age, she should be in the second grade, but she is below the first-grade level in reading and comprehension. I don’t believe her grandmother devoted much time to actual instructions. Joy is eager to learn, but she has a lot of catching up to do.”

“What can I do to help her?”

“Work on reading. Read to her every night. Let her follow along with the words and repeat them after you. You may want to teach her some of our German songs. That way she won’t feel so left out during our morning singing. I’ll give you a list of the ones that are easy.”

“Good.” He gestured toward the door. “I’d better get outside before recess is over. I don’t want to miss seeing her be the bear.”

Leah called to him before he reached the door. “Caleb, you are doing a good job with her. I see a lot of improvement in her behavior.”

A wry smile pulled the corner of his mouth up. “You weren’t with us when she jumped out of a moving buggy on the highway. She has a long way to go.”

Leah hesitated to ask, but she wanted to know. “Does that mean you’ll be staying longer than you thought?”

His smile widened. “I’ve found more than one reason to stick around.”

He went out the door and Leah drew a sharp breath. Did he mean her? Had she given him the impression she would welcome his attentions? Her head told her no, but her heart disagreed.

At ten-fifteen, Leah rang the bell to bring the children back to class. Her grades four to eight had reading classes. Each student came and stood beside her, then read from their assignment and answered her questions to determine their comprehension of what they had read. All the time she was listening to her students, she was aware of Caleb sitting at the back of the room, watching her every move. She hadn’t been this flustered since her first day as a teacher.

Eleven-thirty finally rolled around. She stood in front of her desk. “Children, you may go wash your hands, get your lunch boxes and return to your desks. Please go by rows. If any of the younger children need help, older brothers or sisters may go with them.”

Joy fetched her lunch box and carried it to her father. “Can we go home now? I’m tired.”

“School isn’t over, Joy.”

“But I want to go home now.”

Caleb glanced at Leah. She came to sit beside him on the bench and spoke to Joy. “Are you feeling okay?”

Her lower lip stuck out. “I want to go home.”

Leah met Caleb’s gaze and raised her eyebrows. There wasn’t any point in pushing the child to remain. He nodded in resignation.

Emmy ran up to Joy. “Don’t go home yet. We’re going to have another recess after we eat, and we can play on the swings. After that, we’ll have story time and then we can color something. I’ll let you use my crayons.”

“You will?”

“
Ja,
I have lots of colors.”

“Okay.”

“What did you bring for lunch? My
mamm
sent me a roast beef sandwich and a big slice of carrot cake.”

“
Mammi
gave me a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I named Leah’s puppies Pickles, Peanut Butter and Jelly.” The two little girls walked back toward their seats.

Caleb blew out a breath of relief. “Crisis averted by crayons. Who knew they worked as well as animal crackers?”

They shared a smile, which sent a burst of happiness through Leah. He had a sense of humor, and she liked that about him. She liked a lot of things about Caleb Mast. But she couldn’t sit here and flirt with him. She had a class to teach.

“Everyone back in your seats.”

Joy opened her lunch box and was unwrapping her sandwich when Emmy stopped her. “We have to pray first.”

Leah walked to the head of the class and clasped her hands together. The students repeated a prayer in unison and then quickly ate lunch. When they were done, they hurried outside. Caleb followed them out.

Leah made two cups of hot tea from the water in the kettle and carried them outside along with her sandwich. She sat on the steps to keep an eye on the children. And on Caleb.

* * *

Caleb pushed Joy and Emmy on the swings, but the two girls soon decided they wanted to play on the teeter-totter. He saw Leah had come out of the building, and he crossed the schoolyard to join her on the steps. She inched a little farther away. He’d forgotten for a moment that there were many eyes on them.

He found her attractive, but he was beating his head against a closed door. They were separated by her sister’s lies and so much more. Any feelings they had for each other were doomed before they could have the chance to explore them. She knew it as well as he did.

“I made you a cup of tea.” She held out a mug.

“Danki.”
A strange yearning pulled at his insides. What would it be like if he wasn’t
Englisch?
What if they could put the past behind them and start fresh? What if he made a home here with Joy? An Amish home. The image pulled at his soul and forced him to admit that he had been wrong to leave his faith behind along with his family.

The sun was bright overhead. It reflected off the snow in a million sparkling pinpoints of light. There was a chill in the air, but he endured it without complaint. For a little while, they sat quietly and watched the children on the playground. He was acutely aware that she was only inches away. He beat down the urge to reach for her hand.

She broke the silence first. “Joy seems to be doing better now.”

His daughter was laughing as she rode up and down on the wooden teeter-totter. Anna was standing beside her. “I see she has made a friend. I’ve met Anna. Who is the other one?”

“Emmy Chupp.”

“I don’t think I know the family.”

“The Chupps moved here last year. Her father works at the lumberyard. He fell and broke his leg a few weeks ago.”

“I’m sorry to hear that. His daughter has taken quite a liking to Joy.”

“Is that surprising?”

“Not at all. Even with the language barrier, she seems to be interacting well.”

“Both Emmy and Anna have more experience speaking English. Emmy helps her mother and older sister in their soap-and-candle shop in town, so she speaks to many tourists. Anna’s sister, Karen, married Jonathan Dresher, a convert to our faith. He credits Anna with teaching him our Pennsylvania Dutch language.”

Caleb leaned back on his elbows and crossed his boots. “I’ve never known an outsider who chose to become Amish.”

“You must ask him to tell you his story someday.”

“I hope I have the chance to hear it.”

She turned her head to frown at him. “You’re not leaving yet, are you? Joy is not ready for that.”

He wasn’t ready for it, either. What he really wanted to know was Leah’s feelings on the subject. “Will you miss me when I’m gone? Should I stay?”

He could tell he had flustered her. She stared at her hands wrapped around her mug of tea. When she wasn’t looking, he had a chance to study the delicate curve of her neck and the rosy color in her cheeks. Did she have any idea how beautiful she was? He was glad she hadn’t married his brother. He took a sip of tea and waited for her answer.

“I’m not sure that my opinion matters one way or the other.”

“It does to me.”

She sighed heavily. “What would you have me say? I am Amish, Caleb. You are not. I have taken my vows. If nothing else stood between us, that would. I urge you to think of Joy. She has already lost or been abandoned by everyone she knows and loves. You’re her father. She belongs with you.”

“I am thinking of her. The longer I’m with her the less I want to go away and leave her here.”

Leah placed a hand on his arm. “Then stay.”

Chapter Twelve

L
eah realized that Caleb was waiting for more encouragement from her. She was flattered that he cared for her. She cared for him, too. Perhaps more than she should, but she couldn’t give him what he wanted.

She turned sideways on the step so she was facing him. “Caleb, if you stay or if you leave, it cannot be because of me. Would I like you to remain and become a part of our community? Of course. Your parents would, too. Many of your old friends would rejoice to know you have returned to us, but such a decision is too important to be made for one reason only. Pray for guidance. I will pray that you follow the path our Lord has chosen for you.”

“Wise and kind as well as pretty. It’s no wonder you are such a good teacher.”

No man had called her pretty in a long time. His smile brought a warm glow to her heart. He truly had changed from the wild and reckless boy she once knew.

“Daddy, I found a cousin. I didn’t know I had a cousin, did you?” Joy headed toward them, pulling David along by the hand.

Leah saw the sorrow that filled Caleb’s eyes before he turned from her and gave his attention to the children. “I knew there was something I forgot to tell you.”

She threw her arms around David in a bear hug. “This is David. His daddy is your brother, and that makes us cousins. I always wanted a cousin.”

“Hello, David. It’s nice to meet you.”

David pulled away from Joy. “
Mamm
says not to speak to you.”

Caleb nodded in resignation. “You are right to do what she tells you.”

Leah rose from her place beside Caleb and took both Joy and David by the hand. “Did your
mamm
say you couldn’t speak to Joy?”

“Nee.”

She began leading them toward the swing set. “Then you two must get to know each other. Why don’t you push Joy on the swing and tell her all about your family and your home. David’s father is your daddy’s brother, but his mother is my sister. That makes David my nephew.”

Joy tipped her head sideways as she gazed up at Leah. “Does that make you my aunt?”

“
Nee,
it makes me David’s aunt. We say
aenti.
You and I are not related at all.”

Joy looked disappointed. “I never had an
aenti
before.”

David brightened. “You do have one. My
mamm
is your
aenti.
”

“She is?”

Leah nodded. “Rhonda is your
aenti,
and her husband, Wayne, is your
onkel,
your uncle.”

Joy’s face grew troubled. “Mama used to tell me her boyfriends were my uncles. I didn’t like them. Sometimes they were mean.”

“My
daed
is not mean. You would like him. He takes me sledding and ice skating in the winter, and he lets me help him drive the team of horses during the summer.”

“He doesn’t sound mean. I might like him.”

David pointed toward a farm in the distance. “That’s our
haus.
”

“What does that mean?”

Leah translated. “It means
house.
That’s where David and his parents live.”

Joy shaded her eyes to look into the distance. “That’s not so far.”

“It only takes me ten minutes to walk to school. I have a brown-and-white pony named Budget. He’s really fast.”

Joy grinned. “I like horses. Can I meet him?”

“I don’t know. Mom doesn’t like your dad.”

Leah looked over her shoulder. Caleb rose from his seat and entered the school. Once again, she was struck by how alone he seemed to be. She prayed God would show her the way to heal the breach between their families.

* * *

Caleb had come to school to make sure that Joy felt comfortable in the new surroundings. Although his main reason for being in the building was to keep an eye on his daughter, he found his gaze constantly drawn to Leah. He watched the way she moved, the way she gestured with her hands when she spoke, the way she seemed genuinely interested in every student in her classes. It was clear that her students adored her in return. The entire room was well behaved and respectful.

After their conversation on the steps, he was pleased to know she wasn’t indifferent to him, but he also knew their relationship wouldn’t go forward until he made a major commitment.

He wasn’t sure he could do it. Coming back to the Amish had not been on his to-do list. But then, neither had becoming a father to Joy. The Lord’s path for him was taking some strange twists and turns. Leah was right. Remaining in Hope Springs wasn’t something he could decide on his own. He needed divine guidance. He might be rusty at praying, but he still knew how to do it.

Please, Lord, show me the path You would have me take and give me the courage to follow it.

At three-thirty, Leah addressed the school. “On Wednesday, the day after tomorrow, we are going to do a special project. We are going to make a feast for our feathered friends. When the snow is deep, the birds have difficulty finding food. Since Christmas is just around the corner, I thought we should lend them a helping hand. I have made a list of things I would like you to bring to school.”

She moved down the rows, handing out note cards. When she reached the back, where Caleb was seated, she handed him a card, too. He turned it over. It said,
This way, you will have many hands to help make your decorations.

She walked back to the front of the room. “You are dismissed. I will see you all tomorrow.”

Caleb walked forward through the stream of children headed out the door. He helped Joy gather her things and stow them in her desk. “What did you think of your first day of school?”

“I like recess.”

“That was my favorite part of school, too.” He was grateful that she had managed the entire day without a meltdown and had made a few friends in the process.

Leah straightened up the classroom and erased the problems from the blackboard. “Tomorrow will be even more fun.”

Joy gaped at her. “I have to come here
again?
”

Caleb laughed. “Only until you finish the eighth grade.”

She shut her desk. “I hope that doesn’t take very long. Leah, can you walk home with us?”

Bless you, child, you took the words right out of my mouth.
Caleb waited with bated breath for Leah to answer.

“Since we both are going in the same direction, I don’t see why not.”

“Cool.”

Caleb made sure Joy was bundled up against the cold and that he had his rising excitement in check. Just because Leah agreed to walk a little ways with Joy didn’t mean she wanted to walk out with him.

Leah closed the school door behind them and tied her bonnet under her chin. “I think we are in for more snow.”

Caleb glanced at the low gray clouds scuttling by. “You may be right.”

They fell into step together as they started down the path through the woods. It would have been almost as easy to reach Leah’s house by walking along the road, but the quiet stillness of the trees offered privacy and a feeling of intimacy.

When Joy ran a little ways ahead of them along the path, Leah asked quietly, “Are you seriously considering staying in Hope Springs?”

He wished he could tell what she was thinking. “I have started to think that it might be an option.”

“What has changed your mind?”

He wanted to say she had, but he didn’t. “Many things, but mostly it’s because I have missed all of Joy’s life up until now. I don’t want to miss more.”

“I can understand that. It won’t be easy if you do stay.”

“I know. I have to find a way to make it work, if that exists. Wayne and Rhonda are dead set against my staying.”

“Perhaps they will come around in time.”

“Maybe. Do you think they will? You know them better than I do.” He took a huge leap of faith and reached for her hand.

* * *

Startled, Leah almost pulled away, but she didn’t. He slowed his steps and so did she. She wasn’t in any hurry to reach the place where they would part ways.

Remembering Rebecca’s words about how God had used her as a tool to bring Gideon back to his faith, Leah wondered if God wanted to use her in the same fashion to help Caleb.

It was a fine line to walk. She would have to guard her heart against caring too much for a man who was forbidden.

She thought about his question and finally said, “Rhonda carries so much bitterness in her heart. I don’t know if she will ever be able to see past that.”

“Can you?”

“The past can’t be changed. It is what we do in the present that matters. Can you leave the English world and all its temptations behind?”

“Can I live Amish again? Maybe.”

“I fear there’s not much conviction in your voice.”

“You’re right. I have doubts, but I’m open to the idea. I couldn’t have said that two weeks ago. I’m praying about it, and I couldn’t have said that two weeks ago, either.”

“Then I will pray you make the right decision.”

Joy came running up and squeezed in between them. She took each of their hands. Leah shared a smile with Caleb as Joy began to chatter about the things she enjoyed doing with her new friends at school.

Leah tempered her rising happiness with a heavy dose of practicality. Many things stood between them, and she wasn’t at all sure of what God wanted from her.

“Joy, is your daddy taking you to see the Christmas parade in Hope Springs on Saturday?”

Joy grinned at her dad. “Can we go to the Christmas parade? Please, please, please?”

Caleb rolled his eyes. “Now that Leah has mentioned it, I’m pretty sure that you will bug me until I do. Since when has Hope Springs sponsored a Christmas parade?”

“This will be our first annual Christmas parade. It was the brainchild of the new mayor. Tourism falls off in the winter months. He thought a Christmas parade might bring more people to town and give a boost to the local economy.”

“It’s a good idea, if the weather cooperates. What is the forecast for Saturday?”

“The paper said it will be sunny but cold. Still, it could be worse. Everyone is looking forward to the event.”

“Are you going to be there?” Joy asked.

“I am going with my sister and her family.”

“Oh.” Joy’s lower lip stuck out as she pouted. “I wanted you to go with us.”

“I am sure that we will see each other there.”

“That’s not the same. You don’t like me anymore.” Joy let go of their hands and ran toward home.

Leah called after, but she didn’t look back.

Caleb said, “Don’t worry. She gets cranky like this when she gets tired, and she has had a long day.”

Leah felt terrible for upsetting her. “I will remember that and make sure that she takes a rest break at school.”

“I should keep her in sight so she doesn’t get lost. See you tomorrow.” He followed his daughter, leaving Leah watching them and wondering if Joy would ever gain the sense of security and confidence that she needed.

The following morning proved to be a difficult one for both Leah and Joy. Emmy Chupp’s mother arrived for a visit and brought fresh baked cupcakes for the class because it was Emmy’s birthday. She sat quietly at the back of the room just as Caleb was doing. Joy became increasingly restless throughout the morning and had trouble staying on track.

She frequently got up from her desk and disrupted the other children who were trying to work. At recess, she refused to play with the other children and remained at her desk. Emmy’s mother went home after she distributed the cupcakes at lunch. When she was gone, Joy went out to play, and Leah held a short conference with Caleb.

“What am I doing wrong?” She was seated behind her desk, feeling worn-out and frustrated.

He rested his hip casually against one corner of the desk. “I don’t think we’re doing anything wrong. Joy has trouble adjusting to change. I think once she becomes used to a routine, her behavior will improve.”

“The teacher is the one who is supposed to be encouraging the parent, not the other way around.”

“We are both finding our way with her. My one consolation is that her life here is so much better than when she was with her mother.”

Leah moved a set of papers from one side of her desk to the other. “Have you heard anything from her mother?”

“Not a word. My attorney let me know that my petition for full custody has been granted. It will take more time to have Valerie’s parental rights severed permanently.”

“Has Joy spoken about her?”

“Not since the evening we left your place and she jumped out of the buggy on the way home. Do you think I should talk to her about Valerie?”

“I don’t know. On one hand, I think it would be good for her to share what she’s feeling, but on the other hand, I don’t want to upset her more than she already is.”